John's Story (15 page)

“And while I am your hireling, I must not run from the wolf and leave the sheep unprotected.”

“Precisely.”

A
ll indications were that Ignatius’s Saturday-evening teaching service would be overrun with people. Despite that the Sabbath had ended and that the regular weekly worship service was scheduled for the next evening, the Lord’s Day, the house vibrated with anticipation.

John sensed Polycarp’s discomfort.

“What is it, son? You need to be of service to Ignatius this evening?”

“Yes, but you are my chief concern. I will make arrangements if you would like to continue, as tomorrow will probably be wholly lost to us. I cannot imagine the throng we should expect then.”

“Are you suggesting we break from now until Monday morning?”

“I am at your service, rabbi. A week from then, Ignatius is off.”

John could not bring himself to tell Polycarp his true fear: that he would not last until Ignatius departed. “In the interest of time,” he said, “I need you. And while I prefer treating the Lord’s Day as our Sabbath, we must redeem that time too, do you not agree?”

“I concur that time is a factor.”

“Then let us work through the evening or until my strength gives out. We will have Ignatius’s report to look forward to.”

“I more look forward to the seventh sign.”

“And well you should. Let me begin.

“You recall the Master’s dear friend, Lazarus of Bethany. He had two sisters, Mary and Martha. It was Mary who anointed the Lord with fragrant oil and wiped His feet with her hair. I’ll get to that story in due time. Others have written of it, so it is well known already throughout the church.

“The sisters sent word to Jesus, saying, ‘Lord, behold, he whom You love is sick.’ Because of where we were, Polycarp, this message would have taken at least a whole day to reach Him. Lazarus was probably already dead.

“When Jesus heard the news, He had an interesting response. He said, ‘This sickness is not unto death, but for the glory of God, that the Son of God may be glorified through it.’

“My brother James and I and a few of the others were confused. We knew and admired Mary and Martha. Besides being friends of Jesus, they were believers, very devout and serious. We were certain they would not go to the trouble to send word to Jesus about their brother’s illness, unless it was very serious and likely to be ‘unto death.’

“Jesus loved the sisters and Lazarus, but even after receiving the message, He stayed two more days where He was. I was frankly glad, because if He went back, He would be going again where His life was in danger. But finally He said to us, ‘Let us go to Judea again.’

“I said, ‘Rabbi, lately the Jews sought to stone You, and are You going there again?’

“Jesus said, ‘Are there not twelve hours in the day? If anyone walks in the day, he does not stumble, because he sees the light of this world. But if one walks in the night, he stumbles, because the light is not in him.’”

“I’m confused, teacher,” Polycarp said.

“As I was. Only later did I realize what He was saying in His unique way. I believe He considered His time on earth the daylight, when He could safely do the work His Father had assigned Him. But the ‘night’ was coming, when He would be betrayed and sentenced to death. So He wanted to redeem the time while there was still the light of day. Finally He said, ‘Our friend Lazarus sleeps, but I go that I may wake him up.’

“My brother James said, ‘Lord, if he sleeps he will get well.’

“But Jesus shook His head. ‘Lazarus is dead,’ He said. ‘And I am glad for your sakes that I was not there, because now you may believe. Nevertheless let us go to him.’

“Then Thomas said to us fellow disciples, ‘Let us also go, that we may die with Him.’ He was certain the trip into the lair of the religious leaders was suicide for all of us, and while he was being rueful, he was also loyal. He did not want Jesus to face this peril alone.”

“This,” Polycarp said, “from the one who would question Jesus’ resurrection until he saw His scars?”

“The same. Well, when we approached Bethany, about two miles from Jerusalem, we heard that Lazarus had already been in the tomb four days. Many of the Jews had joined the other women around Martha and Mary to comfort them concerning their brother.

“Martha heard Jesus was coming and actually met us on the road. She was very distressed and said, ‘Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died. But even now I know that whatever You ask of God, God will give You.’

“Polycarp, by now I should not have been surprised at anything the Master said or did. But I shuddered when He said simply, ‘Your brother will rise again.’

“Martha said what I was thinking. ‘I know that he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.’

“But Jesus said, ‘I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in Me, though he may die, he shall live. And whoever lives and believes in Me shall never die. Do you believe this?’

“Now hear me, Polycarp, I have gently chastised you and Ignatius for describing the Lord as profound, as that seems such an understatement. Yet, like you, I must say that nothing as profound as this has ever been uttered, before or since. And His question to her is the question of the ages, for therein lies eternal life: ‘Do you believe this?’

“She said, ‘Yes, Lord, I believe that You are the Christ, the Son of God, who is to come into the world.’

“Then she ran and found Mary and sent her to Jesus. We still had not reached Bethany. Mary came, followed by several Jewish women mourners, and fell at Jesus’ feet, saying the same thing Martha had said: ‘Lord, if You had been here, my brother would not have died.’

“Polycarp, it was as if seeing her distress finally made Jesus realize fully what had happened, though of course He knew all along. But when He saw her and the mourners weeping, His countenance fell and He groaned. And He said, ‘Where have you laid him?’

“She said, ‘Lord, come and see.’

“Jesus cried, and some of the mourners said, ‘See how He loved him!’ But others said, ‘Could not this Man, who opened the eyes of the blind, also have kept this man from dying?’

“When we arrived at the tomb, Jesus appeared extremely troubled in His spirit, and I was close enough to hear that He was still groaning. The tomb was a cave with a stone lying against it. Jesus said, ‘Take away the stone.’

“Martha said, ‘Lord, by this time there is a stench, for he has been dead four days.’

“Jesus said, ‘Did I not say to you that if you would believe you would see the glory of God?’ They took away the stone, and Jesus lifted His eyes and said, ‘Father, I thank You that You have heard Me. And I know that You always hear Me, but because of the people who are standing by I said this, that they may believe that You sent Me.’ Then He cried out with a loud voice, ‘Lazarus, come forth!’

“Polycarp, this was nearly sixty years ago, but I shall never forget, nor would I want to, seeing Lazarus appear in the mouth of that cave, still bound hand and foot in graveclothes and his face wrapped with a cloth. Jesus said, ‘Loose him, and let him go.’”

John, shuddering, grew quiet. Polycarp whispered, “Jesus proved His power over death. The seventh sign.”

John nodded. “Yes, and while He had proved this at least twice before, both times He had raised people who had just died, so some conjectured that they had not really died. But here He raises a man who has been dead four days, wrapped in graveclothes, and lying in his tomb. Now there could be no question. Many of the Jews who had come to comfort Mary now believed in Him.

“But some went to the Pharisees and told them what had happened. Then the chief priests and the Pharisees gathered a council and said, ‘What shall we do? For this Man works many signs. If we let Him alone like this, everyone will believe in Him, and the Romans will come and take away both our place and nation.’

“And one of them, Caiaphas, the high priest that year, said, ‘You know nothing at all, nor do you consider that it is expedient for us that one man should die for the people, and not that the whole nation should perish.’”

“What did he mean?” Polycarp said.

“He was merely saying that it was better that one man should die than that the entire nation be slain for living counter to Rome. Yet God used this as a prophetic statement, as He had with the high priests of old. From that day forward, the religious leaders plotted to put Jesus to death. Things had been growing worse, and He was hated by many, but after this, nothing was ever again the same. We all lived in danger and in fear for our lives, but He was their main target.

“He could no longer walk openly among the Jews, so we went from there into the country near the wilderness, to a city called Ephraim, and there remained. Passover was near, and many came from the country up to Jerusalem to purify themselves in advance of the feast. They sought Jesus and spoke among themselves as they stood in the temple, wondering aloud whether He would come. Both the chief priests and the Pharisees had announced that if anyone knew where He was, he should report it, that they might seize Him.

“Polycarp, are you weeping?”

The young man wiped his tears. “I know where this is going, of course. But to record a firsthand account simply makes me feel as if I were there.”

J
ohn believed he had rallied somewhat physically by dawn of the Lord’s Day. The air was crisp again and John thought it would make for a more comfortable day of work, but still he had to pray continually to avoid panic. While he believed he could actually try pacing again intermittently while dictating—which allowed him to think more clearly and feel more attuned to the Spirit of God—he was more convinced than ever that his days were numbered. He wanted to finish the account, and he had more epistles—at least three—he wished to write to the churches, and for those he had further need of Polycarp.

While John and the young man worked, much noise emanated from the courtyard, where the house staff prepared for the evening service. They expected record attendance, and without John’s or Polycarp’s assistance, the work fell more heavily on Ignatius and many others.

John raced through more incidents from the earthly ministry of the Christ, eager to get to one more miracle. “Not a sign,” he assured Polycarp. “Your examinations are over. And, of course, nothing could be greater evidence of His Godship than the resurrection. Still, there is the story of the miracle while fishing, yet we have so much more to cover first.”

Pacing gingerly, John told of Mary anointing Jesus’ feet with expensive perfume that permeated the air. “Lazarus was there, and Martha, but also Judas, who demanded to know why such an expensive item was wasted. He suggested selling it and giving the money to the poor, but we all know now he had no interest in the poor. Such income would have simply given him more to embezzle.

“Lazarus soon became a target for murder as well, because the religious leaders pointed to his resurrection as the impetus for many turning to belief in Jesus. Several people, including all of us disciples, urged Jesus to flee Judea, especially Jerusalem during the Passover feast. But He knew better. He was on assignment from His Father and knew what He was about. Not only did He not avoid Jerusalem, but He also went there with a purpose. He taught everywhere He went, even in the lair of His enemies. The crowds welcomed Him as a conquering king, and He spoke again of being lifted up, prophesying what manner of death He would endure. But we were still not listening.”

“I’m sorry to interrupt you, master.”

“By all means.”

“You say Jesus taught everywhere, even in the lair of his enemies.”

“Yes.”

“What is worse, or shall I say, more dangerous? Teaching in the lair of the enemy, or having the enemy in your lair while you are teaching?”

John squinted at the young man. “I need not ask what you are implying. If you believe I am wrong in my exhortation to Ignatius, simply say so.”

“I think you are wrong.”

“Well! And does Ignatius agree?”

“It matters not, rabbi. We will, as we have always done, defer to you and your wisdom.”

“Even if I am wrong.”

“You seldom are, teacher.”

“But a teacher is all I am,” John said. “I am not the Christ. I am not divine. I am far from perfect and certainly not all-knowing.”

“Far be it from me to counsel you, rabbi. But I urge you to consider our views on this.”

John fell silent. Then, “I will. Prayerfully. You know my fear though, do you not?”

“Of course. That Cerinthus would not be content to sit under our teaching. He would be compelled to debate us in front of our own flock.”

“If you two are to sway me on this, you must find a remedy for that possibility. Now, while we are thinking about that, let me proceed and speak of something that has not before been recorded.

“Before the Feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that His hour had come that He should depart from this world to the Father, having loved His own who were in the world, He loved them to the end. He took us to an upper room where we enjoyed a meal with Him. And supper being ended, the devil having already put it into the heart of Judas Iscariot, Simon’s son, to betray Him, Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into His hands, and that He had come from God and was going to God, rose from supper and laid aside His garments, took a towel and girded Himself. After that, He poured water into a basin and began to wash our feet, and to wipe them with the towel with which He was girded.

“When He came to Simon Peter, Peter said, ‘Lord, are You washing my feet?’

“Jesus said, ‘What I am doing you do not understand now, but you will know after this.’

“Peter said, ‘You shall never wash my feet!’

“Jesus said, ‘If I do not wash you, you have no part with Me.’

“Simon Peter said, ‘Lord, not my feet only, but also my hands and my head!’

“Jesus said, ‘He who is bathed needs only to wash his feet, but is completely clean; and you are clean, but not all of you.’ For He knew who would betray Him.

“So when He had washed our feet, taken His garments, and sat again, He said, ‘Do you know what I have done to you? You call Me Teacher and Lord, and you say well, for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you. Most assuredly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master; nor is he who is sent greater than he who sent him. If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them.’

“I was sitting close to Jesus, my head leaning against His chest after the humbling experience of His washing our feet. I could hear His heart beating when He predicted that one of us would betray Him. Peter motioned to me and mouthed, ‘Ask Him who it is.’

“And so I did. And Jesus whispered, ‘It is he to whom I shall give a piece of bread when I have dipped it.’ No one else heard this, but when Jesus dipped a piece of bread and handed it to Judas, I saw the man’s face cloud over. Jesus looked directly into his eyes and said, ‘What you do, do quickly.’

“Judas rushed out into the night, causing some of the others to wonder aloud where he was going. Someone said they assumed he was purchasing things we would need for the feast or was giving money to the poor, as he was our treasurer.

“So, when Judas had gone, Jesus said, ‘Now the Son of Man is glorified, and God is glorified in Him. If God is glorified in Him, God will also glorify Him in Himself, and glorify Him immediately. Little children, I shall be with you a little while longer. You will seek Me; and as I said to the Jews, ‘Where I am going, you cannot come,’ so now I say to you. A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another; as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.’

“Simon Peter said, ‘Lord, where are You going?’

“Jesus said, ‘Where I am going you cannot follow Me now, but you shall follow Me afterward.’

“Peter said, ‘Lord, why can I not follow You now? I will lay down my life for Your sake.’

“Jesus said, ‘Will you lay down your life for My sake? Most assuredly, I say to you, the rooster shall not crow till you have denied Me three times.

“‘Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself; that where I am, there you may be also. And where I go you know, and the way you know.’

“Thomas said, ‘Lord, we do not know where You are going, and how can we know the way?’

“Jesus said, ‘I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me. If you had known Me, you would have known My Father also; and from now on you know Him and have seen Him.’

“Philip said, ‘Lord, show us the Father, and it is sufficient for us.’

“Jesus said, ‘Have I been with you so long, and yet you have not known Me, Philip? He who has seen Me has seen the Father; so how can you say, “Show us the Father”? Do you not believe that I am in the Father, and the Father in Me? The words that I speak to you I do not speak on My own authority; but the Father who dwells in Me does the works. Believe Me that I am in the Father and the Father in Me, or else believe Me for the sake of the works themselves.

“‘Most assuredly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do he will do also; and greater works than these he will do, because I go to My Father. And whatever you ask in My name, that I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask anything in My name, I will do it.’

“Oh, Polycarp, it was a sad and melancholy time because we were finally, slowly realizing that He was saying goodbye. He taught of our relationship to Him, of our relationship to one another, and our relationship to the world. And it was clear He was talking about not only us, but about all who believe. He promised His Holy Spirit would comfort us after He was gone.

“Then He told us what was to come, but we did not understand, and further, we did not want to hear it or believe it. He said, ‘A little while, and you will not see Me; and again a little while, and you will see Me, because I go to the Father.’

“We did not understand and whispered to one another that we did not know what He was saying. It was, as usual, as if He had heard us. He said, ‘Are you inquiring among yourselves about what I said…? Most assuredly, I say to you that you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice; and you will be sorrowful, but your sorrow will be turned into joy. A woman, when she is in labor, has sorrow because her hour has come; but as soon as she has given birth to the child, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world. Therefore you now have sorrow; but I will see you again and your heart will rejoice, and your joy no one will take from you.

“‘And in that day you will ask Me nothing. Most assuredly, I say to you, whatever you ask the Father in My name He will give you. Until now you have asked nothing in My name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full.

“‘These things I have spoken to you in figurative language; but the time is coming when I will no longer speak to you in figurative language, but I will tell you plainly about the Father. In that day you will ask in My name, and I do not say to you that I shall pray the Father for you; for the Father Himself loves you, because you have loved Me, and have believed that I came forth from God. I came forth from the Father and have come into the world. Again, I leave the world and go to the Father.’

“Finally we said, ‘See, now You are speaking plainly, and using no figure of speech! Now we are sure that You know all things, and have no need that anyone should question You. By this we believe that You came forth from God.’

“Jesus said, ‘Do you now believe? Indeed the hour is coming, yes, has now come, that you will be scattered, each to his own, and will leave Me alone. And yet I am not alone, because the Father is with Me. These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.’

“He prayed for Himself, then for us, then for all believers. Not long after came all those horrible events others have written so much about: His betrayal, His arrest, His trial, His crucifixion, and His burial.”

John knew he would have to recite these horrible events yet again, adding his perspective to the accounts already written. Though he dreaded calling to mind such heart-wrenching memories, he was comforted to know he would soon finish his account with triumph. And none too soon, as even what was left of his feeble strength was waning.