Karen D. Badger - Yesterday Once More (27 page)

“And didn’t you and Susan... you know?”

“Did we have sex? Yes, of course.”

“Okay, I’m having a little problem processing this one.” Andi looked at Jordan. “Forgive me for being a little uncomfortable with this, but we’re talking about oral sex here, right?” Andi waited for confirmation before continuing. “Did she ever do it to you?”

“She tried, but like I said, I have no sensation below the waist. I always felt uncomfortable with her doing it because I couldn’t give her the response she was looking for. I mean, I couldn’t even feel her mouth on me, never mind any potential orgasm.”

“So was your love making one-sided?”

Jordan sat back in her chair and sighed. “In the beginning she was pretty persistent, but after a while she gave up, and yes, at that point, it was pretty one-sided.”

“That must have sucked for you.”

“Yes and no. I would have loved to have felt those waves of orgasm I’ve read about in so many books, but on the other hand, it was something I had never experienced before, so I guess I didn’t know what I was missing. I still don’t know. I mean, I understand the physiology behind an orgasm, but I have no idea how it feels.”

“Did you ever experiment with masturbation before your accident?”

Jordan could feel her face reddening. “Of course I did, but it was so long ago, I don’t remember how it felt, and I certainly didn’t know enough about it to reach orgasm. I lived a pretty sheltered life.”

“Have you talked to Peter about it?” 

Jordan raised her eyebrows. “Would you talk to Peter about sex?”

“Hell, no, are you kidding? Oh, right. I see your point.”

“That’s why I need to talk to you.”

“I’m not sure how much I can help you.”

Jordan placed her hand on Andi’s. “Andi, you’re a woman, a woman in a relationship. Don’t tell me you don’t orgasm with Kale because I can hear you guys loud and clear.”

Andi turned red to the roots of her hair. “Oh, my God. Tell me you can’t!”

“I can share a few examples with you, if you’d like,” Jordan teased.

Andi’s blush deepened. “No, spare me. I believe you.”

Jordan leaned in closer. “So, tell me—what does it feel like?”

“What does sex feel like, or what does an orgasm feel like?”

“Both.”

“Well, there’s sex and then there’s making love. Having sex is one hundred percent physical, but for me, making love is twenty percent physical and eighty percent emotional. The experience is so much better when you’re in love. And if you’re really lucky, you will not only be in love, but you’ll connect with your partner on a deeper level.”

Jordan frowned. “Does that make the orgasm better?”

Andi smiled. “Does it make it better? Oh, yeah! Kale and I share a connection I’ve never felt before in my life. The first time I laid eyes on him, I felt as though someone had punched me in the stomach. Each time I had to work beside him in the lab, the need to touch him was so strong it felt as if I were magnetically drawn to him. Before we got together, I would lie in bed at night and nearly have an orgasm just thinking of him. He was all I could think about. I would make excuses just to be in the same room with him. When he was near, I felt an overwhelming urge to touch him, to map his body with my fingertips. I was driving myself crazy with desire. Thank God it didn’t take much to convince Peter to let me work on the project with him. It makes me laugh now when I think how we wasted time skirting around trying not to look too obvious.”

Andi drifted away, lost in thought.

Jordan waved a hand in front of Andi’s face. “Hello? Earth to Andi.”

“Oops. Sorry about that. Where was I?”

“You were describing how connecting on a higher level makes the experience better,” Jordan reminded her.

Andi smiled. “Oh, yeah. It’s so much better when you connect with the person on an emotional or spiritual level. It makes the intensity of the orgasm greater, especially if you can reach orgasm together. It’s the emotional connection that qualifies it as making love rather than just having sex. Making love for me means sharing not only my body, but my heart, mind, and soul. For me, the moment of orgasm represents not only a physical release, but a state of synchronicity. You become one with your partner. You literally lose yourself in that person.”

“You lose yourself? How?” Jordan asked.

“Imagine for a moment that not only is the burning sensation in your abdomen, it’s also in your mind and your heart. Imagine the intensity of passion, both physical and emotional, amplified a thousand times over. Imagine nearly losing consciousness while your mind disconnects and is overtaken by a state of pure sensory intensity as wave upon wave of pleasurable spasms ripple through your body. Imagine being able to feel your partner’s heartbeat blend with your own, almost to the point where you swear there is only one heart between you. Imagine the final moments of release being so intensely emotional that it brings you to tears. Imagine lying together afterwards, listening to his heartbeat returning to normal as you feel every cell in his body scream out love for you. That, Jordan, is making love.” 

The intensity of Andi’s description made Jordan’s breath catch in her throat and her eyes turn misty. “Thank you, Andi. I understand so much more now. If it’s even half as wonderful as you describe, it’s an experience I look forward to. Thank you.”

Andi smiled and nodded, but remained silent.

Jordan grinned. “Go on, get out of here. He’s watching the football game, but I think he can be convinced to change his plans.”

Andi laughed heartily. “Okay, I’ll go, but on one condition.”

“What’s that?” Jordan asked.

“That you wear earplugs when you go to bed tonight.”

* * *

The next morning, Jordan rode to the lab with Kale and Andi to begin working on the self-powered energy storage unit. Peter greeted them at the door.

“Good morning,” Jordan said lightly.

Peter bent over and placed a light kiss on Jordan’s head. “Good morning, Jordan.” He shook hands with Kale and Andi. “It’s good to see all of you this morning—especially you, Jordan. Are you up to helping us collect baseline data for the new power pack?”

Jordan grinned. “That’s why I’m here. Point me in the right direction.”

Peter looked at Kale and Andi. “You’re welcome to come along if you’d like.”

“Actually, we’re helping Chuck write the code for the energy storage unit this morning, so maybe we’ll catch up with you later,” Kale said.

“Okay then. We may have some information for you to use in that code by the end of the day.”

* * *

“All right, Jordan, our goal is to digitally record the electrical activity of your muscles in order to determine your body’s normal patterns for generating electrical currents when your muscles are active.”

Jordan listened carefully to Peter’s explanation as he attached the electrodes to the skin above her hip flexors and quadriceps muscles on her legs. “There’s only one thing about this theory that concerns me.”

“What’s that?”

“What happens while I’m sleeping or just sitting still? It almost sounds as though my muscles have to be in motion in order to generate these electrical impulses.”

“That’s a very good question. Andi came up with the solution: building additional storage capacity into the power pack, similar to how solar panels work. Energy generated while you’re physically active can be stored and used on demand at times when physical activity is low.”

“Let me see if I have this straight. When the new, self-generating power pack is ready, it will be surgically inserted and the external power supply will be removed. Then, after a time, when feeling actually returns, the self-powered pack will also be removed, and I will basically be cured. Did I leave anything out?”

Peter smiled. “I’d say your explanation is adequate. Now, I’m sure the question on your mind is how long will this healing process take?”

“You took the words right out of my mouth.”

“By the time we install the new energy pack, the implant will have been in for about two weeks. Although improbable in your case, it is conceivable that there might be a slight amount of feeling returning by then.”

“Two weeks? Wow, I didn’t realize it could work that fast.” 

“Whoa, slow down there. I said it was conceivable. Your injury is sixteen years old. While it’s possible that feeling could return quickly, I don’t believe it will actually happen that way for you. In your case, I estimate it might take upwards of a year or more.”

Jordan’s eyes opened wide. “A year?”

“Or more,” Peter repeated. “You need to be realistic about this. Although your muscles haven’t atrophied, the injury site has remained unchanged for the past sixteen years. The odds in favor of a speedy recovery would be so much higher if the injury were fresh. You’ve been aware of that fact right from the beginning of the R&D on this project.”

Jordan sat dejectedly for several moments before looking at Peter. She sighed deeply. “I know you’ve warned me about this, but damn it. We’re so close, and this has been so frustrating. I’m really hoping things will happen quickly.”

“I won’t lie to you. Do I think the new implant will work? Yes, I do. It might take longer for you than for someone with a new injury. It’s up to you whether you want to proceed or not.”

Jordan closed her eyes and fought back tears of frustration. As she looked inward for the courage to go on, a vision of creamy skin, curly red hair, and green eyes came into view. An intense feeling of peace suddenly filled her heart.

Jordan opened her eyes. “Let’s do it. I can’t give up now. I have a date to keep with a wild Irish rose.”

Peter frowned, but he motioned for the lab technician to approach. “All right then. I think you’ve made the right decision. Jason here will take you to the rehab center where you’ll be hooked up to the oscilloscope and then put on a recumbent bike. You’ll be there for a couple of hours. After that, you’re free to go home.”

Kale led Andi by the hand toward the barn. “I’m so glad Jordan was too tired to join us tonight.”

“It seems the time she spent in the rehab center today took more out of her than she thought it would. She nearly fell asleep at the dinner table,” Andi said.

“Regardless of why, I’m just glad she chose to go to bed early.”

Andi grinned shyly. “Why this sudden need to be alone?”

“Because I don’t want her involved in the initial time travel testing with the non-human subjects.” Kale glanced at Andi, who had fallen silent. He thought for a moment and realized that she might have been hoping for a different explanation. “Ah, sheesh, Andi. I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just that Jordan can be a real pain when it comes to following the scientific method. When she thinks it’s in her best interest, she cuts corners like crazy.” Kale watched Andi’s face carefully. His heart sank when his explanation didn’t alleviate her disappointment. “Andi, you know that I love you, and you know that I love being alone with you.”

Andi smiled at him. “Oh, hell. You’re just too damn cute to stay angry with. Come on, let’s get some work done. You can make it up to me later tonight.”

* * *

Andi’s heart was in her throat as she watched the platform carefully. “Kale, stop the rings and put them in reverse. The rodent is gone.”

Kale loaded the retrieval algorithm.

“God, Kale. My heart is beating a mile a minute,” Andi admitted. “I hope the little guy survives the transfer.”

“Here goes,” Kale announced as the rings began to spin once more. “Countdown to surge. Nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one... surge!” The computer initiated the counteractive wave. Seconds later, an object appeared on the platform.

“Power down,” Andi said. “It’s back.”

Andi ran to the machine before the rings came to a complete stop and stared at the object on the platform. She was still staring when Kale joined her a few moments later.

“Damn,” Kale said. “Damn it all to hell.”

On the platform was the cage, and at its bottom lay the lifeless body of the rat.

Kale turned abruptly and walked to the control console. He powered down the system. Andi remained where she was.

“That’s it. It’s over. I’m not going any further with this thing. It’s too risky. Jordan can be pissed as hell at me if she wants to, but at least she’ll be alive to be angry.”

Kale threw a drop cloth over the console. “I’m going into the house. Are you coming?”

“Power the computers back up. I think I know why the rat died.”

“You know why the rat died? Okay, I’m game. Why?”

“Take a close look. What do you notice about the rat?”

Kale stared at the animal. “Help me out here. I don’t see anything unusual.”

“Touch it.”

Kale reached into the cage. He pulled his hand back almost immediately. “It’s hot,” he said. “Well, I’ll be. We forgot to ground it.”

Andi smiled. “That’s right. We grounded the cage, but didn’t ground the rat to the cage. I’m surprised it didn’t spontaneously combust.”

Kale kissed Andi full on the lips. “You’re a genius. Do you think we have time tonight for one more trial?”