Lakota Honor (12 page)

He stopped and waited while her body trembled. She squeezed her hands together and yelled out from the pain, but didn't release them. A low moan came from her throat as she hung her head and sobbed.

He didn't know what to do, and he wasn't sticking around to find out what would happen next. He pulled the medicine pouch from around his neck and laid it on her lap.

"Mix small amounts with water or saliva, and rub it into your hands once a day." He didn't know if she heard him. He watched as she shook her head and muttered apologies to her father. The urge to hold her in his arms stole over him. He took a step back and ran his hand down the length of his face. He grabbed his knife, and looked at her one last time before he walked away.

Nora stood at the graveside while two men lowered her father into the ground. He'd been gone two days, but to her it felt more like an hour. The pain still raw, she brought the white handkerchief to her face and blotted her eyes. Jed purchased the wooden casket and she was grateful for the help. She couldn't afford it and without Pa's income, there would be no money now.

She scanned the faces gathered around, a handful of people had come to see Jack Rushton buried. Aside from Doctor Spencer and the sheriff, she didn't know any of them. They resembled gamblers, unwashed clothes hung from their skeletal frames. She figured they knew her father from the saloon. Her stomach spun. She thought he'd drink himself to death, but she'd been wrong.

She hung her head. He'd died from a wound she couldn't heal. A horrifying moment she wished over and over to have back. She'd have done things differently, given him whiskey so he couldn't fight her, or tried harder to save him. A tear slipped down her face.
I should've tried harder.

The sheriff stood off to the side, still embarrassed he'd been drinking the night Pa was killed. He assured her that he was searching for the killer and wouldn't give up until justice was served. Nora wondered if the killer was among them now.

It could be any one of the people mulling about the open grave site. She took a second look at them. They fidgeted, stepped from one foot to the other and their bloodshot eyes focused on the ground. They were itching to drink. She doubted any of them could aim a gun, much less pull the trigger and kill someone. All they cared about was where they'd get the next drink.

She blew a shaky breath and clutched the handkerchief. Her hands still tender, she loosened her grip on the cloth. Two men shovelled dirt over the coffin. The
scrape, scrape
of the shovels and the silence after they dropped it down the hole, she'd never forget.

Oh, how she wanted to be told it was all a misunderstanding. None of it happened. Pa hadn't died and she wasn't alone. She thought of Otakatay. She didn't know why he'd come the night Pa died, but she was glad, his presence offered comfort.

Had he heard the shot? Did he see her trying to save him? He'd been there afterward. A steady hand to help her when she'd burned herself. She remembered very little of that night, but she'd never forget the concern in his eyes as he smoothed the salve over her throbbing hands.

The shovels pounded on the hill packing the dirt over where her father was buried. He was gone. Her chest tightened. A mound of soil and a small wooden cross were all that was left of Jack Rushton. She blinked back tears and blew a kiss toward the ground.
Goodbye, Pa. I love you.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

It had been six days since Pa's death, and Nora still couldn't make it through a day without crying. Her evenings were plagued with nightmares that carried over into the morning and followed her throughout the day. She was helpless to the visions that swirled in her mind of her father lying dead before her.

She shivered. She was captured within herself, and each day that went by, the burden she carried weighed so heavy she was sure she'd crumble. The pressure pushed her lower and lower, until defeat and exhaustion had her screaming at the walls.

She placed some wood inside the stove and threw in a lit match. She slid the tea pot over the burner. The wood crackled and she inhaled the sweet aroma.

She brushed her hands along her dress and looked at the array of food on top of the counter. There was more in the icebox, a mourner's gift from the townspeople. She hadn't touched any of it and found herself giving it away instead. Seth chopped wood all morning for her, and to show her appreciation she gave him one of the half dozen pies she had. Jess had stopped by yesterday, and she'd insisted the woman take a chicken pot pie home for dinner. She gave her back the gun too, not wanting to be a part of the violence it held.

She stacked the unwashed cups and plates beside the metal bowl on the counter. She'd wash them later. She thought of Jess. The kind woman had begged her to come and live out on the ranch. She made a good argument, too. Nora shouldn't be living alone. They'd give each other company.

The idea was tempting, and she wanted to say yes, but regret over the past lingered within her soul and she declined. She liked the older woman, and didn't want to offend her, but she couldn't afford to be a burden to anyone ever again. She'd been the anchor Pa tugged behind him for years, keeping him from living a normal life. And she'd never forgive herself for it.

She held her hands out. The burns had healed, and she still had feeling in them thanks no doubt to Otakatay's medicine.
I will never use them again. I will live like a normal girl.
No one would ever know she possessed such power. She tucked her hands into her armpits.

There wasn't a cloud in the sky, and a part of her wanted to get out of the cabin. The thick, dense woods called to her. A walk through the forest might be what she needed. Staying cramped inside the house wasn't good. But as she glanced in the direction of the tall trees, she couldn't find the strength to leave. She wrapped her arms around her stomach and leaned against the wall. She missed her father so bad some days she thought she'd die from the pain.

She pulled back the curtain. Wagons rolled by, and people walked in and out of shops. Their lives hadn't been interrupted like hers. A little piece of her resented them for their smiles and carefree attitude. Would the aching inside her heart ever go away?

A tall, dark shadow crossed the street, and she recognized Otakatay immediately. He hadn't come back for his medicine pouch, and she was beginning to wonder if he ever would. She'd used all the herbs inside on her hands and wanted to replenish the leather sack, but didn't know the plant that had been inside.

He glanced in her direction, but she couldn't tell whether he saw her or not. Her heart skipped and she brushed the warm feeling aside. He'd threatened to kill her, scared the devil out of her and kissed her all in a matter of days. Who was he and why did he stir such odd feelings inside of her? She must be crazy to even think someone like him would have the slightest interest in someone like her. He was the opposite of everything she believed in. He killed people. She saved them.
Or at least I used to.

She sighed and her breath fogged up the glass. She wiped it with her sleeve. Her left hand was marked with red slashes that were raised like a welt. A sick feeling settled low into her abdomen, and she inhaled through her nose to ease the q
ueasiness. She should've saved Pa.

He was right. She was cursed. The reason they had run from town to town. The reason her mother died. She'd been selfish and refused to listen. Remorse choked her, and she fought the scream welling up in her throat. She'd never forgive herself for Pa's death.

The tea kettle whistled, and as she poured herself a cup someone knocked on the door.

Joe stood on the porch, leaning into his crutches as sweat glistened from his forehead.

"Hello, Joe. Please, come in." She looked around him for June. "Where's Miss June today?"

Joe shuffled into the cabin and sat down at the table. "She's busy, she's busy."

"Does she know you're here?"

He nodded and smiled.

"I can't believe you walked all the way over here on your own, Joe."

The poor boy was still trying to catch his breath, and her heart went out to him. How he must struggle. Everyday things she'd taken for granted didn't come easy for someone like him, and she felt horrible for the boy. She looked at his legs.
No, I will not even think of it.
She shoved the thought to the back of her mind.

"It was fun, fun." He tossed his head.

She smiled. "Would you like a cup of tea or some water?"

"I've never had tea, tea. Thank you, Nora."

He pulled a pack of cards from his front pocket and placed them on the table. Maybe a game was what she needed to take her mind off what she was going to do now. She took a dirty cup, dunked it in the cold water in the metal basin and dried it with a rag before she poured him a cup.  She cradled the mug in her hand and sat down across from him. Joe's eyes watered and his lip trembled.

"Joe, are you okay?"

"I'm...I'm sorry about your Pa. I'm sorry about your Pa." He rocked back and forth.

Nora's vision blurred and she placed her hand over his. "Thank you, Joe."

He smiled, and it warmed her heart.

Curious, she asked, "Do you remember your mother?"

Joe didn't blink for a long while, and she grew nervous wondering if he was going into a fit.

He shook his head slowly.

"No. I don't remember her, I don't, I don't."

She could see the sadness reflected in his eyes. She had no intention of upsetting him. "I don't remember my mother either."

He squeezed her hand and blinked back tears. For all the things Joe lacked, the boy sure made up for them with compassion. He had a heart of gold, and she hoped Elwood would never steal that from him.

She grabbed the cards and shuffled them. "Let's play, shall we?"

Joe clapped his hands. "Yay, Yay!"

The sun was descending, casting gray shadows around them as she walked Joe back to the hotel. Pal trotted along beside them. The animal hadn't left her side since she'd healed him, and she was grateful. The long nights alone would be unbearable without him.

Joe gazed up at the sky, his blonde brows furrowed, and he moved his sticks faster.

"Joe, is something wrong?"

"It's getting dark, dark, dark." He tossed his head, and his eyelids fluttered.

She placed her hand on his shoulder. "We're almost to the hotel."

He didn't answer, and she moved her hand from his shoulder to his arm, offering support in case he fell. Joe's crutches made loud aggravated sounds as he ran them along the boardwalk. She scanned the street and noticed Fred Sutherland standing in the doorway of the mercantile.

"Good evening, Mr. Sutherland," she said as they passed.

"Good evening." He stepped in front of them. His brown eyes assessed her, and she stepped back. He was staring at her so intently she wondered if she had something on her face. She moved to go around him. He smiled, and pulled two candy sticks from his pocket.

"I know Joe has a sweet tooth, but I wasn't sure if you did."

Her hand shook as she grabbed the peppermint stick. "Thank you."

"Candy, candy." Joe almost jumped into Mr. Sutherlands arms.

The man laughed as he handed the candy over.

"Enjoy." The bell over the door jingled as he went inside.

The hair on Nora's neck prickled, and she pulled Joe along the boardwalk wanting to put some distance between them. Why she felt unsure around him all of a sudden, she didn't know. Goosebumps covered her arms and she pulled her sweater closed.

She glanced back. She could count on one hand the times she'd spoken to Mr. Sutherland. Maybe this was his usual demeanour. He'd been kind enough, and when she'd sold her mother's jewelry he was quite pleasant. She shrugged off the notion that the mercantile owner was anything but kind and continued walking.

Joe sucked on his candy with enthusiasm, and she smiled. The boy was a delight to be around, and she hadn't missed Pa as much while visiting with him today. She wondered why he was so afraid of the dark and decided to ask. "Joe, why don't you like the dark?"

He moved the stick to the other side of his mouth. "It's scary, scary."

"Yes, it can be."

"I go there when I'm bad, when I'm bad."

"When you're bad?"

He nodded.

She wanted to know what Elwood did to Joe when he was bad. Where did he take the boy that was dark and scary? She examined him with her eyes, searching for signs he'd been mistreated.

"Where do you go when you're bad?"

Joe pointed east to the mountain where the mine was. "There in the cave, cave."

"Elwood puts you in a cave?"

"Only when I'm bad, I'm bad."

He wouldn't. She stared up into the hills. He was a nasty man, but to harm a child, one with deficiencies like Joe, was heartless. She tried to process what Joe had told her. Had the doctor known? What about the townspeople, did they know? Were they all looking the other way while Elwood abused his own flesh and blood?

Nora's face heated as burning anger blazed through her. She wanted to confront the bastard. She wanted to stick up for Joe. Why hadn't she noticed before? Why hadn't she questioned Joe about Elwood? Guilt blanketed her, and she tried to push the feeling of suffocation away.
Poor Joe.

She wanted to hug him, to tell him that not all people out there were as mean and vile as his own father. She thought of Pa, and her chest ached. He might've been a drunk, and he'd said unkind things, but he'd never struck her or left her behind.

She helped Joe to the back door of the hotel and was taken aback when he embraced her.

"Bye, Nora, Nora."

She hugged him back. If he could stand straight he'd be taller than her by at least a head. She blinked back the tear waiting to drip past her lashes.

"Goodbye, Joe. Please come by again."

He shook his head. "I go home tomorrow, tomorrow."

"Oh, I see. Well, next time you're in town, come and visit."

He nodded and went into the hotel.

She waited for the door to close behind him before she left. She followed the path behind the buildings back to the cabin, and was pulled into the shadows.

"Well hello, Nora."

Elwood's spicy cologne filled her nostrils, and she squirmed.

"Let me go." She tried to pull herself free of his grip.

He backed her into the side of the hotel and leaned in. The two men he'd had with him at the cabin stood blocking the entrance from the street. "Poor, Nora, you're all alone now, and need someone to take care of you." His fingers skimmed her cheek.

"Thank you for your concern, but I'll be fine." She tried to scoot around him, but he blocked her with his other arm.

"You'd have everything if you married me."

She searched the forest on her left and the street on her right for anyone she could call out to, but with Elwood's thugs blocking them from any prying eyes it was useless.

She tipped her chin and said hotly, "And why would I marry you?"

"Because bad things can happen to a woman living alone, I could protect you."

"I don't need protection."

"Don't you?" His finger skimmed her cheek.

"Please, let me go."

"I'm the wealthiest man within miles."

"What does money have to do with marriage?"

"Why everything, dear, and by marrying me you'll never be without it."

"If you think I'd marry you," She struggled to move away from him, "then you're dumber than I thought."

He laughed, a deep hollow sound, and she watched as his eyes hooded with desire. He brought her hands above her head and rammed his knee between her legs. She moved her head from side to side trying to get away from him. He gripped her chin in his hand and squeezed.

"You will have no choice," he sneered, nuzzling his lips into her neck.

She pressed into the wall behind her, the uneven wood pinched her back as she fought the urge to vomit all over him. The man repulsed her, and she rolled her hips trying to avoid his touch.

He caught her breast within his hand and squeezed.

She whimpered.

A low growl came from beside them.

"Savage, go on. Get outta here." He waved his hand behind him and continued to grind his groin up against her.