Keep Me (Shelter Me #3) (10 page)

Seriously, please don’t be angry, Shelby. Right now you’re thinking, how dare they do this to me? And you’re right. How dare any of us tell you what to do. You have always been so headstrong, confident, a woman who always had her life planned out. I am so proud of the woman you have become, but for once in your life I want you to be free and blow with the wind. Have fun, experience things you never have before. And I don’t mean having sex. If and when you do, it should be on your terms, and only when you are ready. I love you, my baby sister. Please accept this gift. It was our mother’s. When Grandma gave it to me several years ago, I knew it was meant to be yours, not mine. You’ll know why when you see it. Have the time of your life.

Love Always,

Erin

Tears sting the back of my eyes. I’m unable to control them any longer as they slowly roll down my face. I set the card down and rip the paper off the package with more force than necessary. I know what’s in this box; it’s the necklace I used to wear and play with as a little girl.

When I open the box, my hands roam across the three small silver hearts trailing along a long silver chain. My lips quiver as I suck in air and close my eyes, recalling the day my mom caught me wearing it. I was so young when my parents passed away, but this necklace is one of the things I vaguely remember about them. My dad had given this to my mom the day she brought me home from the hospital. The day she caught me wearing it, she sat me down and told me its story.

The three hearts represented my mom, Erin, and me. Dad had told her the three of us held his heart in the palm of his hands. Of course I was too young to understand what this necklace really represents, but at this very moment, it means everything to me. It’s the true meaning of love executed in the most delicate and simplest of ways. This gift from my sister could not have come at a better time in my life with all the issues I have going on in my head. I feel so empty and alone.

Carefully taking the necklace out of the box, I hold it up into the light and watch the three hearts dangle gracefully on the chain, recalling how beautiful I always thought they looked hanging around my mother’s dainty neck. And now I have it. Unhooking the clasp, I stand up and walk to the long mirror against the wall. Bringing my hands around the back of my neck, I fasten it in place.

“It’s perfect,” I whisper to myself as it lays just an inch or so above the center of my chest.

I gaze at it a little longer. It’s then and there I realize what’s been disturbing me for months now, tormenting and consuming my days and nights, can’t hurt me anymore. Nothing and no one can hurt me unless I let them. I will be damned if I will let what happened when I killed Joel bring me down. Nor will I let the fact that I have never again felt like a whole woman after the doctor gave my grandmother and me that horrifying news about myself years ago continue to haunt me, either. For once, I am going to live for myself. There is no reason in the world I should be alone.

A joyous smile spreads clear across my face as I think about the next ten days with Antonio. My eyes move to the clock and grow wide when I notice the time. I kick my ass in gear with more excitement and anticipation for the journey to come than I have ever felt in my life.

Chapter Eleven

Antonio

So used to being strong, suave, and confident in going after whatever the hell I wanted my entire life, I woke up this morning with my nerves intensifying like a fucking teenager ready to touch a woman for the first damn time. I’ve been questioning myself all morning long as to why I am freaking out. The answer is simple. Shelby is going to kick my ass. One thing I know about her is, she doesn’t take kindly to being told what to do. The woman is so damn stubborn. She always seems like she’s in control of everything she does.

A piece of advice my brother Luke gave me this morning snaps its way into my mind. How that little fucker got so damn smart is beyond me. His words sunk in, that’s for damn sure.

‘It isn’t necessarily a bad thing to be tensed up about Shelby being pissed off at you, bro. Look at it as a good thing. If her reaction to this has you sweating like a damn pig and talking senselessly, then she is so fucking worth it.’

How right he is. He should know better than anyone about going after the person you want. Eight years ago when Luke had to leave Shayne behind, it fucked my little brother up in a bad way. I shake those disturbing thoughts out of my head as fast as I can. Forbidding myself to even go there anymore, I focus on the good.

Shelby. She is so damn worth it. No woman has ever made me nervous, with palms sweating and weak knees, like she does. These past four months have been torture not having her near me, and now that she is here, I am consumed with being in her presence. Securing my suitcases in the back of my truck, I make my way around the front and hop into the warmed-up vehicle. God, I hope I am doing the right thing here.

It is snowing when I pull out of my garage. I back slowly out of my drive after making sure my garage door closes, securing my house for the next ten days. Shelby will most likely hate the fact that we are getting more snow, which makes me one happy fucking man.

Every time she gripes and complains about the snow and how cold it is, I am going to shut her up by kissing her, since she admitted herself that kissing her would be the only way to make her shut her mouth. I plan on do a hell of a lot of kissing her, every damn chance I can get.

Those lips of hers are sexy as hell; all pouty, full, and soft. My cock jerks in my jeans with a vision of Shelby taking me in her mouth and wrapping her puckered lips all the way around my shaft. Then the sensible part of my brain slaps the other side silly, knowing that if anything sexual happens between the two of us at all, it has to be she who becomes the aggressor and takes charge. No matter how hard it is for me to hold back, I have to. I care too much about her to push her into doing something she isn’t ready for.

“Fuck!”

This is going to be so damn hard, and I’m not talking about just my dick, either, although one look at that woman and he has a mind of his own, as if he can actually see how incredibly beautiful she is. I am talking more about not being the one in control; switching roles and giving her the power will more likely be the death of me.

My cell rings with the call from Markus I was expecting a while ago.

“Finally.”

“Sorry, it was a little crazy around there this morning with Shelby and Sierra both running around on a damn goose hunt trying to find everything Sierra wanted to take with her, and then Shelby going on and on about one thing or another. And Muppet barking like crazy. Trust me, I was ready to get my ass out of there hours ago. Dude, you
so
have your hands full with her. I pray like a mother you’re up for this challenge, because man, are you going to need it.”

I shrug.

“I can handle her.”

“No doubt in my mind you can.”

“Is she pissed?” I ask, wanting to be prepared.

“Royally.”

Of course she’s pissed.

“Great.”

“Like I said, you can handle her,” he chuckles.

“Listen, I have to make this quick. I am pulling into the airport now to drop off Shelby’s rental car before catching my flight, but there are a few things I want you to be prepared for before you go and hijack my girl for a week and a half.”

He pauses and my senses go on high alert. Something in his tone unsettles me. I don’t particularly like all the things he tells me when I pull off to the side of the road and listen intently without uttering one single word.

“Fucking hell,” is all I say when he’s done.

“One more thing, man. Shelby tries to act all tough on the outside, she’s been that way for as long as I have known her. Yeah, she has a mouth on her, one I have had to shut up a time or two, but my girl is hurting on the inside. Right now her dreams are tormenting her in a bad way. Shit, she is going to kill me for telling you any of this.”

Silence greets me on the other end of the line for several moments. I begin to wonder if I should say anything or not. Then Markus speaks again.

“Shelby’s been carrying around a burden on her shoulders since she was thirteen years old.”

“What are you trying to say, Markus? Is she sick?”

All kinds of shit is running through my head right now.

“No. Fuck, man. I shouldn’t have even said anything. This is her story to tell, not mine. The only reason I am saying anything at all is because I truly believe you care about her, and maybe you’re the medicine she needs. She’s too stubborn to let anyone help her, or even get close to her.”

Markus pauses thoughtfully for a moment before continuing.

“I know her, Antonio. You’re the first man she has ever talked about. You’re under her skin. Rest assured she is not sick, but this is a story she needs to tell you. I just want you to be prepared that there is a serious reason why she has never let herself get close to a man before. For her to take this giant leap with you tells me she’s caving against the promise she made to herself that she would never fall for anyone. Just don’t push her too hard. She will tell you when she’s ready.”

What the hell could she have learned at such a young age to make her swear off men? Whatever it is, you bet her sweet ass I am going to chase those evil spirits so far away from Shelby she will never fear anything again in her life.

Pulling up in front of Adam and Erin’s house, I see the garage door lift unexpectedly. I’ll be damned when Shelby is revealed standing in the garage with more bags on the floor than she will need. But the thing that really catches my eye is the big, excited looking smile all over her striking face. I give myself a disapproving look in my rearview mirror for the sensual thoughts roaming in my head.

“Asshole,” I complain to myself.

Truthfully I am shocked, even taken aback a little by her easygoing calm, cool and collected stance. I approach her after exiting my truck, leaving it running so it will stay nice and warm for the two of us.

“Good morning, Firecracker,” I greet her, my words a little cautious.

Even so, I’m ravenous to feast on her peach-colored, glossy lips. Fuck, she’s the most alluring and captivating woman I have ever laid my eyes on. She could hold me captive for the rest of my life and I would still be hypnotized by her. Eager to get moving, but driven to kiss her first, I bring her into my arms and secure my hands around her dainty waist as I sweep my mouth over hers briefly, needing to make sure she isn’t playing with my head with how cheerful she is.

“You’re not going to give me any lip or chew my ass out for springing this surprise on you?” I ask skeptically.

“Well, I could be angry and for valid reasons, I must say. However, the more I thought about spending time alone with you, the less angry I got.”

The sound of her words hitting my ears confuse and excite me at the same time.

“Did you call your sister?”

“Hell, no. When Markus first told me how all of you connived this little trip behind my back, I was pissed. I’m not going to lie to you and tell you I wasn’t. But the more I thought about it and the more Markus made me see things for what they really are, the more I knew he was right.”

Now I’m thoroughly mystified about what she and Markus discussed. I know he has been on my side all along, and there is so much he has told me in confidence about her and the things she has been through these last few months. Does she suspect that I know? I think not. If she did, there is no way in hell she would be standing here in the freezing ass dead of winter snugly in my arms.

“Where are we going?”

Her breath hitches as she hikes her long legs into the cab of my truck. My mouth salivates excessively like I have drunk a gallon of ice cold water as I pore over her lengthy limbs. I place the last of her bags in the backseat of my truck. This three hour drive is going to have my dick twisted like a damn hard pretzel by the time we get to our destination. Shutting the door, I don’t answer her until I have my seatbelt on and my balls aren’t lodged in the back of my throat.

“Luke and I own a small home in a town a few hours north from here right on Lake Michigan.”

I glance at her out of the corner of my eye to gauge her reaction. The corners of her mouth twitch and then lo and behold, a beaming smile spans her beautiful face.

“Oh, really? Your second home, huh?” she says a little snippily.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing. Never mind I said anything.”

She bends down and slips off her boots, then places her black sock-covered feet on the dash and leans her head back on her seat.

“Shelby. Five minutes ago you were excited about getting away with me. All I did was mention where we were going, so let’s not start this trip off with an attitude. If you don’t want to go, just say so.”

I may come off a little too sternly, but I don’t give a shit. She is not going to close up on me. Not this time, goddamn it.

I hear her let out a strangled huff, which has me on high alert. Checking my review mirror as calmly as I can, I switch lanes and pull off into a gas station, which has her placing her feet on the floor and sitting straight up, looking somewhat bewildered. The parking lot is completely empty, which is no surprise on this side of town, as the road ends about a mile up where you exit onto the highway.

“What are you doing? If we need gas, the pumps aren’t in the parking lot.”

“No shit. I hadn’t noticed,” I say wryly, cranking my head as if to be looking around for the gas pumps.

“I want to know what I did or said wrong because this is definitely not the way I want to start this off.”

Drawing in a deep gulp of air she turns to me hesitantly, in a barely there low voice as her eyes fill with tears and her lips tremble. What the hell is going on?

“Markus called me when I was on my way to pick you up.”

“What did he say?”

Her mood instantly changes like night and day as irritation drips from her voice.

“Shelby. Damn it. I feel like an asshole telling you this. Like, I know things about you that I shouldn’t, at least not until you’re ready to tell me.”

“I am about to tell you to turn this truck back around and take me home if you don’t tell me… wait. He promised me he would never tell anyone and he told you! That weasel! I am going to kill him!”

Snatching up her purse, she starts rifling through it, looking for what I assume is her phone.

“He’s more than likely either in the air right now or getting ready to be. Besides, he didn’t tell me a thing.”

“What? Then why did he call you?” she questions.

“That you work your fingers to the bone. And when you’re not at your restaurant, you’re at home. You’ve avoided all of your friends and you live like a hermit.”

The lawyer comes out in me and I just blurt everything right out, not giving her the chance to even speak.

“He said you’ve been holding a secret from everyone but him since you were thirteen years old, too.”

“God,” she whispers. “Those are my stories to tell, my secrets, my pain. Don’t you think?”

“Yes, I do. But I also think you underestimate everyone around you.”

She flashes an evil glare my way.

“I don’t underestimate people. They underestimate me. Ever since I have stepped off of that fucking plane, I have had people telling me I should do this, or I should do that, shoving it in my face. I am a grown woman who has been making my own choices for years now. Years! And then in one week, everyone around me all of a sudden knows what’s right and what’s best for poor little Shelby.”

She blows out a frustrated breath.

“Well, nobody knows what’s right for me, but me. Why can’t anyone see that? As for secrets, yes, I have them. Doesn’t everyone?”

I can’t seem to tear my gaze from her, not wanting to speak. I want her to get it all out, to finally open up to me. I want to be the one to take away her pain and suffering and make her whole again.

Pushing up the center console, I scooch over, grasping her hand in mine. I slide her hand up, kissing the palm. She needs to know I am here for her. She’s not alone. When our gazes lock, hers is filled with so much pain. I can read it so well, and right now she has her soul bared wide open to me.

“You don’t have to tell me a thing, but if you ever decide to take the weight off of those beautiful shoulders of yours and lean on someone else, I’ll be the first person standing in line.”