Jenna's Consent (4 page)

To her complete astonishment, when she blinked a tear fell onto
her cheek and rolled toward her jaw.

His attention flashed to it and back up to her eyes. His
grip loosened on her hair and he simply wiped the moisture away with his thumb,
and then continued talking as if it hadn’t happened.

“I have a late meeting with the head of security tonight
right when the club closes at two. You will meet me in my playroom at three.
That should give us both enough time to get our shit taken care of so we can
talk.” He glanced around the bar and several people tucked their heads or ran
hands through their hair, as if anyone believed they weren’t eavesdropping. “We
need to continue this in private.”

Compartmentalization was something she excelled at, so she
shoved all her fears into a big box in her head labeled
Fuck It
. She’d been
curious about the new security company for months. The twins had hired someone
who came highly recommended and she was glad the mystery of the new guy was
soon to be put to rest.

Nick’s voice rumbled through her, into her. He drew her
attention back to him. Especially where he’d shoved his thigh between her legs,
rubbing her pussy.

How had she missed that?

“Who’s the new guy? I know Jared and Chris hired some bigwig
to come in and protect this place but they’re being really secretive about it.”

Casanova shrugged, acting like he wasn’t forcing her to hump
his leg for the world to see. “I don’t know much about him yet. Bryan something
or other. This will be our first official meet and greet. Seems thorough. A bit
standoffish but that seems to be modus operandi in most cases. He came highly
recommended by several people. One person C and J really respect in the
lifestyle.”

Abruptly his eyes changed as he stared down at her again.
“Tonight, after work, you and I are going to sit down so we can go over the rules.”

Her heart ping-ponged down to her stomach after he said the
words she knew were coming. Dread filled her. She could kiss the Olympic-size
orgasm she’d been fantasizing about for the last few weeks goodbye.

“Being honest, Jenna, it’s the only way this is going to
work.”

Nothing could have made her heart sink faster, since it was
the one thing she couldn’t ever do. Not ever again. She’d learned her lesson
with Ian.

He’d etched it into her skull. What she wanted was dirty.

But she liked dirty. She wanted to be used and objectified.
Over the years instead of turning a ménage into something to shy away from, his
rejection had had the opposite effect.

Being fucked by two men, two dominant men at the same time,
had remained her most desired fantasy. But it wasn’t a simply fantasy anymore.
The need for it crawled through her brain all the time, especially since The
Library had a knack of bringing in poly relationships.

Therein lay the rub.

For other people it was fine. More than fine but for her it
was different.

It could never work out because of Ian.

Nick glanced across the bar, tilting his head at someone.

He released her hands. Then stood and rubbed her arms. She
didn’t think he did it because she needed it. Instead he touched her simply
because he could.

“Three. In my playroom.”

Words had failed her several realizations ago, so she simply
inclined her head at him.

She was a sub that wanted, needed to please her Sir. A
dominant man capable of great harm if he didn’t know what he was doing. Someone
that had her actual life in his hands, depending on how severe the scenes
became. These were men who were possessive and didn’t share well with others.
Men who wanted to put a collar around a woman’s neck the moment she said yes,
and then everything she wanted evaporated with the first strike of his whip.

She loved that about them and hated that about them.

An invisible mask settled across her face again without much
effort. It was her second skin. She was rarely without it anymore and Nick was
no different.

He talked a good game, said all the right things now but
that would change.

Honesty.

Sounded great and open and super-duper.

The problem?

What she wanted—needed—was to be shared.

And she would never let him know that.

She’d been a sub without someone to truly serve for years.

An orphan.

All of her family was dead and buried alongside her heart.

She had friends. Great ones. Three of them were crowded at a
table not twenty feet away. Looked as if they were chomping at the bit to come
to her rescue but they knew her well enough to know she didn’t need a
knight—nor maidens—in shining armor.

She could flirt with them and have sex with them. Could
cuddle and talk ’til four in the morning…

But they weren’t enough anymore.

Nor was one man.

One man would never be enough.

For thirty days it would have to be and hopefully she could
fuck Nick Love out of her system.

He’d crawled under her façade, flirting, touching and
dancing around their attraction for weeks. She had an itch that needed to be
scratched.

Nothing more.

And the dreams of Ian tying her? Well they could just take a
flying leap for all she cared.

Rope.

Energy sizzled between them at the mere thought of Nick
tying her. His hands on her. Binding her. Seducing her with his control, his
pain.

Damn, she wished he tied.

Her muscles relaxed, her pussy wept and she wanted nothing
more than to fall to her knees at his feet and beg him to take her right there.

His gray eyes saw too much.

He took her hand and flipped it over, placing it over the
thick bulge trapped behind his expensive suit. “I’ve had a hard-on for you
since the day I started working here.” He brought his other arm up, leaning his
forearm on the wall next to her head, caging them in to a semi-private square
foot. “I’ve dreamed of feeling your lips on me.” He pressed her hand harder
against his thick cock, then dragged it up past his belt and hard abdomen. He
didn’t stop until her hand rested over his heart. “Tonight can’t fucking pass
fast enough.” He touched his nose to hers and then strode away.

She followed his back, his wide shoulders, as he headed for
the hallway on the opposite side of the bar. Another man stood there waiting
for him. He was probably the new guy but Jenna couldn’t have given a shit.

She caught part of his profile but then Nick turned around
and winked at her and her brain clicked over to “occupied”. Nick rounded the
corner and all of the breath she didn’t know she’d been holding—for like the
last millennium—wheezed out of her.

Gentle hands eased her down and her butt connected with a
chair she didn’t remember seeing before. She leaned sideways and stared at it
for a minute as if it held the secrets to the universe.

But it was just a chair.

She blinked, trying desperately to clear her brain but it
was almost like someone had turned on one of those foggers in her head. The
kind that gets rid of bugs and covers everything else with goo.

She clutched two hands, as they suddenly appeared in her
grasp.

After some extra convincing from her brain she finally
looked up and there were her girls.

There was her best friend, Skye, with her deep-red hair and
uniform of jeans and a funny T-shirt. Jenna had to focus on the words but it
read,
Finding friends with the same mental disorder as you—Priceless
.

The Library’s owners’ submissive, Cyn, stood beside her with
a worried expression. She was dressed like the sexiest librarian ever with a
yellow blouse and a gray skirt that hugged every curve. Long blonde hair in a
ponytail trailed over her shoulder almost to her slim waist.

And the little pixie clutching Jenna’s other hand was
Haleigh, the newest member of their kinky group of girls.

Each stood with her, giving her support when she desperately
needed it.

Jenna was always the voice of reason and encouragement. Even
she couldn’t pull an explanation of what the fuck just happened with Nick out
of her ass.

Cyn was the first to speak. “Pretty sure we need to find a
table and convince Oscar to leave us a few shot glasses and a full bottle of tequila.
Then we can move to one of the rooms downstairs once we get a little bit of
liquor in you.”

“But I have to work,” Jenna very helpfully pointed out even
though she couldn’t remember anything other than the hot feel of Nick’s cock
beneath her hand and that she effectively belonged to him for thirty days.

“No worries. Looks like you have a bit on your mind at the
moment and a hell of a lot you’ve been holding out on us. I’ve cleared your
schedule for the next hour and a half. It’s one of the perks of sleeping with
the owners.” Cyn waggled her eyebrows.

Skye snorted and Haleigh giggled, squeezing Jenna’s hand.

“I’m so fucked,” Jenna admitted.

“About damn time,” Oscar offered as he came out from behind
the bar and handed her a glass of something with a cherry on top.

It looked like pineapple juice and smelled like the punch
bowl at every college party she’d ever been to.

“What’s this?” She eyed it as if it had roofies in it. Damn.
Her libido did not need any help at the moment. They were already going to have
to dry clean the chair after she stood up.

“It’s called The Leg Spreader.”

“No fucking way,” Skye accused as she leaned in closer to
take a look.

Oscar’s smile lit up the room and everyone laughed but
Jenna.

Too bad he batted for the other team. She’d have snagged him
in no time if he’d been straight. She took a sip and the alcohol hit her like a
one-two punch.

“Good, huh?” he asked but he already knew it was. That man
was a genius behind the bar.

“Mmmmm,” was all Jenna got out as she took a larger sip.

“Strike the tequila bottle,” Cyn told him as she tugged
Jenna up and headed her toward a booth in the back. “One for each of us, my
lovely friend. We’ll put the name of the drink to the test and see if it can
live up to our…expectations, by the time the sun comes up.”

“I said yes to Nick. I said yes to him. To Nick.” The
reality of the situation she now found herself bound and gagged in came
crashing down on her head. “I don’t even know where to start with explaining
all of this.”

Skye laughed behind her, walking arm in arm with Haleigh.
“The drink’s guaranteed to work for Jenna tonight.”

All of the girls laughed and Jenna smirked, thinking it
would be mighty funny if it were happening to anybody other than herself. She
took another drink as they all settled into the open booth. “Bitches.”

Haleigh batted her sweet little eyelashes at her. “Yes but
we’re your bitches. Doesn’t that make a difference?”

Jenna stared at her. Haleigh was normally the quiet one of
the bunch. Never cussed before she starting coming to The Library and her men
corrupted her in the most delicious ways possible. Amazing how things changed
when she finally found two men to love her and fuck her on a
semi-around-the-clock basis. “You have a potty mouth, sweet Haleigh.”

The girl who had been scared of her own shadow the first
time she’d walked into Jenna’s prep room winked at her. “I learned from the
best.”

“But that’s just it.” She leaned forward, as much as her
steel-boned corset would allow, whispering to the women she called family. “I’m
a fraud, a phony. I tell people all the time to take the bull by the horns, but
it’s nothing more than just a plain stupid phrase. I followed my own advice and
I’m full of shit. This was a bad idea. I—”

“Calm, honey. Take a breath.” Cyn rubbed her back and
thankfully Oscar arrived bearing glasses filled with liquid horny for the rest
of them.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be calm again.” She took another
sip and tried to take Cyn’s advice. Melodramatic wasn’t her style. She flirted
and winked at everyone, hiding what she was and what she needed so desperately.

Fuck
.

Three weeks without restful sleep had turned on the faucet
of her fears and she couldn’t get the bastard to turn back off.

“Finish your drink and we’ll make small talk about nothing
in particular. Afterward we’ll head down to one of the playrooms you had on
your list you needed to set for tonight. We’ll help and you can get some stuff
off your chest.”

Jenna looked at Skye, who was surprisingly subdued. She
glanced at the other two girls and then back to Skye.

“You never talk about it. Never talk about him. I think you
should. We all love you and want to give you the same strength you gave us when
we were too scared to trust what was inside us.” Skye reached across the table
and took her hand.

Jenna teared up again and closed her eyes.

She took a deep breath and said, “Okay…” Then drained the
rest of her drink.

Jenna hiked up her big-girl panties and pasted on a smile
when the girls had also finished their drinks. She went so far as to wink at
Oscar as they’d left the bar area. He’d narrowed his eyes at her, making her
laugh and feel much more like herself.

She tried to shut off her thoughts and just…be.

As they walked down the hallway to the elevator, the other
women made small talk and caught up on gossip. Info on members who’d been
collared, subs who morphed into switches when the right person or scene
presented itself, and new members cast away the silence as they walked. Jenna
was sincerely thankful for the company.

Kinky people in general were highly gossipy. Jenna
considered it a known fact and took it all in stride. She laughed a couple
times and added her two cents here and there, but mostly just took the time to
put her proverbial shields back up.

By the time they made it downstairs to one of the private
playrooms, the freak-out caused by Nick being too close and way too perceptive
ebbed away from her.

She ran her fingers over the boning of her corset, blowing a
silent breath into the elevator. Determination straightened her spine. She
could handle it and him.

No doubt about the fact that she found Nick attractive, but
that was it. She didn’t have the time or energy for anything else.

She rolled her eyes at herself.

Sheesh
.

She made a note on her mental to-do list to get laid more
often and grinned at the metal door as she swiped her card. After inputting her
password to get inside she pushed the door wide.

“Who’s the room for?” Haleigh asked as she looked around the
open space.

It was a dungeon, plain and simple. Tall, concrete block
walls painted in a matte black, stained concrete floor, bed, sparse furniture
with a more than sinister feel to them, and a toy closet holding all sorts of
naughty things to play with.

“Chris and Jared,” Jenna whispered not wanting whomever was
manning the security booth to pick up on what she said.

“Ooh,” Skye and Haleigh cooed in unison.

“What?” Cyn blurted out, tugging her long blonde ponytail
from base to tip. Her cheeks turned a bit pink but she couldn’t hide her grin.
“But I’m not supposed to play tonight. The guys told me they had some other
things going on and they wouldn’t be up until late.”

Jenna turned to the other girls. “There’s a rolling tray in
the closet with a collection of toys on it. On top should be a folded blue
paper sheet. Can you cover the tray with it and then roll it out next to the
table in the corner?”

Skye saluted her then took Haleigh with her toward the toy
closet in the far corner.

Jenna made sure to face away from the cameras and
half-covered her mouth. “It’s supposed to be a surprise, so you know nothing.”

“Know what? I have no clue what you’re talking about.” She
tried not to smile but failed. “Now I’m horny. I don’t have a clue what they
have planned and I’m all ready to be taken.”

“Lucky men,” Jenna said.

“Lucky me,” Cyn countered with a wink of her own.

Jenna laughed, tugging Cyn into a big hug. “Touché.”

“Cyn, you are so in for it tonight.” Skye’s lilting voice
bounced off the tall ceiling as she and Haleigh rolled the tray out. They left
the closet door open as they moved toward the corner.

Cyn pulled away from Jenna, looking a bit nervous. “What’s
on the tray?”

“Oh my God it’s got—”

“Not another word, Skylar Evangeline Weston.” Jenna pegged
her with a hard stare.

She and Haleigh left the tray then walked back to where the
other two girls stood. “You know you’re the only person I let call me that,
right?”

Jenna kissed her cheek, leaving a big lipstick print on her
fair skin. “You like it.”

“No, I don’t. But somehow I still let you get away with it.”

Jenna stepped over to the block wall where chains dangled
from the ceiling, terminating in black leather wrist cuffs. “You still think
you owe me for your Christmas present. But you don’t.”

“Fuck,” Skye cursed behind her. “I know I still owe you for
that. Seriously. Hottest Christmas present ever.”

Jenna clicked open the hidden panel in the wall, revealing
the controls for the chains holding the cuffs that she needed to test. She
tested each lock before a scene and each piece of equipment being used to make
sure no one got hurt on her watch.

The girls whispered behind her as she lowered the chains
until the cuffs would be at her eye level when she stood back up.

“Why are you whispering?”

It was Haleigh who finally spoke up. “Well, Skye’s a
bit…concerned.”

“About?” Jenna looked over the cuffs, testing the chain at
the same time.

“Because Nick was part of your Christmas present to her,
along with Jackson.” Who she was still with. “She’s worried part of why you’re
so freaked out about Nick is because of what happened between them.”

Jenna turned around so she could see Skye. True worry
reflected back at her. “Sweetie, of course not.” Skye relaxed a bit but Jenna
really wanted to make sure she knew not to worry. “That has nothing to do with
why I’ve said no to Nick for so long.” She almost started in on the reasoning
behind it but decided against it. “Jackson trusted him with you, as did I, or
it never would have taken place. He’s hot, he obviously wanted to fuck you and
you needed to get laid so damn bad. They’re both Doms with a capital
D
.
Please don’t think anything else about it, okay?”

Skye smiled, her eyes seemed a bit far off and Jenna winked
at the other two girls and turned back to the cuffs she really needed to test
before the girls started in on her for—

“So after months and months of you telling Nick no, today,
out of the blue, you told him yes. And by the what-the-fuck look he had on his
face when your conversation started, it was definitely out of the blue.”

Jenna wrinkled her nose at the wall, trying to think of a
way to tell them something so they’d drop it. She just didn’t want to have some
girly heart-to-heart. Her little feelers were still raw and rubbing them again
didn’t sound like a day at the spa.

“Uh-huh. It’s really no big deal, just need to let off some
stream.” She shrugged, knowing how full of shit she sounded but unable to do
anything about it.

The girls shared glances, and she caught them when she
looked over her shoulder. Interestingly they remained silent.

“What?” Jenna asked.

“You just locked your own wrist in that set of cuffs…”

She looked up and yeah, Haleigh was right. She was halfway
to locked and loaded.

Her thighs twitched, her breasts nearly swelled over the top
of the corset on each shallow breath. She was halfway to subspace already just
with Nick’s name being mentioned.

So much for her,
I am an island
and
can
totally handle this without being affected
. Totally.

“Well—fuck.” She smacked her head against the wall,
wondering if she’d forget who she was if she hit it a few more times. Or even
better, forget that there were any men named Nick or Ian. “Double fuck.” Him
too? She whacked her head a couple more times but it didn’t help. “Will one of
you go get the master key out of the closet?”

Skye came up beside her, already reaching for her cuffed
wrist. “One step ahead of you.”

She took her arm down and Skye returned the key to the
closet.

“Now we need to—”

“Oh no, we’re not letting you off the hook that easy.”

“Maybe we should have just locked her other wrist in.”
Haleigh glanced around the room. “There’s a spanking bench. I bet the three of
us could take her. If we get a gag in her mouth fast enough.” She made air
quotes. “We aren’t
technically
violating her consent.”

All of them laughed, since the suggestion came from Haleigh.
They took Jenna over to the king-size bed, everyone took off their shoes and
they sat her in the middle. Skye and Haleigh moved in beside her and Cyn lay on
her stomach across the bottom.

Jenna stared at Haleigh a bit shocked. “Of the three of you,
I would have put money on at least you being on my side.”

Haleigh locked eyes with her. “I know pain and I know
hiding. Putting your head in the sand will only keep your demons away for so
long. It’s not a way to live, Jenna. If existing is all you’re looking for,
then… Yeah, that’s just not good enough for me anymore and it’s not good enough
for any of you either. We might be the fairer sex but we deserve happiness. And
not just fits and starts of it either. Heap-big loads of it.”

“Says the girl who’s been collared by two amazing men.”

Sincere joy radiated from Haleigh’s smile. She touched the
collar around her neck, tearing up at the mere mention of it. After a couple
seconds she put her arm down, brushing Jenna’s thigh.

“Oh shit,” popped out of Jenna’s mouth and she jerked away
from the contact. So much for nonchalance…

“You’re wound tighter than an eight-day clock. You need to
relax in the worst of ways. And you need to talk to us.”

Skye’s cool hand slid under Jenna’s hair, gripping her neck.
Jenna sighed, dropping her head forward. While Skye massaged her neck, Haleigh
took her closest hand and rubbed her fingers and her palm, syphoning away some
of the tension. Cyn pushed Jenna’s knees wide to sit in between them. She ran
lazy fingers up and down the outside and inside of her legs.

Jenna mmmm’d her thanks, pretty certain she was going to
start drooling on herself. Sexual tension hummed in the air between the four of
them, which was a very welcome distraction.

Cyn’s voice permeated the quiet space all around them but
she spoke low so hopefully whoever was manning the command center wouldn’t be
able to hear. “Are you really that nervous to be with Nick? He’s hot, don’t get
me wrong but it’s more than that. I hadn’t seen it before he manhandled you in
the bar. You’re different with him. Can’t believe I’ve never picked up on it
before but it’s definitely there.”

Jenna hid in the curtain of her hair, taking the opportunity
to share a bit without having to blab it all in the light of day, as it were.

“Yes and no. He’s gorgeous and I’ve wanted him forever. I
totally missed the mark on how much he wants to dominate me.” She shook her
head. “I thought I could scratch an itch with him. And maybe I still can, but
Lordy. I’ve never sunk into space so low and or so fast as I did just thinking
about Nick tying me. When the word rope came out of his mouth I seriously
thought I was going to come right then.”

“First off,” Haleigh said as she moved to Jenna’s other
hand. “Is he into that? Rope?”

Jenna shrugged, focusing on the touch of each of her
friends, taking comfort in each of them. “I’m not certain. But his energy was
off-the-charts incredible when he talked about seeing the rope marks on me. I
can feel it now, just thinking about it. Holy shit it was intense. It normally
takes a rope person to really get that connection. I have a rope blog I started
a couple years ago called Aftercare. It’s a lot about safety and the emotional
side of rope and other kinds of bondage. Just my thoughts. The last few posts
I’ve made have been about that connection and how much I miss it. The thought
of having that again, even if just for a short amount of time is intense.” She
wouldn’t say it out loud but fuck. He scared the shit out of her.

Cyn cleared her throat, dragging her nails lightly down the
outside of her thighs. “I know I’m really new to all of this but it’s not
really pain, like whips or a paddle. So how do you sink into subspace with it?
And the blog. Why the hell didn’t you tell us about this before?”

“I’ve been a chickenshit about sharing emotional stuff for a
while. But I want to be better with you girls. You share so much with me and I
want it to be two-sided. I’ll send you guys the link tomorrow so you can check
it out. Maybe you might want to contribute to it? Make a real go of it?”

“Yes.”

“Definitely.”

“Duh.”

Jenna chuckled as they all answered and she relaxed. Telling
them about the blog wasn’t as hard as she’d thought it would be.

“And the rope?” Haleigh prompted. “How is that intense? I’ve
never really seen it before other than the corset you tied on me.”

Jenna gathered her thoughts and tried to put it in a way
they would be able to grasp easily from some kind of shared experience.
“There’s no pain or a hell of a lot of pain, depending on the type of rope
you’re getting, who’s doing the tying and with what. The type of knots can
either relieve pressure or put additional tension on your body. The number of
lines if you’re suspended makes a huge difference. Lower number of lines the
higher the pain because you aren’t spreading the load over a higher surface area.
Duration of time suspended makes it harder to breathe. Blood pools in your
limbs, increasing sensation play.”

Cyn tilted her head. “And you said the kind of rope makes a
difference. How so?”

“Jute is somewhat soft. Especially compared to something
like coconut, which is stiff and scratchy. How long the rope’s been used in
general makes a difference too. The more you use a set of rope the softer it
will become. Truly there’s a laundry list of different things that can change
the energy in the scene. Just like any kink. But it’s the submission of it that
draws you under, tugging you down into the emotion of the rope. Especially the
emotions of the two or more people in a scene together. It can change it for
the audience too.”

Skye squeezed her neck one last time and dropped her arm.
Jenna looked up and Skye made a face. “I’m close but I still don’t get it.”

A light bulb went off in Jenna’s head as she saw Cyn
kneeling between her legs, her hands on her thighs.

“How do each of you feel when one of your men puts you on
your knees? Even as simple as them telling you to get on your knees and you put
yourself there. You submit to them. You give over your control to them. No
pain—or normally not a lot in it, unless they’re making you kneel on Legos or
something else equally sadistic. All you’re doing is following a simple
physical command, right? Yet somehow, it’s
everything
in that moment.”