Jace (31 page)

Had she been telegraphing her thoughts? Please let the answer be no. She didn’t want to burden Jace with that. One of them having to deal with those memories was enough. “I promised Faith, Jace. When he was taking her away, I promised her that I wouldn’t say those words again until—” Her breath broke on a sob. “I didn’t realize how unfair it was going to be to you when I promised. You have every right to expect—”

His thumb covered her lips, pressing inward, cutting off the frantic flow of words. His eyes were very dark as they met hers, vampire fire glowing at the edges.

“You keep your promise to our daughter, Miri. You keep it until I put her in your arms and then you can tell us both what you need to.” The pressure on her lips eased. His thumb stroked in a soft feathering from one side of her mouth to the other. “This is enough for me.”

This was his mouth melding with hers. This was the thrust of his tongue that demanded the parting of her lips. This was the claiming of her mouth that commanded her obedience. The fire returned, burning through her tears, her resistance, finding her confidence, launching it forward.

Yes, for now this was enough, but soon they’d have more. Soon they’d have their daughter and their love. Miri braced her hands on Jace’s chest and levered herself a hairbreadth away. “I will give you more someday.”

The flames in his eyes leapt higher; his energy seethed. “How about you just give me what I want right now?”

She snuggled her chest to his. He was all hard angles and planes that complimented her curves perfectly. “What’s that?”

His hands cruised over her shoulder blades, traced their way down the hollow of her spine and then back up over the swell of her hips before gripping hard. “Your mark. Mark me as I take you, princess, and I guarantee I’ll be a happy man.”

He was willing to settle for so little.

Guess that all depends on your perspective.

He’d caught her thought. Emotions foreign and strong, distinctly masculine, swirled over hers in a heavy wave, leaving her floundering until out of the midst came a hunger that threaded them in one powerful projection. Her leaning above him, her body appearing incredibly lush and feminine as it curved over his, the silken caress of her hair brushing his skin as the molten heat of her sheath teased the tip of his cock with the same deliberateness with which her teeth teased his skin. Pleasure surged; anticipation heightened.

“You want my bite,” she whispered, feminine power skipping along her nerve endings in a thrill of delight at the realization of how much he wanted her.

He brought her down to whisper in her ear. “I want your mark.”

“Here?” she asked, skimming her hand along the strong column of his neck.

His growl drew a grin and more of that feminine power from deep within. “You know where.”

She traced his collarbone. “Here?”

He centered his shaft with a shift of his hips and it was her turn to gasp. He was deliciously thick and her muscles tightened. His grin was knowing. “It’s not nice to tease the vampire.”

She drew little circles on his chest, working her way down to his flat nipples. “It might not be nice…” She gave one a little pinch. “But it definitely is fun.”

With a half laugh, half growl, he flipped her over, coming down over her in a big dark threat, realigning himself against her with a smooth efficiency that brought everything female in her to fevered attention.

“I’ll show you fun,” he snarled in a voice that should have terrified her, but instead brought out her wild side. His fangs nipped at her jaw, her earlobe. She arched into the shivery sensations until they became too much. And then she tried to curl away, but there wasn’t any place to go. The mattress was at her back and the rest of her was surrounded by vampire. Her very intense, very passionate, incredibly loving vampire.

Jace.

He kissed the pulse in her throat, his fangs delicately scraping the tender skin over her jugular. She arched her head back, wanting to give him everything. Needing to.

Her canines throbbed with the rhythm of desire. His scent enfolded her, beckoned her. Her muscles parted as he pressed down, entering her that first bit. She closed her eyes and struggled with the differences between them, as always her first instinct to brace herself.

“No, baby, just relax. You know I won’t hurt you. Just go all soft and sweet for me, and let me make you feel good.”

Good.
The word sank through the haze of erotic enchantment. This had started with her wanting to do something to make him feel good. His arm brushed her cheek. His cock pressed deeper. She moaned as she remembered. A tremor shook her from head to toe with the sheer pleasure of it. He wanted her to mark him. Locking her gaze to his, she curved her fingers into his shoulder, pulling him down.

His energy flared. His lips set in a straight line. “No. You’re not ready.”

She’d passed ready ten minutes ago. “Don’t be such a baby.”

It was probably the shock of being called a baby that dropped him down that crucial inch that enabled her to hook her hand around his neck. After that, it was just a matter of taking advantage of his nature. As soon as she tugged, he pulled back, giving her the resistance she needed to draw herself up. Her lips brushed the hair-roughened skin above his pectoral. He froze. She touched the salty expanse with her tongue, preparing him. His breath hissed in, between his teeth, as his muscles tensed. His hips jerked, piercing her a tiny bit more. His big hand cupped her skull, pulling her in even as he gave her one last chance. “Miri…”

“Just relax, Jace. You’re going to like this.”

The irises of his eyes were totally consumed with vampire fire. The same fire she wanted licking over her flesh, burning into the center of her being, joining them.

“Too much, that’s the problem.”

“It can never be too much.”

She kissed the spot once, twice, feeling the glands in her mouth swelling in readiness. He cradled her head, supporting her as she lavished upon him the only gift she had to give: herself.

On the third kiss she lingered. He groaned. She bit, tasting the spice of claiming as it spread into the intimate mix of blood, saliva, man, woman. At the same time his body surged into hers, convulsing in ecstasy as she made her claim. His expression went savage, his mood primitive, snarling as he pulled her closer, demanding more. She gave it. While the violent culmination drove everything from his mind except the pleasure of the bite, the joining of their bodies, only one wild thought consumed hers.

Mine.

“THAT
wasn’t quite the way I planned it.”

Nowhere in his imagining of the moment that Miri claimed him had Jace planned on losing control like that.

Her hair whispered against his shoulder as she looked up. “Why? What did I do wrong?”

He touched his finger to the softness of her cheek. “I’m the one who didn’t last long enough to see to your pleasure.”

She tapped the center of the bruise. “I was pleased.”

His breath sucked in as erotic pleasure spilled over him again. His cock hardened as if he hadn’t just come. “I’m sorry.”

He caught her hand before she could pull it free. “You didn’t hurt me.”

“I didn’t…” Those big golden-brown eyes of hers dropped to his groin and then back up. “You’re sensitive.”

From the smile on her lips, he saw she liked that. “Don’t go getting ideas.”

“Why not?”

She wiggled until her other hand was free and then brushed it over her mark. The sensation shot straight to his gut. His muscles clenched and the smile on her lips widened. She hitched herself up and hooked her soft thigh over his. The brush of her lips was heaven and hell. “This makes up for your not being ticklish.”

“I think I’ve unleashed a monster.”

She snuggled back into his shoulder. “In that case you’d better look afraid.”

“I’m vampire, I
am
the monster.”

Instead of teasing, her expression grew serious. “Not to Brenda Lynn.”

“No, not to her.”

“What do you think she meant when she said she’d prayed for someone?”

So she’d been thinking on that, too. “I don’t know, but I intend to find out.”

“Do you think someone’s threatening her?”

“Maybe, or she could just be worried Travis will be coming back. She’s awfully young. She might not understand the concept of death.”

She nestled her cheek into the hollow of his shoulder. “Maybe.”

“He could put quite a scare in a little girl. Especially if he was using her to get her mother’s cooperation in his bed.”

She covered his mark with her palm. “It’s hard to believe an Alpha could behave so to his pack.”

With a hitch of his arm, Jace pulled her in. She’d lost a lot of illusions this year. The hardest might have come last. Pack were as susceptible to failure as vampires and humans. “There’s good and bad everywhere, princess.”

“Well, Travis apparently gathered up more than his fair share.”

“No arguing that.”

The mark burned and itched. The stroke of her fingers soothed the irritation but created another deeper burn. He pulled her up so she draped across his chest. She propped her chin in her hands. The points of her elbows dug into his chest. He hated to kill the hope in her eyes but hiding from the truth wasn’t going to save her. “Not everyone’s going to accept me right off.”

“You’ll win them over.”

“Some of them might never accept me.”

“Then they can leave.”

“Some of them might even have strong opinions about my staying on.”

She frowned down at him. “What are you trying to say?”

“I’m not always going to be able to be the nice guy. There will be challenges. And it won’t be like with the McClarens. These boys could be serious.”

She leaned in. “Will you promise me something?”

He knew what was coming. She had a soft heart. A woman’s heart. And she wanted this pack to like her. Her tempting lips came closer. Full and red, still swollen from his previous attentions. The mark she’d given him burned at the sultry lure of her scent, her heat, her energy; it throbbed with the need to experience the liquid heat of her passion again. “Anything.”

“If anyone challenges you”—she fitted her lips to his, top to bottom, edge to edge—“kick their asses.”

H
E
was going to have to kick some ass. Two hours out from the compound, at the end of another fruitless rumor-chasing search for Faith, standing in a phone booth waiting for Caleb to pick up, watching the sullen-faced weres take up protective positions, Jace felt the gnawing of doubt. What the hell good did it do him to head up a pack of wolves if they couldn’t find what they were hunting for? With every day that passed, Faith was getting farther away. And with every failed mission, the hope he harbored that he could bring their daughter home diminished. Staring into the shiny metal of the phone front, he saw his reflection, felt the weight of his responsibilities. His mind’s eye superimposed the image of his daughter’s face, as Miri had given it to him, over his reflection. Tiny, round, red with fury over her introduction to the world. An introduction he would have had be so different. She had the Johnsons’ square chin, he realized. He reached out, touching the squared bottom of his/her chin, imagining she felt the contact wherever she was. Imagined it gave her comfort. Tried not to hear the cries he couldn’t soothe. He wanted his daughter, damn it. Wanted to hold her and let her feel his love. He couldn’t bear the thought that she didn’t know how much she was loved by her father. That she might grow up not knowing the families she belonged to, who waited to welcome her home. The phone rang with pointless insistence. He pressed against the image. Cool metal greeted his touch rather than petal-soft skin. Her image fell away and he was once again staring at nothing more than his reflection. Jace let his hand drop to his side. His fingers curled into a fist.
I’ll find you, little one.

“No answer?” Brac asked from his left.

Jace blinked, brought back to the present. The phone crooked between his shoulder and ear was still ringing through to Caleb. “Not yet.”

“We don’t have all night.”

They had as long as they needed. The insolence in Brac’s tone was an indirect challenge he was soon going to have to address.

If he needed more proof, if the lip the guards had given him before letting him through the last checkpoint wasn’t sufficient, the assessing looks his two “guides” were giving him now practically begged an ass kicking.

One Jace wasn’t averse to giving. The same restlessness that plagued the weres gnawed at him. He was tired of waiting, tired of everything feeling beyond his control. He might have to wait for Faith, but there was no reason he couldn’t have things out with the Tragallions. If they didn’t make a move soon, he was going to make it for them. Their resentment of his leadership couldn’t be allowed to fester. It needed to come to a head. This needed to be settled. Not only for the pack’s sake, but when he found Faith, he needed the pack unified. Frankly, he’d expected to be jumped way before now, but for some reason the weres were holding back. There was almost an aura of waiting. Shaking his head, Jace turned his back to the wolves. He was beginning to think Miri was right. He didn’t understand weres.

The ringing abruptly stopped. Caleb came on the line. “Hello.”

“Hey, Caleb.”

“Jace?”

“None other.”

“Why aren’t you calling in on your cell?”

“Dead battery.”

“You let the battery run dead?”

He couldn’t blame Caleb for the shock. It wasn’t something he normally did, but Brenda Lynn had brought a new friend around. One of the five children on the compound. The boy had been roughly her age. A cute boy with hair that went every which way. In his hands he’d had a toy car. In his eyes there’d been the conviction Brenda Lynn had given him that Jace, as Alpha, could work miracles. It’d been the kid’s birthday. Three hours later Jace had adapted the charger to run the toy. The kids had been happy. And his cell phone had been living on borrowed time ever since. “There were extenuating circumstances.”

“Damn it, Jace, we have got to get you out of the dark ages. I don’t like you being out of touch.”

“The storm coming in should lay a base for the snowmobiles to get through with the supplies.”

“If it doesn’t, I’m hiring choppers,” Caleb growled.

“This is too dangerous.”

“I don’t care.”

Jace sighed. “I’m fine.”

There was a pause in which Caleb communicated his skepticism eloquently with his silence. Finally he asked, “The Tragallions make their move yet?”

“No.”

“What in hell are they waiting for?”

He wished he knew. “Could be they’re not the hurrying type.”

“And pigs fly.”

There was another silence. Jace could easily picture Caleb running his hand through his hair as frustration ate at him. His brother had a sense of responsibility that didn’t quit and no matter how old Jace got, how mean he proved himself to be, in many ways Caleb couldn’t see him as anything other than his little brother that needed his protection.

He changed the subject. “How’s Joseph doing?”

“He’s holding his own.”

“What exactly does that mean?”

“It means I wouldn’t say he’s thriving.”

Jace didn’t need telepathy to feel his brother’s anguish. He glanced at the weres. They were still standing where he’d left them, no doubt listening. “Damn, I’m sorry. But Slade will figure something out.”

“I know.” Caleb took an audible breath, the only betrayal of the pain he and Allie had to be going through. “How’s Penny doing?”

It seemed wrong to answer with the truth.

“Jace?” Caleb prodded.

“What?”

“Allie and I would kill for good news right now.”

Jace sighed. “She’s thriving.”

“Thank God.” Another pause and then, “Are the Tragallions treating her right?”

“She’s everybody’s darling.”

“Maybe they aren’t all bad.”

No. They weren’t. “They’ve got their good points.”

“I still don’t understand why you didn’t just tell Ian to go to hell. Miri would have been happy with the McClarens.”

Jace wasn’t so sure about that. Lately he’d sensed the same need for challenge in Miri that prowled in him. The McClarens were safe and settled. Life there would have been as routine for her as it was for him. He would have been getting itchy feet within a month. He had the sense she would have, too. The current situation with all its ups and downs suited both of them much better. Somehow, Ian had known that.

“What can I say, the man is a shrewd negotiator.”

JACE
made it home just before dawn. He paused outside the door and glanced at the weres.

“Sure you boys don’t have something you want to get off your chests?”

Wind blew as the two men looked at each other. Jace glanced up at the dark sky. The storm was coming. It was going to be a big one, big enough to solve a lot of their issues. He could feel it in his bones. He was even looking forward to it.

The more vocal of the men smiled, showing even white teeth and sharp canines. “Maybe another time.”

Jace nodded and opened the door. “I’ll look forward to it.”

It wasn’t a lie. His temper was fraying under the stress of waiting. He wanted to do something besides run in circles chasing his tail. He wanted his child. He wanted to move on to the future without the past dragging him down. He wanted normal. Jace entered the house and closed the door, breathing in the welcoming scents of home. Wood polish, Miri, and charred steak. The latter brought a smile to his lips. Miri must have lost another battle with the woodstove.

He found her in the kitchen, over a paper plate on the floor, cutting away on one very black on the outside, very rare on the inside steak with a plastic knife and fork. She wasn’t making a lot of headway. She looked up as he came in the room and smiled a welcome while her eyes coursed over him from head to toe, looking for signs of injury.

He motioned to the plate and plastic utensils. “That looks like a challenge.”

“It is.”

“So why are you smiling?”

“Brac’s mother sent over some sheets and blankets.”

“And this makes cutting a steak with plastic utensils easier how?”

“It doesn’t help a bit.”

“But you’re still smiling.”

“It was a peace offering.”

“Maybe she was just appeasing a guilty conscience.”

Miri raised her eyebrows. “You so do not understand weres.”

“So I’m beginning to believe.”

He took off his Stetson and sat down beside her, putting his hat on the floor. Leaning back against the wall as she sawed through the last bit of fat, he rested his hand on his knee. She offered him the piece she finally succeeded in cutting off.

“No, thanks. I had a snack when I was out.”

She wrinkled her nose at him, staring at his face as if checking for confirmation that he’d fed.

“My momma taught me how to use a napkin, you know.”

For two heartbeats she didn’t get his meaning. “That’s gross.”

He pointed at the meat. “When I’m done eating, my meal gets up and goes about its way. Yours has to cock up its toes. You tell me which is grosser.”

She didn’t bat an eyelash. “Yours.”

Putting his arm around her shoulder he tugged her across the distance between them and smiled. “Uh-huh.”

It must have been as strained as it felt because she set the plate on the floor and scooted along, with his encouragement, until she was all but sitting in his lap. The scent of her shampoo drifted up. Wholesome and sweet, a cleansing balm for the sickness of his fear. When her cheek touched his shoulder he confessed, “It was a dead end, princess.”

She nodded. “I know.”

He guessed his coming back empty-handed made that clear. “I will find her, though.”

There was no condemnation in the stroke of her hands down his chest.

“I know that, too,” she whispered, nothing but trust in her gaze.

Shit. He didn’t deserve it. He rested his head against the wall and closed his eyes, weariness dragging at him. There was no guarantee he could deliver Faith to her. Despite his best intentions his promise might just turn out to be so much hot air.

Paper slid across linoleum. “Your promises are gold.”

Shit again. He’d projected. “You’re getting good at reading minds.”

Denim rustled as she came up on her knees. His senses flared to absorb the heat of her body as it rose along his. Nerve endings strained for the culmination of anticipation. It came in the brush of her lips against his neck. The shiver then snaked down his spine and lodged in his soul.

“No. Just yours.”

He cracked an eyelid. She was staring at him with all the conviction she felt inside shining from her eyes. It was a hell of a lot. Her hands settled on his shoulders, hesitantly, as if she debated, and then firmed as she came to a decision.

“My feelings for you don’t hinge on whether we find Faith tomorrow or ten years from tomorrow, Jace.”

She didn’t have to tell him that. “I know. Mating’s not a choice.”

Miri shook her head, her hair tumbling about that piquant face he loved so much, casting her eyes in shadow, but nothing could disguise the emotion within. That blazed out at him. Not with the frantic energy that he expected, but with a calm certainty. “When I said that, it was a cop-out.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Her hand connected with his shoulder in a small slap. “I gave you my mark, Jace Johnson, because you’re the only man who could wear it. I gave you my heart because there’s no other man I would—I
could
—trust it to.”

He didn’t know what to do with his hands, what to do with the storm of emotion her statement created in him. He settled for cupping her face in his right hand and her shoulder in his left. “You’ve got lousy taste in men.”

If anything, her expression grew softer. “I guess it’s up to you then to improve it.”

“Like hell. If you’re insane enough to think I’m the shine on your Sunday best, then I’m keeping you crazy.”

“You do that, and I’ll keep you from taking on too much responsibility.”

A tilt of her head to the side and her mouth was at the perfect angle for his kiss.

“I’m sorry about Faith.”

It just slipped out. Against his will, a confession for the guilt gnawing him alive, an outlet for the grief he struggled to contain.

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“If I had stayed with you—”

She put her hand over his mouth, stemming the flow of words, tears welling in her eyes. “You wouldn’t be the man you are, and nothing would have changed. I was betrayed, Jace. There’s no preparing for betrayal.”

She would know. The emotion grew as her tears welled. He’d failed her, brought this upon them. If he’d just asked questions, found out what mattered to her. If he only hadn’t assumed he knew best. Pain and understanding flowed in the wake of the what-ifs, filling the space between them. A space for three that only held two. It was so easy to imagine Faith in Miri’s arms. So easy to picture wrapping his arms around them both, smiles gracing the moment instead of the heartbreak of tears. Easy and impossible at the same time. Goddamn, he wanted his daughter.

Miri’s lips brushed his, then lingered in a kiss that shared so much more than passion. Her arms came around his shoulders, slender and fragile, but so strong in ways that had nothing to do with muscle. “We’re in this together.” There was nothing he could do but pull her closer as her energy slid along his, finding the pockets of grief, sheltering them in the grace of comfort. He wanted to pull her beneath into his skin, soak in her comfort. “Our little girl is missing. No matter how much you pretend, I’ll always know you hurt. Hiding it doesn’t help either of us.”

The simple statement, laced with truth, made him want to do nothing more than absorb her into the shelter of his body where nothing could ever hurt her. His fingers fisted in her hair as he struggled with control. Nothing was supposed to hurt either Miri or Faith, yet both had suffered. “Showing it doesn’t help.”

The little hesitation the words evoked was reminiscent of the one she’d made all those months ago when he’d told her he was going on a mission.

It was simple to tug her face up. Not so simple to decipher her carefully blank expression. “Talk to me, princess.”

“If you don’t share with me, I’m all alone in my pain. And it hurts so badly, Jace.”