Just Make Him Beautiful (36 page)

“Well
,
I was just saying
…
I don’t know why we can’t get along. We used to be the best of friends
.
”

“Yeah, we were. Until you started fucking my man
.

She sucked her teeth.
“Well, he couldn’t have been much of your man if he wanted me
.
”

I wanted to take this bucket of water with suds
as I stood there at the kitchen sink
and dump it over her head. But I was curious to find out why she was doing what she was doing and who made the first move.

“Why
,
Robin
?
W
hy would you do that to a friend like me?”

“It wasn’t my intentions
,
Cam
.
I
t just happened
.
”
S
he
stood
up and
came
over to me
.

“Oh, so his dick just happened to fall in your pussy by accident
.
I
s that what you’re saying?”

“No
.
”

“So
,
how did it happen?”

She didn’t respond
,
but it seemed as though she was thinking.

“I’m listening.”

“Okay, you wanna know
?
I’ll tell you. Remember that day you called me and told me you had moved in with Keith?”

“Yeah
.
G
o on.”

“Well, I had been so busy with school
and with dating this guy
,
you and I
hadn’t
had much
time together
. A
nd my mom
had
told me that you had stopped by to see me
a few times
,
but I was never there
. So, this one day, I really needed to talk to you
because the guy I was dating had been killed.
I was
so
upset that
I came by here to see
if
you
were
here
,
but you weren’t
.
Keith answered the door and
remembered who I was
.
He
invited me in to wait for you.
He saw how upset
I
was
.
I
started talking to
him
about it
,
and he began comforting me
. A
nd one thing led to another
.
”

“Oh, so now I’m supposed to feel sorry for you?” I asked
,
looking at her crocodile tears.

“No, but I thought you would be a little more understanding
.”

“Understanding?
Girlfriend, if you want me to be a little bit more understanding, you need to move out
, leave my man alone
,
and carry yo
’
fat ass back home
.
”

“But I love him
,
and he loves me!” she screamed, as the tears continued to pour down her face.

“
Chile
boo, you don’t know what love is,” I said
,
getting in her face.

“Whoa
!”
Keith
walked
into the kitchen.
He looked at Robin then at me.
“W
hat the hell
’s
going on?”

“Nothing
.
” I began to move the kitchen table to the side
,
so I could start scrubbing the floor.

“Robin, what’s going on
,
babe?”
he asked
,
wiping away her fake tears.

“Nothing
,
babe
.”
She hugged him.
“
I’m just feeling a little emotional right now
,
that’s all.
How was your night
?
”

“It was good, it was good,” he answered
,
hugging her back.

“Keith, when you get a chance, I really need to talk to you about something.”
I started slinging a wet mop across the floor, splashing them both.

He quickly moved out of my way.
“Sure
.
W
assup
,
shawty
?
”

“We can talk later,” I said, rolling my eyes at Robin.

“Well, whatever you gotta say to me, you can say in front of Robin. We are one big happy family, aren’t we?”
He took
a drink out of the refrigerator.

“Hmmm, so we are,” I said
,
wanting to throw up. “Look, this is a big house
,
and I have been trying my best to keep it clean. Nobody around here helps me do that. I do most of the cooking as well as the cleaning and I’m tired
.
”

Keith chuckled.
“
W
hat do you want me to do
,
shawty
?
H
elp?”

“No, I wanna hire a maid
.
” I wip
ed
the sweat from my forehead.

“A maid?”

“Yes, a maid. Someone who com
es in a few times a week
.
T
hey cook, they clean, you pay them
,
and they go home. I can’t keep doing this by myself
.
”

“Yes
,
Keith,
” Robin chimed in,
trying to get on my good side.
“
I think that’s a good idea
.
”

I swear, that bitch just don’t know.

“Okay, why not. Hire us a maid
,
s
hawty
.
”
Keith
pick
ed
Robin up and carr
ied
her upstairs with him.

Well, I can’t say that him taking her upstairs didn’t bother me because it did and not because of jealousy or personal feelings. I guess it was a matter of Keith preferring her
over me
most of the time.

I was happy that Keith had agreed that I could hire a maid
.
I couldn’t wait to call
M
omma in the morning to let her know.
Honey, y
ou talking
about
Guess Who’s Coming
to Dinner
.
H
ow about, “Guess
who
’
s
cooking dinner
?
”

Chapter 20

T
oday was the day Momma was to come by in full disguise and meet the one big happy family.
The only thing Keith didn’t want the maid to know was that
he swung both ways. So
,
Robin was to play his wife
,
and I was
to play her
cousin from
California
. Whateva
.

Anyway, Momma was going to be Ms. Annabelle Stewart from
Columbia
,
South Carolina
,
and she had been staying here in
Omaha
for the past
eleven
years
taking care of her son and his family.
Chile
, I
was
hop
ing
I
could
remember all this shit. Anywho, I had
asked
Keith and Robin to be here at the house by
five
p
.
m
.
because Ms. Stewart would
be
stop
ping
by to formally meet them.

The three of us sat in the living room drinking a glass of wine and chitchatting while waiting on Momma. Of course
,
I didn’t have much to say
.
I was so nervous
,
I kept looking at the clock on the wall every two seconds.

Suddenly, the
intercom buzzed
,
and I almost peed on
myself
.
I pressed the button to open the gate because I knew it wasn’t anyone else but Momma.

“That must be Ms. Stewart
,
” I said
,
trying to sound cheerful. I got up and answered the front door.

Chile
, I opened the door
,
and my mouth fell open.
The woman that stood in front of me looked nothing like my mother. She had on this old, tired, gray
-
ass wig
,
which looked like she had
it
on backwards
,
and a brown
plaid church mother dress
.
A
nd to top things off, she had on these black orthopedic quarter
inch
-
heel shoes.
I swear, Momma looked like she was every bit of
sixty
years old.

She first looked at me, smil
ing
and wink
ing.  She
said with
a strong
S
outhern draw
l
, “Hello
,
Mr. Jenkins
.
I
t’s
so
nice seeing you again.”

“Same here
,
Ms. Stewart
.
”
I let her in
,
trying my best not to laugh.
“Ms. Stewart, let me introduce you to my cousin Robin and her
h
usband Keith.”

“It’s nice to finally meet you
,
Ms. Stewart,” they both said in unison
.

“Aw, it’s so nice to meet you young chirren, but y’all don’t have to call me Ms. Stewart
.
J
ust call me Momma
.
T
hat’s what e
’
rybody calls me
, yup.
”

I invited Momma to have a seat on the couch and offered her something to drink as well.

“Yes
,
baby, I’d like to have a glass of ice cold water if ya got it.
Now, you don’t half to go ta no trouble on my account
,
but
when you get my age
,
ya have ta make sho all ya fluids are running. So
,
I drink water e
’
ry chance I get, you know
.
Well, I guess you young
’u
ns don’t know
. O
h well.”

I went to the kitchen to get Mo
mma
some ice water and
was
crack
ing
up.
Momma was putting on a true performance.
I couldn’t believe it was her
.
I
f she could fool me, I knew she could fool Robin as well.

I got back into the living room with Momma’s water.

Keith asked,
“Ms. Stewart
…
I mean
,
Momma
,
h
ow old are you?”

“I’m
sixty-two
years young
,
baby
.
”

“Well, don’t you think you’re a lil too old?”
he
asked.

“H
ell
naw
,
baby
.
I’m as
lively
as they come.
You wanna race out to da gate?” Momma asked in a serious tone
,
standing up and challenging Keith.