Last First Kiss (19 page)

Chapter Twenty-Six

S
AWYER
SWERVED
T
O
miss the little old lady. Scratch that. There was nothing sweet or stooped-back about the woman glaring at him from the middle of the road underneath a black umbrella.

“Grandma, are you trying to get yourself killed?” He stuck his head out the window.

She shook her finger at him. “If that’s what it takes to get you to see sense, then I’ll consider it a death worth dying.”

A few people paused on the sidewalk, watching them curiously. Sawyer swore under his breath and drove his squad car to the curb, then parked it, got out and slammed the door. He set his hand on Grandma’s bony elbow and led her out of the middle of the street.

“Jay-walking is a crime.”

“Good, that was the idea. Book me. Take me in.”

“You want me to arrest you?”

“This is a one-woman protest.”

“It looks like you might need a nap and cup of tea.”

She shrieked in outrage. “Don’t you dare talk to me that way. I remember changing your diaper.”

Sawyer grimaced. “For that, I’m sorry.”

“Bring me in and maybe I’ll be able to talk some sense into that numbskull head of yours.”

“Grandma, I’m the sheriff.”

“And I’m your elder.” She looked up at the sky. “It’s going to start raining like a cow pissing on a flat rock again any second, so let’s cut to the chase. Annabelle Carson sold Five Diamonds.”

Her words hit him like a slug to the gut. “What?” He’d failed.

“Did I stutter? She’s sold the place, and to the worst person you can imagine. I heard that old fat cat King make the call. Ruby preened next to him smug as a cat who got into the cream.”

Sawyer took off his hat, rubbing his forehead. That didn’t make any sense. “Annie would never sell the farm to Ruby.”

“The price was more than right. Your little girlfriend doesn’t care about the farm, or the fact that Ruby will lock it up, tear it down and build a sunken pool, and tennis courts to entertain her Hollywood friends. All that prime land will get mowed under to put in a nine-hole golf course.”

Sawyer’s insides were scoured empty. Ruby said she wouldn’t let him go without a fight, but he never expected this.

“I’ll talk to Annie.” That was it. That was what he’d do. Once he laid out his feelings, she’d see sense and stay.

Wouldn’t she?

A
FTER
A
NNIE
STUMBLED
back inside the coffee shop, she discovered Margot had wheedled Edie into letting her help behind the counter during tonight’s concert and then sleep over in her above-shop apartment afterward. Atticus was tucked in bed, and now the house was too quiet by half.

Truck tires ground up the gravel. She set down the book she wasn’t reading anyway and went outside as Sawyer parked his truck. The nearby pine grove looked dark but not forbidding, and for once the peaks didn’t make her feel lonely. The landscape had a hushed quality, a night for futures to be decided.

Grandma Kane might have spewed mean, hurtful words in town today, but they weren’t anything she hadn’t thought herself. For so long she’d let things happen. Terrible things. Mundane things. Until she’d gone numb. Never asking for what she needed. Ignoring what she wanted.

The truck door slammed.

She grabbed her want and found the feeling fit perfectly. She didn’t have to suck it in or shimmy.

“Annie?” Sawyer called out, a trifle wary as she stood and approached. “I heard you and Grandma had words.”

“I don’t care about what your grandma thinks of me, Sawyer.” Annie wrapped her arms around him. “Follow me.” She led him inside, pointing at the giant blanket fort strung up in the living room. “Atticus and I built it earlier, just like Claire and I used to do.”

“We can’t fit in there, can we?”

“We might have to get cozy, but it’s better here. He’s sleeping upstairs.”

“You convinced me.” They crawled inside and he eased her on top of him, swearing. “Shit, what’s that?” He reached beneath and pulled out a flashlight. He flicked it on and her eyes constricted from the light.

“Sorry.” He lowered the beam so it hit directly on her breasts. “Wow.”

Her shirt had popped a button and a lot of cleavage showed. “I kind of have that whole heaving bosoms thing going on, huh?”

“Whatever you want to call it, they look all right.”

“All right?” She giggled. “That’s the best you’ve got?”

“Your bosoms—your heaving bosoms—look incredible.”

“Incredible, really?”

“Would you prefer fucking hot?”

“I’m like a heroine in my own romance novel, the coy down-on-her luck single mom who is plucky.” She palmed a breast and arched a brow. “And perky.”

“Works for me.”

“And you’re the hero, obviously. Strapping. Sexy. A sheriff, even. Oh my God, we are a cliché.” She reached for his belt. “Do you have a throbbing member?”

“Jesus, Annie.” He looked torn between choking and laughing.

“A rampaging cockstand?” She opened the buckle.

“That sounds dangerous.”

“What about . . . ” She lowered her voice with dramatic flair. “A quivering member?”

“Annie, you know I love talking to you, right? But I’m going to have to shut you up.” He kissed her hard then, and whatever it was that rampaged, quivered or throbbed pressed against her. The flashlight rolled from his grasp as he fisted her hair and she did the same. They kissed each other hard, grabbing as if they tried hard enough they’d merge into one self.

Annie undid his zipper and didn’t think. Tonight she knew exactly what she wanted, and it was high time she had it. Lowering her head, she took him down as far as she could go, her mouth hitting a point where it was full of Sawyer, everything he had to give. Then she drew back, kissing him along his shaft as his mangled words distilled to one refrain.

“Annie. Annie. Annie.” He tried to pull away. “Stop. Please, you don’t have to . . . Aw, shit—”

She shook her head, and the side-to-side motion pushed him in deeper, making him swear again.

“Annie.” He hauled her up against him.

“Why’d you stop me?” She touched her lips, swollen, a little puffy, but in a good way. “Wasn’t it okay?”

“You’re goddamn amazing, but there’s a rule I have.”

“A rule?”

“With you.”

“Okay.” She had no idea what he’d say.

“You come first.”

“What?”

“That’s my rule. I get you off first.”

“Oh . . . ” Her brain exploded in a silent burst. She was vaguely aware that he pulled a condom out of his wallet, that her underwear came off, and that the diffuse flashlight glow caught flecks of gold in his green eyes.

“So good watching you respond to me.” He parted her legs, teasing her with the tip, grinning as she squirmed, helpless, shamelessly begging with her body for more. “So good hearing you make those little sounds when I do this.” Inch by inch he buried deeper as she let out an incoherent moan.

He withdrew, but the absence couldn’t even be missed because then he was there, plunging again. Her mind was right there, in this moment. His gaze didn’t leave hers as his hands gathered her hips, tilting them so he could plunge impossibly deeper. This man was inside her, and yet he’d always been there in his own way. She’d carried a piece of him all these years, so now having him here in truth only intensified the experience.

He made a low rasp in his throat and she shivered. She was normally the one gasping and crying out, he was always so focused. What would it be like to get him going? She sucked in a sharp inhalation, clenched around him and whispered the only two words that mattered in this moment. “Sawyer. Yes. Sawyer.”

A definite groan this time. He rode her harder as she leaned up and sucked at the hollow of his neck. His skin flavored with sweat and need.

“You feel so good,” she murmured, and his throat worked hard.

“Fuck,” he muttered through his teeth as she reached to hold his sac in a featherlight caress.

“I have rules too,” she said. His eyes rolled back in his head. She had forgotten the part of her that was playful, liked to try things out, have fun. She’d never been able to be this close to someone while having sex. “My rule is tonight, we come together,” she panted. “Same time.”

“Annie.” He adjusted her so her legs were on the outside, his on the inside and every movement went from amazing to mind-blowing. His pelvis skimmed her clit as his rough callused fingers circled the softest, slickest, most sensitive part of her. When he flicked his tongue against the side of her mouth she opened, let him slide the curve of his lower lip against hers while she gripped his biceps.

It wasn’t a flame within her, it was a conflagration, as if she’d thrown her mask on a bonfire and given him her truest face, and he showed her his. Memories flashed. The long ago day the tall, beautiful boy, all big hands and feet, stared but didn’t speak in the freezer section of the grocery store. She’d glanced at him through the open door and frozen herself, until the glass between them fogged and she dropped her head in embarrassment. The next time he approached she’d been in the river, and she hadn’t understood the look on his face, but liked the way that he’d watched her.

She wrapped her legs around him and pressed her forehead against his chest as he increased the rhythm.

“Eyes on me, Annie Girl.” He gritted his teeth, his one bracing arm shuddering as his strokes took her to the edge. She hovered a moment, toes curling. One last rolling thrust and she jumped, knowing he fell alongside her, holding her hand the whole way down.

Afterward, she lay with her head on his shoulder, fingers entwined. They hadn’t said much. Words seemed strange, useless things to describe the journey they’d taken.

This man lit up her life like the North Star, yet on the kitchen table sat an offer of sale for the house. What to do? Stride forward toward the light, even as it seemed so high, painfully beautiful and unattainable, or spin and spin and find herself in a new place, with a new start, a new life?

“I . . . ” Sawyer smoothed back her hair and wrapped his arms around her. The house was quiet. They hid in their blanket fort inside this stolen moment of time. “I don’t always have an easy way with words.”

She squeezed his hand. Something told her he’d opened up to her more in the last few weeks than he ever had with anyone. “It’s okay.”

“But sometimes there are things that need saying.” He rolled her gently onto her side, wincing as they separated. His hard pectoral muscles tightened. “I need to tell you that I’m falling—” His phone rang and he muffled a curse. “That’s work. I have to take this.” He tugged his phone out of his pocket and answered, “Kane here. What? Shit. On my way.” He hung up and looked over.

“Duty calls?”

“Yeah, a car accident got called in outside town. I’ll be back as soon as I can, okay?” He gave her a kiss on the forehead.

“Of course.”

He sighed and kissed her again, a light brush on the lips. “You know how hard it is to leave when you look like this?”

She patted her head. “A half-drunk porcupine?”

“Nah. Like a woman who’s been well-loved.” And with that he was gone, and the blanket fort was hers alone.

Falling. He was falling. She was too, but the thing about falling was eventually you hit, splattered, and then the fun was over.

She pressed her hands over her face, couldn’t bear to wake from this dream. Falling in love was one thing, but what happened after the fall was the scary part.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

A
NNIE
WAITED
BUT
Sawyer didn’t return. At four in the morning, she wandered into the kitchen and flicked through the deed of sale. Who was this mystery buyer? This was a big decision, and to pass the farm off to a nameless stranger made it seem as if she cared far less than she did. There was a lot of money at stake, and even more family pressure, but how could she leave Sawyer?

The laptop sat on the table, and she flicked through old blog comments that did nothing to make her feel better. Everyone expressed positivity, validated her choices, but they didn’t know anything about her, the real her. She might as well be a fictional character. It was amazing and kind that they took time to reach out, but maybe it was time to be honest. Show her life, warts and all.

Joy of joys—Ms. Hootenanny had left another comment.
I don’t believe in you.

“I don’t believe in me either,” Annie said out loud.

Dad had sent a new email.

Any update on the sale of Five Diamonds? Found a place here in Mexico I want to buy. Send an update asap because I can’t make an offer until I know what we can expect to earn.

Her heart sank. Even if she didn’t want to sell the farm there were still two others in her family who’d profit and who didn’t have their hearts beating in a fast rhythm because Sawyer had touched them in the mysterious space between the soul and heart.

Why couldn’t life be a simple straight line for once?

She bent, crying soundless tears into her hands when the back door shut.

“Hey,” Sawyer said, stepping inside the kitchen.

She wiped her eyes. Why did he hover, his face so tense and pale? “What’s the matter?”

He braced his hand against the fridge. “The car accident tonight—it involved Margot.”

“No.” She tried to stand and fell back against the chair. “No!”

“I’ll be okay,” Margot chimed in, ducking under Sawyer’s arm. Her eye was bruised black, her right arm in a sling.

A low sob escaped her. “You’re okay?” She rose, this time keeping a firm grip on the table. “Why didn’t anyone call me?”

“I tried to. You never picked up. She’ll be fine. The wrist sprain is the worst of her injuries. I had her checked from head to toe.”

How had she not heard the ring? Annie grabbed her phone. “Crud. The battery’s dead. What happened?”

“We were hit,” Margot said, giving Sawyer an uncertain look.

Annie dug her fingers into her temple. “We? You were supposed to be spending the night with Edie.”

Margot shifted her weight and stared out the window.

“She was with my brother,” Sawyer said with a tired frown.

“Archer? Margot, you were out driving with Archer? Alone?”

“Yes, but . . . ” Margot shook her head, curls bouncing around her shoulders. “But it’s not like it sounds.”

“No buts. I’m responsible for you while you’re in Brightwater.”

“First—I’m eighteen,” Margot said, like a stubborn child. “Second—he wasn’t . . . we weren’t . . . ”

Sawyer clasped a hand on Margot’s shoulder. “Why don’t you go upstairs, take the pain pill prescribed by the doc and go to bed?” The younger girl flounced out without a backward look.

“I was handling that,” Annie snapped. “You shouldn’t have interfered.”

“You were misunderstanding the situation. Archer was taking her home. Edie got one of her migraines during the concert.”

Annie gave a huffy laugh. “That’s what he says. You know what he’s like.”

“My brother might be a lot of things, but he’s no liar,” Sawyer said tightly. He sat heavily and focused on the real estate papers spread across the kitchen table. “So it’s true then. You’ve been made an offer.”

“How did you—”

He looked straight at her, his gaze almost furious. “A private buyer, very discreet?”

Annie nodded uncertainly. What was going on?

“I was going to talk to you about this earlier, before we got distracted. Your buyer is Ruby.” His smile was humorless. “You are selling Five Diamonds to Ruby, Annie.”

“What?” Annie jerked with surprise. “I didn’t know, I swear.”

Sawyer set his hat on the table with a heavy sigh. “Maybe not, but that’s what’s happening. She was also driving the car that hit Archer and Margot, and blew twice the legal limit. She’s damn lucky no one was killed.”

Ruby had driven drunk and hit Margot? Red rage rose behind Annie’s eyes. “I am going to murder her with my own bare hands.”

“She’s at the station with Leroy, I recused myself before I did just that. Annie, I’ve tried not to push you on this, but why? Why do you have to sell?”

“It—It’s so much money, Sawyer. Insane money, the kind that can set you up for a whole new life.”

“But money isn’t what matters to you, Annie. I know you.”

“Be fair. The property isn’t only mine, Sawyer. Claire owns a stake, and so does my dad. There’s no way I’ll sell to Ruby.” She reached out her hand. “But I have to sell. I
have
to.”

“Tell me. What am I?” He stepped away until all she had in her grasp was empty air. “Someone good enough to fuck but not good enough to settle down with?”

“Sawyer.” She flinched. “No, stop.”

“I’ve tried to be patient and take it slow. And where has it gotten me? I’ve been here before. But with you, it hurts a lot more.” He turned around and kissed her hard, past the point of sense. His tongue, angry and demanding, tangled with hers and drew out a response despite any wish to the contrary. She was fisting her fingers into his hair before she could form a coherent thought, and then he tugged her free and stepped away.

“Anyone can do that, fit their body parts together,” he growled, breathing hard. “It doesn’t mean anything. That’s what people say about flings, right? We do what feels good in the moment and walk away.”

“Sawyer,” Annie gasped. “Listen to me. You aren’t a fling.”

“I think that’s exactly what I am. But I’m not sticking around to watch another woman walk out of my life because Brightwater isn’t good enough—because I’m not good enough. Especially not if that woman is you. I can’t do that—I won’t.”

“Sawyer, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what’s right.” Her voice was quivering.

“Do what you need to do.” He bunched his hands into fists. “Sell and leave Brightwater, Annie. Go to San Francisco and chase your perfect dream. But tonight? I’m the one who is walking away.”