Just for Now (23 page)

He’d followed me. Bastard.

“Why didn’t you tell this to Marcus?”

“Marcus ain’t my only friend. I don’t got favorites.”

I let my head fall back on the headrest and sighed. “How long have you known?”

“Since the Friday after the engagement party. I was sure you were dealing drugs, and I was tailing you.”

“So you knew before I started dating Manda?”

Rock nodded. “Yep.”

‘Then why the hell did you let me get away with it? I couldn’t stay away from her. Someone needed to stop me.”

“Because I was pretty damn sure you were in love with her. I’d never seen you in love. And Manda is a sweet girl. I figured if anyone could make you walk the straight and narrow, she could. But you never stopped working. I couldn’t figure that out.”

“I have mouths to feed.”

“There are other jobs out there that don’t require illegal activity.”

I let out a hard laugh. “Nothing pays me enough. The ones that do I’m not qualified for.”

‘That’s ’cause you’re looking in the wrong place.”

I turned my head to look at him. “Where do you suggest I look?”

“You’re looking in the right place now.” He smirked. “Drive to Pensacola. I got a guy I want you to meet.”

“In Pensacola?”

“Yep. He owns a club. I used to work for him. Bouncers get paid real well. Late hours and good money.”

A bouncer?

“How good is the money?”

Rock closed his door and buckled his seat belt. “The nicer the club, the better the pay. The place I’m taking you to pays more than most at fifty dollars an hour, and you’ll get six hours a night. As many nights as you can handle.”

Three hundred dollars a night. I could work Thursday through Sunday nights and make twelve hundred dollars a week.

“You think you can get me this job?”

Rock laughed. “I already got you the job. I’m just taking you to meet your new boss and get your paperwork done. You start this weekend.”

Amanda

After two weeks of dreading calculus because I’d have to see Preston, and then arriving and him not being there, I had come to the conclusion that he’d dropped the class. This was a good thing. I didn’t want to see him. I wasn’t sure yet how I’d react to seeing him.

My phone started playing my ringtone, and I reached into my backpack and pulled it out as I walked across campus to the coffee shop. I needed caffeine if I was going to make it through the study group I was headed to next.

“Hello.”

“Good morning,” Jason’s voice greeted me.

“Good morning to you, too,” I replied.

“You sound better this week.”

Jason had made the mistake of calling me the day after my breakup with Preston. When he’d asked me how I was doing, I’d starting sobbing and telling him about my breakup. Of course I left out the actual reason why we broke up. Preston didn’t deserve my protection, but I couldn’t stop myself. I loved him. He’d shattered my heart, but I still loved him.

“I think it works that way. Each week you get a little better. Maybe by next month I’ll be out dancing in clubs.”

Jason chuckled. “Yeah. Well, let’s not get carried away. Clubs aren’t real safe for a single girl. I, of course, could escort you.”

I hadn’t led Jason on at all. I’d been painfully honest with him. I was still in love with Preston. I probably always would be. But if Jason wanted to be friends, then I’d like that. I needed friends right now.

“I’ll keep that offer in mind.”

“How’s wedding planning coming in the Hardy household? Only two more weeks.”

The wedding had taken over our lives. There were flowers everywhere, and candles and several different china patterns covering the dining room table. It was insane. Willow was the most laid-back bride I’d ever met. She just smiled and agreed to things. My mother, on the other hand, was a freaking bridezilla, and she was just the mother of the groom.

“I think I may borrow that jet of yours and fly to the Keys until it’s over. That or kill my mom.”

Jason laughed. “I’ll let you borrow the jet, but I don’t think Jax has enough influence to get you off the hook for murder. Running away sounds like a safer plan.”

“You’re probably right. I’ll stick with plan A.”

“I’m still planning on kicking your butt on the Go Kart track. After the wedding, the race is on.”

We had gotten into a conversation about the Go Kart track in town and how I knew which one was the fastest and I couldn’t be beat. He disagreed that he couldn’t beat me. We made plans to go race after the wedding.

“I haven’t forgotten. I’m currently in training, Hollywood. You’re out of your league.”

My phone beeped, and I pulled it back to see Jimmy’s number flashing across the screen. Why would Preston’s little brother be calling me?

“Um, Jason, I gotta go. I’ve got a call on the other line I need to take.”

“All right, Bama. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Bye,” I replied before clicking over.

“Jimmy?”

“It’s Brent.”

“Brent, are you okay?”

“I’m okay, but Momma’s been asleep for a real long time, and we can’t wake her up. I called Preston and he didn’t answer. Jimmy isn’t home yet from school, and I don’t know if I should call 911.”

I ran back toward the parking lot for my car. “How long has she been asleep?” I asked.

“Since yesterday morning.”

Oh no.

“Weren’t you at school yesterday and today? Could she have gotten up while you were at school?”

That had to be it.

“No, she hasn’t moved. At all.”

“Okay, Brent. I’m on my way right now. I want you to call 911 when we hang up, and tell them this exact same thing, okay? Then you and Daisy sit together in the living room. I’ll be there in about five minutes. Be waiting on me.”

“She’s dead, ain’t she?”

How did I tell this little boy his mother was very likely dead? That or in a coma.

“We don’t know that. She could just be sleeping a long time. You call 911. I’m on my way. Is Daisy okay?”

“Yeah, she’s sitting here beside me.”

“Good. You keep her right there with you. See you in a minute.”

“Okay, bye.”

He disconnected the line, and I dialed Preston’s number. It rang three times, then went to voice mail.

“It’s Preston. You know what to do.”

“Preston, it’s Amanda. Brent just called me. Your mother hasn’t woken up in two days. They’re worried. I had him call 911, and I’m on my way over there. Call me as soon as you get this.”

I ended the call and gunned the engine.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Preston

A loud banging sound interrupted my dreams. I tried to block it out. I wasn’t ready for this dream to end. Amanda was laughing and running down the beach while I chased her. She didn’t hate me. She still loved me. The banging was joined with a ringing noise and some yelling. I peeled open my eyes and glanced over at the clock. It was four in the afternoon. I’d slept all day. I hadn’t gotten home from work until almost four this morning. Then I’d been too jacked up on coffee to sleep. It had been almost seven before I crashed. I had to go back to work at eight tonight.

The banging reminded me of why I was awake. I stumbled out of bed and made my way to the door before whoever was on the other side beat it down.

I jerked it open to see Marcus standing on the other side. “Shit, man, I was getting ready to break the door down. I’ve been calling you, and then banging on this door for over ten minutes when that didn’t work.”

“I was sleeping. I’m working nights now, you know.”

“That’s right. I forgot you worked last night. Listen, I need to tell you something, and I don’t know how you’re gonna take it, so you might want to sit down.”

This was not something you wanted to wake up to. “What is it?” I demanded. I didn’t need to sit down, I just needed to know.

“It’s your mom. She overdosed.” He paused and waited for a reaction from me.

“Did it kill her this time?” This wasn’t her first overdose.

Marcus placed his hand on my shoulder and let out a heavy sigh. “Yeah, man. It did.”

I turned and headed for my room to put on some clothes. The kids would need me. I slipped on some jeans and tried to figure out how I could fit all three kids in here and take care of them when I was working nights. Without my mom’s rent and utilities I’d have a little extra to hire a sitter.

“You okay?” Marcus asked from the doorway of my room.

“She was junkie, Marcus. It was bound to happen. I just need to get to the kids. They’re probably scared.”

The tightness in my chest surprised me. I wouldn’t grieve for this woman. She’d done nothing for me in my life. I swallowed the weak emotion from the little boy deep inside who had wanted his mother to love him. Even a little. I’d figured out long ago she never would. I wouldn’t shed a tear for her now.

“The kids are fine. Amanda has all three of them. They’re getting ice cream, then going to the park. She sent me to find you. There are custody issues you have to deal with.”

Amanda had the kids? How? Why? No matter how much they liked her, they would have called me first.

“How did Amanda know to get the kids?”

“Your younger brother called her. Told her your mom hadn’t woken up in two days, and Amanda left school and rushed over there. She also had him call 911 while he waited on her to arrive. They couldn’t reach you, so they called her.”

Brent had called Amanda. My chest hurt. All three kids had been upset when I’d had to tell them I wouldn’t be bringing Amanda around anymore. Daisy had even cried. But they’d known they could count on her when they couldn’t get me on the phone. A lump formed in my throat, and I grabbed my keys and headed for the door.

“I know she left you for the Stone guy, and I’m sorry about that, man.”

So that was what she had told him. She’d left me for Jason Stone. Was she even dating him, or had it just been her way to cover up the truth?

“You were right. I wasn’t good enough for her. She finally wised up and saw it too.” I opened the door and headed down the stairs. I couldn’t talk about this with Marcus. Not right now.

“For what it’s worth, she still cares about you. She was really upset about this, and she was worried sick over those kids.”

“The kids love her” was the only reply I had.

“But you don’t?”

I stopped and looked back at him. I’d told enough lies. I wasn’t going to keep on telling them just to make everyone feel better. “I’ll always love her. Always.” I jerked open the door to my Jeep and jumped inside. “Where am I going?” I asked.

“DHR is waiting on you at the trailer.”

I shifted into drive and took off.

I wouldn’t have to fight Momma for the kids now. She’d made it easy. I wasn’t exactly the best option as a parent, but anything was better than her. And I didn’t want them separated. I couldn’t let them go. I’d figure this out somehow.

Amanda

I held Daisy’s cotton candy ice-cream cone while she ran over to the slide to go down it another time. She alternated between taking a lick of her ice cream and sliding. The ice cream wasn’t going to last too much longer. The sun was getting the best of it.

“Has Preston called you yet?” Jimmy asked, taking the seat beside me.

“No, but my brother did find him, and he is at the trailer talking to the people who determine where you go. He’s an adult and your closest relative, so he should have no problem getting custody,” I assured him. Brent and Daisy were too young to think about the legal issues. But it was bothering Jimmy. He understood the courts had rules.

“What if he doesn’t want us full-time?” Jimmy asked.

“He will.”

“He never tried to take us from Mom.”

“Because she would have fought him on it, and he’d have lost. He was also afraid that he’d draw attention to the situation and they’d take all of you away from him and each other.”

Jimmy nodded. “Yeah, he explained that to me. I’m just worried that they will do it now.”

. My daddy was buddies with two of the three judges who could possibly hear this case. They played golf every Saturday morning and had since I was a little girl. If I had to go to my daddy and beg and plead with him for their help, I would.

“I promise you this will be okay.”

Jimmy sighed. “I hope so. You know, Daisy really misses you.”

“I miss her too. I’ve missed all three of you.”

Daisy came running back to me with a big grin on her face to take another few licks of her melting ice cream.

“You better stop and eat it, Daisy, before it just melts away,” Jimmy told her.

“It gives me headaches if I eat it too fast,” she replied.

Jimmy just smiled and kicked at a rock down by his feet.

“Amanda, is my momma in heaven?” Daisy asked.

I looked down at her little face. She was the first one to say anything about her momma’s death. The boys had acted like nothing important had happened. Brent was swinging by himself, and I was giving him his space. But he hadn’t brought up the fact that his mother was dead.

“I don’t know a lot about heaven, Daisy. I’d like to think that because she brought such amazing kids into this world, there was someplace nice she got to go once her life was over.”

I was pretty sure the woman was rotting in hell, but I wasn’t about to tell that to her seven-year-old daughter.

“I don’t know much about heaven eithaw. I just been to Sunday school a few times with my next-dowah neighbow.”

I’d grown up in church, and I still didn’t know a lot about heaven. “Church doesn’t have all the answers, Daisy. Sometimes the answer we need is in our heart. We just have to listen to it.”

Daisy looked down at her chest and frowned, then looked back up at me. “I’ve nevah heawed my hawt befowah.”

Jimmy chuckled beside me, and I smiled over at him.

“Listen real close, and you’ll finally hear something one day,” I told her.

She nodded, then spun around and ran back toward the slide.

Once she was far enough away, Jimmy looked at me. “Thanks for not telling her the truth.”