Judged by Him (28 page)

She waited. He knelt by her sun bed and took her hand.

“I trust you implicitly. I love you and would like my wife to be with me tonight.”

Gemma wiped back a tear of relief. “Oh, God, Jason. You don’t know what those words mean to me. I only wanted you ever. I need you.”

“I know, babe. Forgive me?” His eyes sparkled in the dim light.

“Yes, of course,” she answered immediately.

The embrace and passionate kisses ended when she found herself on top of him on the sun bed. He handed her the reins. Peeling off her dress, she unzipped his fly and released his erection. She undid the buttons of his shirt and ran her hands down his chest, over his sculptured muscles. She lowered herself onto him and leant back, making him penetrate her deeply to her core. He did nothing to aid her other than to hold her waist while she made love to him.

She knew her sexual strengths well, the pace of her undulating hips, the clenching of her internal muscles, and the angle of her body. They mutually stifled their cries with warm, open-mouthed kisses and, at the end, he held her tight against his chest. Breathless and satiated, they remained in place until the air was too cool for her to bear against her naked skin.

Gemma listened to his heartbeat. “You walk a fine tightrope with me, Jason. My mother contained me in my bedroom, my brother stalked me, and I’ve been held in captivity. Don’t let your control over me become irretrievably suffocating. I’m too fragile. I could have thrown myself off this deck into the sea if you hadn’t come to me this evening. I can’t breathe without you, and yet, sometimes, I struggle when you dominate me.”

“I will try not to suffocate you, Gemma. I know what you are saying. I came back tonight in the mind-set of work. Expecting you to submit meekly. I forgot you would welcome me back as a wife, too.” He stroked her hair out of her face. “Let’s find somewhere more comfortable to make love.”

They did so on the bed, on and off for most of the night. Between pauses for sleep and moments of sweet-natured pillow talk, they made love as equals. Each took it in turn for the other to direct and lead. Simple, romantic lovemaking and deeply satisfying to the both of them.

Gemma drew back the blinds in the morning. Her husband remained fast asleep. She found he became youthful in his sleep, almost boyish and innocent. Long eyelashes curved down, straight nose, and high cheekbones. She was glad he had been her husband that night, but now she acknowledged he was more to her. She had missed two men over the last few days. One had returned, and she wished the other to make his presence felt.

As he stirred from his slumber, she knelt by his side of the bed and patiently, with head bowed, waited for her Master to wake.

Day Thirteen

“Tell me about Ted.” Jason reclined in his leather chair, wearing cut-off jeans and his “Dare Me” sweatshirt, reclaimed from his wife’s clutches. She had confessed to sleeping in it during his absence.

Captain McKenzie grimaced, running a hand through his greying hair. He sat on one of the suede couches near the desk while Lubinsky stood by the door. The man’s straight-backed military mode reminded him of his own bodyguard back home—the stance he adopted when he had something incendiary to tell Jason.

“Ted is nothing more than a laddie,” said the captain. “Likeable and experienced at what he does. Fancies himself a lady’s man. We all knew this…his harmless banter, trying to impress the rest of the crew. Your wife took offence to his stupid boasting on Tuesday and refused to go on a boat with him. I, foolishly, saw it purely as loose-tongued, inappropriate behaviour on Ted’s part. My Navy background to blame for that. I should have taken the matter more seriously.”

“Go on.” Jason had not seen the captain twitch so much before.

“Enrique came and found me,” pitched in Lubinsky. “Late yesterday afternoon, after I had returned from your wife’s sightseeing tour of the city, he insisted I find Ted and keep him in his cabin until Enrique had spoken to the captain. The young man was with his boats. Very excited, full of himself. I don’t think he had any idea how much trouble he was going to be in. It was only when he was summoned to Captain McKenzie’s room that he became withdrawn.”

The captain continued. “Enrique had informed me that while your wife slept on the sundeck, under the canopy, Ted had, well, to be blunt, had a wank. Masturbated while she slept. Enrique saw him standing over his mess.”

Jason threw back his seat. “Lubinsky, get the boy now!”

Lubinsky stood still, tucking his hands behind his back. “He’s no longer on the boat.”

“Maria said—”

“He
was
in his cabin,” clarified McKenzie, “but I had him taken off early this morning. Sacked and disgraced, he is currently sitting in a cheap hotel room, waiting for a flight back to the UK. I didn’t think it was appropriate to abandon him without passage home. Beyond that—”

It was Jason’s turn to interrupt. “Find Enrique.”

The security officer quickly exited.

“I’m very sorry, Mr Lucas.” McKenzie wrung his hands. “I had no idea he was capable of such an indecent act. Enrique, not wishing to wake or alarm your wife, waited for him to back off and leave the deck. He had to clean up the decking. Not a happy man.”

“She made no mention of this last night.” Jason stood hands on his hips. “She doesn’t know. I’m sure of it.”

The image of her waking to find a man masturbating in her presence would have terrified her. Too similar to a mental picture she would have recalled of another man who had once stood over her with a keen erection in his hand while she sank into unconsciousness.

The arrival of Enrique led to a repeat of the events, with Jason questioning in detail what had happened.

“I could have interrupted him before he had finished, but I feared to wake her, señor. After you said she suffered with the traumatic syndrome, and in your absence....”

“No, you did the right thing. Thankfully, she is generally a heavy sleeper. Are you absolutely sure he didn’t lay a finger on her?”

Enrique grimaced. “Well, one hundred percent, no, but I wasn’t left with the impression he did. She was undisturbed and covered.”

McKenzie fidgeted nervously. “Lubinsky kept guard over the stairwells and the boy’s cabin until arrangements were made to expel him.”

Jason dismissed Enrique and Lubinsky then returned to his seat with a deep sigh. “I will go speak to the boy.”

McKenzie frowned. “I know the kind of man you are, Mr. Lucas. I’m not an innocent. The world of gay men is full of Doms and subs, subtle or overt. I won’t stand for the boy to be hurt in anyway. He is under my protection, and if you wish to press criminal charges, I am happy to arrange for it to be done. However, the news of….”

“I understand, Captain.” He admired the man’s honesty. “I’ve no desire to sully my own yacht’s status as a charter vessel. I have no plans to hurt him, McKenzie. Merely to question him. You have to appreciate that, though my techniques may not be to your liking. As you probably are aware, we Doms like to humiliate. I don’t intend to lay a finger on him. I want to hear him confess and give me an explanation of his behaviour. That is all. As for charges, I will consider my options.”

***

Jason bounded up the stairs. He felt energised by his lingering anger towards Ted. He could control it—he generally did—but his undiminished ire tested his resolve. The temptation to give the boy a hard time remained strong. He had to find out the truth. Had Ted touched his wife?

Walking swiftly down the hotel corridor, he identified the room number and banged on the door with the flat of his hand.

The cheap hotel had no spy holes so Jason had the advantage. The moment the door opened, he stuck his foot in the gap and wedged it there. The face of Ted appeared briefly. The look of shock visible, eyes wide and jaw dropping. Jason shoved the door open wider.

“Shit,” gasped the panicking Ted, who scampered backwards, almost stumbling.

Jason leant back. The latch clicked.

Ted stood by the unkempt bed. Jason gave him a quick survey, reminding himself what the crewman had to offer the ladies.

A dark-haired young man. Strong in the shoulders from hauling rope, oars, and other marine paraphernalia about. A pretty-faced boy with grey eyes and droopy eyelids. He stood with his shoulders stooped, hands clasped tightly in front of his crotch as if knowing he was vulnerable. Sweat darkened his armpits, the smell of cold, anxious perspiration filled the room. His grubby trousers, worn at the knees, and frayed laces hung about his trainers. Not a man to take care of his appearance. The relaxed confidence he had shown on the launch boat had vanished.

“Do you know why I’m here, Ted?” Jason wandered farther into the room, ignoring the cheap décor. He noted discarded sweet wrappers and biscuit crumbs on the table. He didn’t touch anything.

“No, sir.”

“Oh, I seriously doubt that. You were caught wanking in the presence of my wife—”

“She was asleep—”

“Cut the crap. You’ve got a pathetic, needy dick, and I want to know why you did it. Is that all you plan to do, or were you going to—”

Ted wrung his hands. “Please, sir. I’m very sorry.”

“Sorry for what, Ted? Tell me.”

“For...with your wife.” Ted tugged on his T-shirt, dragging it down.

“Say it! Go on. For masturbating over my wife!” Jason loomed over him. His anger remained, but something about the crewman’s bearing halted him.

Ted sobbed. “For wank...masturbating over your wife. I’m very sorry....”

The young man disintegrated. A spectacularly rapid breakdown that took Jason by surprise. Curled up on the floor, Ted clutched his belly as if in pain. He cried uncontrollably, repeated his apologies in tear-drenched sobs. The anguished man tore at his hair and wailed incoherently Then, suddenly, he regained clarity. He pounded a fist on the floor with each statement.

“I’m a shit, sir. A fucking piece of shit. Worthless piece of shit. Good for nothing. Not even a decent fuck....”

Jason stepped back and wondered if the words Ted ranted were really being addressed to him or an invisible person in the room. Rarely thrown off course, he hesitated, uncertain how to handle the situation. Women in such a state, he would hug and hold, but a man he didn’t know, especially a virtual stranger, how to respond? The lack of instinct flummoxed him. He had come to the hotel to chastise and berate Ted. He had wanted to punish him. Sometimes he struggled to contain his sadism, his desire to humiliate. Now, he regretted his intention. Gemma’s recovery from rape often reminded him people didn’t always act rationally when afraid or provoked.

After several minutes, the self-inflicted haranguing stopped spewing out of Ted’s mouth. Jason helped him sit up. He filled a glass of water, using the bathroom sink, and offered the drink to Ted’s trembling lips. After a few sips, the crewman pushed the glass away. Putting it on the table, Jason fished out his handkerchief and wiped Ted’s tear-streaked face. He made no comment as he pieced the boy back together again. Ted remained on the floor, his legs shaking ferociously.

Jason perched on the edge of the bed. “All right? What was that all about?” He waited. The nature of his collapse continued to surprise Jason. People often lost their nerve before him, rambled or stumbled over their words, but not to the extent of an emotional breakdown.

“I don’t know,” muttered Ted, his eyes darting about the room.

“How old were you when you lost your virginity. Fourteen, thirteen?” Jason raised an eyebrow when Ted shook his head at the two ages.

“Twelve, sir.”

“That’s very young. Tell me how that happened.” He spoke as if to a novice submissive, coaxing, reassuring.

“I was in care. My parents split up when I was a baby. Dad vanished. Mum, drugged up, nicking stuff, never had the time for me, often in prison, too. So, I went to a children’s home. I had a friend who visited his mum from time to time. Nobody bothered with me. I went with him. She was…the one. I went on my own one day, and after…you know…she cooked me tea. I hated the care home food. I was always hungry, ravenous. I liked her cooking.” He smiled for the first time since Jason had entered the room then it quickly vanished.

He didn’t like the start of Ted’s story. It filled him with a familiar sense of dread. “An older woman. Not a childhood sweetheart, then. Did it happen again?”

Ted drew his knees up, wrapping his arms around them. “Loads of times. I kept finding myself back there. For years. She invited others round sometimes. Men, too. I didn’t like the men. I’m not gay!” he said with a sudden fierceness in his eyes, his face screwed up.

“I’m sure you’re not.” The young man suddenly seemed to have regressed into an adolescent. He looked younger, spottier, and exhibited behaviours Jason associated with teenagers. Jason guessed he had never had a normal adolescence. “Why did you go back to her?”

“She looked after me. Bought me stuff, clothes and games. I liked her, for the most part. Except, sometimes, she would be cross with me.”

“Why was that?”

“If I couldn’t get it up for her, she bullied me,” whispered Ted. “She made me wank for her while she cooked my tea.”

Jason closed his eyes briefly, digesting the implication of the confession. The words the boy had ranted on the floor were hers, shouted in Ted’s ear as he had tried to do as she asked. What Jason saw before him was a submissive, but one who did not know he was. Not trained or given the choice, instead bullied and cajoled into a role he might never had exhibited if he’d had a normal upbringing in a caring home. A sexually immature young man who had no idea what was appropriate behaviour. He had probably masturbated so much as a child, he couldn’t stop himself.

Jason couldn’t contain his curiosity. “Why did you do it on the sundeck, by my wife?” He liked dissecting people, a technique he used when interviewing new executives. Teased them apart to find out what made them tick.

“I don’t know, sir. Honestly. I have to. It’s like a voice in my head, telling me. Seeing you two together, all romantic, fucking in the pool. I thought I could put it out of my head. I went up there and did it without even thinking. Seeing her asleep made it easy. I do it when people aren’t watching me.”