Isobel and Emile (7 page)

She rests her head in her hands. Mr.Koch stands at the bottom of the stairs. He is wearing his jacket and a hat. The hat is a very smart-looking hat.

He says: ‘Isobel.'He says: ‘Isobel,we're closing up for the day.'

Isobel hears him. She does not say anything. She rests her head in her hands. Her fingers work into her hair. She wants to be able to do this.

Mr. Koch says: ‘Will you be all right for the night?' Isobel does not say anything. Mr. Koch says: ‘Do you need anything?'

Isobel sits on the bed. She works her fingers deeper into her hair. She makes her hands into fists and she pulls.

Mr. Koch says: ‘I will see you in the morning.' He says: ‘Good night, Isobel.'

She does not say: ‘Good night, Mr. Koch.'

She hears Mr. Koch go out the door that leads into the alley. She hears him close the door behind him. She hears him lock it.

She could look out the window and see him walking away.

She pushes her hair away from her face. She stands up. There is a light bulb hanging from the ceiling. She goes to the middle of the room. She is standing under the light bulb. There is a cord dangling from it. She pulls the cord.

The light turns on.

Isobel is standing in the middle of the room. She does not stand up straight. She is stooped over. She does not want to stand up straight. Her body hurts. She turns towards the sink.

There is a mirror over the sink. She does not want to look into it. She is wearing a nice dress. There are frills around the collar. It is what she wore to the train station.

She wanted to look nice.

The dress is dirty now. She does not have anything else to wear. She does not want to see herself.

She goes to the sink. She pushes her hair away from her face. She washes her face in the sink. She dries her face with the towel hanging next to the sink. There is a towel hanging next to the sink.

She goes back to the bed.

She undoes the buttons on her dress. She lets it drop to the floor. She crawls into the bed.

She wants something else to wear.

She pulls the blanket over herself. She tries to go to sleep.

Emile, I am here.

I am back in your room over the shop. I am here. I wasn't sure that
I would come, I wasn't sure that I wouldn't end up back at my
mother's house. I know that I said that I wouldn't, but even when I
said it I didn't know if I had the courage to really do it.

I did it.

I walked from the train station. I came to the store and I went
inside. I went up the stairs.

It was dark. I was afraid to turn the light on. I was afraid that I
would be found. I didn't know what would happen if someone found
me. And I wanted to have that one night. I needed it.

I was sitting on your bed. Your bed. I spent the night drinking it
all in, so that I will remember everything.

The whole night, my heart was racing. I was terrified and exhilarated
and I felt alive, Emile. Cold and hungry and alone and alive.

I felt alive.

I am living here now. I'm going to be working for Mr. Koch. But
it doesn't matter what happens now. I did it. And I will remember it.
Whatever happens will be worth it, so long as I can remember that.

I love you.

5

Emile is sitting in a theatre.

Nicolas is not sitting beside him. There are people he does not know sitting beside him. On one side there is someone wearing a hat. On the other is someone with dark brown hair.

He does not know who these people are. He does not think that he had ever seen them before they sat down beside him. Emile is sitting between them. His hands are folded in his lap.He is trying to be calm.

He is waiting for the lights to go out.

The lights go out.

The people in the theatre were talking. They stop talking. It is quiet. Emile makes his hands relax. He rests the palms of his hands on top of his legs.

Everyone looks at the front of the theatre. Emile 's palms are wet.He wipes them on his trousers. It is a movie theatre. A spotlight turns on in front of the screen.

Someone stands up. She walks to the front of the theatre. She is wearing a nice dress and high-heeled shoes. She does not walk steadily. It is like she is not sure how to walk in high-heeled shoes.

It is Agatha. She is nervous.

Agatha walks to where the light is on in front of the screen. There is a microphone on a stand there. She is carrying a piece of paper in her hand.

She speaks into the microphone. She says what is going to happen. There are going to be short films. They are going to play one after the other.

She says the names of the films. She reads them off the piece of paper in her hand. After she says the name of each film she says the names of the people who made it. Her hair is piled on top of her head. There is a bit that is not piled on top of her head. It is combed so that it goes across her forehead.

The people in the theatre clap after everything she says.

When she says the names of the people who made the films, the people who made the films stand up. They are all in the theatre. When they stand up everyone claps. When they sit down everyone stops clapping. Then Agatha says something else and everyone claps again.

Agatha says Emile 's name.

He is sitting in the balcony. He hears his name. He is supposed to stand up. He does not stand up all the way. He stands up enough for Agatha to see him.

She looks on the floor. She does not see Emile. Someone in the balcony sees Emile stand up. He starts clapping. Agatha hears him start clapping.

She looks up. She sees Emile. She points to Emile. Everyone starts clapping.

Emile tries to smile. He sits down.

Everyone stops clapping.

Agatha says the name of another film. Everyone claps. She says the names of the people who made the film. They stand up. Everyone claps again. The people who are standing sit down. Everyone stops clapping.

Agatha reads the name of the last film written on the piece of paper in her hand. There is clapping and people standing up and sitting down and then the clapping stops again.

Agatha puts her hands behind her back.

She says: ‘Thank you, everyone, for coming out tonight.'

Everyone claps again. There are some people who shout. Agatha walks back to where she was sitting. The light in front of the screen goes off.

There are curtains over the screen. The curtains open. Everyone stops clapping. The films start playing.

Emile says: ‘Don't look.'

Isobel puts her hands over her eyes.

This is not in the movie theatre. It is the room over the grocery store. It is Emile's film.

Isobel is sitting on a bed. It is the bed with plain white sheets. Emile is sitting beside her.

She has her hands over her eyes. Emile stands up.

He says: ‘Promise you won't look.'

Isobel says: ‘I won't.'

It is summer. The window is open. Emile's and Isobel's feet are bare.

Emile walks to a corner of the room.

There is a suitcase in the corner. Beside it there is a knapsack. They are both on the floor. Beside the knapsack there is a pile of clothes. They are Emile 's clothes.

Emile opens the suitcase. He reaches inside the suitcase. He does something with his hands inside the suitcase and then he lifts them up into the air. He is moving carefully. There are strings hanging from his fingers.

A girl climbs out of the suitcase. She is not really a girl. She is too small. She fits inside a suitcase. She is made of wood.

She climbs out of the suitcase and she stands on the floor. She turns her head like she is looking around the room. It is like she is looking for something.

She starts to walk. She puts one of her feet in front of her other foot. She moves clumsily. She takes a step. She takes another step.

She is walking towards Isobel.

Emile says: ‘Open your eyes.'

Emile is kneeling in the middle of the room. Isobel opens her eyes. She sees him. His body is bent over the girl standing on the floor. Isobel looks at Emile and then she looks at the girl standing on the floor in front of him.

The girl stops moving.

She stops moving because there is someone looking at her. It is like she is shy. She looks down at the floor. She stands still. Isobel looks at her. Isobel makes a small sound. The girl looks up at her.

Isobel says: ‘Is that my hair?'

The girl has thick black hair. It hangs down her back to her waist. Her eyes are made from dark glass beads.

Emile says: ‘It is.' He says: ‘This is you.'

Isobel says: ‘Oh.'

She looks at the girl again. The girl looks up at her. Isobel smiles.

Isobel says: ‘I like her.'

Emile says: ‘She wants to say something.'

Isobel says: ‘She does?'

Emile says: ‘She does.'

The girl moves her hands to touch her hair. She moves it so that it is not in her face. She moves her hands over her dress. She makes it look neat. She holds her hands in front of her.

Emile looks at Isobel. He says: ‘Say something.'

Isobel says: ‘I don't have anything to say.'

The girl holds her hands in front of her. Her hands move like she is rubbing them together. It is like she is impatient.

She is looking up at Isobel.

Isobel says: ‘No.' She says: ‘That's not it.' She pauses. Then she says: ‘I have something to say. I'm not going to say it.'

It is like the girl is speaking now. She is not speaking. She is only a puppet. She cannot speak. Isobel is speaking. The puppet moves like she is the one speaking.

Isobel says: ‘I don't want to say it.'

The girl's face is pale. She looks away, like she is struggling to find the right words.

Isobel says: ‘I won't.'

The girl is wearing a black dress. It is made from a tattered old cloth Emile found. It is belted with a piece of string. Under the dress her legs are bare.

Isobel says: ‘I woke up this morning.' The girl is still looking away. It is like she is afraid of what she is saying.

She says: ‘I woke up this morning and I was happy. It's not much, to say that I was happy. It's not enough. But what I have to say does not make me happy.'

She is not afraid of what she is saying. She is looking away because it is hard to say it. She has to concentrate.

She says: ‘I woke up this morning. You were already downstairs. You were having coffee with Mr. Koch and waiting for the delivery truck to come.'

Her voice changes. She is speaking differently. It is like it is not hard anymore.

She says: ‘I wasn't ready to get up when you got up. I felt you get out of the bed and I pulled the blanket closer to me.'

She settles into what she is saying. It is like she is drifting away into it. She is still looking away. It is a different kind of looking away.

She says: ‘And then I woke up. I sat up in the bed. I pulled my hands through my hair.'

She says: ‘It didn't do much. But I like the feel of my hands in my hair. I like how it feels when I pull it.'

She reaches her hand up to touch her hair. Her fingers touch it lightly. It is like she does not realize that she is touching her hair.

She says: ‘I got out of bed. I walked over to the sink. I filled it with water.'

She says: ‘I washed my face.'

She says: ‘I washed my face and then I emptied the sink. I watched the water carry my sleep away.'

She says: ‘And I stood there.'

She realizes that she is touching her hair. She drops her hand. Her arms are by her sides now.

She says: ‘I could see the door in the mirror.'

She says: ‘I was standing there. I was naked.'

The girl is not looking away. She is not looking at anything. She is standing straight and tall.

She says: ‘I wanted to see you come into the room. I wanted to see my face when I saw you.'

It is like she is being drawn up into what she is saying.

She says: ‘I was happy.'

The film ends.

The theatre is dark. Everyone claps their hands in the dark. The next film starts. The clapping stops.

Emile does not want to be sitting beside people he does not know. He stands up. His hands are trembling slightly. He does not want his hands to be trembling. He tries to hold them still. He says: ‘Excuse me.'

He leaves the theatre.

Nicolas is working at the bar.

He is wearing a white shirt. He is not wearing a tie. His shirt is open at the collar. It is that kind of a bar. He is wearing his apron around his waist. He is pouring a pint of beer for a woman standing at the bar.

She is wearing a dress and the jacket she wore to the place where she works. She is wearing glasses.

She looks tired.

Someone comes into the bar. Nicolas looks up from pouring the beer. He sees Emile. Emile is walking towards the bar. He is undoing the buttons on his jacket.

Nicolas and Emile nod to each other. Emile takes his cap off. It is cold outside. Nicolas finishes pouring the beer. He puts the glass on the bar.

The woman puts some money on the bar. Nicolas takes the money. He puts it in the cash register behind the bar. She takes the glass of beer. She walks away from the bar.

Emile sits at the bar. He sits with his hands in his lap. Nicolas comes over to him. Nicolas says: ‘Is it over already?'

Nicolas could not go to the theatre because he is working at the bar.

Emile says: ‘Probably not.'

Nicolas frowns. He says: ‘How did it go?'

Emile shrugs. He says: ‘It was good.'

Nicolas makes a gin and tonic for Emile. He puts it on the bar. It is in front of Emile. Emile reaches to take some money out of his pocket. Nicolas moves his hand to say that he does not have to.

Emile puts his hands on the bar. He moves the gin and tonic closer to him. He smiles at Nicolas.