It's in the Rhythm (22 page)

“I don't understand either.”

Ginger frowned. “What do you mean?”

Tamara sat on the bed again. “When I saw Brian the other night, I felt old feelings that I thought were dead. It's confusing.”

“You still love Brian. There's nothing confusing about that. It took this separation to make you realize it. Are you in love with Nina?” Ginger wasn't sure she wanted to know the answer, but she had to ask.

Clasping her hands in her lap, Tamara said, “I thought I was.”

“Now you're sure,” Ginger said.

“I'm not sure of anything anymore.”

“Look who's here,” Garrett said as he stuck his head inside the room.

Tamara managed a smile. “How did you know I was here?” He moved further into the room and gave her a hug.

“Dad told me. He said you might be staying a while.”

“Only until I can figure some things out.” She pointed at Garrett. “And he still doesn't know about Nina.”

“What about Brian?” Garrett inquired.

Tamara bobbed her head up and down. “I told him everything the other night.”

Garrett could only imagine how Brian took the news. “What happened?” he prompted.

Tamara didn't respond.

Ginger walked over, placing her arms around Tamara's shoulders for comfort. “He threatened to take Taj,” she said, answering for her daughter.

“Where's Taj?” Garrett asked.

“Brian took him home earlier,” Ginger said.

“Do you think Brian is serious?” Garrett asked.

“I don't know,” Tamara said. “He sounded serious. He was upset. All I know is I can't lose my son.”

“I don't think Brian will go through with it,” Garrett said. “Like you said, he's just upset right now. Once he cools down, the two of you will sit down and work this out.”

Tamara seemed to accept the answer. “You're right.”

“What about Nina?” Ginger asked.

“What about her?” Garrett asked.

“Does she know you're here?” Ginger asked.

Tamara placed a hand to a throbbing forehead. “No. I left this morning and I haven't spoken to her since. I'm not concerned about her right now.”

“You should call her and let her know you will be staying with your family for a while,” Garrett said, worried Nina might show up and cause a scene. “The last thing we need is for her to show up and cause trouble.”

“Don't worry. Nina isn't going to show up here. I will phone her when I'm ready,” Tamara explained. “I, uh, just need more time.”

Garrett reached out, touching her hand. “You know what's best.” He stood. “We will talk about it more when I return.”

“Return?” Ginger asked. “Where are you going?”

“I'm flying to California to see Imani.”

“Wait a minute,” Ginger frowned. “I thought she was in town.”

“She was. She left a couple of days ago. It's a long story.”

Tamara pepped up. “Is everything okay between you two, or is there trouble in paradise?”

Garrett had to chuckle. It was good to hear some lightness in his sister's voice. “We broke up.”

“Then why are you going to see her?” his mother asked.

“I need to put this relationship behind me for good so that Trinity and I can move forward.”

“Trinity?” Mother and daughter spoke in unison.

“It's about time,” Tamara joked.

“I see things have changed,” Ginger said to Garrett's retreating figure.

“For the better,” Garrett threw over his shoulder.

* * *

The next morning Tamara removed the dishes from the dishwasher and put them away. She yawned. Sleep last night was futile. She tossed and turned until she finally dozed off around three, only to rise at seven.

“Good morning,” she said as Garrett strolled into the kitchen and put his bag down in the doorway. “Are you ready to go?”

“Yeah.” He grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl on the counter. “My plane leaves at twelve-thirty. I figure if I leave two hours early, the flight may leave on time.”

“Good luck.”

“Tell me about it.” Garrett stared at her. “How are you this morning?”

“I'm okay. Don't worry about me. You have problems of your own.”

“Is that your way of saying you don't want to talk about it?” Garrett bit into the apple. “Say no more. I'm gone.” He threw the remainder of the fruit into the trashcan. Picking up his bag, he waved to Tamara and was out the door.

Several hours later, Tamara found herself winding down from a busy morning of doing house chores. She sat on the sofa, flipping through the pages of
Ebony Magazine
when the doorbell rang. She opened the door to an expressionless white man she didn't recognize. Her first thought was to close the door in his face, but she reconsidered when he called her by her full legal name.

“Are you Tamara Kaye Mitchell?” he asked.

“Yes,” she said hesitantly.

The stranger removed a white envelope from a black binder and handed it to her. “You have been served.” Without another word, he walked off.

Tamara stood immobile. She watched as the man got into his vehicle and drove off. She took a couple of deep breaths. With trembling hands, she opened the envelope and unfolded the papers.

Brian was divorcing her.

* * *

Garrett stepped off the plane to find Imani waiting to pick him up from the airport. As soon as he settled in the passenger seat of the BMW, the discussion picked up where they left off on the phone.

“So what do you have to say that you couldn't tell me on the phone?”

Imani gripped the steering wheel. “Do you love her?”

Garrett froze. “Let's keep her out of this.”

Imani threw him a hard look. “She's the reason for all of our problems.”

“No, she isn't. Why can't you see that? We just weren't meant to be.”

“Well, we're going to have to find a way to make it work,” she mumbled.

Garrett strained to hear what was said. “What did you say?”

Imani sighed. “I said we have to find a way to get along.”

“I wanted the relationship to end on good terms. Just because it didn't work out doesn't mean we can't be friends.”

Imani cleared her throat. She gave him a quick glance before looking back at the road. “We will be more than friends.”

Garrett laid his head back against the headrest. He was losing patience. He should have stayed in Maryland. How many ways could he say it was over?

“Imani…”

“I'm pregnant,” she blurted out, her eyes straight ahead.

Garrett's head snapped in her direction. It felt like a ton of bricks fell on him. He was speechless. The only sound was the movement of traffic. He lowered his head, rubbing his forehead in denial. “It can't be,” he said to himself. Deep down he knew it was very possible. Several times they weren't as careful as they should have been. But more than that, he knew his future with Trinity just went out the window.

Chapter 16

“How far along are you?” Garrett was walking back and forth in front of her like a caged animal, trying to absorb the news.

Imani's brown eyes followed his movement. “About six weeks.”

“Why are you just telling me?”

“The doctor just confirmed it.”

He was still pacing. “How do I know the baby is mine?”

Imani covered the small space between them. “How dare you ask me something like that!”

Garrett stopped in mid-stride. ‘We have been off and on the past couple of months. You know that.”

Not offering an answer, she stomped off to the bedroom. Garrett was right behind her.

“Talk to me, Imani.”

Imani swirled around to face him. “This baby is yours. You are the only man I have been seeing for the past couple of months.” She was on the verge of tears.

Garrett didn't mean to make her cry. The news caught him off guard. He wasn't ready to be a father, especially not with Imani. This is where his father would say he had brought the situation upon himself.

“What are you going to do?” Garrett asked.

“What do you mean, what am I going to do? I'm going to have this baby.” She placed a hand on her still-flat stomach. “It's a part of you and me. Us.” Imani's face fell when he didn't respond right away. “I'm not going to raise this baby alone.”

“You won't have to,” Garrett finally said. “I will take care of my responsibility.”

“What about me?” Imani snapped. “You don't seem too happy about the baby.”

“What do you want me to do, Imani?”

Taking a deep breath, she stood in front of Garrett. Leaning forward, she pressed her lips to his. Then, with hope in her eyes, she met his gaze.

“Marry me, Garrett.”

* * *

Tamara phoned Brian at work and begged him to see her. He finally agreed.

“I didn't mean to hurt you, Brian.”

“It's too late, Tamara.”

“I'm not begging, Brian. I understand why you filed for divorce.”

It was hard for Brian to look at his wife. When he saw her, he didn't feel hate; he felt love. Every time he was in her presence, he felt it a little more strongly.

“Get to the point, Tamara.”

“It's about Taj.”

“What about him?”

“I want joint custody.”

“We have already talked about Taj. You didn't have a snowball's chance in hell before I found out about your alternative lifestyle, and you don't now.”

“You are being unfair, Brian.”

Brian cast her a look that cut her in half. She took a step back. He pointed a finger in her face. “You are the last person to be talking to me about fairness.” He threw his hands up in surrender. “I can't stand to look at you.”

Tamara began to sob lightly. “Don't say that, Brian.”

He wanted to reach out and take her in his arms to comfort her, but he couldn't bring himself to do so. “Tamara,” he said, his voice softening a little. “Baby, you hurt me.” He placed a hand on his chest. “How could you do this to me? And with a woman? Why didn't you tell me you were into women?”

“I didn't know for sure,” she sniffed. “It's something I have wrestled with since high school. I still don't know what I'm feeling.”

“What was I?” He stepped toward her. She stepped back again. “An experiment?”

Her eyes locked with his. “No, Brian, you were the man I fell in love with. I enjoyed being with you.”

Brian scowled. “Are you saying you're bisexual? You enjoy being with men and women? How many women have you been with?”

Tamara folded her arms across her chest. “Nina was my first,” she said, her voice shaky.

Brian shook his head in disbelief. “Since you told me, I have been going over and over in my mind trying to figure out what I did wrong. What have I done to deserve this?” He pulled out the chair from the dining room table and sat down. He looked like a man defeated.

Tamara kneeled down in front of him. Looking into his eyes, she could see the love in them. “Brian, you did nothing wrong. Don't blame yourself.” She grasped his large, strong hand. “You are a good man. It was me who took your love for granted. I admit it. When we married, we knew there would be good and bad times.”

“I never dreamed this,” Brian replied.

“These are the bad times,” she said.

Brian rolled his eyes. “This is too much for me to deal with. Having an affair with a woman. I can't accept it.”

“Would it have made a difference if it were a man?”

Brian looked at her like she'd lost her mind. “Not having an affair would have been the right thing to do. Man or woman, you committed adultery, and the Bible says that is grounds for divorce.”

“Forgive me, Brian.”

“I'm not ready to forgive you,” he said in a firm tone.

She couldn't hide the look of disappointment on her face. “I guess it's going to take time.”

“A lifetime.” He was bitter, but she understood.

She raised her chin in defiance. “I'm entitled to joint custody. Don't take that away from me.”

Brian didn't miss a beat. “No. You lost that right when you walked out.”

“What I did doesn't change the love I have for Taj.”

“Then you have to make a choice. Your lover or your son.”

* * *

“Are you going to marry her?”

Garrett refused to look his mother in the eye. He feared what she may be thinking of him. He left Los Angeles without giving Imani an answer to her proposal. He momentarily closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath. Since arriving home he'd been unable to think of anything else.
How could you have gotten yourself in this mess?
he thought.

“I don't know.” The look on Ginger's face reminded him of the disappointment he saw when Tamara was in the situation. “I'm sorry mother.” He laid his head in her lap as they sat on the sofa. “I should have been more careful.”

“It's too late to think about that now. Taking care of the child is what you need think about.”

Garrett sat up straight. “If the child is mine, I will take care of my responsibility.” Surprise widened her eyes at the comment. He expected more of an outburst. “That all you have to say?”

“What else do you want me to say? You're a grown man. No one knows the consequences of their actions better than you do,” she lightly scolded him. “And what do you mean
if
the baby is yours?”

“We were not exclusive.”

“Lord, have mercy.” She shook her head in disbelief. “She seemed like a nice girl.”

“Imani is nice. She's smart. Intelligent.”

Ginger narrowed her eyes at him. “But you don't want to marry her?”

Garrett knew what his mother meant. “No.”

Ginger rose from the sofa. “It's your decision. I know you will do what's best,” she said.

“I don't know what to tell Trinity.”

“Just tell her the truth.”

“I could lose her. She's not going to be with a man with a baby on the way.”

“You play, you pay. And that's not scripture, that's Mama,” Ginger said, heading toward the stairs. “I warned you to be careful,” she said over her shoulder.

Garrett hung his head. The words were true. He plucked the cellular phone off his waistband and dialed Trinity's number. Waiting for her to answer, he thought about what he was going to say, and how she may react to the news. It wasn't a good feeling. She answered on the fourth ring.

“Hello.”

“Hi,” Garrett spoke.

“Hi yourself.” He could feel her smiling through the phone. “Where are you?” Are you back?”

“Yeah. I'm back home,” he answered. “I made it back a couple of hours ago.”

“That was a quick trip. How did it go? Did you get everything worked out?”

Garrett closed his eyes again. He figured once he told her Imani's news their relationship would be over. That was the kind of woman she was. She believed in family values.

“Garrett?” He heard her say. “Is everything all right?”

“Uh, Trinity. We need to talk.”

Trinity could hear trouble in his voice. “Garrett, what is it?”

“I don't want to go into it over the phone. I'm on my way. We will talk about it. See you soon.”

Click.

* * *

Thirty minutes later, Trinity opened the door to a worried-looking Garrett. From the expression on his face, she could tell she wasn't going to like what he had to tell her. He strolled past her, standing in the middle of the floor. Turning to face her, his gaze traveled up and down her body. He managed a smile.

“You are truly beautiful to me, Trinity. I have been in love with you since I first laid eyes on you.”

Trinity was caught off guard by his revelation. She figured what he had to say was serious. Garrett was trying to let her down easy. A shudder of disappointment ran through her. A lump formed in her throat. “What is it, Garrett? It must be serious.”

Garrett looked off. He didn't respond.

“Did you make up with Imani?” she asked in a low tone.

“It's nothing like that.”

“Then what is it?”

“She's pregnant.”

Trinity's mouth dropped open. She felt as if the ground had opened up and swallowed her. She wanted to speak, but the words didn't come.

“She's about a month along,” Garrett said, his voice choked.

“Garrett? How?” Trinity finally asked, then realized it was a foolish question. “I know how, but how could you let it happen?”

“It just happened.”

“It just happened,” she repeated. She was trying her best to hold on to her anger. Disappointment was pushing through her body. She couldn't believe how careless he'd been. “What is she going to do?”

“She says she's going to have the baby. She wants me to marry her.”

Trinity's feet were rooted to the floor. “What do you want?” The question left her lips, but she didn't really want to know the answer. She'd fallen in love with Garrett, and the thought of him starting a family with Imani was killing her inside. She knew he was an honorable man. Even if he didn't love Imani, he'd do the right thing by her. His parents raised him that way. But it didn't make it easy to accept.

He shrugged. “I haven't decided.”

“Oh,” she said. “There's only one thing you can do.” She couldn't believe she said it.

Garrett took her by the hand. Reaching out he grabbed her hand. His touch felt so warm.

“Trinity, I'm sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen. I love you. I need you. The Lord knows I don't want to lose you.”

Trinity reached out, placing a finger to his lips. Her heart was cracking into a million pieces. “Maybe it just wasn't meant to be.”

Garrett shook his head vigorously. “Don't say that. I haven't agreed to marry her.”

“You're not that kind of man. Your parents didn't raise you that way. They would want you to do the right thing.”

“I don't love her, Trinity,” he pleaded. “I love you, I want to be with you.” Taking her hand, he gently placed it to his chest. “My heart beats for you, and only you.”

Looking into his eyes, Trinity could see the love. It was deep, but she wouldn't be able to forgive herself if she didn't allow him to do the right thing. “What about the child, Garrett? A child needs its father. Can you forgive yourself if you don't do the right thing by Imani?”

“Is the right thing to marry her, knowing I'm in love with someone else?”

“There's a child involved now. It's not about us anymore.” She turned her back on him.

He turned her around to face him. “This is about us.” Pulling her close, he embraced her.

“Garrett, let's not do this.”

He held her tighter. “Do what?”

Trinity stepped out of his arms. “You're making this hard to do. We both know what has to be done.”

“Trinity, please.”

She held up a hand, waving off any further words from him. “Don't, Garrett. Just go.”

Garrett's heart dropped into his stomach. “You don't mean that.”

Trinity turned back to him again. She wrapped her arms around her to head off the chill she was feeling, and she didn't want him to see her cry.

“I do mean that, Garrett.”

Garrett came up behind her, attempting to turn her around to face him. “Tell me that to my face.”

She removed his hand. “Don't, Garrett, please. If you love me, you will go.”

Trinity heard him sigh deeply. She didn't have the strength to turn around. When she heard the door close, she dropped to her knees and rocked back and forth, her body wracked with tears.

* * *

Trinity awoke the next morning at five-fifteen. She didn't remember dozing off. She was still fully dressed. It wasn't a dream. Garrett had told her he was going to be a father. Curling in the fetal position, she quietly sobbed again. Her mind wandered to the choir. How was she going to work with him? She'd given her word, she couldn't back out now. The Gospel Explosion was next week.

Flipping on her back, she reached over and picked up the phone. She dialed her father's number. She hadn't seen or spoken to him in the last couple of days. Not getting an answer, his voice mail clicked on. She left a quick message for him to return her call. He was probably out with Gail. Their relationship was going well. She was happy for him. Hanging up, she entered Leigh's number. After three rings, she picked up.

“Leigh,” she croaked.

“Trinity? You sound awful.”

Trinity put a hand to her forehead. “I feel awful,” she sniffed. “Can you come over? I…I really need to talk.”

“Sure. I'll be right over.”

Replacing the phone, Trinity headed into the bathroom. Turning on the shower, she removed her clothing. Ten minutes later, she dried off. After rubbing lotion all over her body, she slipped into a pair of jeans and an American University sweatshirt. She slid her feet into a pair of sandals as the doorbell rang. She opened the door and Leigh strolled in past her.