Lasting Damage (8 page)

7.

 “You look like crap,”

Harper
looked up to see Riley, his arms wrapped around a cardboard box, and a
perplexed look on his face.

“Thanks,”
Harper smiled at him. She’d been sitting in the studio staring at her computer
so long she risked growing sloth algae on her skin. After Jane left she’d made
a few pathetic attempts to pull her head out of her ass but nothing seemed to
work. She was incapable of gaining momentum, and with every second that passed the
mess she’d made sank deeper into her skin.

Things
with Jane were fucked up, her album was a stinking pile of shit, her agent was
already emailing her upcoming tour dates and her tour manager was on her ass to
tighten up the riders ahead of schedule.

 “I
didn’t sleep much last night,” she muttered.

“I
figured.” He sat down in the chair next to her, put the box on the floor feet
and fished out a long, double ended cable. “Jane called me. She sounded pretty
icy.”

“Sorry
about that.” Harper stared into her coffee cup and wished she had the ability
make things better. It seemed like such a good superpower to have now that she
was faced with the prospect of everything in her life turning to shit.

Riley
unwound the cable and stretched it out on the tabletop before fishing a new
adapter out of his shirt pocket. “Not that it’s any of my business but what’s
going on between the two of you?” He asked while he started unscrewing the old
plug in from one end of the cable.

“Nothing
now,” she shrugged. “I screwed up.”

“What
did you do?”

“I
was an asshole.” Harper wondered how she could explain that it wasn’t what she
did that sent Jane running for the hills but what she hadn’t done. A lie of
omission was just as nasty as any other lie but much easier to swallow when
you’re the one committing the offense.

“Not
exactly the word I’d use to describe you.” Riley put the new adapter on the end
of the cable and promptly began winding the whole thing back up.

“I
didn’t tell her about knowing you and she came in here and saw me,” Harper
paused to take a sip of her coffee. “I didn’t have a good excuse ready.”

“That’s
probably a good thing.” Riley replied. 

“Why’s
that?”

“Because
Jane has this weird ability to see through people’s excuses and call them on
their bullshit.” He eyed her carefully before dropping the cable into the box
at his feet and grabbing another. “And you do not want that happening to you.”

“Maybe
you could’ve warned me before you sent me over to there?”

“I
told you she wasn’t an easy person to deal with.” He sat back and started
examining the cable. “Jane’s been through a lot.  She was a girl growing up on
a tour bus. She had to learn to be tough and not take shit from anyone. I’ve
seen her crack a few heads when she has to. She doesn’t trust many people so
she doesn’t have a lot of friends, but the ones she does have are damn lucky
because she takes care of them. Just don’t piss her off unless you’re willing
to run very far and very fast.”

“I’ll
have to remember that.” Harper resisted the temptation to close her computer
and head to bed. As tired as she was, and as miserable as she was, giving up
wasn’t an option. Jane might be a lost cause but she had to get the album
finished. “So, what’s the story with Kara? Were you able to work something out?”

“She’s
got some time at the beginning of next week.” He picked up his coffee cup and
took a healthy swig. “Her manager’s going to put in a call tomorrow when he
gets back to his office.”

Harper’s
brain immediately started spinning again. She knew her ex-girlfriend needed the
work as much as she needed her singing ability but dealing with Kara felt like
adding more complication to her growing list of complications

*****

“Did you Google her yet?”

“No.”
Jane answered. She’d hoped Alice would find some new distraction on the way to
Sammi’s but she was wrong. For half the night, and the better part of the
morning Alice had bothered her about Harper and Jane was starting to entertain
murderous thoughts.

Alice
turned, shooting her a dirty look before she asked, “Why the hell not?”

“Because
I'm not interested.”

“You
might be the stupidest person on the face of the earth.” Alice announced as
they walked through the dining room.

“Thanks.”

Alice
rolled her eyes. “Chloe and Lily say that she really likes you and seeing as
how you’re basically a very unlikable person-”

“Shut
up Alice,” Jane interrupted, pushing her sister past the tables and toward the
bar.  “I am perfectly likable.”

“Said
no one ever.” Alice hopped up on a barstool and proceeded to make herself at
home.

“Hey
Danny.” Jane motioned to the sulky looking hipster behind the bar.  “Is Sammi
around?”

The
disinterested bartender with the pale blond beard stared at her for a long,
silent moment before shrugging his bony shoulders and letting out a deep sigh. “She'll
be out in a minute. I think she’s putting her lipstick on.”

“That
could take a while.” Alice chuckled.

“Be
nice.” Jane warned. “Sammi’s still trying to get a handle on her daytime makeup
routine.”

“Someone
has told her that less is more, right?”

“That’s
really funny coming from you.” Jane folded her arms on the bar and glared at
her little sister. “Sammi’s happy for the first time in her life and I’m not
having you turn into a heteronormative assnugget because you don’t understand
what she’s been through.”

Alice
rolled her eyes. “Can we talk about Harper now?”

“Nope,”
answered Jane.

“Are
we allowed to talk about Mom?” she asked. “She hasn't gotten arrested or
flashed her tits for a while. I’m beginning to wonder if she isn’t losing her
touch.”

“She’s
gone soft in her old age.”

“Dad
said she's working her biography again.”

“That
should be interesting,” Jane mumbled. “I’ve always wanted to have all my family
secrets put on display for her fans.”

 “Do
you know if she’s got a title yet?” Alice slid her hand over the smooth bartop
as her eyes moved along the rows and rows of neatly placed bottles behind the
bar. Her mother, and her autobiography were two subjects Jane never wanted to
think about. She’d already lived through most of it once so the idea of putting
it into print made her head pound.

“Not
yet,” Jane replied, she felt a sudden thirst for something strong and sharp.”Can
I get a dirty martini.”

“Sure.”
Danny nodded.

“Make
it with IDÔL.” She instructed. “I don’t have the head for drinking gin right
now.”

“Sure.”

“Me
too.” Alice chimed in. “Only make mine a double since Sami's footing the bill.”

“Is
she?” Danny raised a suspicious eyebrow.

“We’re
here at Sammi’s request so we’re drinking for free,” replied Alice.

“I’m
here at Sammi’s request.” Jane reminded her while she watched Danny make the
martinis. “You’re just tagging along.”

Alice
stared straight ahead and didn’t say anything, she simply flipped her big
sister the bird.

“You
know what I miss?” Alice mused when Danny slid both glasses in front of them
and promptly moved to the far end of the bar where there was less noise and
prettier females.

“Having
me around full time?” Alice put the glass to her lips and winced after she took
the first sip. “God, why do you drink these?”

“I
like the taste.” Jane shot back. “And no, I don’t miss having you around full
time.”

“Fine,
what do you miss?” Alice slid her drink toward Jane and signaled to Danny who
was now at the far end of the bar chatting up a sun burnt blonde with pale lips
and a see through top. 

“Cigarettes,”
Jane answered

“Seriously?”

“Every
once in a while.” She shrugged. “Just when I'm drinking. Maybe I'll grab a
bottle of Russian Standard and a pack of Turkish Gold’s on my way home. I can
sit on the porch smoking and drinking till I pass out.”

“That
sounds like a hell of a way to spend a Monday.” Alice signaled again and got no
response from Danny.

“Hey,
Barboy!” Jane slapped her hand on the bar, raising her voice past the point of
politeness to get the bad bartender’s attention. “Sissypants here needs a new
drink.”

“You
know, you could just come behind here and do it yourself since it’s what you’re
here to talk to Sammi about.” He suggested without turning around.

“Fine.”
She hopped off her stool and made her way to the other side of the bar.
Normally Jane wouldn’t step behind a bar that someone else was tending, but
seeing as how the guy was being a complete dick she figured she’d forgo the
normal rites of polite bartending, and make her sister something decent for a
change. “What are you in the mood for?”

“Something
that makes me think of summer in New England?” She rested her chin in the palm
of her hand and sighed. “Something that reminds me of being at the beach in
Nantucket. Like when we used to go hang out at Lily’s grandparent’s house and
watch all the fancy, rich people get drunk.”

It
was a tall order but Jane was just happy Alice hadn’t requested one of the six
drinks most people in their early twenties ask for when they belly up to the
bar.  “How about a nice refreshing Cape Codder to take the edge off?”

“What’s
that?”

“Vodka
and lime with cranberry juice.” Jane told her. “It’s like a screwdriver for
aged preppies.”

“Okay
but do it up fancy.” She nodded and blinked her big blues eyes. “Put a lot of
vodka in it.”

“You
know, Alice, sometimes the trick to a good drink is simplicity.” Jane picked up
her martini glass and took a sip. “You were right about this one, though. That
guy does not know how to make a decent martini.”

“Told
you it was gross.”

“It’s
not supposed to taste like that,” Jane grabbed a highball glass from the rack
and started measuring the cranberry juice into the chilled shaker while Alice
watched. “He’s too heavy handed with the vermouth.”

“Jane?”

“That's
me.” Jane placed the ice cold drink in front of Alice while her stomach took a
sudden and step nosedive into parts unknown. Sarah Jacobs, noted girlfriend
stealer and evil frenemy from high school stood next to Alice with a sweet
smile on her pretty face. “Alice? Why don’t you go in the back office and play
with Nat?”

Alice
picked up her drink, turned to look at Sarah, and slunk off without a word.

“You
probably don’t remember me,” she paused for a brief second. “We went to high
school together. I’m Sara Jacobs.”

Jane
nodded.

“Are
you bartending here?” Sara tucked a stray strange of hair behind her ears and
smiled.

“For
the moment,” Jane answered.  

“It’s
a really cool place. I was actually dropping off an application off with the
manager.”

“I
didn’t know they were hiring?” Jane, never one to take the highroad unless she
was bribed, decided to play nice for once and make small talk a person she
didn’t want to talk to.

“It’s
for a position in the kitchen.” She nodded nervously as she took a seat. “There’s
a rumor going around there’s going to be an opening for a new sous chef and I decided
to jump on it before anyone else had a chance to get in line ahead of me.” She
spoke so fast it made Jane wonder if she was trying to make sure there was not
a second of dead air in her life. “I’ve just moved back to Portland and I’d
love to work here.”

“Best
small city for foodies in the countries.”Jane wanted to ask her about her plans
for Paris but decided against it since there was something very sad behind
Sara’s big brown eyes.

“I
missed being here.” Sara tapped the bar with her thumb and smiled. Everything
about her looked anxious and insecure, which piqued Jane’s curiosity. “It’s
been a long time.”

“Did
you move back recently?”

 “Yes.”
she let out a breath and leaned forward a little. “We’re just getting settled
in and it’s all still sort of crazy.”

“We?”
Jane asked the question against her better judgment.

“Robin
and I,” she stammered. “You remember Robin?”

“Sure.”
She looked down to grab a rag and start wiping down the bar but apparently no
one had bothered to keep them stocked.  “Of course I remember her.”

“We’ve
been together for a long time.” She bit her lip, lowering her eyes to the
wooden bar top directly in front of her.

“So?”
Jane decided the best course of action was to deflect the current topic of
conversation and hope for the best.  “What are you drinking this afternoon?”