Kickass Anthology (13 page)

“The city’s annual marathon to support the local homeless LGBT youth shelters,” Jay said, reading the information at the top of the flyer. “It’s a great cause. Several of the other trainers have run in this marathon in the past. Do you want to sponsor someone?”

“No, I think I want to run in it myself,” Fin replied softly, slowly, as if testing out the words. They flowed from his lips without a hitch, and he felt a smile spread across his face. He said it again, louder and with confidence he could feel in his bones. “I want to run in the marathon, Jay.”

“You want to – what?” Jay stood there, blinking, for several heartbeats before he found his voice again. “You want to run a marathon. You, who was a total slacker just six weeks ago, want to run a race that is the ultimate test for runners. Do you even know how long a marathon is?”

“26.2 miles.” He rattled off the answer without missing a beat. “Although I did just read that on the flyer.”

“Do you have any concept of how great a distance 26.2 miles is? You almost keeled over after three miles just now.”

Fin made a show of looking around as if he’d lost something. “Where did my supportive ‘You can do anything you set your mind to’ boyfriend go?” Gesturing to stop a passerby, he asked, “Have you seen my boyfriend? He seems to have disappeared.” The passerby continued on her way after giving him a weird look, and he turned back to Jay. “Why is it so hard to believe that I want to do this? Have you finally lost faith in me, Jay? Is that it?”

“God, no, Fin. I have all the faith in the world in you.” Jay opened the glass door and took one of the flyers out of the stack tacked onto the noticeboard. “I’m just…surprised. And a bit doubtful, I admit.”

Fin allowed himself to be steered toward the front door of the gym when Jay snaked his arm around his waist and pulled him close. “Isn’t that kind of the opposite of what it means to have faith in someone?”

The corner of his mouth quirked up as Jay glanced at him. “Caught that, huh?” His gaze returned to the flyer, reading the important details more carefully. “It’s not that I doubt you, babe. You
can
do anything you set your mind to. I just doubt the possibility, and the safety, of you trying to run in this particular marathon.”

Oh, well, that is a different thing entirely.
Fin breathed a sigh of relief. Jay was his rock. He had been for more than fifteen years, but the last six weeks had seen him become something more…his cornerstone, his foundation. He hadn’t intended to become so dependent on his best friend and boyfriend, but there it was all the same.
I need him, in a way I’ve never needed anything or anyone else in my life. If I lost him, everything would fall apart again.

“When is it?”

“About six months from now.”

“Is it possible to train for a marathon in six months?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never trained for anything even remotely like that.”

“There have to be reputable online resources, right?” he asked, trying to keep hope alive.
I don’t know why this one or why now. I don’t know why that’s so important, but it is.
“And you said some of the other trainers have done this marathon. Maybe they would help.”

“Sure they would. We all support each other the best we can.”

“Talk to them, please.” Fin tried to keep the desperation out of his voice but knew he failed when he saw Jay’s furrowed brow. “Do it for me.”

Jay studied his face for a moment. “Why is this so important to you?”

“I have no idea. It just…it just is, that’s all I can say.” The furrowed brow accompanied by a frown clued him in to Jay’s deepening doubt. “I’m not keeping anything from you, I swear. But this is the goal I want to set for myself. I don’t understand why either. It just feels right.”

That phrase took him back to the morning after he spent his first night with Jay. It was obvious from his reaction that it had a similar effect on Jay. “Okay, babe, I’ll talk to them and get all the inside info I can. If this is a realistic goal, then we’re in it together.”

A less than manly squeal might have slipped from Fin’s lips, though no one except he and Jay heard it and Jay knew better than to ever mention it. He wrapped his arms around his boyfriend’s neck and kissed him hard. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

“I’m not sure I believe you. Better try again.”

This time, the kiss was slow and sensual, and Fin only just managed to stop himself from grinding against Jay in the front lobby of the establishment where he was employed. The gay members – and even a handful of the straight ones – were looking a bit hot and bothered by the time the two of them came up for air. Fin couldn’t help the grin taking over his face.

“Believe me now?” The rapid nod made Fin chuckle, and he reached between them to palm the bulge Jay was sporting. “Wish I could stay and help you take care of this, but I have to finish putting together the computer on the kitchen table. The neighbor is coming to pick it up this afternoon.”

“S’ok. I can rub one out in the shower. I have a client coming in soon anyway,” Jay replied, nudging his hand away from his crotch. “You enjoy your sauna-shower-rubdown combo, and I’ll see you at home later. With marathon training info in hand.”

“You better. That couch is really lumpy,” Fin teased as he spun away toward the sauna.

That evening, as Fin was putting the finishing touches on their dinner of lean chicken breasts, brown rice, and a colorful salad, Jay burst through the door and tripped over the gym bag he dropped in his rush to get inside. Fin hid a grin behind his hand at the uncharacteristic lack of grace. Jay recovered in the next breath, kicking his shoes off and running into the kitchen with a stack of papers in his hand.

He stopped when he noticed the table, cleared of its usual assortment of tech-related gadgets, parts, and tools, was set for a romantic dinner for two, complete with fresh flowers and candles. Each place was set with an artfully arranged entrée accompanied by a glass of red wine and a glass of water.

“Glad I showered before I came home,” Jay said, his voice sounding distant as he took in the rare sight.

“The roommate is out, so I thought it would be fun to have a date night. I followed the meal plan so no cheating on dinner or dessert, and we can stream a movie after, if you want.” When Jay remained wide-eyed and silent, Fin fumbled for words to explain. “I know we don’t usually do this, and I know it’s not as good as Jabba the Slug would have made – ”

“Stop it.” Jay silenced the verbal diarrhea with a kiss and a smile. “It’s beautiful. We should do date night more often.” Fin beamed at the suggestion and praise as Jay pulled him over to the stack of papers on the breakfast bar. “We have a reason to celebrate. I have good news.”

“The marathon?”

“Yeah, babe, it looks like we can do the marathon!”

“Oh my God, that’s awesome!”

Jay flashed his pearly whites as Fin did a happy dance around the kitchen. “It’s going to be a helluva lot of work, though. Hard work, Fin. Six months’ worth.”

“Right now…don’t care,” he shot back, shaking his ass in front of his boyfriend on purpose. “You spoke to the other trainers?”

“I did. A wellspring of information and inspiration, they were.”

“Okay, Yoda.” Fin’s laugh was cut off by a gasp as a strong hand slapped his ass. “Oooh, I like that. Do it again.”

“After dinner, I promise.” Jay grew serious as he hooked a finger into Fin’s belt loop and pulled him close. “They showed me some great sites and told me their own insights and experiences. I have a 20-week training plan printed out. Several of them swear by it. I think I may adapt it a bit to take up the entire six months between now and then, but this is an excellent place to start.”

“So I can start at barely being able to run three miles to being able to run 26.2 miles in six months?”

“Theoretically, yes. We’ll have to be cautious of increasing the distances too quickly since you haven’t built up a strong base of endurance yet, and we’ll have to be diligent about rest days.”

“My favorite days.”

Jay ignored his wink. “I do not want to risk an injury, I don’t care how badly you want to do this. But it’s definitely possible.”

“You’re going to run it with me, right?”

“Absolutely. I’ll be right there with you every step of the way. We’ll run together, walk together when we have to, and we’ll cross the finish line together.”

All Fin could see in his eyes was love.
He promised he would never let me fail or quit. I believe him.
“Thanks for going along with this, babe. Thanks for just doing what I needed you to do and not thinking me a crazy bitch.”

“I have better sense than to think it out loud,” Jay countered with a grin.

“Asshole,” Fin muttered halfheartedly.

“Yours is mine. Later. All of this – ” he held up the stack of papers and dropped them on the counter “ – can wait until tomorrow too. For now, I’d like to have a nice dinner date with my boyfriend and then pound him into the mattress afterwards.”

“Or the couch,” Fin added, thinking that it was much closer than their bedroom.

“You said earlier that it was lumpy.”

“I’ve been wondering ever since what kind of action it’s seen that made it so lumpy. We should test my theory.”

“OH MY God, kill me now.”

Fin sprawled out in the grass beside the road they had mapped out as a part of their marathon-training route. It was the ninth week of their adapted training program, and they were supposed to run twelve miles. Fin was on the tenth mile, the most he had run so far, and his whole body hurt.
Even my blisters have blisters – well, not really, but it sure feels like it.
He glanced down at his special-ordered, made-to-fit running shoes and thanked the powers that be, yet again, for a boyfriend who loved him enough to take care of him and not even blink at spending insane amounts of money on shoes.
My feet would be a mess of blisters if I had to wear my raggedy sneakers to train. My posture would suck too, and I would probably end up hurting myself.

Then he winced, as much at his protesting muscles as at his next thought.
How many computers will I have to build or repair, how many networks will I have to set up, and how many little old ladies will I have to teach to use a computer before I’m able to pay off that credit card balance for Jay’s birthday like I planned? So. Fucking. Many.

It’s worth it.
He had begun to repeat it like a mantra about two weeks into training.
This is all worth it. It damn well better be.

“C’mon, Sunshine, get up. We have two miles left. Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!” Jay yelled in his trainer voice, clapping his hands to punctuate his words as he ran in place.

Bastard isn’t even winded. He’s perkier now than when we started.
Fin pushed himself up into a sitting position, grumbling under his breath. When he saw Jay high-stepping in place with a wide grin, he flipped him the bird and flopped back down on the grass. “You go ahead. I’ll be right here when you come back.”
Fucking Energizer bunny.

Jay frowned when not even his nickname for Fin cheered him up. He’d started calling him Sunshine because the flecks in his honey-colored eyes glowed like rays of sunlight whenever he was happy or excited. Even his dirty blond hair had lightened as they spent so much time training in the summer sun. It seemed a cloud had settled over Fin now, blocking his sunlight from shining bright.

“We have to finish this run, Fin. The half-marathon is next weekend.”

“I know that.”

“Then get on your feet and let’s move. Ten miles down, two miles to go.”

“I can’t.”

“You …can’t?” Jay dropped to his knees in the grass and rubbed the aching muscles in his legs. “You were so gung-ho about it this morning. What’s changed, babe?”

Fin thought back to his eagerness earlier in the day, and a mirthless chuckle bubbled up out of him. “That was before I realized what running twelve miles feels like. It’s too hard. I can’t do it. And if I can’t run a half-marathon, I’m pretty sure a whole marathon is out of the question. Unless I’m gonna rollerblade or skateboard my way through it or something.”

“Oh, I see. It’s getting hard so now you want to quit.”

“
Too
hard, Jay. Don’t forget the descriptor. It’s an important one.”

“That makes it okay to quit trying to achieve your goal? That it’s
too
hard?”

“Yes,” Fin said firmly. “Some people are made to run marathons. I’m not one of them. I’ll be on the sidelines to cheer you on, though. I’m sure you’ll end up with a great time if you run with the other trainers from the gym.”

“I don’t want to run with the other trainers. I want to run with you.”

“Sorry, but it’s not happening.”

“You realize that this discomfort is temporary, don’t you? Don’t make a decision with long-term impact because you’re in short-term discomfort now.”

“This ‘discomfort,’ as you call it, is only going to get worse.”

“Are you hurt, Fin? Why didn’t you tell me?”

He reached up to still Jay’s hands running up and down his legs, searching for injuries. “No, I’m not hurt. I was referring to the suckage that is training for this insanity.”