Kasey Screws Up the World (29 page)

My heart sank. “She fell? Did she get hurt?”

Erika must have seen the panic on my face because she flicked at the air. “If she did, couldn’t have been too bad. She came back, right?”

I sucked on my lower lip. I had a feeling Lara would come back even if her bone was sticking straight out of her skin.

“So will you help me convince her to leave?”

I knew one way to get her to never come back to this class. I took a deep breath, mustering up all my courage. “I’ll join your class.”

I paid my tuition. Another five hundred freaking dollars drained from the family bank account. At least now I could look Mom in the eye when I claimed I was the one who drained it.

The polished floor felt cold underneath my feet as I padded toward my sister.

“What are you doing here?” we both asked each other at the same time. The attitude and volume of her voice drowned out my soft, concerned one.

The other girls snapped their heads in our direction and ended their mild chatter.

“How many classes have you taken?” I sat cross-legged next to Lara on the floor, diverting my eyes to the eavesdroppers a few feet away.

She ignored me.

“Better question. How many have you been kicked out of? Erika told me you fell last week. You don’t need to push yourself if you’re not ready. Heal some more first.”

Lara didn’t react at all, but the other girls inched closer to us.

I lowered my voice. “So what if you lost your scholarship, you can still reapply.”

She snapped her head toward me. “And you wonder why I had to get away from you. To stop you from going through my stuff.” A tear slid down her cheek. She wiped it away so slowly, it looked like it took great effort to move her arm. What had happened to her between the party and now when she had so much anger inside her, she had projected it onto the entire dance team? Now it seemed like she barely had enough energy to sigh at me.

Erika turned on the music. Loud beats pumped through the speakers. The other girls separated and took their spots in line. Lara’s elbows locked and quivered as she pushed herself off the floor. I stood and offered her my hand but she refused. The other girls sidestepped in place, warming up.

“At least you kept that a secret from Mom and Dad.” Lara turned to face the front of the room, raising her feet about a centimeter off the ground while the other girls lifted their knees to their chests.

“And from the blog. This is just between you and me.”

“Good.”

The dancers touched the floor side to side. My own hips started to sway to the rhythm. I planted my feet firmly on the floor, forcing all my weight into keeping my legs as stiff as tree trunks. “Which you still haven’t read.”

“And I’m not going to.”

The warm up ended and Erika transitioned into harder moves, all involving swiveling hips, graceful arms, and high kicks. I wrapped my arms around my chest to prevent them from getting any ideas. As the other girls knocked out every move with gusto, I wondered if I was as good as them. They had the finesse but they lacked the flare I knew I could give the steps. They kept glancing back at Lara. Checking on her. To see if she would fall.

Lara’s hip movements resembled a first time hula hooper who didn’t understand the dynamics of how to keep the circle up. I knew I could dance better than her now and that was the most devastating realization of all.

I swallowed hard. “There’s one thing I don’t understand. Why pretend to go to college?” Maybe if I knew her motive, I could use that as a way to convince her to help me with the fundraiser.

The dancers squatted while Lara only drooped her shoulders forward. My hips descended at the insistence of gravity, but I fought it and pulled myself back upright before Lara noticed.

Lara sighed. “It’s only a half truth. I
am
taking classes. Dance ones. My hip is not going to heal by just waiting around. I have to push it, and when I do, they’ll give me back my scholarship. No one ever has to know I lost it to begin with.” She dipped lower, wincing in pain. A few heads snapped in her direction.

I wasn’t sure if Lara was lying to me or lying to herself. My skin prickled as evil thoughts betrayed my brain. If she was able to dance again, maybe I could too. But that dream was as unrealistic as me thinking I could ever be good enough for Broadway.

“Everyone thinks this is a minor injury. Even Jules and Ali. When I’m as good as new, no one will know the truth.”

“Why’d you stop going to Physical Therapy then?”

“How do you know that?” Lara increased the vigor in her arm movements. At least they hit the beat and showcased some of her talent. But she looked like a conductor, leading an orchestra while the rest of her barely moved.

“Lara. Look at you, you’re in pain. This isn’t working. You need to see a doctor.”

“I’m fine. This is nothing compared to what I’m used to.” Staring at me, she stomped her foot too hard, with too much gumption. Her lips quivered as she tried to fight through the pain to prove some unnecessary point to me.

I couldn’t let her keep hurting herself like that. And so I said the clincher. “You’re not as good as them anymore.” I gestured around the room at the girls who followed Erika’s steps like mirror images, while Lara performed like a fuzzy and faded carbon copy.

“Yes. I am. I will be.” Lara bent her body like an extortionist to match the low dips Erika demonstrated at the front of the room. “I have to be.” Her legs wobbled, but she kept going, leaping into a split and stretching her bad leg as far as it would go. Crying out in pain, she landed on her butt with a thud and another scream.

The whole room stopped to stare at her. I bent over her to shield their vision as much as possible.

She reached out and grabbed my arm. She must be desperate. Her other hand clutched her hip. She stared at me with undulating pupils, her eyes saying, “
Don’t go away.”
My heart broke. How could I ask her to be involved in the fundraiser if it would mean giving up on her dream and replacing it with a new one? I grabbed her hand and suddenly the moment was all too familiar. Me, holding onto her, promising not to let go. She must have come to the same realization because her eyes widened and she dropped my hand like it had scorched her.

My heart felt heavy in my chest.

The other girls gathered around us. “Are you okay?” one of them asked, but the rest looked like they just stepped onto a stage in front of a packed audience and forgot the choreography. “Not this again,” another scoffed.

Beside me, Lara sniffled, obviously fighting back tears of pain.

Erika cut the music. “Drinks and bathrooms everyone. Chop chop.”

The other girls left the room, gathering in the doorway instead. Erika clapped her hands and the girls dispersed into the hallway. Then, she approached us.

She touched Lara’s shoulder. “Are you all right?”

Lara tried to nod, but her face squished in pain.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t let you stay in this class.” She stood up and removed her hand.

Lara nodded as if she’d been expecting it. And judging by the amount of money she’d blown on other failed classes, this outcome was inevitable.

“You go get yourself healed and we’ll talk again in the spring.” Erika gave me a pleading look and I understood the hidden meaning.
Get her out of here.

Lara allowed me to help her up, and she leaned on me as we trudged to the street.

“I’m taking you to the hospital,” I said. “Wait here while I call a cab.” I had to prove to her that I could be there for her. That I wouldn’t abandon her again.

“No!” She gripped me harder, digging her nails into my shoulder. “I can’t. Mom and Dad will find out.”

“Is that so bad?”

“For me it is. Please, Kasey.” Her face was a mixture of pain and desperation. “Bring me home. I’ll ice it. I’ll be fine. If I’m not, you can make me go later.”

I bit my lip and took a deep breath. Now was as good a time as any to tell her about my idea to help her. Really help her. “Lara, I know how to help you, but—”

“Well, one good thing came out of the cruise, I guess,” she said while a cab pulled up beside us. At least she initiated the conversation for once. Though I suspected this was her way of distracting me from bringing her to the hospital.

“What?” I played along. I couldn’t help myself.

“It seems your spy skills have really improved. Finn deserves props for that.”

I couldn’t be sure, but I thought I detected the slight hint of humor in her voice. This was the most progress we’d had in months. All this time I’d been avoiding her, throwing gifts and money at her to bribe her forgiveness. Interrogating her with questions. But what she really needed was for me to be there for her.

It was too soon to end her dream for her once again. I needed to take after Lara, small steps, not big ones.

I WAITED IN SPANISH class with a giant package for Lonnie. I patted the cell phone in my pocket, just to make sure it was still there. Still no reply from Finn. I didn’t care if Señora Ferrara caught me with it. It was my lifeline.

When Lonnie walked into the room, I held the giant package up in the air, huffing at the weight of it. Our classmates whistled at me as they swiveled in their chairs to hear his reaction.

Lonnie frowned while he weaved through the maze of desks to the back of the room. “I was afraid of that.”

I leaned the guitar against his desk so the giant red bow faced outward. Just another ATM transaction in a long list I still had to pay back. “Usually when someone gives you an expensive gift, you thank them.”

“I knew this was going to happen as soon as I read your last post. FYI, I knew you were the one who broke my guitar. It was pretty obvious by the bloodstains on the wood. Plus, you had an audience.” He gravitated toward the guitar, then stopped himself and pulled back his shoulders. “And here I thought you were going to mend my heart.”

“I am. Except…not with me.” I swallowed hard. I had to let Lonnie go, even if the possibility of Finn remained only in the past. “I just want to be friends.”

“And friends we are.” He nodded, seemingly agreeing with me, but the look in his eyes said he wanted to add “and benefits” to that declaration.

“Just take it, man,” someone called out from the front of the room.

Lonnie picked up the guitar. Everyone cheered. He set it back down beside his desk.

“Aren’t you even going to look at it?”

“I can see it’s an electric by the shape.” He unearthed a pen from his messenger bag. “I want the moment we first meet to be private. I could very easily fall in love and I don’t want to go all ooey gooey in front of them.” He nodded toward the other students in the room, then leaned in to me. “It would ruin my street cred.”

“Speaking of ruining your street cred…” I unzipped the guitar case. “It’s pink!”

The students near us snickered. Lonnie blinked. “You bought me a pink guitar. Seriously?”

I patted Lonnie on the shoulder. “Had to figure out a way to get you to stand out.”

“My music’s supposed to do that.”

“Plus this one was on sale.” I strummed the strings. “Come on, she’s beautiful, isn’t she?” I leaned in to whisper in his ear. “Denise’s favorite color is pink.”

Lonnie looked horrified. I laughed.

“You’re going to look so good playing this guitar at the fundraiser in two weeks.”

He raked his hand through his messy hair. “What fundraiser?”

“The one that’s going to fix everything.” I patted Lonnie’s arm. “How would Aixelsyd feel about a comeback performance?”

Just as I headed to the subway to go home, I felt the familiar staccato vibration of a new email. I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, causing pedestrians to maneuver around me, and yanked my phone from my pocket.

My eyes bugged out at the site of Finn’s email address.

My fingers chose this moment to become sweaty from the late summer heat. I had to push several times before the email popped up on my screen. It was even more cryptic than mine.

You’re asking the wrong question.