Kissing Steel (20 page)

I am sad.” There was no point in denying it, she figured. “I’m trying to not cry because

I’m human and hell, we do a lot of that. We—
I
—suck at hiding my emotions, I guess.”

He took a deep breath. “I would take you to Garden but you wouldn’t be happy

there, Rena. I have considered this, as I told you. I know you would want equality and I

will never be able to give you that.”

“Because I’m property and that isn’t going to change on your world?”

He gave a sharp nod. “You would grow to hate me in time and I don’t want to break

your spirit. It would be only a short time before I need to form a family unit and it would

be more difficult on each of us to separate if we spent more time together.”

“Right.”

“I am honor bound, my little siren. I can’t change what I am even if I wanted to. We

come from different worlds now and neither of them is receptive to the other.”

“I get it. I hate it, but I do understand.”

“It is very unfortunate.”

“Damn straight.” She paused. “By the way, watch your ass with Fusion, okay? She’s

determined to have you and she said she could make you sleep with her.” She paused.

“What is a breeding pact?”

Steel’s entire body went rigid under hers and anger radiated from his eyes. “She told

you that term?”

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“She said to ask you about it and then said she’d get you, even if she had to contract

with someone in your breeding pact who had bad sperm.”

He lay staring at the ceiling then looked at her, his expression masked. “You know

it’s our duty to produce children and I told you that some of our males do not have viable

sperm to impregnate a female. Twelve males sign a pact, a contract. If the males in a

family unit cannot impregnate their female, they can call upon another pact member to do

so. We do not consider them our children, we are just donors, only able to claim the

children we produce with the women in our family unit as our offspring.”

She tried to hide her dismay. “You’ve impregnated women in other family units

then?”

His jaw clenched and his eyes narrowed. “I realize, to humans, this sounds cold, but I

do feel conflicted over this subject. It is for the good of all, though, so I deal with the

unwanted negative emotions.”

“I’m not judging. I was asking a question.”

He sucked in air, slowly exhaling, never looking away from her curious gaze. “I am

a healthy breeder and have been contacted nine times to donate.”

“Twelve men and they needed you that many times?”

“Yes. Producing as many children as possible is greatly encouraged.”

“So you had to sleep with nine women? That’s a lot of males out of that dozen who

can’t produce babies. Is that common?”

“There were just five females in all that I needed to service, some multiple times.”

He paused. “I was successful eight times out of those nine, donating my sperm. Natural

breeding has a higher successful rate if you think to ask me why we don’t use alternative

methods. We attempted it and the failure rate was unacceptably high.”

Her mind was reeling, trying to understand all the implications, accepting that he’d

just told her he’d helped create eight children. “Is that why you want to be in a family

unit? So you don’t have to knock up other women to make babies you can’t claim as your

own?” She hurt for him, not able to imagine the pain of having children she couldn’t

keep, now understanding why he was so determined to get married.

Steel frowned. “That doesn’t matter. If I am in a family unit or not, I am always

under the obligation of the pact.”

“So you slept with other women when you were married? And your wife slept with

other men she was contracted to in a family unit?”

Steel gripped her suddenly, lifting her off him to roll onto his side. He stared at her, a

frown firmly in place. “It’s not how we wish things were but it is about survival and what

we must do. That is another reason I won’t be taking you to Garden with me, Rena. I saw

your reaction to Fusion undressing in front of me and again on the planet surface when

Fiona offered to test our physical chemistry. I had the choice to deny them access to my

body but that isn’t the case with women in the family units of the men in my breeding

pact. It will be my duty if they need me to donate. Do you understand?”

She looked down at his broad chest. “It means you can never be faithful.” She closed

her eyes, inching closer to him to curl into his larger body, letting him soothe her pain as

he pulled her into his arms.

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“I can’t be faithful,” he said softly. “I’m a breeder who wants a woman I can’t have

children with.” He sighed loudly. “Ironic, isn’t it?”

A smile played at her lips. “Yeah. Life is a bitch sometimes.”

He nodded, his chin brushing the top of her head. “Our remaining time together is

slipping by too quickly.”

She lifted her head, meeting his gaze. “Let’s make the most of the time we have.”

She took his mouth, kissing Steel, and shutting out the pain of knowing they were

saying goodbye to each other. She wanted to make the most of it, memorize every

second, every touch, everything about the man she couldn’t have yet wanted to remain

with more than she wanted her next breath.

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The pod was a lot bigger than Rena would have guessed as she stared around it from

the pilot seat, her belt on and her heart broken. Saying goodbye to Steel had been one of

the hardest things she’d ever done. Tears filled her eyes but she blinked them back.
It’s

for the best. You know it
, she thought.
He needs to have little cyborg babies with one of

his big cyborg women.

“Fuck,” she whispered as she forced her attention to the controls. “Pod 3, respond.”

“Orders?”

Rena really hated autopilot systems, never sure exactly how to talk to them, but she

knew she had to give it a shot. Steel had assured her that the pod knew where it was

taking her, that there would be no errors on destination. She knew Steel was tracking her

long distance by a droid they had following her to relay information to the
Vontage
,

which
wasn’t in range of Outpost Five. No one would be able to detect the ship.

“State orders.”

Right.
“Distance to Outpost Five in time, please.”

There was hesitation on the computer’s response. “At current rate of speed, two

hours, fourteen minutes, thirty-two seconds.”

“Thank you.”

“Orders?”

I hate autopilot.
“That is all.”

“Pod 3 going silent.”

“Thank you!”

She turned in her seat, staring at the empty seats in the back of the pod, experiencing

an eerie feeling being alone in something designed for at least a few dozen people. In just

over two hours she was going to reach Outpost Five, get on the first transport to Earth

that became available, and then she’d be back on Earth before she knew it, back to the

hell she had left.

She suddenly yawned, surprising her, but she knew she shouldn’t be, not after

spending all night without sleep. Her heart ached at the image of Steel that filled her

mind—his gorgeous silver-blue eyes, and his full lips that made him incredibly handsome

when he smiled at her. She’d miss his voice, his laugh, and even his frowns. Depression

hit her hard and caused her to unfasten her seat belt and leave the pilot’s chair. She paced,

hoping to grow so tired she’d stop obsessively thinking about a man she was better off

forgetting as soon as possible.

She’d committed adultery. Rena snorted, not worried about it since her marriage was

a farce to begin with. Chuck cheated all the damn time and it wasn’t as if he’d ever know

since she could never admit to anyone that Steel even existed. He was her secret until the

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day she died, knowing it would always be too dangerous to ever trust telling a soul what

had really happened to the
Bridden
or what had happened when she’d reached the
Star
.

Mentally, she went over her story again and again, not wanting to screw anything up.

She paced, rehearsed what she’d say to Joe Emmit and to Chuck when they wanted to

know why the hell the company had lost money and she didn’t have a ship to show for it.

Another yawn and she turned to go sit down finally, ready to get off her feet.

“Proximity warning.” Pod 3 spoke suddenly, startling Rena enough that she jumped.

“To what?” She dropped into the pilot chair. Confused, she said, “Open the window

shields and let me see out there.” The pod’s range scanners wouldn’t have picked up the

outpost yet. Steel had told her that when one of his men reprogrammed the pod memory

he’d made its sensors blind to the
Star
, the
Vontage
, and their shuttles so it wouldn’t

record them. That meant it also wouldn’t be able to give warning if those were the ships

in range.

The window shields opened as the computer started to speak. “Vessel identified as

the
Gordon Lee
One-Two-Seven
, Earth Government, Class B. They are hailing.”

Rena stared out into space but didn’t see anything. When she peered down at the

scanner board she saw a blue beep on the upper right side of the screen. The ship was still

far off but it definitely was in range and closing.

“They are hailing us,” Pod 3 informed her again. “Orders?”

“What the hell is a government ship doing this far out?”

“Information not available,” the computer stated.

She had to fight to not roll her eyes. “I was speaking to myself.” She bit her lip and

then sighed. “Open communication.”

“This is General Vern Mellhorn of Earth Government,” a man’s deep voice filled the

speakers. “Adjust your course immediately to dock with the
Gordon Lee
or we will blow

you out of space.”

“Um…” She was stunned. “I’m Rena Gates, an insurance recovery agent with

Demco insurance.” She paused. “I’m not a pirate though I’m sure you’re reading the

designation of this pod and it’s been reported stolen. I was able to recover it from the ship

it belonged to.”

There was a long moment of silence. “Confirm your identity again. State your full

name and employee identification number.”

Taking a deep breath, Rena started talking, knowing that their computer would be

running her voice and verifying her identification with Demco. She waited as she figured

they attempted to contact Earth. This far out in space could take some time but she was

surprised when within two minutes the general’s voice came back.

“Your identity has been confirmed, Ms. Gates. Who else is on that pod with you?”

“I’m the sole survivor.” She took a deep breath, knowing now was the time to start

using that made-up story. “I’m a recovery agent for Demco and I went after the
Star
with

a hired recovery crew on a shuttle named
Bridden
. We located and boarded our target but

there were a lot more pirates aboard than we estimated.” She took another deep breath,

hoping that she sounded believable. “My crew was outnumbered, they fought hard, but

we were overtaken by the pirate crew. The last thing those men did was fight hard

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Kissing Steel – Laurann Dohner

enough to get me to one of the
Star
’s pods where I launched to safety. I watched both

ships explode as I jettisoned away to escape but my men never made it to another one of

the pods like they were supposed to. They gave their lives for me.”

“Did you personally see these pirates?”

“Of course I did. I just stated that I left the
Bridden
, boarded the
Star
with my crew,

and we were outnumbered when we were attacked.”

“You saw pirates yourself?” The general sounded angry, his voice tight.

“Yes,” she lied easily.

“Describe the pirates in detail now.”

What the hell was this guy’s problem? What kind of question was that anyway?

“They are ugly, deformed, smell bad, and are insane, judging by the way they fought.”

She’d seen the news and heard the stories enough to know that much about them. “They

killed my crew.”

“So that is going to be your official statement? You discovered pirates onboard the

Star
and they killed your crew?”

“Yes,” she said, not liking the sarcastic tone of the man speaking to her or that he

didn’t even try to hide it from her.

“Under Earth Government order you are under arrest, Ms. Gates. Have your pod

change course immediately to dock with us. If you try to run we will chase you down and

blow up your escape pod. Do you understand?”

She was beyond stunned. “What am I under arrest for?”