Lacey's Luhpynes [Beyond the Veil 1] (Siren Publishing Ménage and More) (11 page)

“Look.” Zhubin stepped in between them. “Let’s table this for now. Ansell, you have twenty minutes before dinner is ready. Go and have your shower. We will all sit, enjoy the meal and then discuss this further after we’ve all digested what’s already been said. All right?” He looked back and forth between them.

Lacey nodded and sighed. She watched Ansell walk away and felt her heart hurting. She looked to Zhubin and had tears in her eyes. “I love him, so very much I love him. I love you too. What happens now?” she asked.

“Now we will eat dinner, try and calm down and then we will talk some more. We may not solve this all tonight, Lacey, but we will solve it. He’s not opposed to being around children, your children. But he does have a point. A lie is a lie to our beasts. Whether it is small or full-born it still makes us hurt. For children, the rules of the beast can be bent but only for so long. Besides, children are anything but stupid. They see and understand far more than most adults ever could or would. Come, let’s get you something to drink while I rescue the roast from the oven.”

“Is it just me making more out of this than there should be? And do you even want to be the father of our children? If Ansell is that against it, what are your thoughts?” she asked softly. “What do you want to do? I know what Ansell wants, and I respect that, now it’s your turn.”

“I’m all for giving you as many babies as can be managed,” he said and shot her a grin that slid away too soon. He moved into the kitchen and went straight to the oven. “I love kids, always have. I was an only child until Ansell joined our household. Though not from lack of trying on parents’ end, from what I regrettably overheard during those years.” He paused with the oven door open and shuddered. “Some things no child, no matter their age, should ever have to overhear. But apparently my mother had a difficult time carrying me, and a hard labor. So the doctors insisted she never have a child again and then ensured she couldn’t. She slightly smothered both myself and Ansell. Which reminds me.” He turned after setting the large pan on the stove. “Watch out for her and her helpful advice. Gods only know what she may give you.”

“Gotcha. Watch out for the motherly advice,” Lacey said with a smile. “I want a very large family, not right away, but I really do. We have a killer to catch before we can think about having a child but I truly do want as many children as we can possibly have.”

“There you go. We will get him, Lacey. I haven’t heard anything back yet from my father but hopefully there will be news in the morning. Tonight, though, we’re not going to worry about that. We’re going to have a nice meal and spend the evening figuring out where we want our lives to go as a unit, a team.”

“And tonight I want to know what it feels like to have you both holding me. We don’t have to have sex, but I want to know what I’ve been denying myself for so very long. I really and truly love you both and I want to know what it will be to have you both sleeping with me. Think that Ansell will go for it?”

Nodding, he smiled slightly. “I know he seems like a stubborn asshole, believe me, he can be. But he can also be reasonable. Not always but if you get him on the right day when the planets are aligned.” He chuckled. “Can you set the table for me?” he asked, pointing to the dishes stacked on the counter.

“Sure, I can do that without issue at all,” she told him with a smile. She moved to start to set the table and watched him as she did so. “I’ve known you guys for several years, I like both of you a great deal, I really do. I just want to be able to do this without effing everything up and it looks like I’m failing time and again.”

“Hey, none of that,” he said, bringing over two bowls, one with baby potatoes and the other with little carrots and peas. “That sort of thought process is destructive and just plain silly. You aren’t failing, but you are having to deal with two extremely stubborn Luhpynes. So really, if there is any blame to be laid for this being harder than necessary, it falls on Ansell fully.”

“No, you can’t blame him.” Lacey found herself quickly taking up for the other Luhpyne. “I mean it. It’s no more his fault than yours. I’m just a stubborn brat and we both know it. I just guess that I’m scared to death about everything that is happening right now. Everything that’s going on. I won’t want to do something that will cause harm to anyone and I’m afraid that I’ve already done that to him. I’m a terrible person.”

“You’re not a terrible person, Lacey,” Ansell said from the doorway. When she turned to look his way he moved into the room slowly. Zhubin moved away as he got closer. “I’m a stubborn ass. Zhubin is right about that. I can’t help how I am but I might be able to explain it.” He held out a hand to her. “Will you come sit with me for a minute so I can try?”

“Of course.” Lacey moved to his side and then slipped her hand into his. Giving his hand a squeeze, she nodded. “All right. I will do whatever you want. I look forward to you telling me anything that you have to tell me. I just want to know if you think that I will fit into the world that you have with me.”

Leading her from the kitchen he took her to the living room. Kicking the wolves off the sofa, he sent them toward the kitchen. Then they sat. “My parents abandoned me as a child but what no one, not even Zhubin knows is, I remember them. Not clearly, not perfectly by any means, but I recall enough that if I wanted to I could find them, I suppose. I just don’t want to. Their betrayal hurt me deeply. That and the fact I know my father was a Rogue, a Luhpyne that isn’t all there mentally. I can’t be sure but I don’t think my mother was his mate, I think she belonged to another two males and he’d taken her for some reason.”

“Oh, honey.” Lacey moved in closer to Ansell and cupped his face in her hands. “You are better off without them then, if they left you. I won’t though. I’m here for good and you need to get used to that idea. I love you, Ansell, and to me that means something. That means that I’m never going anywhere. I’m here for now and for the rest of time. I want and I need for you to get used to that idea so that we can figure out what we want to do with life, okay?”

“The only problem is, a child born of a Rogue, especially while in the Rogue state has a higher chance of becoming Rogue. And of birthing a Rogue child. That’s why I think Zhubin is the better choice. Genetically speaking and temperamentally too. I have a foul temper, worse than most Luhpyne and it’s all thanks to dear old Dad. I have to watch it carefully and walk away from situations I know will push me toward that edge.”

Lacey had to think for several minutes but when she spoke it was very quietly. “What if he wasn’t your father?” she asked quietly. “You said that you think that he stole your mother from her mates. What if they were your father, not him? Then there wouldn’t be that Rogue gene in you. And honey, you have a right to be angry from time to time, you truly do. Hell, I’m angry ninety-nine percent of the time, does this mean that I’m a Rogue as well?”

“Given her condition as I recall it, she’d been away from her true mates for a long time. She’d been beaten down to a completely submissive stance. She wouldn’t even look at me without his permission. No, she’d been with him long enough. Plus I know who her true mates are and they’d filed a Missing Persons on her that predated my birth by six years. You’re human, Lacey. Not a Luhpyne that, in a fit of full-blown rage, could level a building if they put their mind to it.”

“Oh, honey. I’m so sorry. How could she have you, though?” she asked honestly. “If during the mating rituals you are mated how would she be able to carry and have another person’s child? That’s why I asked what I asked, love.”

“A woman can become pregnant by another not her mate after the mating if she’s fed a specific concoction. It screws up the system and confuses it. Only a few people know of the mixture let alone how to make it. He bought it from a Spiryte with no morals, that much I do know. No decent Spiryte would ever make that for anyone. It has one use and only one use, the rape and impregnation of a woman not your mate who’s already mated.”

“That’s terrible.” Lacey gasped and found herself squeezing him tighter, holding him closer. “I’m so sorry, Ansell. God, I just don’t think that I have words to tell you how sorry that I am that you have been hurt as you have been. It’s not right, at all.”

“My life wasn’t all that bad,” he said. “Zhubin’s parents are good people. They took me in and gave me a safe place to grow up. And Zhubin’s always been a friend from the moment we met. He’s truly the only reason I keep moving some days.”

“And now you have me. I’m annoying on the best of days and downright a bitch on the worst. I feel bad for you boys, in having me as yours but I will be there. I only need to hear it one last time and then I promise I will not ask you again.” She took a deep breath and whispered, “If I choose Zhubin to be the father of my children, will you be able to remain as a part of our lives when and if we are blessed with them? I never want to lose you, Ansell, and if it means no children then we won’t have them but I have to know. I need to know and then I will let it rest.”

“I will always be a part of your life, Lacey,” he told her. Reaching out he cupped her face and looked into her eyes. “Whether you choose Zhubin to be the father of the children or whether you choose never to have them, I will be there. I do not want any of my own but I will always care for and guide any you may have. I may even love them but I can’t promise that. I have to keep a fairly tight lid on my emotions but you’ve already broken through, something I’d never have guessed at.”

“And if I do choose to have children, will you still love me as much then as you do now?” Lacey wanted the honest truth from him. For now. For all time. She wanted to know how he felt about everything because it was the only way she could make the choice she needed to make.

“Probably even more,” he told her with a small, crooked smile. He leaned in closer, their noses just brushing. “Nothing will change my feelings for you, Lacey. Nothing ever could,” he added in a rather vehement tone.

“Good. I never want that to happen. It would hurt me to my very core if anything changed how we felt for each other. I’ve fought so long against my feelings, trying to protect you when you really never needed it and now that I’m accepting it, I want it all,” she warned him. “Everything, Ansell.”

“I can’t promise everything but I will try, for you.” Pressing a kiss to her lips, he pulled back and turned his head toward the doorway. “Didn’t you mooches get anything out of Zhubin?” he asked. The wolves let out a whine and, when she turned her head, saw them playing up to herself and Ansell so that they could get more food. Demon was lying on the ground looking like he was passed out while Devil played the wounded paw trick. “I think they get their overly dramatic natures from Zhubin.” Standing, he pulled her up to her feet. “We’d better go and eat or we’ll have to contend with more of this display.”

That had her laughing and she shook her head. “All right, let’s get us some food and we will deal with these two hams later. For now I’m happy just being here and spending time with you,” she assured him happily.

Walking at her side, he waved a hand and the wolves suddenly were back to normal and raced off ahead of them. “Unfortunately, with those two you must deal with them immediately, otherwise they think they can continue to get away with such displays. They are amusing though, most times,” he muttered.

“I think that they are utterly adorable. I know, not a term that I should use for them because I’m very sure that they are deadly, but I honestly do think that they are just too cute. I like them, a great deal. Just as I like you boys.”

“They like you,” he said as they walked into the kitchen. “Just remember that they are wild animals. That while Zhubin has, for the most part, housebroken them, they can revert back.”

“He’s right,” Zhubin said, walking across the kitchen toward the table. “I was lucky and found them when they were young. Their mother had been killed in a trap and they were half-dead themselves. While they grew up in the house and around us they still have their natural predatory inclinations. Though”—he waved a hand toward the two sitting in a begging position—“you would never know it from that.”

She looked at the animals and smiled. “Yeah, they are deadly but I have a feeling those two would do anything at all for you guys. They love you two completely and fully and you both know it as well as I do. Admit it. I love that too. I love that they have such a deep trust in you. It says a lot.”

“As long as I keep feeding them they’ll love me. But God help me if I take a day off.” He chuckled. Pulling out a chair, he looked at her. “Come and sit. We don’t stand on much formality so just dig into whatever you like. Ignore whatever you don’t like. I will admit I asked the docs about allergies and was careful to avoid anything that could potentially harm you.”

“That was actually very sweet of you.” She didn’t think that anyone had ever thought to ensure that she wouldn’t get ill from food before. This was, it was unique and surreal. She liked it. A lot. “Thank you for taking care of me. You have no idea how much it means to me.”

“You’re our mate. It’s our honor, privilege and duty to keep you healthy and happy. Now, did you want a beer, wine, juice, milk or water?” he asked her. He headed toward the fridge and grabbed out two beers before pausing to look her way.

“Beer for me as well, please. We are off the clock and I’m totally going to enjoy myself and have a beer with the two guys that have been running from me every bit as much as I’ve been running from them.”

Nodding, he grabbed a third and came back to the table. He twisted the cap off one and handed it to her. Passing a second to Ansell, he moved to the other spot and sat down opening his own bottle. “I’m slightly offended by the running comment but I suppose it’s accurate enough.”

“Meh, it was me more than you guys. I could have at any time said something. But so could you. So I think we just let it drop and we will take life as it comes now. What do you think about that? I really happen to enjoy that idea, a lot.”

“We’re all equally at fault. Could’ve, should’ve, that’s the past. We all are on the same page now and the future is before us. I say we move forward, ignore our own foolishness and blindness and live.”