Kill It With Magic: An Urban Fantasy Novel (The Lillim Callina Chronicles Book 1) (18 page)

“But I won’t,” he responded after a moment and patted Logan’s leg. “I assure you, it took a lot of work to get into this body.” He grinned at me, and his tongue snaked out over his lips. “I picked this one just for you. I wanted one you would remember.”

I tried to swallow, but my mouth had gone dry. I bit my lip to keep it from trembling. “One question.”

“I hope it isn’t, why didn’t I nail you to the wall as well.”

“No. Who exactly did Logan summon when he crafted that sword?” I pointed at the Demonslayer which now possessed all the life of a dead branch. He tossed it to the side, and it clattered lifelessly to the ground. Somehow, someway, the demon had somehow managed to rip itself out of the sword.

This was a demon, one who knew enough about me to spook me by using Caleb’s body. Somehow it was fully composed in the physical world and instead of inhabiting an avatar of flame as it had in its last iteration. It occupied an actual flesh and blood form. It was now a veritable powerhouse of corporeal life, and I had no idea how it’d managed to do that.

“Surely you recognize me.” He oozed up to me and caressed my cheek. “Even in this lovely form.”

“Can’t say that I do.” I reached into my overcoat but found that I had no weapon within immediate reach. Where had my gun gone?

Chapter 25

“Perfect,” Caleb purred as his hand slipped around me and pulled my body close to his. The moment he touched my skin, his lust and rage swept over me like a crashing wave. It crawled over my skin and down my throat, threatening to suffocate me. My own revulsion and terror filled me and it was like drowning in emotion— both mine and his.

He brought his lips to mine as I struggled to push him away, unable to break free of his grip. His tongue wormed its way into my mouth, and I started to gag. Tears began to stream from my eyes as my hands searched frantically for anything that could hurt him. My hand closed around the Beretta taped to the side of the desk. He reached out and tore my shirt from my body like it was tissue paper and pushed me backward against the desk. I put the weapon to his chest and fired.

Blood and thicker things splattered across my face and chest, hot and slick against my flesh. His skin began to sizzle as white-hot light exploded from the wound, filling the air with the smell of burning flesh. He looked down at the wound, regarding it curiously, a thin smile on his face. I fired again and again.

Click.

I squeezed the trigger again.

Click.

It was empty.

He looked at me for a long while before extending his hand casually outward. The bullets freed themselves from his flesh and fell soundlessly to the carpet, the metal still so hot that they smoked. Crap.

I threw out my right hand, catching him on the side of the chin with the pistol. The metal smoked and flared like a miniature star in my hand. I shrieked, dropping the red-hot weapon to the floor. My hand was on fire, and the stink of burned meat filled the air.

Caleb grabbed me by the hair and slammed the back of my head into the desk. Part of it splintered beneath the force of the blow. Stars shot across my eyes as everything around the edges went sort of dark and vague. I almost didn’t feel my body flop lifelessly on top of the desk.

A haze filled my vision as he climbed on top of me and leaned down so close that his breath was hot on my skin. He drew his tongue across my neck, leaving a slimy trail across my flesh. I tried to move away, but found I was unable to do much more than squirm as he placed his forearm against my throat and held me there. His skin was so hot that it was like having a frying pan pressed against my skin. Tremors shook me so violently that I was sure he could feel it.

He raised his face until we were eye to eye before driving his finger into my upper thigh, tearing open my skin. I screamed as white-hot pain shot through me. He lowered his mouth to my flesh and slurped at the wound, nibbling around the edges before jamming his tongue deep inside. I screamed.

He moved his bloody hand roughly across my chest, stopping to cup things he shouldn’t before wrapping his hand around my throat. He looked up at me, my blood dripping down his chin, and smiled.

“Surely you must remember me,” he cooed. “But, even if you don’t, I’ll make sure you remember me forever!”

Bang!

The sound exploded in my ears, deafening me. The demon pitched to the side, pulling me onto the floor with it. A guy who couldn’t have been more than seventeen years old, clad in faded blue jeans, a thin white tank top, and a cowboy hat leveled the barrel of his shotgun at the demon.

Crack!

The shell slammed into the demon in a flash of scarlet. The creature who looked like Caleb shrieked, its flesh melting as the slug tore a football sized hole through its torso. The gun went empty, and the demon rose to its full height. Blood oozed from its chest. Its skin had turned mottled and green. It howled, and its jaw distended as it dove forward, but the cowboy moved effortlessly to the side and smacked the thing in the back of its head with the butt of his shotgun.

The creature stumbled forward, and the cowboy pulled out a canteen and flung the contents at the demon. It howled as its flesh bubbled, the right side of its face erupting into silver flame. The demon screeched, throwing itself through the window, and dashing out into the alley.

The cowboy did not give chase. Instead, he picked up his shotgun and reloaded it. The shotgun disappeared into a leather holster slung on his hips, and he tipped his hat toward me.

“Good thing I was here to help,” he said with a smile that conveyed no warmth. “He was no match for my click boom style.”

“I didn’t need your help,” is what I wanted to say, but inexplicably, I opted for passing out instead.

Chapter 26

When I opened my eyes, the cowboy was holding me in his lap, his eyes fastened on the door. Salt covered every entrance to my apartment. He had been thorough. He must have taken care of the vampires as well because I didn’t see them anymore. I suppose he had probably done other things, too, but I didn’t know what those things might be.

His left hand was propped up against his knee with his shotgun pointed at the doorway. His other hand stroked my face with a gentleness that contrasted sharply with the cold ruthlessness he’d used on the demon.

“It’s been a while,” he said though he never looked at me.

My skin flushed. I struggled to come up with words as I shut my eyes and rolled off of him and onto the floor. Pain rushed through my leg, and I bit my lip to keep from screaming. My heart was pounding, thumping so hard in my chest that I was sure he could hear it. A ragged breath escaped me, and I shut my eyes tightly, trying to keep my tears from spilling out.

He was looking at me. His face was as impassive as it had been when he had confronted the demon. “I’ve been looking for you for a long time,” he said.

“Was I really that hard to find, Joshua? Are you really trying to tell me that
you
couldn’t find me?” I glared at him. “And why the hell are you here, anyway? Why did you contact me for help? Why now?” I screamed, throwing my aching body into motion as my uninjured fist connected sharply with his jaw. He sank into the couch with the blow, and I hit him again and again as tears began to stream down my face.

“Get the hell out of my house!” I screamed as my blows rained down on him. He didn’t block any of them. “Just go! Get away from me!”

Joshua grabbed my fists and pulled me close. A thin wisp of smoke puffed from the corner of his mouth. Good, that meant I’d hurt him. “Everything you’ve had to endure,” he said as he pulled my head into his chest, “you didn’t have to endure alone.”

“Yes I did!” I said though his chest muffled most of my words.

“No, you didn’t.” He smiled and kissed my forehead. The warmth of his lips lingered on my skin even after he had pulled back, and my heart skipped a beat. Why was he being so sweet? He was making it very hard to stay mad at him. How dare he save me? The bastard.

“I’m not her. I’m not Dirge,” I snapped, and before I knew what was going on, I’d slapped him across the mouth. I gulped once as his cheek reddened. I clasped my face in my hands and turned away from him. “I’m not her…”

“You stopped dyeing your hair,” he said softly but what I heard was, “You look just like her.” It was what I always heard when he spoke. It was even worse when he looked at me, when he ran his hands through my lavender hair. I knew, I just knew, deep down, that it wasn’t me he was really after. If he could, I just knew he would trade away my entire existence, my love, for one single moment with Dirge. I knew it, and I hated him for it.

Tears started to fill my eyes, and I covered my face with my hands. I didn’t want him to see me cry. Not here, not now. He placed a hand on my shoulder. The warmth of his touch was like fire on my skin. I took another step away, trying to throw off his touch.

“You get the swizzle I sent you?” Joshua’s voice was softer now. It almost had emotion in it.

“It was scary.”

I tried to take another step but the feeling of his hands on my shoulders stopped me. My body was falling into a familiar routine that I had never actually engaged in… but she had. The loathsome other life of Dirge had done this. In that moment he spun me around until we were face to face. I trembled as he touched me, his breath hot on my skin.

He trailed one hand down my cheek, and the warmth of his touch lingered on my skin. I closed my eyes for a moment. I started to relax as he brushed the hair out of my eyes.

“You didn’t come when I sent the swizzle,” he murmured.

“I couldn’t come,” I replied. “I tried…”

“I needed you.”

I shook myself out of his grip and took a step away from him. “You didn’t need me. You never did. You were always so far away. Being with you was like trying to make myself into someone I wasn’t.”

He moved closer, almost but not quite holding me as I spoke. I looked up at him, my cheeks wet with tears, and my heart wrenched. I don’t know quite how it happened but the next thing I knew he was kissing me. He drew me close, my body fitting against his like a piece of a puzzle. I fell into him as his fingers dug into my back, pulling me into him.

I looked into his eyes, and just for a second, I felt like her. Then I felt dirty, as if I were stealing something. I pulled away from him, staring into his eyes as I did so. His grip on me loosened, and I stepped away. He stood there looking at me.

“I’m not her,
Joshua!
” I’d said it so many times and so many times he had ignored me.

“You aren’t supposed to be her.” He shook his head. “You’re the only one who thinks you’re supposed to be.”

“That isn’t as true as
you
want it to be!”

Chapter 27

My head snapped up, and my sleep-swollen eyes darted around the room. My hand reached for the hilt of my sword only to find myself buried in a nest of blankets and pillows. I leapt to my feet, throwing everything to the ground in a flurry. My thigh screamed in pain, still sore despite the combination of horse pills Joshua had given me.

“I brought you some cereal.” Joshua’s voice made me very nearly leap out of my skin. There was a bowl next to my nest, and I glanced at it. Next to it was a shiny red apple. That looked much more promising.

“It’s good, it’s chocolate. I think that’s why the milk changed colors, but it is quite safe. Don’t worry.” Joshua sat idly at my desk with his feet propped up on its surface. He was carving something indistinguishable from a piece of wood. The little knife in his right hand flicked outward in rapid succession, flinging thin curls from the branch in his hand. I never knew Joshua liked to carve, and as far as I could tell, wasn’t much good at it.

“You left me last night,” I said solemnly, reaching out to take the bowl. I touched the brownish cereal with my finger; the milk appeared brown as well. “You said you wouldn’t leave. But I woke up and you were gone.”

“I didn’t leave you. I just went to find blankets.” He gestured at the couch where he’d slept. “Besides, you needed your rest.”

I nodded and sipped from the bowl, completely ignoring the spoon on the tray. I put the cereal back down and picked up the apple. I took a bite and chewed slowly, not wanting to think about anything but the taste. It was perfectly crisp, and for a moment, I could almost forget he was there. I wanted to forget that, in the end, I had let him stay.

This wasn’t what I’d planned. He was another reason I had run away. If I stayed with the Dioscuri I would be with Joshua. No matter how much it hurt me, I would be with him. Because when he touched me, no matter how much I knew it wasn’t really me he wanted, I could pretend. Sometimes pretending was easier than being without him. Sometimes pretending hurt just a little less.

Caleb hadn’t made me feel this way; everything with him had been so simple, so pure. Everything with Caleb had been easy, had been without baggage. Still, I wasn’t quite sure how I really felt about Caleb, especially with Joshua sitting there, so close that I could reach out and touch him.

I bit my lip and tried not to cry as my insides squirmed. I looked at my apple and resisted the urge to hurl it at Joshua.

“How did you find me yesterday?” I said as I swallowed the bite of apple. It was tough since my mouth was suddenly dry. “Or have you been following me for a while?”

“I didn’t find you. You made that impossible.” Joshua didn’t look up from his carving but shrugged his shoulders. “Mattoc sent me.”

My eyes opened wide and I stared at him for a long moment. “How?”

“Telepathy or something… I dunno.” He shrugged again. “I had a startlingly painful vision of what was happening, and I came as quick as I could.”

I closed my eyes in irritation. Admittedly, it was partly that Mattoc had sent him here and partly because he had saved me. “So where is Mattoc?”

“Isn’t he here?” Joshua looked at me and I stood, leaning on the table.

“No, Warthor took him.”

“Ah,” he said after a long pause. “Well, either way, we need to chase down the demon that escaped from the vampire’s Demonslayer. Mattoc will have to wait.”