Knave of Broken Hearts (28 page)

“Observing.”

“Like hell.”

“Authorized by Nishimura.”

Carney narrowed his eyes. “My, you do stick together. Just stay out of my way.”

Eloqua flashed his dark eyes at Carney. “Don’t you mean my way, James?”

“Of course.”

Ken looked at Eloqua, a big, kind man who he generally liked. “You’re doing this minimally invasively?”

“Of course.”

Carney sneered. “We need to get him back to his highly productive life as soon as possible, right?”

Ken looked at Eloqua but let his eyes shift to Carney. “And you’re going to repair the valve, not replace it?” He held his breath. A valve replacement for a man so young would compromise his freedom and his life, but repair could be tricky.

Carney’s eyes shifted.

“Repair it. You can do it.”

“It’s Dr. Eloqua’s surgery.”

Ken shifted his eyes to Eloqua. “Just save the valve. You can do it.”

Carney sneered, “You’re awfully interested for a doctor who should have told James how serious his heart problem was. You practically killed him.”

Ken’s sore hands clenched. What Carney said was too close to the truth.

Eloqua shook his head. “It’s almost impossible to tell the severity of a mitral valve prolapse without surgery.” He ducked his head a little since Carney was the senior surgeon. “As I know you’re aware.”

Ken stepped forward. “Also no disrespect, but Jim’s had this problem since birth. You had sixteen years to diagnose it.” Carney stared back, but his eyes shifted an inch. Ken nodded at Eloqua. “Just repair it, if it’s possible.”

Eloqua looked worried. Even Carney would have trouble with a tricky valve repair. Was Eloqua up to it? He gave a sharp nod. “I have a valve standing by, if needed.”

He walked into the operating room. Ken followed and stopped. Jim lay silent and still, covered with a cloth, his face masked and an endotracheal tube protruding from his mouth. The hisses and beeps of the OR filled the icy cold room.
Want to climb on the table with him. Hold him forever.
But Jim wasn’t his to hold. Instead he positioned himself at the back where he could see clearly but not get in the way.

The surgery began. Ken stared at the spot where Eloqua’s scalpel incised the skin between Jim’s ribs. He didn’t want to watch but had to see. Had to be sure there was no slip. One slip of a surgeon’s hand had altered his life by killing his brother. Another one would kill him. Red blood covered Eloqua’s fingers as the skin and ribs were separated. Jim’s life ebbing out. The hiss of the ventilator hypnotized as Eloqua’s hands moved surely—impersonally. Had the hands of the surgeon who failed his brother been like that? There hadn’t been anyone to speak for Ryoichi. He’d died because of someone who was supposed to care for him.

Eloqua paused and looked at Carney. The nurse reached for a jar of solution with the porcine valve floating.
No.
With a tissue valve, Jim would require surgery several more times in his life. A longer-life mechanical valve meant he’d have to take blood thinners. Repair would give Jim a largely normal life. “Repair it!”

Carney looked over, frowning. Eloqua said, “It’s bad, Tanaka. Replacement is indicated.”

“Repair it. Damn it, he’s twenty-six.”

“It’s what’s best for the patient.”

Ken stepped toward Carney. “Please. He’s your son.” His voice shook, but he couldn’t control it.

It was like the operating room staff took a breath. Obviously most didn’t know that Carney had scrubbed in on a surgery on his son. The anesthesiologist looked up and frown lines appeared over his mask.

Ken’s hands balled into fists so tight his nails cut into the gloves. He wanted to scream and grab the scalpel. Why hadn’t he become a surgeon?
Save him. Save Jim.

Carney looked toward Ken. “It’s entirely Dr. Eloqua’s decision. I have no say in this.”

Eloqua visibly took a breath, nodded, and extended a hand. The OR nurse slapped vascular scissors into his grip, then turned and closed the container holding the heart valve. Ken’s knees dissolved to fluid, and he stepped back so the wall could hold him up.

For two hours he stared, watched every move, kept Jim alive with the force of his will. Finally it was over and he staggered into the scrub room and collapsed on a bench. Carney and Eloqua walked in and Ken stood. “I know that was incredibly difficult. Thank you.”

Eloqua nodded, then smiled.

For a second that sneer of Carney’s popped into place; then it melted. “He’ll be better off without the valve—at least for now.”

“Yes.”

“But he may need it downstream.”

“I understand that.”

He stared at Ken for several beats and then nodded, turned his back, and focused on cleaning up. Ken ripped off the scrubs and hurried into the hall. He had to be there for recovery.

J
IM
SUCKED
in a breath. Damn, his throat hurt like fire.
Wait, where am I?
He opened an eye. Dim light filtered in, but it still hurt. Shut. He moved his head slightly.
Whoa. Weird.
Man, he felt like he’d had six shots of Jack. Woozy and strange. His body lay like a lump while he floated around somewhere.

Focus.

Vaguely, he felt pressure against his hip.

Slowly he blinked open his eyes.
Hospital.
Beep. Beep.
He looked down without moving his head. Constance sat in a chair beside him with her head resting on his bed pressed against his hip, sound asleep.
Where did she come from? Why?

Noise. Creaking. Staring past his nose, he looked to the other side of the bed.
Holy shit.
Ken sprawled in a chair, likewise asleep. How did he get here?
Hell, how did I get here?

Room spinning. He closed his eyes. His brain conjured an image of him lying on the floor begging Constance to call Ken.

He heard movement.
Open my eyes or close?
He opened them.

Ken was beside him in a flash. “Jim. You’re awake. Hi, guy. How are you feeling?”

Jim smiled. “Am I dreaming?”

Ken grinned. “I don’t know. Are you?”

“Must be. Seeing visions.”

Their eyes swam together. Jim drew a breath. “I—

“Jim, oh God. How do you feel?” Constance leaned over him and pressed a hand to his head.

He blinked. “Oh, not too bad. I can hardly feel anything. They must have me pumped full of drugs. I’m not even sure what happened.”

“You collapsed at the fundraiser and were brought here in an ambulance.”

She looked at Ken, who nodded. “They repaired your mitral valve.”

Jim laughed, and it came out as a giggle.
Drugged for sure.
“The floppy one?”

“That’s the one.” Ken smiled, but looked down at his hands.

Constance nodded. “Ken was in the operating room with you for the whole surgery.”

Wait, what?
“What do you mean?”

“He attended the entire operation. To be sure everything was handled correctly.”

Ken frowned a little. “It wasn’t necessary, really. The surgeon did a great job. But you were my patient, so—” He shrugged.

Right. Patient.
Jim sighed.

Ken looked up at Constance, then toward the door. “I should be going and leave you two alone. I’ll let the nurse know you’re awake and responding well.”

Alone.
So Ken had come to check his vital signs. Jim closed his eyes. Maybe being awake wasn’t so great after all. He heard Ken moving toward the door as he fell back to sleep.

L
IGHTS
. B
EEPING
.
Right, hospital.
Jim opened his eyes.

“Hey, bro, you awake?”

Jim looked to the side. “Hi, Ian. Where am I, how am I, and what day is it?”

“You’re at OC General, the resident says you’re doing well, and it’s Saturday afternoon. Why the hell didn’t you tell me your heart was so bad?”

Jim shrugged. “I didn’t exactly know.”

“Oh really? Dr. Tanaka says you did.”

Jim sighed.

“Knock, knock.” Constance peered around the half-open door. “Can I come in?” She looked toward Ian. “Oh, sorry. I can come back later. I just brought you some sports magazines.” She walked in and dropped them on the table beside his bed, then smiled. “You must be Ian. I’m Constance Murch.”

Ian smiled back, but it looked tight. “Glad to meet you. Jim really likes working for you.”

She glanced at Jim, then back at Ian. “I like working with him, too.” She started toward the door.

Jim shook his head. “Don’t go. I’m having trouble connecting with what happened.”

She dragged a chair over beside Ian. “We were at the fundraiser. You were drinking a lot, which I’ve since learned you shouldn’t have been.” She frowned. “You were defending your employer to your father and suddenly fell to the floor grabbing your chest. I thought you’d had a heart attack. But fortunately I got a hold of Dr. Tanaka, who told me it was a mitral valve problem.”

“You got a hold of him?”

“Yes, I had his number since he’s my tenant.”

“Why did you call him?”

“You told me to.”

“Oh.”

Constance frowned, and Ian stared at his hands.

“Hey, buddy, can I come in?” Billy walked into the room, filling the small space with his big frame.

Jim smiled. “Hi, Billy. I see they’ll let just anybody in here.”

Billy leaned over and gave him a pretend punch on the arm.

Holy shit.
“I hope this doesn’t mess up the company insurance.”

“No. Tanaka says it won’t be covered since it’s a pre-existing thing, but your father’s not going to charge you.”

“My father?”

Constance nodded. “Yes, he was there for your surgery. He couldn’t do it himself. Not allowed. But I guess he supervised—along with Ken.”

Ken.
Jim took a breath.

Billy smiled. “And the company will pay the hospital, so no worries.’

“You don’t have to do that.”

Billy nodded. “Yeah, I do, since company principals need to be covered by the policy.”

Jim nodded before it sank in. “What?”

“I mean, as my partner, you need to have the company pay for your healthcare.”

“Partner? Billy, I don’t understand—”

Constance put a hand on his arm. “He means that he’s offering you a partnership in the company, Jim. Which I think is wise before somebody else snatches you up.”

Billy nodded. “Shaz and I planned the whole thing while we were gone, but then I was afraid you wanted a different kind of future. Maybe you don’t want to work for a gay contractor?”

Constance gave Billy her most direct stare. “My father believes that a gay contractor won’t make it in the industry. I’d like to see you and Jim prove him wrong.”

Billy returned her gaze. “I would too.”

“You’ve earned my business, and I plan to see you have a lot of it.”

Billy glanced at Jim. “What do you say?”

Oh God, how could the fucking universe give him so many of the wrong gifts? “I—I don’t think I can.”

Billy’s sweet face clouded. “Oh, okay. I understand.”

“No, wait, it’s just that—Constance, I really like working with you.”

Billy nodded. “Sure, Constance and her father can do so many more things for you. I don’t blame you at all.”

“No, I mean—”

Constance frowned. “Jim, I—”

“Are you supposed to have this many visitors?” Ken Tanaka walked in the door, and Jim’s improved heart valve skipped six beats.

Constance looked up. “Should we go?”

Ken smiled.
Suns and moons.
“No, just kidding. The nurses are going to get Jim on his feet, and he’ll be ready to go home tomorrow. I just wanted to check in.” His eyes connected with everyone but Jim. Finally he looked over, but he stared at Jim’s chest. “So how are you feeling?”

“Okay.”

He nodded. “Good, good.”

Phoniest thing he’d ever heard. Ken must be dying to get out of there.

Constance looked between Ken and Jim. “Billy just asked Jim to be his business partner.”

“Oh, yes, wonderful. He deserves it.” More phoniness. “So I’ll tell the nurses to hold off a little while on getting Jim up. Just don’t tire him too much with all the good news, okay? The resident will be releasing you. Good to see everyone.” He turned and started out the door. A dull gray cloud settled on Jim’s chest. So this was the future. Maybe he’d just drift off again.

“Just a damned moment.”

Jim’s eyes flew open to see Constance standing with her hands on her hips, staring toward Ken. “Where the hell do you think you’re going?”

Ken frowned. “To speak to the nurse.”

“And after that?”

“Home. I’ve been up since yesterday morning.”

“Before you go anywhere, we have to clear a few things up.” She circled, looking at all the men in the room, then pointed at Ken. “I think you have the impression that Jim is devoted to me and can’t live without me. Is that true?”

Ken shrugged. “Something like that.” He stared at the floor, which was not fascinating, as Jim could testify.

Constance let out an exasperated huff. “It’s a lie created by my father who, bless him, is a meddling fool who also happens to be damned insulting. Jim doesn’t love me.” She turned to Jim, a crease carved between her eyebrows. “Why did you do it? I thought we were friends.”

Jim struggled to sit up before Ian pressed the button on the bed to raise it. “I hope we are. It’s just that I never knew, uh, who I was, really, and I genuinely like you a lot.”

“But you’re gay, right?”

Ken’s head snapped up and Ian yelled, “Yes!” Then he blushed. “Sorry. He’s had a tough time admitting it.”

Constance skewered him with her stare. “So you’re admitting it now?”

Jim inhaled and nodded. “I didn’t mean to deceive you. I was figuring out my own shit and was just about ready to come clean when
my father—” He glanced at Ian. “
—
when my father got involved and—
” What the fuck could he say?