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Authors: Faye Kellerman

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BOOK: Jupiter's Bones
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A good point. Decker told her so.

She sat back down, trying to calm herself, holding her coffee cup to mask shaking hands. “Toward the end, Mom claimed that he got threatening! What else could she do!?” She pounded her desktop for emphasis, then threw her head back. “She must have felt it saved our lives to get him away from us.”

“Maybe it did.”

“I don’t know…” She looked up. “Things certainly didn’t work out well in my family. My brothers, though brilliant, never reached their full potential. Both of them dropped out. Emulating Dad, I guess. Because they really never knew him as Dad the scientist, just…Dad the nutcase. One’s now a hermit in India. I haven’t heard from Jason in five years. The other—Kyle—he spends most of his time whaling with the Eskimos in Alaska. He did say
he’d come down for Dad’s funeral if that
ever
gets under way.”

Decker asked, “Why didn’t your mom initially commit him closer to home?”

“I don’t know why!” she blurted out. “Maybe fear of discovery. Or maybe she wanted him far away.” Eyes watering, she cried out, “Who the
hell
are we to judge her actions!”

“You’re right, Europa. I’m sorry if I offended you.”

“It’s all right.” She closed her eyes. “Nothing I haven’t wondered myself.” A hesitation. Then she opened her eyes and said, “I understand why she lied to us as youngsters. What I
can’t
understand was why she continued the lies after we were grown. Finding out in some anonymous letter was dreadful! She should have
told
me!” Under her breath. “She should have
told
me.”

“So at twenty-one, you took on the burden of caring for your father. You hired a lawyer and became his conservator.”

She said nothing. Then, “Twenty-two actually. Took me a year to organize my thoughts.”

“Noble of you,” Decker remarked.

“Noble, but shortsighted. As soon as Dad was released, Pluto grabbed him. At first I was relieved. I was a struggling college student with meager means of support, and here was this guy, who had known my father for years back in West Virginia, still willing to care for him…to attend to his needs. It wasn’t until they formed the Order that Pluto’s true intentions finally dawned on me. Dad, for all his craziness, was still a magnetic, powerful and completely mesmerizing leader. Pluto was completely the opposite. He could offer a shipload of drunken sailors a dozen whores, and they’d walk away from him. He was simply
repulsive
in the true sense of the word. There wasn’t any way he could attract followers. But what he could do was manage my dad, who could attract followers.”

She rolled her eyes.

“Talk about teamwork—what’s it called?
Folie à deux?
Two crazy people getting together, each one feeding the other’s grandiose delusions and wreaking havoc?”

Another big sigh.

“It was a losing battle from the start. Pluto kept stoking Dad’s crazy thoughts…completely manipulating him.”

“But once the Order was established, it was your dad who was in charge.”

“I think Venus helped in that regard—decreasing Pluto’s hold over him. For that reason, I should have been grateful to her. Although, at the time, I was pretty damn angry at her.”

“Pluto manipulating him, Venus manipulating him. But you were the one with the true power. Yet you never considered recommitting your father.”

“I know this sounds strange, but I couldn’t stomach the thought of my father locked up again. Like he was nothing but some psychofreak…which he was.”

“You acted out of kindness.”

“It was a toss-up. Medicated and controlled, or crazy but free. I felt, rightly or wrongly, that he deserved to live his warped life in some kind of dignity.”

“Even though your father’s insanity had turned him—and you by extension—into laughingstocks among the scientific community.”

“Yes, he made quite an idiot out of himself. But that wasn’t the worst part. He had these crazy theories about aliens and time travel. Some of it—the time travel part—was grounded in sound science.
Most
of it was highly implausible. If he had kept his time machines at the theoretical level, it wouldn’t have been so bad. But he started trying to build one using money from his old bank accounts. Dad may have been delusional, but he knew his bank numbers.”

“Funny how that works,” Decker said.

“Tragic is more the word. He took out almost all of Mom’s hard-earned, penny-pinching joint savings before we caught on. Mom blamed
me
for everything. She kept
saying if I had left well enough alone, none of this would have happened. So here I was, at twenty-one, responsible for both my parents’ problems.”

“No wonder you let Pluto take over.”

“I did, but it was a mistake. At least Pluto didn’t take the money and run, I’ll say that much for him.”

“Maybe your father never
gave
it to him.”

She hit her forehead. “Of course, he didn’t. Dad must have used the money to form the Order.”

“He had savings when he died, you know.”

She shrugged.

Decker said, “It all belongs to you.”

“No it doesn’t,” she said. “Dad’s
insurance
policy money belongs to me. But his savings—which are in the high five figures—belong to all those poor children who are now without parents. The savings might have belonged to my half-siblings. But they died in the explosion.”

A heavy-sigh.

“You want to know something?” she exclaimed. “I think the Order made Dad better. Better meaning more sane or more…conventional. The sect gave him a title, gave him a forum for his lunatic ideas, gave him respect, gave him a home and a woman. The times he had called me around my birthday, he had sounded much less paranoid than when he had first been released from Harrison.”

She rubbed her mouth.

“Back then, he had been in so much…
…pain
. Terrorized by his own shadow, looking at me with waifish eyes. Like I was going to
hurt
him. The paranoia and psychotropic drugs had just…stripped his soul. He wasn’t like that when I talked to him. Sure, he was off, but…not like he had been at Harrison. Maybe the insanity was still present. But at least the dread and fear were gone.”

Decker nodded.

She said, “I’ve heard that sometimes the paranoid hallucinations lessen with the aging process. That the voices
may be there, but the patient is rational enough not to listen to them.”

Decker asked, “He heard voices?”

“Auditory hallucinations are the most common kind. Even as a kid, right before he left, I remember him saying that aliens were going to come get us if he didn’t build his time machine and fly away.”

Decker remembered her telling him that. “He still heard those voices, Doctor.”

She sat up. “How do you know?”

“Right before he died, he was planning to build a time machine.”

She thought about Decker’s words. “So maybe he wasn’t getting better at all. Maybe he was still afraid of aliens. That’s too bad.”

“Maybe he’d get better, and then maybe he’d sink.” Decker spoke softly. “Maybe the roller-coaster ride between sanity and insanity finally drove your father to do the extreme. It could be the voices told him to take flight with vodka and pills. Maybe that’s why he killed himself.”

“Didn’t you say he was poisoned?”

“He was poisoned, but not with enough arsenic to kill him.”

“So you think he took his own life?”

“Yes, I now think your father committed suicide.”

“I don’t know if that makes me feel better or worse.”

“At least he died peacefully,” Decker said. “Which is a lot more than I can say for the others.”

The room became silent. Then she said, “If I hadn’t freed him, the Order might never have existed.”

“So you think this whole thing is your fault?”

She made a face. “No, of course not!”

Decker said, “Your father, though mentally ill, must have been a very powerful man. He was the undisputed leader of the Order of the Rings of God, and, as such, he controlled not only his regular cult members—who were no doubt not the most stable tops in the toy box—but also
his gurus, who were out-and-out flaming psychopaths. For years, the Order, under Jupiter’s leadership, lived in peace with its neighbors. If Bob hadn’t self-destructed, the Order would be standing today with Pluto at the helm. It was your father’s
death
that started this whole ugly chain of events.”

“But his release from Harrison played some part in it.”

“You go back far enough, Dr. Ganz, and everything was related. Don’t the scientists say that eons ago, the four major physical forces that rule the universe were once one big megaforce right before the Big Bang?”

“Yes, that’s the theory.” She set her elbows on her desk and propped her chin up with her hands. “You know, it’s strange how things are connected. You really never know the long-term consequences of anything, do you?”

“No, you don’t, Doctor,” Decker said. “And that’s why I believe in God and not science.”

Two weeks of
respite, and Decker was going stir-crazy from boredom. Dying to get back to work. Until he
did
go back. Then he wished he hadn’t been so anxious to return to the grind.

Actually, the first day wasn’t all
that
bad. But he was glad when it was over. It was good to get home. Work had provided a wonderful refuge, had kept Decker’s mind occupied on details so he didn’t actively think about dead babies, adults in an inferno and scores of body parts. Yet every time he had passed Marge’s empty desk, he had felt his stomach turn over. She was doing great, due back within a month’s time. But her very absence had reminded him of things he hadn’t wanted to think about. And he knew he wasn’t alone in that regard. The entire Homicide detail would have benefited from a healthy dose of Prozac. Instead, they had opted for ye olde cop bar, inviting Decker to the festivities. He declined, saying that at least his family deserved a father figure if not an actual father.

Opening the front door, he was surprised to see Marge sitting on his couch. He grinned and hugged her fiercely. “Staying for dinner?”

She hugged him back. “No, Loo, not tonight.”

“No?” Decker let her go. “What are you running off to? Who’s the hot date?”

“Four lost adolescent girls still assigned to DPSS.”

“Ah!”
Kids from the Order
. Decker sat down, patted the empty cushion next to him. “It’s wonderful of you to give of yourself…remain in such close contact with them.”

“I have no choice. As long as those children are without homes, I have to go to them.”

“Does Lauren Bolt go with you?”

“She did for a while. But…she couldn’t take it…the press and everything. Hey, even heroes need a break.”

A well-deserved break to say the least
. Decker pictured Lauren’s face as she’d emerged—a shell of a human being. But weren’t they all.

“Anyway,” Marge continued, “she’s off with Lyra to Australia. Now that Lyra’s mother is dead…blown up with the rest…anyway, they’re going try it down under for a while.”

“Sounds good.”

“Doesn’t it though.”

“You should think about it—for a vacation, I mean.”

“Australia?”

“Australia, Fiji, Hawaii.” He smiled. “Darlin’, you’ve got the time. Take advantage.”

“Not right now.” She smiled back. “At the moment, I’d like to stay close to home. And then there’re the kids.”

Decker looked at her—his partner for over ten years, his friend for over fifteen. “Margie, the kids are in the hands of professionals who are very able people—”

“I don’t want to hear this—”

“You should
relax
while you have the chance.”

She took his hand. “Peter, I know you mean well. Everyone means well. But I
need
to do this.” She shook her head. “You just
can’t
understand where I’ve been.”

He was quiet.

“None of the pros think it’s bad that I’m there with the girls. Matter of fact, one said it’s probably good therapy for me. I think he’s right.”

“Margie, it’s wonderful that you’re there to be a solid rock for them. But I’m just wondering what happens after
the kids are placed? Where does that leave you?”

She managed a kind smile with wet eyes. “I’ll be fine.”

This time, Decker took her hand. “You get attached to the buggers. Like leeches, they get under your skin.”

“It’s true.” She pulled her hand away and stared over his shoulder. “In fact, I have Vega staying with me—”


What!
” Decker said. “What do you mean, ‘staying with’ you?”

Her eyes bore into his. “I don’t know how I can say it any more clearly. Vega is staying with me.”

“For how long?”

“Maybe five, six years—”

“Are you
nuts
!”

“Well, thanks for the support!” Marge stiffened. “I’m glad I spoke to your wife before I talked to you.”

Decker started to speak, but backed off. “Okay…” He tapped his foot. “That’s really great…I mean, you’re great to do this.” Under his breath, he muttered, “I hope you know what you’re doing—”

“No, I
don’t
know what I’m doing!” she cried out. “I just know I have to do this! Pete,
you
don’t see Vega’s little face every day. You don’t see that pathetic look in her eyes, that ‘God, help me please, I’m drowning’ look! She’s so damn lost! They’re all so
damn
lost!”

She wiped her eyes.

“Pete, I was given something, a very, very special gift.” She swallowed hard. “The gift of a
second
chance at life. I was literally brought back from the dead, no small thanks to you—”

“I didn’t do anything—”

“From what I heard, you did
everything
.”

He didn’t answer.

“Peter, what kind of human being would I be if I didn’t reach out to them…to her? How could I not…” She turned her head away and held back tears. “I know I can’t save the world. I’m a cop, for God’s sake, and I know the injustices that exist. I’m powerless to change the
world. But maybe…just
maybe
, I can make a little difference to a very vulnerable lost girl.”

“I…” Decker bit his lip. “I think that’s very wonderful of you. I’m just…concerned about where it leaves
you
. Your life changes with kids. Margie, it’s irrevocable…irreversible. You can’t go back when it starts to get rough. And it’s going to get rough.”

“I’m
not
going to change my mind.”

Decker looked into her eyes, though it was her heart that was talking. “Okay.”

She asked, “Would you give yours up for anything?”

“Of course not. But I have a little help.” He took in a deep breath, let it out slowly. “Honest to God truth? I couldn’t do it without Rina. I’d muck everything up. Lord knows, I muck up enough even
with
her.”

“If you had to, you’d rise to the occasion of single parenthood.”

“Please, God, don’t ever test me!” He prayed with sincerity. “What about
you
, Margie? What about your love life? How do you think your dates are going to take to your new responsibility?”

“If they don’t take to her, I don’t want them in my life,” Marge answered. “Christ, Decker, I’m thirty-six with no candidate on the horizon. My clock is ticking like a time bomb. I
like
children. I was a juvey cop for ten years. I may not look the part of an earth mother, but I’m not devoid of maternal feelings.”

“There’s always the Girl Scouts.”

“Now you’re being glib.”

“I am,” Decker admitted. “I’m sorry.”

She felt tears well up in her throat. “Peter, I didn’t
ask
for this. It was…given to me—this challenge. I have to live with myself. I can’t turn my back on her. Not now…not ever.” She stood up. “I’ve got to go.”

He got up from the couch, held her by the shoulders. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you actually look happy.”

She rolled her eyes.

He said, “You could have brought her with you. Here, I mean.”

“She’s with the others—her spiritual brothers and sisters. Everyone agrees. It would be tragic to immediately split them all up.”

“They’re all orphans?”

“Orphans yes, but not without family. Some have aunts and uncles. Some have grandparents. But the legalities take time. Not to mention the adjustments. And then there’s the paperwork for guardianship or adoption.”

A pause.

“And then there are others, like Vega, who are totally without family.” She shook her head. “Completely alone.”

“Don’t mention them to Rina. She’d adopt the world if you’d let her.” Decker was only half-kidding.

“She’s calm, isn’t she? Especially considering all she’s gone through.”

“Very calm.” Decker was in awe. “Child rearing. Some people just have more tolerance for life’s ambiguities.”

Margie kissed his cheek. “If you call tomorrow, and I’m not home, don’t worry. If all goes well, I’m taking the four stunned girls to their first outing at the mall.”

“Good luck to you.”

“Originally, I wanted Disneyland. The head shrink thought that might be a bit too much sensory overload.”

“A man with a brain.”

Marge smiled—a sweet, sweet smile. “See you later.” She craned her neck and shouted out, “Bye, Rina!”

“Wait!” Rina came running out of the kitchen, holding a Lucite salad bowl. “So we’re on for tomorrow?”

“I’ll meet you at ten sharp.”

“You’re
part
of this?” Decker asked.

“Cindy, too. Like it or not, we’re partners in crime.” She stood on her tiptoes and kissed Decker’s cheek. “How was your first day back?”

“Yeah, how was that?” Marge asked.

“Good, actually.”

“Hope to be with you in a month.”

“Nothing would make me happier.”

Marge paused. “Anything new?”

“Yeah, as a matter of fact, Judy Little found—” He glanced at Rina. “I think I smell something burning.”

She smiled knowingly at Marge. “He thinks he’s protecting me.” She patted his cheek. “I’ll let him labor under that delusion. See you tomorrow.”

She left the room. Decker waited a moment longer, then whispered, “A partial jawbone—a mandible with two back molars. It was burned but the amalgams held. Annie Hennon has matched them to one of Venus’s X rays.”

“Ah…” Marge nodded. “So she was there?”

“Appears that way.”

“And Bob Russo?”

“Still nothing definitive,” Decker said. “But that doesn’t mean anything. The place is one big boneyard. Ironically, the only bones
not
there are
Ganz’s
bones.
His
are still in cold storage, waiting to be tested for arsenic poisoning—if we can ever locate his vitamin bottles—”

“What do you mean?”

“It seems the bottles have been temporarily mislaid—”

“What?” Marge was shocked. “The lab
lost
the bottles?!”


Supposedly
, they checked the suckers back into the evidence room. But Evidence doesn’t have them. So now
I’ve
got to play Sherlock fucking Holmes, trying to figure out where the lost evidence bags are. This all came down today, by the way. Hit my desk as soon as I walked into the squad room. I spent half my first day back trying to track down the lab’s fucking paperwork—”

He stopped talking, waved his hand in the air.

“You can tell I’m getting better psychologically. Petty things are getting to me.” He smiled. “Next time you come, bring Vega for dinner. Maybe her manners will rub off on my kids.”

“More likely, theirs will rub off on her.”

“Ain’t that the truth.” Decker heard Sammy’s car engine chunking along. “Hold on.” He opened the front door and shouted, “Don’t block her car, Sammy! She’s about to leave.”

Ignoring his stepfather, Sammy turned off the motor. He stuck his head out the window. “Just tell me when and I’ll move the car.” Then he, Jacob and Hannah got out of the Volvo. The boys walked under the load of overstuffed backpacks, but Hannah was as free as the wind.

“Daddeeee,” she shouted.

“Hannah Roseeee,” Decker answered, picking her up and swinging her over his head.

Marge stepped out, into the misty dusk air. “I’m leaving now, Sam.”

Sammy tossed his stepfather the keys. “Nice catch, Dad. One-handed. Can you move the car for me? I’ve got lots of homework.”

Marge stared at the teen, who was completely oblivious to what he had just done. She started laughing.

Decker laughed with her. He jingled the keys while carrying Hannah on his shoulders. “And you’re doing this voluntarily?”

“I’m crazy,” Marge said.

Aren’t we all
, Decker thought. But he took Hannah, strapped her into the backseat, and moved Sammy’s car anyway. He actually took it as a compliment that Sammy had stopped treating him with kid gloves. Things were starting to get back to normal.

He went back into his house, put Hannah down, her little feet refusing to plant onto the floor. Finally, he got her to stand up. “Why don’t you go watch cartoons, sweetie.”

“Will you watch with me?”

“Can I rest for a minute?”

“Daddy, you can have
two
minutes.”

“So magnanimous!” He kissed her soft, silken cheek. “I think it’s
Scooby-Doo
. I’ll see you soon.”

She scooted off. He plopped onto the living room sofa, threw his head back and stared at the ceiling. Moments later, Jacob took up the cushion next to him, laying his head on Decker’s shoulder.

“Tired?” Jacob asked.

“A little.” Decker kissed his son’s forehead. “How about yourself?”

“A little.”

“It’s after six,” Decker said. “Where did you guys go?”

“Sammy and Hannah picked me up from the Teen Hot Line Crisis Center.”

“Oh!” Decker sat up and so did Jacob. “How’d that go?”

“Well…” Jacob cracked his knuckles. “Grandpa never raped me, so I guess I’m one hell of a lucky guy.”

Decker winced.

“And I discovered that divorce…it’s a very lousy thing. Maybe…maybe even worse than losing a parent.”

“Depends on the divorce.”

“Well, the ones the hot line got were
pretty
nasty. Then again, no one calls when everyone’s getting along. Or at least faking it.” Jacob thought a moment. “We got a couple of abuse cases—physical abuse. Parents whacking their kids close-fisted. That’s one of the center’s main criteria for reportable abuse. Slugging with a fist.”

“Did you actually talk to any of the callers?”

“No. I just listened in on the tape recorder. Wow! I
marvel
at the counselors. They’re
my
age, and they handle the callers like seasoned pros. I wouldn’t know
what
to say. I’d just like…freeze. Or worse, I’d say the wrong thing and send someone into the Pacific Ocean without a life jacket. It’s really amazing…what they do.”

“They learned, Jacob. And you’ll learn, too.”

“I hope so.”

“They were nice to you?”

“Real nice. It was…okay. It felt good actually.” He threw his head back onto the couch pillow. “Some people
have it very rough.” He turned to his stepfather. “I wasn’t being facetious, you know. I think I am lucky.”

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