Killing Me Softly (3 page)

Lexi shook herself out of the doldrums. Plastering a smile on her face, she tried to sound more cheerful. ‘You know,
Rolling Stone
magazine wrote an article about me. It came out today. You would have laughed. They got so much wrong. But they also wrote something that made me feel proud of what I’ve done. They said my work was inspired, that I seemed to have the ability to be able to work with all styles of music, using and mixing them into a unique blend. Or something like that.’ She laughed, feeling self-conscious, then wondered why. Cat wasn’t going to tell her she had a big head because she was crowing over her success. Besides, she had a right to crow, didn’t she?

‘Anyway, it’s lucky so many people agree. If they didn’t, I wouldn’t have been able to buy StormHaven Manor.’ She smiled.

‘It’s still a working farm and we’ve got cattle and sheep and horses and everything. You’re going to love it there. It’s so beautiful. Not in a rolling hills and pastureland kind of way – the land’s too wild for that. Untamed. The guys from Deliverance were blown away when they came down to mix the last album. I’ve built a brand-new studio and refitted the Dower House for the bands to stay in. You don’t have to worry about there being many people around though; I’ve got nothing on the books for a little while. There’s just us, Billy, Bev and Karl, and the farmhands. You remember I told you about Bev and Karl? Karl’s an ex-soldier but he says the farm is where he truly belongs. He manages the farm for us. Bev was once a nurse – in another life, she says – but she now runs the house and is going to help Billy with your therapy.’ Warmth filled her as she spoke of them.

‘You’ll love them. They live in the old carriage house that’s been converted into a cottage. Bev’s planted all our favourite roses along the stone fence; so pretty. And wait until you see the main house.’

She swallowed. Her mouth was dry. She saw the sign for a Wendy’s up ahead. Cat had always loved going to Wendy’s when they were little. She could get something to drink there.

‘Billy can’t wait to see you.’ She pulled into the parking lot and glanced over at Cat again, hoping to see some sign her sister registered what she was saying. But there was still nothing.

‘I’m so sorry about what happened, Cat. If I could have changed places that night, I would have. I understand if you’re angry and blame me. But please don’t blame Billy. He still loves you. He has such hope you’ll come back to us. Please try. For him. That’s all I’m asking.’

As Lexi drove up the long driveway to the main house, she saw Billy and Bev standing at the front door, the broad smiles on their faces welcoming her home.

Billy waved wildly and leaped down the steps, his boots skidding on the gravel of the drive as she pulled up before the house.

The Range Rover had barely stopped when he yanked open the passenger door. ‘Home sweet home,’ he sang into the car, his handsome face and grey eyes alive with a smile. Cat turned and looked at him, a frown furrowing her brow.

‘Cat? Cat, do you know who I am? I’m Billy.’

She stared at him for a long moment, her lips working and then the frown fell away and she moved her gaze to stare blindly over his shoulder.

Lexi reached across Cat and gripped his hand, excitement and hope a tight fist in her chest. ‘She recognised you.’

‘I know,’ Billy breathed. The way he drank in the sight of Cat made Lexi’s heart lurch. Had she done the right thing by asking him to do this with her? Yet she knew it would have hurt him if she’d asked anyone else.

She couldn’t bear hurting him any more than he’d already been hurt.

Without looking at her, he asked, ‘Did she acknowledge you?’

She shook her head, ignoring the pain. ‘But she did tap in time to the music on the radio the whole way home.’

She cursed the break in her voice as Billy’s gaze snapped to her. But before he could ask what was wrong, Bev stepped up behind him, saving Lexi from questions she didn’t want to answer right now.

‘Welcome home, Alexia love. I bet you feel like a hot cup of tea and something to eat. I’ve just pulled some scones out of the oven. William told me they’re Catriona’s favourite.’

Alexia smiled at the way Bev always called Billy ‘William’. She said a man needed a man’s name and she would call him by his. Alexia knew she was right, but to her Billy would always be Billy.

Bev bustled forward and took Cat’s arm as Billy helped her from the car. ‘How wonderful to finally meet you, Catriona. My name is Beverley Smart. Everyone calls me Bev. You’ll meet my husband Karl later at dinner. Come inside. I’ll show you to your room and then you can come to the kitchen and have some afternoon tea. I’m sure you’re famished.’ Bev looked up at Lexi and smiled.

Lexi swallowed back tears and met the smile, grateful Bev treated Cat as if there was nothing wrong with her. She watched as Bev steered Cat into the house. Some of the tension that had built in her over the long drive from London slipped away. Everything would be fine.

Taking in a breath, pushing the tears down deep, she slipped out of the car and looked around, relief hitting her in a wave.

‘Home sweet home,’ she whispered, echoing Billy’s words.

Her breath clouded in the cold air. Spring was around the corner, but winter still hadn’t completely given up its grip. Storm clouds, grey and billowing, covered the horizon and snow dotted the peaks of the hills in the distance. Another storm was coming. She looked forward to it.

She took in a deep breath, the scent of damp earth and rain-washed grass tantalising her senses. In the late afternoon sun the farm looked like a dream. Wild and rocky pastures were dotted with cows and black-faced sheep munching at the tufty green grass; birds circled in the sky; a horse neighed; the bark of Karl’s sheepdog as he rounded up some wayward sheep in a distant pasture echoed back to her. The copse that bordered the fields looked dark and secretive, making her long to explore. Everything greeted her, calling to her as no place had before.

She turned, her eyes running over the three-storey house, the windows shining beacons against the old blue-grey square-cut stone, welcoming her back. She always imagined the old lord of the manor standing there, surveying all he owned – Mr Rochester or Heathcliff, someone dark and brooding to go with the house and its surrounds – before he walked through his home and out into the old walled garden at the right of the house.

That garden had whispered to Lexi of history and family and hope when she’d first visited here, and it whispered to her now.

Home. She was home.

Breathing in the clean air, she gloried in her surrounds and then turned back to Billy. ‘It’s so good to finally be here.’

‘I know. You deserve to enjoy it.’

Lexi noticed the tension in his shoulders. ‘What’s wrong?’

‘Nothing,’ he said, linking his arm through hers and guiding her to the front door.

‘Billy?’

He stopped and crossed his arms over his chest. ‘You first.’

She shook her head. ‘Nuh-uh. I’m just tired.’

He arrowed her a ‘don’t bullshit me’ look.

‘It’s nothing. It’s been a long drive and Cat is hardly good company.’ She wasn’t going to tell him how she’d cried after taking Cat into Wendy’s. She thought she’d been prepared for the reality of moving her sister around in public. But it had been difficult. People stared. Then there was the trip to the toilet. Trying to negotiate two adults in a narrow toilet cubicle was anything but fun and Cat had ended up wetting herself. The bitterness of failure was still wedged in her throat.

Billy must have read the look on her face because he put his hand on her shoulder, squeezed. ‘I should have gone with you.’

‘No. You had things to do. I’m fine. Just a bit worn out.’ Her foot touched the first step before she remembered what had started the conversation. ‘Hang on a moment, you sneaky bugger. We were supposed to be talking about what’s got your knickers in a knot.’ She rounded on him, poking him in the chest. ‘Spill.’

‘Ow! That hurt. Christ, Lexi, you’ve got fingers of steel.’ Billy rubbed his chest.

‘It’ll hurt even more if you don’t tell me what’s up.’ She stood on the step above him, enabling her to glare at him eye to eye, finger poised to poke him again.

Billy backed away towards the car. ‘Okay. But let’s wait until after you’ve had some tea. You go in and I’ll put the car in the garage.’

She narrowed her eyes. ‘I won’t forget about it.’

He laughed. ‘I know, I know. You’ve got a memory like an elephant. Now go, before I have to carry you in.’

‘You’re not convincing as a pushy male, Billy. I know you too well, you big softy.’

Billy snorted and hopped into the Rover, leaning out the window as the engine sprang to life. ‘Go inside and warm up. And tell Cat not to eat my share of the scones.’ He took off with a scatter of dust and pebbles before she could respond.

Lexi smiled after him as he spun the tyres in the gravel drive. Typical man! But she loved him dearly.

The perfume from the flowers hit her as soon as she entered the foyer. Bouquets of roses and wildflowers were on every surface and garlands hung on the walls and wound around the banisters of the double staircase. A banner strung over the staircase welcomed them home. Her eyes prickled and she blinked back the happy tears.

As she walked up the stairs and turned left to go down the hall to her bedroom – once the master suite – she found more flowers. She stopped to smell them, touching the soft petals and drinking in the visual and sensual luxury. Bev and Billy must have worked for hours to create this surprise. She peered into her room. Flowers adorned every surface: on the table beside the window seat, on her bedside table and dresser and a huge bower spilling over the antique trunk at the base of her bed. The love in the gesture washed over her and feeling suddenly free, she spun around until she was dizzy, and fell on the bed, laughing.

‘I’m glad you like them.’

Lexi jumped, hand to her chest. ‘God, I didn’t hear you.’

Bev stood in the doorway with Cat beside her. ‘Sorry for startling you, love. I was just taking Catriona back down to the kitchen for afternoon tea and I heard you in here.’ She looked around the room. ‘Beautiful, aren’t they? Billy worked all morning to decorate the house for you both.’

‘I can’t believe he did that. It’s one of the most wonderful things anybody’s ever done for me.’ Lexi bent over a vase of roses, breathing in the sweet perfume. ‘I think you had a hand in it, though. Thank you.’

Bev waved her hand. ‘Billy came up with the idea and picked them. I just helped with the arranging. The early spring roses are my favourites, but most of them came from the greenhouse.’ She turned back to Cat who stood looking blindly at the far window. The curtains fluttered in the gentle breeze. ‘Come on then. Let’s go have a nice cup of tea.’

Bev handled Cat with the warm efficiency gained through her years of nursing, and as Lexi followed her downstairs, she once again marvelled at her luck in finding the Smarts and employing them to work on the estate. They’d helped to bring it to life once again.

After settling Cat at the old wooden kitchen table, Bev put the kettle on and started to place scones on a plate with a bowl of jam and a jug of clotted cream.

‘Before I forget, Karl collected the mail earlier. It’s in the study. The envelope was bulging. He said he’s glad he’s not you.’

Lexi laughed. ‘Sometimes I wish I wasn’t me either.’

‘Why don’t you have your manager handle your mail?’

Lexi shrugged. ‘I send her the stuff I don’t want to deal with and I take care of everything else.’ She screwed up her face. ‘I think there’s a large part of me that’s a control freak. I can’t seem to act “Lord of the Manor” and have everyone else do everything for me.’

Bev chuckled. ‘Well, love, I think you might be very wise. Only you can know what’s truly important to you. Now eat up before the others come in and demolish those scones before you can blink.’

Lexi laughed and bit into a scone layered with jam and cream. ‘Mm, wonderful,’ she managed, just as the back door opened and Billy walked in.

‘Scones! My favourite.’ He made a grab for the plate but Lexi whipped it out of reach, laughing.

‘No you don’t. These are mine.’ He lunged for them but she moved the plate further out of his reach then gasped as the plate was taken out of her hand.

All of them stopped, the laughter forgotten as they stared at Cat. She lowered the plate to the table, took a scone and bit into it.

‘Cat?’ Lexi breathed. ‘Cat, can you hear me?’ Her sister stared blankly ahead, chewing steadily.

Bev, hand to her chest, sighed, ‘Oh, my. I guess she likes my scones.’

Lexi choked on a laugh and looked over at Billy. He was gazing at Cat with a longing that pierced Lexi to the core. She took his hand, squeezed. ‘That’s the third time today she’s reacted to something. It has to be a good sign.’

He let go of her hand and she could see he was trying to be the professional physical therapist, not an excited friend. ‘It is. But you know what the research says. We can’t push. She has to come to us.’

Lexi nodded, frustrated, but knew he was right.

Bev let out a fast breath. ‘Let’s just be as normal as possible then, shall we? How about some more tea?’

‘I’d love some,’ Karl said as he walked in the door.

‘Not until you’ve taken those boots off you won’t,’ Bev scolded.

‘Right you are, my love,’ he smiled as he walked back outside.

Lexi couldn’t help but watch him as he came back in, removed his hat, rubbed his hand on his overalls and stepped over to Cat.

‘This is Catriona then? he asked in his gentle northern accent. Taking her hand, he patted the back of it. ‘I’m pleased to meet you, young miss.’ He gestured to the scone in her hand. ‘I see you’re enjoying my Bev’s scones. They’re the best scones in the county and don’t you let anyone tell you otherwise. In fact, they’re so good I might have to have me one even though it might spoil m’dinner.’ He sat down, took a scone, daubing half with a big wedge of butter, and took a swig of the tea Bev placed in front of him.

Lexi stood, touched his shoulder, lips trembling in a grateful smile. He simply nodded. She took a deep breath. ‘I think I’ll just go and see to the mail.’ She looked meaningfully at Billy. ‘I’ll be in the study, so when you’ve settled Cat, come and tell me what’s bugging you.’