Authors: Bonnie Leon
Tags: #FIC042030, #FIC042040, #FIC027050, #Women air pilots—Fiction, #Alaska—Fiction
“Yesâfor the hundredth time.” Kate loved that Paul cared about her, but since she'd been hurt, he'd been hovering. She'd never seen him so concerned for a patient.
Once on their way, Joan looked at Kate. “So, what happened?”
“We were skiing and I hit a rut or something and went tumbling. My knee went one way and my ski the other. It's just a sprain.”
“You were always too gutsy for your own good,” Joan said. “When you were a girl and we'd go skiing, I was forever telling you to slow down. Of course, you never listened.”
“Some things never change,” Paul said with a grin.
“I was just trying to catch up to you. I wasn't being foolhardy.”
No one said anything. Kate knew they didn't believe her. She slumped into the seat and crossed her arms over her chest. Why was she considered a daredevil when Paul had been just as aggressive on the hill? He didn't believe in doing things halfway any more than she did.
After getting Kate settled at home, Bill drove Paul to the airport. He had a medical run and would be gone for a couple of days. Kate rested on the davenport with a pile of magazines and books piled on the side table. Her mother seemed to take great pleasure in caring for Kate's every need, while Kate hated depending on her or on anyone else.
Her mother walked into the room carrying a cup of tea. “I'm wondering if your father and I should delay our departure. How are you going to get along when we leave?” She set the tea on the table beside Kate.
“I'll be fine. I'm getting up and around on my own more. And I have Muriel and Helen. They've been here almost as much as you.”
Joan walked into the kitchen and returned with another cup of tea and a plate of cookies. She set the dessert on the coffee table and then sat on a cushioned chair across from the davenport. “I wish you were a little less daring.” She took a sip of tea. “Have you considered what you'll do about your flying if you have a child?”
Why can't I be who I am without having to answer for it?
she thought, but said, “I don't know for sure. It's not something I have to think about today.” She was weary of the topic and didn't want to discuss it.
“Yes, but one day you will. You do want children, don't you?”
Kate's irritation intensified. “Of course we do. But whether I work or not is something Paul and I will decide togetherâat the right time.” Kate couldn't imagine not flying.
Joan set her cup on the table. “I've always worried about you. If you weren't up a tree, you were walking the top of a fence line or begging your father for another ride in his plane.” She shook her head. “You can't possibly be a mother and a pilot.”
Kate was getting angry. She sat up straighter and jarred her leg. Pain shot through her knee. She bit back a howl and instead demanded, “Why not?”
Joan compressed her lips as if trying to hold back a response. “Well . . . you're not a girl anymore. You're a grown woman with womanly responsibilities and a husband to take care of.”
Kate gritted her teeth. She knew she ought to let this go, but she couldn't. “What do you think my womanly responsibilities are?” she snipped.
“When you married Paul, you made a promiseâto love, honor, and obey. And part of that means keeping a home for him and being here when he needs you and one day taking care of his children.”
“I do love him. And what is it that you think I'm doing that doesn't honor him?”
Joan took a slow breath and picked up her cup. Her hands trembled slightly. “You need to put him first.”
“He is first. I don't know why you don't see that.”
“How can you be a full-time wife if you're off flying and leaving him to fend for himself?”
“That's not how it is.” The volume of Kate's voice rose. “We work together a lot of the time. And when I'm not home, Paul's quite capable of taking care of himself.”
Joan massaged her temples as if to soothe away tension. “Kate, are you sure your job isn't first?”
Kate wanted to scream. Why couldn't she make people understand? “MomâPaul and I agreed that I should keep flying. He said if I'm happy, he's happy.”
“But you could injure yourself or be killedâyou know how much that possibility tortures him.”
“He's come to accept the danger of my job. And there's no way to live a life of absolute safety anyway.” She clasped her hands tightly. “I could have broken my neck while I was skiing.” Kate sat up as straight as she could. “I refuse to lock myself in my house and spend my days dusting and baking and praying for a baby.”
“You know I didn't mean that.”
“Then, what
did
you mean?” Kate was beyond caring whether she was angry or not.
Her mother crossed her legs and seemed to consciously relax her muscles. “I'm just thinking about your future. A man wants a woman who will make his home a haven, a place where he can come home and know there will be a hot meal and loving arms to hold him.”
Kate studied her hands and lowered her tone. “Okay, so I don't cook so well. But I'm learning, and my arms are open to him.” Some of what her mother had said penetrated Kate's uncertainty. Was her mother right, at least partially? Did she need to make a better home for Paul? Be here for him more? “Mom, Paul and I can't be a replica of you and Dad. We've got to find our own way.”
“I don't expect you to be like me and your father.” Joan brushed a loose strand of hair off her face. “I just want the best for you. I want you safe.” Tears pooled in her eyes. “And if there are babies, they'll need you.”
“I plan to be here for them. And they can come with Paul and me some of the time.”
Joan's eyes widened. “You can't possibly take them with you.”
“When I was a girl, I went with Dad all the time.” Kate wished she could stand and walk. She wanted to get out of the house, away from the convicting words, the uncertainty.
“Flying in the Yakima valley is not the same as flying the Alaskan wilderness. You know that.”
Kate did know, and when there was a child, she wasn't sure what she'd do, but today wasn't the time to solve the question. “Paul and I will make our own decisions about all of that when and if the time comes. I don't want to talk about it anymore.”
“I'm sorry. I never meant to bring it up. It just slipped out.” Joan leaned forward, resting her arms on her thighs. “And you're rightâyou and Paul need to make your own choices.” She stood and moved toward the kitchen. “I was just trying to help.”
Kate could hear the hurt in her voice. “I know. And I'm thankful that you care.”
Joan managed a small smile. “Would you like some soup? I can warm up some from yesterday.”
“Thank you. That sounds good,” Kate said, thinking about anything but soup. She knew her life would change, that it would be complicated, but she didn't want to think about it. Not yet.
H
eavyhearted, Kate leaned against Paul as she watched her parents' train pull out of the station. Yakima was a long ways away even for a pilot.
“I wish they'd move up here,” she said, blinking back tears.
“Maybe they will . . . someday.”
“I think Mom would, but my father's married to his orchards. I don't think he'll ever leave them.” Transferring her weight to her crutches, she straightened. “It's probably for the best.”
Paul placed an arm around her waist. “Why do you say that?”
Kate hadn't shared the conversation she'd had with her mother about her continuing to work. “I think it would be hard on Mom. She's old-fashioned.” Kate glanced at Paul. She didn't want to bring up the topic of her flying, even though he'd told her he understood her passion for it.
“Old-fashioned? How so?”
“You know . . . she thinks a woman's place is at home, taking care of her husband and family.”
“It's not?” Paul grinned and gave her a squeeze.
“You're teasing, right?”
“Mostly.”
Not the response Kate wanted. “I thought you understood.”
“I do. But how can a man not want to have a beautiful woman like you waiting for him at home?” He kissed her.
Kate relaxed into him, hoping that's all he'd really meant.
“So, what do you want to do with the rest of the day?” he asked.
Lifting one of her crutches, Kate said, “I'm feeling pretty spry.” She smiled up at him and felt her heart swell at the light of love in his brown eyes.
“I was invited to go ice fishing. You think you're up to it?”
“Sure. Who invited you?”
“Actually usâand it was Sidney.”
“I didn't even know he was in town. I'd love to see him.”
“Ran into him at the mercantile yesterday. He plans on staying.”
“What do you mean?”
“He moved back.”
“But what aboutâ”
“His father died.” Paul's tone turned leaden.
“Oh. I didn't know.”
“Yeah. About a month ago. The family's able to watch over his mother so he decided he belonged here. In fact, he's back at the airfield, only as a pilot this time. Jack hired him.”
“Can't imagine Sidney working for Jack. Jack's not an easy man to work for, and he doesn't run things like Sidney used to.” Kate moved toward the car. “Are we supposed to meet him at the airfield?”
“Uh-huh. They're probably already out on the ice.”
“This should be fun.” Wielding her crutches like a pro, Kate picked up her pace. “Let's go.”
When Paul pulled up to the airfield, Kate saw Sidney's plane right off. Memories of their first meeting tumbled through her mind. He'd looked nothing like other Alaskans. He was clean shaven, wore cowboy boots and an oversized cowboy hat, and looked too young to own an airfield. He was tougher than he looked. It had taken all Kate had to convince him to give her a chance. After a nerve-racking flight, she had a job.
Kate didn't wait for Paul to open her car door. She was in a hurry and got her crutches set in calf-deep snow and maneuvered herself out of the car.
Paul managed to get there just in time to close the door behind her. “You don't have to be in such a hurry.”
“Sidney's a good friend.” She tossed Paul a smile, then as fast as she could manage, she moved toward the shop door.
Paul opened it for her and she swung herself over the threshold and inside.
Kenny and Alan were sitting across from each other at a small table, playing a game of checkers. They barely looked up. Sidney leaned against the wall near the woodstove, his well-worn cowboy hat sitting at an angle on his head and a cigarette resting between his lips. He looked older, but his blue eyes lit up at the sight of her.
He removed the cigarette. “Heard you were laid up.” His gaze moved to her crutches. He shook his head. “Nothin' keeps you down.”
She chuckled. “Why didn't you tell me you were here?” She crutched her way across the room toward him.
He met her halfway. “Only been here two days.” He pulled Kate into a bear hug. When he released her, he glanced at Paul. “Wish I could have made the wedding.”
“I thought we were going ice fishing.” Jack grabbed his fishing gear and moved to the door.
“What, no work?” Kate asked, following him.
“Not today.” Jack took in a deep breath and gazed out over the frozen lake. “Some days aren't meant for working.”
Kate wasn't sure she'd heard correctly. Jack was always set on making money, which meant working.
Sidney chuckled. “We all know what's really up.”
“What d'ya mean?” Jack snarled.
“I heard the scuttlebutt about you and your lady friend.” Sidney grinned. “What's her name . . . Linda, right?”
Kate pressed her lips tight, forcing back a sarcastic comment. She couldn't imagine Jack with anyone. Who'd be interested?
“Linda's just a friend.” The sound of a car approaching caught everyone's attention. Jack removed his cigar from his full lips, dropped it on the ground, and stepped on it.
A sparkling clean, green Plymouth pulled up in front of the shop. Jack hurried to open the door and a petite woman stepped out. The wind caught her short blonde hair and she pulled up the hood of her parka.
She smiled at Jack. “I'm sorry I'm late. I got held up at the hospital.”
“No problem. We were just about to head out.” Jack closed the car door and turned to the group. “This is Linda Carson. She's a nurse over at the hospital. Linda, these are the pilots who work for me.” His tone was authoritative.
Kate was sure he wanted to look like a big shot in front of his new girlfriend.
His short-cropped black hair looked almost frosted in the cold air. “This is Alan, Kenny, Sidney, and Kate.” He gave Paul a nod. “And Paul's our bush doctor.”
“It's very nice to meet you all.” Linda's voice was sweet and so was her smile.
“Good to meet you,” Sidney said. The rest murmured their agreement.
Kate wondered how Jack had managed to attract someone so nice and pretty. She wouldn't last.
“Well, let's get moving. The fish are waiting,” Jack said, then turned his dark eyes on Kate. “In your condition I doubt you'll be able to navigate the snow and ice.”
“I'll do just fine.” Kate held up one crutch. “I'm much better. I'll be ready for a flight by next week.”
“It's up to you.” Jack headed toward the lake, then slowed down and walked alongside Linda. He turned to Alan. “Can you get the saw and axe?”
“Sure.” Alan hurried back inside the shop.
Fishing gear in hand, the men hurried onto the ice to their fishing spot. Kate followed along behind, but kept slipping. Finally Paul and Sidney made a chair with their hands and carried her.
Embarrassed, Kate started a conversation. “Glad we've got clear skies. Seeing the sun almost makes me feel warm.”
Sidney snorted. “Sunshine or not, it's freezing out here. But Jack's got everything ready, including wood for a fire. Figured I couldn't back out. Don't like fishing much.” He studied the men who had already reached their fishing spot. “He seems a little softer around the edges these days.”
“A woman can do that for you,” Paul said with a smile for Kate.
“We'll see how long she lasts,” Kate said. Paul and Sidney set her on her feet. “Thanks for the ride.”
Alan and Kenny were clearing new ice from the hole while Jack built a fire. Linda huddled near the fledgling flames.
“Sidney, it's good to have you back. But I'm sorry about your dad,” Paul said.
Sidney nodded. “After the stroke, he never really came back. His going was God's mercy.”
Kate's mind went to her parents. Death was inevitable, but she couldn't imagine life without them.
“I'd probably still be there, but my family convinced me that this is where I belong.” He turned and looked at the airfield. “It feels good to be back.”
“How do you think it's going to work outâyou being Jack's employee instead of his employer?”
“It'll be all right. Jack'll give me a hard time, but I'm just glad to be flying again. Figure I'll like it better, just being a pilotâmore time in the air that way.” He chuckled. “I wouldn't be surprised if Jack's sorry he bought me out.”
“Yeah, some days I'm sure he wishes he was just a hotshot pilot again. But I think it's been good for him. Sometimes I'm almost convinced he actually cares about his pilots, even me.” Kate smiled.
Sidney chuckled. “Jack's always been full of himself, but I figure he's got a good soul he keeps hidden from the world. Looks like Linda might've found it.” Sidney pulled a hat with ear flaps out of his pocket, braced his cowboy hat under one arm, and pulled on the cap, tugging down the ear flaps. He planted the cowboy hat on top. He looked silly, but warmer. “The new fella . . . Alan, what's he like?”
“Quiet. He keeps to himself mostly, but he's dependable and from what I've seen he's a good pilot.”
“With my being back we've got a full crew again. That'll take some of the heat off Jack. He might be able to fit in a few extra runs.”
“Maybe,” Kate said.
Paul slipped and nearly took a tumble, almost falling into Sidney.
“Hey, watch it,” Sidney said. “Hate to have us all go down.” He sucked in a breath.
“It hasn't been that long.” Sidney straightened slightly. “Sorry to hear about Mike. Doesn't seem rightâhis not being here.”
“It's never been the same since he was killed.” Kate's heart squeezed. She leaned against Paul, thankful for him. “He was a good pilot and a good friend to everyone.”
Squinting, Sidney looked at the men settling around the fishing hole. “Over the years, we've lost a lot of good pilots. Sometimes I wonder if we're all just a bunch of nitwits.”
“I don't understand the appeal,” Paul said. “Long hours, and sometimes the work is rough, and pilots never know if their present flight will be their last.”
Kate could see worry in his eyes and so she said, “Today we're fishing, not flying.”
Kate couldn't bear to lie around any longer, so although her knee was still painful she returned to work.
“You sure you're ready?” Jack asked, eyeing her.
“My doctor, who happens to be my husband, says I'm good as new. My knee's just a little stiff.” She lifted the leg and bent her knee to prove her point, making sure not to cringe at the tenderness. “I'm dying to get back to work.”
“Bad choice of words,” Jack said dryly. “Okay. I've got a couple of miners up at Talkeetna who need a lift into town.” He handed Kate a flight chart. “They'll meet you at the airfield.”
Kate took the chart and tucked it inside her flight jacket. “Thanks.” This was a good first runâa short trip. She'd be out on the homestead in time for dinner.
“You staying in town?”
“Not tonight. But when I am, I'll let you know.”
“It'll be harder to get you runsâliving all the way out there.”
“We've got a radio, so call me anytime. It's not that far.”
“You plan on living at the cabin?”
“We haven't made up our minds yet.” Kate didn't want to think about it. She wasn't sure what to do. Paul loved the homesteadâso did she. But it didn't make sense to live all the way out there when her home base was in town.
Jack shook his head. “Don't make sense.”
“I admit, it would be easier if we were in town, but Paul built that cabin and all the outbuildings. He's got a good garden. He has a lot of time and sweat invested in the place. It means a great deal to him.”
“You'll get less work.”
“I know.” Kate hated the idea of losing business, but how could she ask Paul to give up his home? Not to mention that the house in town had been Mike'sâit still felt like his.