Authors: Claire Hajaj
Tags: #Contemporary Fiction, #Palestine, #1948, #Israel, #Judaism, #Swinging-sixties London, #Transgressive love, #Summer, #Family, #Saga, #History, #Middle East
âThe others, fine,' Salim said, coming to stand beside him and motioning the stallholder to put the pots on the back of a wheelbarrow shuttling backwards and forwards between the stall and the cars. âBut not the tree. It's a lime. They don't grow here, not in this heat. In one week it will be dead. He's trying to rob you.' He gave the stallholder a sarcastic smile, while the dark man flashed his yellow teeth
back.
Marc shook his head. âIt won't die. I won't let it. I'll water it every
day.'
Jude saw Salim wipe his forehead and then bend down to the boy. âListen, Marc. I was a farmer once. I know about citrus trees. I can tell you this isn't going to work. You should listen to me. Now don't cry,' he said hastily, as tears started to flow down Marc's cheeks. âOh come on now,' he said, straightening up in embarrassment. âWhat is it? Shall I get you a bucket?'
Jude stepped up to the two of them. She had to fight the urge to hug Marc to her chest, knowing that it would inflame Salim. He would say
why can't you let him learn to be a man?
And she would answer
he's only six â he's hardly learned how to be a child
.
âWhat's the harm in taking this tree home?' she said. âHe'll learn something from it, even if it dies. You could help him look after it. It might be good for both of you.' She whispered this last to Salim, lightly pinching his
arm.
Salim looked at them both, and then threw his hands up in defeat. âYou're too soft with him,' he said. She watched with sorrow and irritation as his hands found Sophie's head and rubbed her soft dark hair while Marc stood aside, his white arms crossed.
âLet's go home, us and all the plants,' she said, forcing a smile. âLet's make the best garden in Kuwait.' She took Marc's hand in her own and reached for Salim with the other.
For a second Salim's face looked just as pained as Marc's. But then he rolled his eyes, paid the stallholder and followed his family back to the broiling
car.
They planted the tree in the centre of Marc's garden, back at the villa. Long after Jude and Sophie had gone inside to make dinner, Salim saw Marc sitting on the steps outside the glass front door. The white sky had cooled to pink and violet, and the little lime tree fluttered in the rising night breeze.
The boy looked up as Salim came to sit beside him. Marc's eyes were red from the dust of planting. Around them, the hoarse song of the muezzin filled the
dusk.
âAre you happy with your tree, then?' he asked his son. Marc nodded. Salim felt the boy's weariness drift over him, like a cloud of
dust.
âDid you know that when I was a boy, I had a tree too?' The blond head shook slightly. âMy parents planted it when I was born, and I used to look after it and pick the fruit off it every year. You and I can do that together, if you want.'
Marc looked up again, eyes suddenly wide. âOkay.' Then suddenly he slid along the stoop until he touched his father's leg. Salim put his arm around him, and they sat in silence, letting the sunset bleed through the air from the wasteland outside. He felt the wind pull through Marc's white hair, as insubstantial as thistledown. The boy's fingers were on his leg, clutching through the fabric. There was a weakness to him that terrified Salim. What chance would he have against the Mazens of this world?
Marc stirred, and he heard the small voice say, âIt's too hot to grow things here, you said.'
âThat's right.' Salim's eyes were drawn to the garden, the wet dust and the lime tree planted with an anxious tilt. âIt's the desert here. Trees and fruit like that one need water and cool air. That's why I told you to leave it,
habibi
. So I don't want you to be disappointed when it dies. You have to learn to face facts.'
There was a pause while Salim watched Marc contemplating this truth. Then the boy squeezed his hands together and said, âThings grow in England. I wish we lived there. Then my garden would be amazing.'
âBut we live here, Marc. This is our home.' Above the surprise Salim felt something colder settling on him. âYou're an Arab too. You belong here, not there.'
âI wish I was there,' said Marc again. He got to his feet, turned around and went back into the house, leaving Salim alone in the gathering
dark.
They spent the evening at a party in the desert, with friends and men who called themselves family. Kuwait was full of
family
, Palestinian
ay'an
who'd travelled to this honeypot where the black wealth oozed out of the ground for anyone to scoop up. Round their dinner tables and at their desert feasts, they'd talk about the brothers dying in Beirut and the camps. And then they'd sigh, wipe their hands and drive back to their villas with their jewelled wives and their plump children.
The family car pulled up in a valley between two high dunes
â
a place they called
Il-Saraj
, the Saddle. It was famous for its monthly rallies beloved by westerners and Kuwaitis alike. Salim's heart would swell as he filmed Sophie and Marc with his Super 8mm camera, their faces red with cheering from the height of the dunes, exhilarated by the echoing roar of engines and the squeal of tyres ripping up the ground into red strips of
dust.
On this evening, the Saddle was quiet. High tent walls were swaying slowly in the breeze of the valley floor. A goat and a sheep bleated sadly on the back of a pickup truck, their legs tied together. âOh no,' wailed Sophie, pressing her face to the car window as Salim turned off the engine. âAre they going to kill them?'
âThat's right,' her brother shot back. Salim could feel his feet kicking the back of the seat. âThey're going to pull their heads off and then we're going to eat them.' Sophie screamed, âNo, we won't, you're so horrible!' and started to
cry.
Salim shook his head and left Jude to sort it out. As he closed the car door on their voices, he saw a bedou wrapped in a red-checked
keffiyeh
hoist the sheep onto his shoulders, and carry it slowly away towards the stake and the knife.
Inside the red-fringed tent, the burned smell of Turkish coffee lay thick on the men sprawling on their low cushions. Adnan Al-Khadra was in the corner; he saw Salim and waved him over. Drums drifted in, and the wailing of a fiddle as a bedou raised his thin voice to the sunset
sky.
Adnan had been the first name on a list provided by Nadia for their arrival in Kuwait
â
more cousins of cousins, linked by a fragile trail of bloodlines to Abu Hassan and his long-dead first wife. He'd clapped Salim on the back, kissed him on both cheeks and called him
nephew
. Adnan honoured tradition by referring to Abu Hassan as
my brother
but his other habits screamed
modernist
: he liked to be called by his first name, and his youngest son
â
a keen gun of twenty-five
â
was a company man in Salim's new division at Odell.
Tonight he was cracking nuts with his teeth, in a finely tailored open-necked shirt and light linen trousers. His combed silver hair and deep black eyes made Salim think of a big, sleek American
car.
âSo tell me,' Adnan spat out a shell. âEverything's good with you? You start work tomorrow, right?'
â
Insha'Allah
,' Salim replied. Adnan grinned. âThat's right, that's right! Never trust the
Americani
until you get your first paycheque. They messed my Omar around on his salary like he was a dog begging for dinner. But now you and he will be working together. That's very good. He's a young man, still wild, you know? He needs someone with experience to show him how to ride the horse.'
Salim had heard it before.
Riding the horse
in Kuwait City meant clinging onto the mane of the American beast as it galloped through the Arab world. Adnan was saying:
look after my boy, he's one of your own
. He wasn't so modern that he expected his son to get by purely on his own skills.
Salim fantasized about telling Adnan he would happily pass his son's papers on to Human Resources. But the ropes of guilt and duty were wound too tight.
He nodded at Adnan. âI'll be happy to keep my eye on Omar,' he said as courteously as he could. âHe seems talented enough.'
Adnan hooted with laughter. âTalented! Yes, for sure he thinks he is. And what can his old father say? We're as useless as old cars to your generation, isn't that it? Let me tell you something. In your father's day and mine, people took different measures of a man. A successful man wasn't just rich
â
he was
â
how shall I say it?' He sucked the salt off his fingers and tapped his fist to his chest. âGenerous. He shared his money, his wisdom if he had any. Or even if he didn't! Your father was no genius, you know that. But he was generous in his way. He had an open hand. These days, it's all about how well you did in school, how smart you dress and how much you can cram onto your own plate. My son thinks he's a genius because I sent him to school in the States and the
Americani
gave him a job. He thinks that's all there is to life. And what about you, eh, Salim? Are you an old fellow or a new?' He beamed a white smile.
Jude came into the tent, her blonde hair glorious in the lamplight. A wave of cool air followed her in from the clear darkness outside. She smiled as she came up to him and his heart melted as it always did. Adnan rose to kiss her on the cheek. âThe lovely Jude. You look splendid. How are you, my lady?'
âHot as the devil in this tent,' Jude said, with a smiling sideways glance at Salim. âWhy don't you all come outside? The children are playing round the fire and the women say they won't dance without an audience.'
âWhat are we waiting for, then?' Salim took her hand and followed his wife out of the tent. Night had come down like a knife, and the desert cold sliced into him. The fire played underneath the bodies of the sheep and goat, their fat dripping in faint sizzles onto the crackling wood. Inside the tent, bedouin had laid large oval plates of rice with vermicelli, balls of cracked wheat and spiced lamb, cabbage leaves cooked in yoghurt and fragrant salads of cucumber and parsley.
Salim sat down on a rug in the sand next to Adnan. A young man came rushing up out of the firelight, his face flushed, all the absurdity of youth in his tight t-shirt and gulping Adam's apple.
The famous Omar
. He bent to shake Salim's hand. âWow, Salim Al-Ishmaeli! Right? So good to see you again. I can't believe we'll be working together!' Enthusiasm blazed from every syllable.
Working under me, not with me
. Salim bit back the words as he returned the handshake.
The women had started dancing around the flames. Jude was among them; he saw her, the sequins in her skirt flying like sparks, her feet bare and her hair around her shoulders darkening to deep gold. The secret of her heritage
â
their secret
â
sometimes made him love her even more. It was a hidden part of herself, visible only to him
â
like those Kuwaiti wives in their long black shrouds filled with the seductive power of the unseen.
She'd tried her best to blend in, taking Arabic lessons and imitating Arabic dancing. But her feet betrayed her roots. She was a northern girl skipping under a cloudy blue sky, to the light rhythms of dockyard shanties. There was nothing of the swaying, sliding east in her. Perhaps that was why he'd wanted her so
much.
Marc and Sophie joined her in the dance, their skin and hair turned to bronze against the fire. Sophie followed her mother, but Marc whirled and spun like the dervishes at Nabi Ruben. That was the last time Salim had seen his mother dance, on a night like this one in another world.
âSuch beautiful children.' It was Adnan, beside him. âYou're blessed to get two at once.'
âI know I am,' Salim said quietly. He watched them dance around and around in the golden haze. Ashes from the blaze were falling. They brushed his cheek like tears. It was bewitching to see his family so apart from him; like visions on a screen, their radiant happiness vanishing like sparks from the fire into the night
sky.
âYour wife is a brave woman to come here,' Adnan continued. Salim looked at him sharply. âWhy so?' he
said.
The older man shifted, his eyes fixed on the dancing children. âIt's hard for a western woman to bring up Arabic children. In the Arab way, I mean. Look at your ones. They can't speak to my grandchildren in Arabic. They don't know the Qur'an.'
âWait there, Adnan,' Salim said, trying to laugh. âYou can't tell me you know the Qur'an. I don't know it either
â
I went to Catholic school, remember?'
âBut you learned it, Salim. We all did and we all do now. So what if you're a believer? Who cares? It's the thing we share. It's what binds us together in this divided world.'
âMy children know their heritage,' Salim said. He tried to keep emotion out of his voice. âThey know where they come from.'
Adnan smiled and put his hand on Salim's shoulder. âMy son
â
you could be my son, you know
â
you forget something. Men don't raise children. Women do. What those children learn, what they take into their hearts, will come from her. That's why I say she's taken on a big challenge. I hope you can guide her with it, or your kids will be as much of an Arab as she
is.'
Salim searched for a protest
â
but suddenly there were plates of rice and dripping meat in front of them, and Adnan was seizing the first eager mouthful as the children danced on and
on.