Lawfully Yours (22 page)

“Then I want to hear you say it again.”

I gulp air and brace myself. “I have fallen in love with you, Jordan Grant.” It’s getting hard to talk further. My blood is pounding. The sound thumps through my ears.

“I wasn’t sure I was ever going to hear you say that,” he says softly. “It’s my fault. Everybody should know I love you. I’m sorry I hurt you. Sorry we had to break up in order for me to realize that you are the center of my life. A day without you is barely worth living.”

I nod, wide-eyed and silent, not daring to breathe.

“I want to be with you, Sue. Forever. I am going to make that clear now to everyone at the firm and to you.” He pulls out from his suit jacket’s inside pocket a black velvet box and gives it to me. I open it to find an enormous solitaire diamond perched atop a narrow platinum band.

My eyes widen larger.

“Sue, I am asking for your hand in marriage. Will you have me as your husband?”

I continue my streak of confident answers. “Yes.”

Coming up for air after the best kiss ever, I’m finally capable of words. “There’s only one thing I’d like to change,” I say. “It’s the ring.”

“You’re kidding me. You don’t like it? You sure as hell should. It cost a fortune.”

“I’m sure it did. That’s why I don’t feel comfortable taking it.”

“Stop being silly. I love you. You are going to be my wife. Everything I have is yours.”

“I don’t want people to think money is the reason I married you. I want them to know that you’re not a trophy of some kind.”

“That’s sweet and all, but I no longer care what anyone thinks about me, or the fact that we’re together.”

“I never cared before. But now I do.”

“Think about it before returning the ring. At least sleep on it.”

Sleep isn’t what we wind up doing. But I do decide to keep the ring, at least temporarily. It’s got a job to do on Monday.

CHAPTER 36

I knew Monday morning was going to be interesting and I’m right. Jordan and I, now outed, figure we might as well drive in to work together. After all, what difference will it make if we’re seen getting out of the same car early in the morning?

I’m happy to have a ride. Besides loving his Mercedes, my old Volvo just died. Instead of basking in the fresh glow of engagement, we spent Sunday on the phone with a towing company to have it pulled out of the parking lot where Leila had her reception. Though Jordan promised me a new car to go along with my new ring, I’m not ready for all of these riches to be heaped upon me. Carpooling will suffice for
now. It has the added bonus of giving me extra time with him. But wait—we could soon have a lot of extra time together—we could be fired. So much for getting a new car.

Driving along Asylum Street, Jordan’s face appears cool and relaxed. The grip on his Styrofoam coffee cup, however, reveals knuckles whiter than normal.

“You’re doubting whether you made the right call, aren’t you?” I ask tentatively.

“About deciding to get married?” He laughs.

“Hilarious,” I say deadpan. “You know exactly what I meant.”

He slides his coffee cup down into the dashboard’s cup holder to take my hand. “I know we did the right thing. I was as tired of it as you were. Always lurking about, trying to hide that we’re together.” He kisses my hand. “Don’t worry. If there is going to be backlash at the firm, I’ll take the brunt. If I’m forced out, so be it. I assume I can get enough of my clients to go with me if I go out on my own or wind up at some other firm. Of course, if the clients don’t come with me, Danielle will find her alimony checks arriving a little behind schedule.” He laughs again.

“I’m always amazed at how you can find levity in the worst situations.”

“My only real concern is if there’s any backlash on you. But I think that’s easy enough to handle. If I need to, I’ll simply explain I started the affair while I was your boss, so it’s me who should go, not you. Then, if I need to push back even more, I’ll add that if they fire you, you’d have reason to sue the firm. Especially since I ordered you to lie to cover up our affair. “

“Geez. That’s comfortable.”

“No, but the new bedding set we’re going to buy this weekend will be. No offense to your love of floral patterns, but do you think we can maybe get something a little more guy friendly, like stripes or anything else please? Waking up every day in a sea of roses just doesn’t feel right.”

Glad he’s having a good laugh. “Whatever,” I say with mock-sourness. “If you wanted a wife who’s into home décor, you should have stayed with Danielle.” But Jordan is right. It’s better to stay light-hearted for as long as the day lets us.

It was our plan to get to the office early. We figured that being busy at work would give off an aura of hard at work—come back later. We were further hoping that later would lead to declining interest. We’re parked in the building’s garage at 7:06 a.m. I get out of the car and straighten up, only to feel my stomach flop down.

“Relax,” Jordan says.

“I am relaxed.”

“So am I.”

“Yeah, right.”

We laugh. My squared-off shoulders manage to shrug an inch down from my ears. Walking into the firm’s main reception area makes me recall my first day seeing the great mahogany desk. Instead of presenting myself as Jordan Grant’s newest hire I’ll now be presenting myself as his fiancée. I must have stopped walking because Jordan gently pulls my hand so we can continue on to the main staircase. “Oh, sorry,” I say, quickly following him. We separate one flight up so he can go to his office. I go to my mine, where I’m greeted by an office memo placed on my chair.

It reads simply, like Jordan’s notes to me. Only this one isn’t from Jordan. It says:

Susan,

Please see me immediately upon your arrival.

Thank you,

Larry

Well, it looks like no matter how early Jordan and I got to the office, Larry got in even earlier. Funny, he wasn’t even invited to Leila’s wedding. Word certainly travels quickly in this gossip-fueled firm.

I pick up the phone and dial Jordan’s number.

“Yeah, I got one, too. I was just going to call you. Do you want to walk in together?”

“I think so. I’ll meet you by the elevator on your floor.”

Once again, I’m off to report to Larry’s office to discuss a topic that
I know won’t make Larry very happy with me.

“Jordan, Susan, thanks for coming,” Larry says, gesturing toward the guest chairs. We comply, looking as innocent as possible. “I’ll be direct,” Larry says. “You two are dating. I want to know for how long.”

“Oh, that’s what you wanted to say.” I let out an audible sigh and try to look confused. Then Larry looks actually confused, which is good. “When I got your memo this morning,” I explain, “I wondered how you knew about our engagement.”

“Engagement?” Larry blinks rapidly.

“Well, yes,” I continue as innocently as possible. “When I got your memo, I figured you wanted to offer your congratulations.” I extend my left hand so he can see the enormous ring I’m sporting. “You don’t have to worry, Larry. Of course you are invited to our wedding. When we finalize a venue, we’ll send out save the date cards.”

“We’re hoping for as a fast a date as possible,” Jordan jumps in. “But we don’t want to settle for having it at any old place.”

“You’re engaged,” Larry says with finality. “Good. That should be a good enough resolution to this inter-office dating problem.” He shoots Jordan a hard look. “We’re here to handle other people’s lawsuits, not subject ourselves to one. We don’t need staff members suing for sexual harassment.”

“Yeah,” Jordan says through tight lips. “It’d be bad to have a personnel related sexual harassment suit. Like the need of a female employee to sue the firm for her refusal to date the son of one of its wealthiest clients.”

Larry shoots Jordan a look.

“A lawsuit from me isn’t a problem,” I chirp, smiling at Larry as brightly as I can. “As you know, spouses don’t testify against each other.”

“The firm will send out an office-wide engagement announcement later this morning,” Larry states. “That should quickly kill off all the gossip and speculation. You can both go.”

“Hell, Larry,” Jordan says, “you can at least say you’re happy for us.” I know then that Jordan lied to me. He does like to play press your luck.

“Congratulations,” Larry says flatly.

The firm’s announcement goes out an hour later. Non-stop, I show off my ring. Thankfully, the congratulations we receive throughout the day are much warmer than Larry’s.

I call Jordan early in the afternoon. “Hey, I’m calling you during business hours, and I’m not even going to shut my door.”

“Good. I was going to call you in a few minutes anyway. Let’s have lunch together. You pick the place.”

“The cafeteria.”

“You’re kidding. Now that we can finally be seen together in public, you want to pick the cafeteria? I’m going to marry a woman who has horrible taste? I chose a floral-print loving, chick-flick TV watching, cafeteria-eating woman?” I can hear the amusement thick in his voice.

“If you want to focus on my flaws, don’t forget that
I’m messy, too.”

“Right. I’ll add it to the list. Good thing I really think you’re hot. So, what’s with the cafeteria?”

“I want to go where the people who haven’t gawked at us yet can get their chance to do so.”

“I have to eat a terrible lunch just for that?”

I ponder this for a minute. “You know what, you’re right. Let’s take a road trip. I have a sudden hankering for Denny’s.”

For a few weeks I’ve thought about keeping the ring Jordan picked out, but I’m holding firm to my original decision. We’re back at the jewelry store, the time has come to make the exchange.

Marty bounces up and down, her mouth in a big smile. The salesman at the diamond counter must think my future stepdaughter is suffering from a sugar high. No matter, I know she’s just excited to help me make my decision.

“You’re almost six years old now,” I tell her. “So you’re old enough to have an opinion.”

The salesman places in front of her a tray of rings both Jordan and I like. Marty picks one with a smaller diamond set in bright gold.

“Why do you like this one?” I ask her.

“Because when the light hits it this way,” Marty says, turning the ring to one side, “the diamond looks like it has a heart in it.”

Jordan buys the ring and places it on my finger. But before we leave the store, I make my own purchase: a silver charm bracelet in the smallest wrist size they have. Then I pick out Marty’s very first charm: a Barbie size pink enamel high heel shoe.

EPILOGUE

Wow. I can’t believe a whole year has passed since our wedding. Excavating the top of our wedding cake from the back of the freezer takes a few minutes. My hands feel like they’re frozen, too. With a thud, I drop the box down on the counter so the cake can thaw. With all the freezer space I’ve now freed up, I bet I could stuff in an SUV.

The cake top still looks elegant. The hand-piped scrollwork and fondant are still very much intact. The wedding itself was elegant, too. Bill was the best man, he’d earned that recognition. Leila was my matron of honor. Mrs. Nang came, which made me happy. Less happily, Larry came. My father flew in from New Mexico (without the cactus juice). My mother said perfect things to me all day. The ceremony was blissfully brief.

The best aspect, however, was the photographer we hired. One photograph of me in my wedding gown made it onto Jordan’s office desk. Amid his objects d’art and the sea of gold fabric is an image of me. I find it comforting to be placed permanently in his world.

Shortly after our engagement, I made the hard choice to professionally strike out on my own. I want to be independent and grow by myself. I already have a solid and steady stream of clients from David and enough expertise to handle them. I love my new office. David got me a good deal on the lease.

Jordan periodically talks about leaving Grovas to partner with me, but I tell him I don’t want him to leave the place where he became a success. I’m ready to be my own success, and I needed to leave Jordan’s professional shadow in order to do this. I have his love to lean on instead, and that’s enough for me.

All my life, I’d chosen to be by myself. Now I want to be surrounded by family. In fact, our family is set to grow. Our most recent trip to the jewelry store was to buy Marty her second charm. Jordan and I plan to help tiny little hands give the present to her at the end of our nine-month term. The charm says in bright silver letters “#1 Big Sis.”

Marty will have lots of opportunity to be the big sister. Our brand new house is big enough for her to have her own room, even if we do only have her part-time. No more pullout couches for her. To us, nothing says more to Marty she’s permanently in our lives than giving her a bedroom of her own. We’re letting her pick out the paint color and furniture set, which is good since my home furnishing ability will always be challenged at best.

In fact, to decorate the rest of the house, I’m getting some input from Danielle. Jordan isn’t too thrilled, but he does acknowledge it helps me smooth out the stepparent situation. Danielle’s suggestions aren’t too bad, either. And she (like Melba) is much more reasonable than I would have expected. No ornate molding for me or luminescent paint jobs. No statues of three-inch Chinese men riding horses. Instead, Danielle gives me magazine clippings of furniture options that have clean, simple lines. No floral fabric.

I’m letting my mother help decorate, too. Her fashion sense was always better than mine, anyway. Involving her in my domestic decisions lets her know, despite my periodic inability to show it, that I do value her input. And I do value having a husband and a home.

I love working, but I now know there is more to life. Even during my time at the firm I learned more about life than I did about law. More important than growing professionally is growing personally. More important than knowing the grounds for litigation is knowing the grounds for love.

But the most important thing? Being brave enough to open up to the one you love, no matter how strong the insecurity.