Junk (22 page)

Jasper panned his gaze around the hallway. The crack was distracting, all right, but it wasn’t the end of the world. “I’m not blind. I can see fine through my right eye.”

Lewis huffed. “And you’ve got a death-trap house to clear out? Yes, we’re going frame shopping. I know you. You’ll try to repair those things with Sellotape and a prayer, then wonder why you end up tripping up over everything. People have died buried under their own hoards, you know, and I don’t think I could live with myself if something happened to you.”

“You really mean that? I think that might be the sweetest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”

Lewis kissed him on the end of the nose. “That is a crying shame, because I can do much better than that. Now come on. I’ll help you choose some nice ones. If that’s all right with you.”

“What’s wrong with these?”

“You’re squinting, and your left eye is twitching like crazy. Do you really need to ask?”

Jasper massaged his temples, aware of the ache building up behind his left eye. “Umm, no. Okay. I’m probably best off taking these off, actually. I think you might be right.”

Lewis grinned. “Of course I am. Now let’s go choose some that make you look like the super-hot nerd you really are.”

“Oh. Okay.”

After tipping out most of the contents of his bag and stashing just his phone, wallet and broken glasses back inside, Jasper trailed out the door behind Lewis. He was nowhere to be seen under the gloom of the trees, but when he reached the end of the garden path, there Lewis was, waiting for him.

His hand outstretched.

“Come on. You look like you need someone to show you the way. Don’t want you trying to cross the road when it isn’t safe.”

Jasper bit back the urge to say he could see the cars fine; it was just the finer details of registration numbers and driver’s faces he couldn’t make out. Lewis seemed to be enjoying himself helping out, and if it meant Jasper got to hold on to his hand like a proper boyfriend would, that was fine by him.

“Let’s go.”

Chapter Twenty

Lewis walked Jasper down to the bus stop at the bottom of the hill, and they caught the bus into Bedminster. Lewis had been expecting one of those huge places like the ones you saw in the centre of Bristol, but this was more of a boutique optician and had a small selection of designer frames. Not like Jasper at all.

“What made you start coming here?” he asked as they walked in the glass door. A bell jangled above the door, announcing their entry.

“Here? Oh, I don’t know. It was the closest place, and I like it. Not too much choice. I got overwhelmed the one time I went into a Specsavers.”

“Makes sense.” Decision making was such a difficult process for Jasper, Lewis could understand why this was the best option. “They’ve got a really nice range in here, though. Great choice.”

“Thanks.” Jasper beamed.

The receptionist frowned when she saw Jasper’s mangled specs. “I’ll see what we can do to make these wearable in the meantime, but it’s going to take a few days to get you a new pair. Could be longer, depending on your prescription. When was the last time you were tested?”

Turned out it had been way too long, but luckily there was a slot free for an eye test in half an hour. Jasper sat on the chair by the door while Lewis walked up and down the display aisles, picking up various frames and peering at them. He even tried on a pair of horn-rimmed frames. The price tag dangling by his temple slightly detracted from the air of studious chic he was after, but they suited him.

“Wish I needed glasses,” he said, turning to Jasper. “Something like this would be a great way of accessorising my face.”

“Why would you want to accessorise your face? It’s perfectly nice the way it is.”

Lewis frowned into the mirror. “Oh, you know. Just to take attention away from all this.” He gestured at his cheeks.

“All what?”

Did he really need to spell it out? Surely Jasper couldn’t be that oblivious. “You know, the scarring. It’s so ugly.”

“It bothers you? Why? I think it makes you look rugged.”

“Rugged? Baby, I’m so far from rugged, I may as well be dancing ballet in a pink tutu.” Baby? Where did that come from? Friends with benefits. Not boyfriends. He really needed to keep the distinction somehow, for both their sakes. Right now, Jasper was looking kind of dazed.

Oh, the power of idle little words, uttered almost without thinking.

“I like your skin,” Jasper said after a long pause. “It’s kind of…sexy.”

“Seriously?” Lewis turned back to the mirror and stared at the pitted scars. Carlos had hated them. “My last boyfriend encouraged me to look into plastic surgery for it.”

“Your last boyfriend sounds like an opinionated bastard.”

Lewis gazed into his reflection, strangely pensive. “I think perhaps you’re right. It really doesn’t bother you?”

“Not at all. Why would it? I’m the last person to criticise anyone else’s looks. I’m no oil painting myself.”

“That’s not true. I’d paint you if I had the skills. Seems like Carroll hogged all the arty genes, though.”

“I’m scruffy, and my nose is huge.”

“Yeah, but you know what they say about men with big noses,” Lewis teased. “All true in your case, I can vouch.”

It took a moment for Jasper to cotton on to what he meant, and when he did, his cheeks heated. “Oh. Do they really say that? I thought it was feet.”

“Feet, noses, ears, whatever. You’ve got pretty big feet too, you know.”

Jasper stared down at his battered old trainers. “Must be why I keep tripping up over things, then.”

Lewis grinned. “Well, I’m not saying it’s big enough to mess with your centre of gravity or anything, but maybe. It’s a respectable size.” It was fun to watch the flush spread from Jasper’s neck up to his cheeks. Flirting. He’d been struggling to hold it back all the time he’d known Jasper, but the man responded beautifully.

Jasper mumbled something incoherent and turned to look out of the front window. God knew what he could see without his lenses. Probably just a blur of blobby colours.

Lewis should look for some frames for him. Something to really suit him and bring out the colour of his eyes. Something… Oh crap. He was doing it again, wasn’t he? Trying to dress a man the way he wanted. Trying to change him. Everything Brandon had accused him of.

He must have looked as stricken as he felt, because when Jasper turned back, he rose and took a tentative step towards him. “Hey, what’s up? You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.”

“Yep, and he was rattling his chains, warning me off.”

“What?”

“Sorry. I just realised I was doing what I always do, and I need to stop doing that.”

“Umm, you’ve lost me.”

Oh, poor Jasper. He really didn’t have a clue what Lewis was on about. Time to come clean and make some confessions. Lewis checked around the shop again, but no one else had entered while he’d been distracted by the frames. “I try to improve people,” he said. “Always have done. Their clothing, their thoughts and feelings.”

“So? Sounds like a pretty good goal to have.”

“It’s not, though. It’s manipulative. It’s part of why I’ve been trying to stay single. Get my own head in order while I figure out what I really want. There’s no point in falling for my idea of what someone’s like, rather than the real person. Sets me up for heartbreak every time.”

Jasper nodded slowly, his eyes unfocused as if he was looking deep inside himself. Or perhaps it was simply that he couldn’t see properly. “You sound like you have it all figured out.”

“Wish I did.” Carlos had accused him of having it “all figured out” several times, always in a sarcastic tone, but from Jasper the same words sounded wistful. “All I know right now is I need to avoid getting involved with anyone I’m seeking to change. It’s not healthy.”

“What if they want to change?”

“It’s still not healthy.”

“So you’re not going to help me choose some frames that suit me?”

“I shouldn’t,” Lewis hedged.

Jasper peered at the display case they were standing next to and ran his fingertip down a row of lenses until he reached a boring pair of silver wire-framed oval ones. He picked them up and put them on. Lewis winced. Oh, so not right with Jasper’s features. Wrong colour, wrong weight, wrong shape…

When Jasper began talking, his words were careful, deliberate. “Lewis, I’m asking you as a friend, and a friend only. Please could you help me choose a pair of frames that look good on me?”

“Why?”

“Because I trust your judgment, and otherwise I’m just going to get these.”

“Those are terrible.”

“Right. But I can’t see why, so I need you to help me out here.”

“But if those frames are okay by you, then that’s fine, isn’t it?”

“No!” Now Jasper actually sounded exasperated. “It’s not fine, because I want to have a pair that make you think I’m some kind of… What did you say? Sexy nerd?”

“You’re a sexy nerd anyway, no matter which frames you wear.”

Jasper’s mouth twisted into a smile. “Thanks, but I’d really rather you weren’t thinking how bloody awful my glasses were every time you look at me. So help me out? Please?”

Well, when he put it like that… Lewis let his resistance crumble, and euphoria rushed in. Oh, giving in to the urge to shop for Jasper was like a drug rush. His weakness. He gave Jasper a wry smile. “You do realise you’re enabling my shopping addiction, don’t you?”

Jasper’s face fell. “Oh, I’m so sorry, I wasn’t thinking—”

“No, no! Don’t be sorry. I’ve been wanting to sort out your specs ever since I first saw you. Even back in school. You had this awful pair of gold-rimmed round ones. Who the hell told you those looked good on you?”

“You remember those?” Jasper’s expression transformed into wonder. “I don’t even remember those. You really noticed me back then?”

Was this really the time to confess it, here in a shop surrounded by glasses? Oh, what the hell. Jasper already knew about his shopping problem, so this couldn’t be any more embarrassing.

“I fancied you like crazy at school. Used to hang around by the languages block at certain break times when I knew you’d be leaving the lab, just to get a glimpse of you between classes.”

“I, er, wow.” Jasper seemed at a loss for words, his mouth opening and closing. “I never…”

Lewis pushed his jaw shut with a fingertip. “You don’t have to say anything. I already know you didn’t feel the same way. Not back then. How could you? I looked a right state. Besides the zitty face, black and white really don’t do anything for me. That school uniform couldn’t have been designed to be any worse for me. Now you, on the other hand, looked hot as hell in it.”

Lewis turned away to the nearest bank of frames, avoiding the intensity in Jasper’s gaze. “Dark, strong colours really suit you. You could get away with any of these heavier frames.” He picked up a pair of black ones. They were rectangular, and the inside of the frame was white, giving an interesting two-tone effect around the lenses. Yes, they were plastic, but they seemed to be really well made. Should be at that price, anyway. “Here, try these on.”

Oh yes, they were perfect. Jasper studied his reflection, frowning. “They’re very…black.”

“Yep. It’s a great colour for you.”

“Aren’t they going to be all anyone notices about me?”

“I doubt it. Maybe if they didn’t suit you, but as it is, they kind of blend in.” No, that wasn’t the right expression. “They enhance the rest of your features. Make you look about ten times more delicious.”

“Oh.” Jasper blinked at his reflection and pushed the frames back up his nose. “If you say so, then. They’re pretty comfy.”

“You don’t want to try on any more for comparison?” Not that he wanted to encourage Mr. Indecisive to procrastinate.

“No. I trust your judgment.”

Good thing somebody did, because Lewis was having major wibbles right now. Jasper was showing signs of becoming dangerously dependent on him.

After they got the house cleared, Lewis would have to find a way of drawing back gently. Easing away so that Jasper could stand on his own two feet.

Otherwise, what kind of relationship were they going to end up in?

Chapter Twenty-One

Lewis parked the van outside Jasper’s house at nine a.m. the following morning. He peered out the window at the dark clouds on the horizon and checked the weather app on his phone. Thundery showers expected later. If they could load up at this end before the rain hit, they’d be fine unloading at the other end, as they could drive right into the warehouse.

It just remained to be seen how easily Jasper could bear to let his precious books out of the house.

Lewis pulled as much positive energy into himself as he could and, despite the muggy heat and the general grottiness of his jeans and T-shirt house-clearing outfit, was feeling pretty chipper as he walked up the garden path.

Jasper must have been waiting for him, because the front door was open.

Fully open. And there was Jasper, beaming at him as he added more books to the top of a pile on the path. He looked ever so slightly odd with his makeshift specs—one lens shining and the other missing—but it just added to his ragtag charm.