Jennifer Government: A Novel (15 page)

“Sorry, buddy,” he said, straightening his tie. “Strategic initiatives are in place.” He closed the door on his way out.

Buy was a corpse. He sat in his Mitsui cubicle and stunk up the place. Brokers circumscribed wary arcs as they passed, as if what he had was contagious. He was a dead man in a suit.

On Tuesday, Cameron said, “Buy. That’s enough.”

Buy looked up. He’d known he was going to be fired for a while now. He’d thought it would be more exciting.

“My office.” Buy followed him up to the fishbowl. Cameron waited until they were seated, and even then threw in a pause. Buy waited patiently. “I offered you time off. You remember that.”

“Yes.” His voice cracked. He wasn’t using it much these days.

“I’m going to suggest it again. This time, I want you to think about it very carefully. It could save you.”

Buy felt like laughing. The idea that a week of daytime TV could make him happy again was very funny. “No. Thank you.”

Cameron sighed. “You want me to fire you? Is that it? Your termination package isn’t so hot, you know.”

“I know.”

“All right. Here’s your last chance. A transfer.”

“What?”

“You’re finished in brokerage. But there’s a lifeline, if you want it. The Mitsui Liaison to US Alliance wants an Australian assistant. That could be you.”

“The Mitsui what?”

“Mitsui is part of US Alliance, the customer loyalty program. We have a person to represent our interests there, he’s called a Liaison. You could be his assistant.”

“Oh,” Buy said. “Okay.”

“It’s not such a bad job,” Cameron said. “Could be a real growth area, you never know.”

“Thank you.” He wanted to feel more grateful, but he just felt tired. He stuck out his hand.

Cameron blinked, then shook it. “You’re in a new office, on level eight. Maintenance will get you everything you need. You should clear out your desk.”

“When?”

“No time like the present.”

“Right,” Buy said. He supposed they wanted to get the smell out.

H
e went to level eight and was shown his new office. It was small but had a big window with a view of the rest of the city. He wasn’t sure that was good. He had been thinking about the city a lot, lately. About how the city ate people.

Buy caught the elevator back to brokerage and began collecting his personal items: a coffee mug, a photo of a dog he’d owned once, and a few pens. That was it.

“Hey, I heard about your big move,” Lisa said. Buy looked up. She was smiling, but her eyes were sharp and vigilant, as if she wasn’t ruling out the possibility that he would lunge at her. “Sounds like your thing, Buy. Congratulations.”

“Thanks.”

Her eyes softened. “We’re all rooting for you, Buy. Remember that.”

“Thank you, Lisa,” he said. He was now pretty sure he was going to kill himself.

The man in the cell was Jesus Christ, or so he kept telling Billy. This hadn’t been very amusing when he’d first arrived, and had become less so over the next three hours. He sat on the bunk in the cell’s corner and pulled his knees up to his chest.

“Righteous fire!” shouted Jesus. “Damnation for—all you cocksuckers!”

Billy closed his eyes. He wondered if he could bang Jesus’ head into the cell wall and claim self-defense.

Someone rattled keys in the lock. Billy sat up quickly. The door opened. It was the woman from earlier, Jennifer. She was alone.

“Hi,” she said. “Had time to think?”

“I am the Lamb of God!” Jesus said. “The Lamb, the Lamb!”

“Not you. Billy, you thought about my offer?”

“You can’t keep me here.” Billy tried to say it as calmly as he could, but he felt his hands shaking. He really needed another cigarette. “I’m a US citizen. New Zealand can’t lock me up because I was in the wrong place at the wrong time. I want to speak to someone from the American Government or the NRA.”

Jennifer stared at him.

“What?”

“You’re in the Australian Territories, Billy, not New Zealand. Don’t you even know which country you’re in?”

“I…they flew me—right, Australia.”

“And I
am
the American Government. This is a USA country. I leave you here overnight, that’s the best you can do?”

“Uh…”

“I’ll come back later.”

“No! Wait! Okay, let’s talk!”

“No more talking. I’ve offered you a deal, you say yes or no.”

“Fuckers!” Jesus shouted. “The fucking nnnnn-nnnnn—”

“Quiet!” Jennifer said.

“All right,” Billy said, feeling hope drain away. “Get me out of here.”

She held open the door. He left the cell, feeling like he was sinking deeper and deeper.

“I’m glad you made the right choice, Billy,” Jennifer said. “I think we’re going to work well together.”

“Y
ou’re going to carry this with you at all times,” she said. “Don’t leave it where anyone can see it. Don’t let anyone pick it up.”

“A pack of smokes?”

“There’s a bug inside. I can talk back, if you plug headphones into the little jack down at the bottom. When it vibrates, that’s me telling you I want to talk. Do you smoke Marlboro?”

“Yeah, sure.”

“Don’t smoke these.”

He stared at them. “Are they drugged?”

“No, Billy, they’re cigarettes. But if you finish the pack, there’s no reason for you to hold on to the box. If you leave this thing in a trash can somewhere, I will not be happy.”

“Right,” he said, and licked his lips. He wondered if he could have one of those cigarettes now.

Jennifer eyed him. “Maybe you’re not cut out for this.”

“I am, really! It’s just…”He reached for the pack.

She looked disgusted. “What are you, on one of those highnic brands?”

“I’m cutting back.” He lit one with shaking fingers. The taste was incredible.

“Feel better?”

“Ohhh…” Things were so much better with the smoke. Even Jennifer Government looked cute, in a hard-ass sort of way

“Now let’s get this clear. You get in, you get me some people on tape talking about John Nike and NRA jobs, you get out, and you’re in the clear. But if you ditch this device and run back to Mississippi or wherever the hell you’re from, I’ll come after you. I’m the Government, Billy. You can’t escape me. Understand?”

“Yes.”

She was silent for a moment. Billy sucked on his cigarette.

“He killed fourteen kids. Thought about it, planned it, made it happen. I’m not going to tolerate that. Do you believe me?”

“Yes.”

She nodded. “You’re booked on a flight to Invercargill, New Zealand, in two hours. Don’t mess up.”

“You can count on me.” His whole body was tingling. In this moment, he really meant it.

She moved quickly, but even so they caught her outside her office. “Jennifer!”

She looked up. Elise and Calvin were by the watercooler. “Oh, hey, Elise.”

“Explain to me why you’re in this building.”

“I’m just collecting some things to take home—”

“Two weeks ago they were stitching your head back together. Now get out of my station.”

“You know, I feel really recuperated,” Jennifer said. “And I saw the shrink again and he said I’d made real progress toward processing the negative experience and resolving my role within it.”

Elise looked at Calvin. “Has she seen the shrink again?”

“Uh,” Calvin said.

“Get out,” Elise said. “I swear, Jennifer, don’t you so much as call in.”

“I’m touched by your concern, but—”

“Did it sound like I was giving you an option?”

She resisted a sigh. “No.”

“Then go home.”

“Fine,” she said, and turned.

“What do you need to go to your office for?”

“I’m getting my
jacket!”
she shouted. “Is that all right?”

“I’ll drive you home,” Calvin said.

“S
o,” she said in the car, “now we’ve got this arrest warrant—”

“Don’t even ask.”

“What?”

“You’re not coming along, Jen.”

“That’s not what I’m saying,” she said, nettled. “That’s not even what I meant.”

“Oh,” Calvin said. “Good.”

There was silence.

“So how many agents are you going in with?”

“Depends who’s available.”

“You’ll let me know how it goes?”

He stopped at a light and turned to her. “I will keep you informed, Jen.”

“Good. Thanks.”

“You know, the break could be good for you. Take some time to step back, cool down, get some perspective. Hang out with Kate.”

“I
have
perspective,” she said. “I have shitloads of perspective. That’s why I don’t want to sit at home while John Nike is still out there. I want him in jail. I want to know that when Kate goes to the shops, nobody’s going to
shoot
her. That’s my perspective.”

“Okay, okay,” Calvin said. “I get it.”

“If you let him get away, I’ll be really pissed.”

“Jen, I am a competent human being.”

“I know. I’m sorry.” She rubbed her face. She felt frustrated. “Don’t take Church Street.”

K
ate was waiting for the bus at the school gate. “Mommy!”

“Hiya,” Jennifer said. “What’s that on your face?”

“A sticker. See, it has a star on it.”

“Oh yeah.”

“How come you’re here so early?”

“I’m on vacation.”

“Oh, yay!”

“I thought maybe we could go to the park and play soccer. Do you want to do that?”

“And, after, can we go to the dog shelter?”

“It’s a bit late tonight, honey. Come on, Calvin’s driving us home.” She took Kate’s hand.

“Alex’s dog rolls on its back every time you go near it,” Kate said. “It’s weird.”

“Our dog will be much cooler,” Jennifer said.

“Can we go to the shelter tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow or the weekend,” Jennifer promised. The codes to Billy’s bug were in her pocket. “I have a couple of important things I need to do first, honey.”

John Nike was reading a novel called
The Space Merchants; it
had been reissued and he’d seen a review in
Fast Company
. They called it “prescient and hilarious,” which John was having a hard time agreeing with. All these old science-fiction books were the
same: they thought the future would be dominated by some hard-ass, oppressive Government. Maybe that was plausible back in the 1950s, when the world looked as if it might turn Commie. It sure wasn’t now.