Leap of Faith (La Flor #1) (12 page)

Beautiful.

Last night, I loved being in his arms and his kisses—well, those put me on fire and something else. He took care of Julia and me and made sure we made it home safely. The notion of this bigger-than-life man asking my two girls for anything is surreal. How can I say no to him? Do I really want to let this opportunity pass?

No, I don’t.

He’s right; we need to talk to the girls. I can’t let my fears keep me from experiencing something that might be great. If this doesn’t work out, at least both girls will know that their momma wasn’t afraid to take a risk. We’ve been through much worse and made it through.

Taking a deep breath, I look at him.

“You’re right, Zane. We need to speak with the girls and inform them about us. I do want you and I’m not gonna let my fears keep me from being with you. We need to tell the girls they’ll always come first; they’re my first priority. Always. Just don’t hurt me, please.” I pause for a second. “Um . . . I don’t think you’ll have a problem with Skylar. She thinks you look like one of her Disney princes; she wants to keep you and was pretty upset when Rylee told her we couldn’t keep people.”

As soon as I finish speaking, Zane scoops me into his arms and claims my mouth.

Mmmm.

Delicious.

The kiss is even better than I remember from last night.

“Thank you, baby,” he says. “I thought I was gonna have to do battle with you again to get you to see things my way. You enjoyed being in my arms last night, but I didn’t know if you were gonna blame the alcohol or agree that it’s the strong pull between us that led to the incredible night we had.” He places our foreheads together, not giving me a chance to be anywhere but in his arms.

I can see now I wasn’t the only one that was afraid. I was afraid to take a chance on him and he was afraid that I was going to reject him. I never thought this big strong man would be afraid of anything, but I was wrong. We all have fears.

I just pray that I’m not making a mistake in bringing him to the girls too soon. Things are moving incredibly fast between us, as if an unknown force is pushing us together—pushing me to be with him—but it just feels so right, like it was meant to be. I feel like I belong with him. I pray he decides to stay with us after he finds out my tiny little secret. Right now is just not the time to bring it up.

From that first moment I saw him, I knew he was going to change my world. I wasn’t ready for him then and that’s why I ran; I was scared of the feelings he awakened in me. Back then, I still hadn’t let go of the past. I wasn’t ready to move on. Now, moving on doesn’t mean that my love for Jake is ending, because I will always love him. He was my husband and he gave me the most wonderful gifts a man can give a woman—he gave me his love, his devotion, his last name, and he gave me two beautiful daughters. I thought he was my forever. When we married, we believed we had a future together. We couldn’t have known life had other plans for us. I’ll always be grateful for the years we shared, and I’ll always treasure our time together. But now, I have to close that chapter in my life and begin a new one.

Zane will be a new chapter in my life that I’m going to enjoy wholeheartedly. We’re going to be “us” and we’ll see what life has planned for us.

Zane

Thank you, God.

She’s not going to fight me. This morning, I thought I was going to have a fight on my hands, but I was wrong. I feel a huge weight lifted from my shoulders and everything is starting to fall into place.

She’s going to take a chance on me—on us.

Thank you.

After our conversation, we called the girls into the living room and we spoke to them about our newfound relationship. I told them I really liked Zane and Zane really liked me. I had to speak in simple terms so Skylar could understand. Zane spoke to them about his desire to get to know not only me but them as well, and how he was going to do his very best to make us happy. We told them we would be going out on dates both as a couple and all together. After several dates, we were going to introduce each other to our families, meaning their grandparents and his parents. It was a new adventure for all of us, but we were doing it together.

I was worried Rylee would be upset since she remembers our time with Jake and she was his little princess, but I was wrong. She was happy I was going to date again and that the person was Josilyn’s uncle, someone we knew.

“I’m glad you’re gonna go out with Mr. Zane, Momma,” she tells me. “I’ll never be upset because I know how much you loved Daddy and how you did everything possible to make our lives run smoothly and us into a strong and happy family. Your love story was one for the fairy books, but he’s not here anymore. I also remember your struggle after he died to keep us together and to make sure his dream lived on. You deserve this and so much more. Daddy would want you to be happy and
I
want to you to be happy. If Mr. Zane makes you smile again, I’m not going to stand in your way. I love you always and forever, no matter what. Plus, he’s really hot for an old guy,” she adds, grinning. “You’ve done good, Momma.” Before I can reply, she runs away laughing. That girl thinks she’s so funny. I pray my baby girl finds her prince again someday and he loves her like her daddy did me.

As for Skylar, that girl was ecstatic.
Ecstatic.

“So does this mean I get to keep him?” she asks, all excited.

Before I can reply, Zane answers. “Yes, princess, y’all get to keep me.”

Well, there it is. We get to keep him. Please, God, let that be true. I really,
really
like him. Please . . . I send a prayer up above.

16 February 2013

When you’re happy, time just flies by. Before we know it, four “us” dates, four family dates, and numerous dinners together at my house have passed and we’ve managed to meet during the day for lunch during our busy work schedules. I’ve managed to keep him away from the office until I work up the bravery to let him know what I do and who I work with.

And now, we’re at the point where we get to meet his family. I don’t remember being this nervous when I first met Jake’s parents; maybe I was too young to know the significance back then, or in my pretty little mind, I just knew nothing could go wrong. That attitude is totally different now. Oh boy. I pray that this goes well.

I just can’t help all the different thoughts running through my head. What is his family going to think of me? Most importantly, what is his
mother
going to think of me? After a very excited Jackie phoned me with questions and then congratulations, she told me that Zane’s a really big mommy’s boy. He’s the baby of the family and the only boy out of five children; therefore, the apple of his momma’s eye. It’s just peachy for me.

After giving myself pep talks all week, the day finally arrives. It’s Josilyn’s birthday party. Of course, all of us going is a must; Rylee is Josilyn’s BFF and I’m Zane’s woman. Yes, woman. I called myself his girlfriend once and he quickly corrected me.

“Babe, I’m your man and you’re my woman. What we have isn’t high-school shit, it’s real. So none of this boyfriend/girlfriend crap. Understand?”

So now, I find myself decked out in Miss Me black shorts with bling on the back pockets, a mint-green mesh three-quarter sleeve shirt with a same-color tank underneath, and black wedges. My hair is in a side braid, my jewelry matches my shirt, and my make-up is neutral. I look at myself in the mirror and give myself a thumbs up on this Bar-B-Q get together-worthy outfit. I’m right in the middle between dressy and casual—perfect.

Rylee’s in Miss Me blue jean shorts, a sparkling loose sleeveless cream blouse, and gold gladiator sandals. Her make-up is so light, you can’t even tell she has any on. And Skylar, well, that girl is a mixture of pink and purple with a bit of turquoise thrown in for accent. Like I said before, mini-fashionista and she manages to pull it off beautifully.

We gather in my room and check each other over and agree we look beautiful like always. I’ve made it my mission to instill in my girls that we’re always beautiful. I don’t want either of my babies to be self-conscious about their bodies; if our clothes start fitting us a bit tightly, we’ll go exercise or we’ll just buy new clothes that fit our bodies better. My girls are beautiful, no matter what shape or form they take.

Deciding that we’re ready to go, we head to the kitchen to wait for Zane and have some sweet tea.

“Did you find the present you wanted to buy Josilyn?” I ask Rylee.

“Yes, I did and Skylar decided that Josilyn just
needed
some purple and pink slap bracelets,” she tells me. “So aside from my present, she’s also getting slap bracelets and a princess card.”

She tries to sound put out by her little sister’s antics, but I know she enjoys them and loves her very much. For years, it’s just been the three of us and Julia. Yes, we’ve had Gunner and the guys, but when it came down to it, it’s been us girls against the world. As a result, we’re extremely close and I’m very grateful the girls welcomed Zane into our little mix.

Five minutes later, the doorbell rings and Skylar runs to answer. She asks who it is and when Zane answers, she throws open the door and launches herself at him. Having gone through this numerous times before, Zane is ready for Skylar and catches her. He picks her up, holds her like she’s the most precious thing in the world, gives her a kiss on the forehead and turns to us. He heads to Rylee and gives her a hug before making his way to me.

“Hey, baby. You ready?” He asks and gives me my hello kiss.

Every time I see him with my girls or hear him speak to me, my heart melts. Whenever we’re together, he always takes the time to show us he cares for us and no matter how much my girls chatter and fight with each other, he never gets annoyed. He enjoys every moment with us and tells me they’re precious memories for the later years.

“We’re just waitin’ on you, honey. Do you want to take your truck or the Jeep?” I ask.

“We’ll take the Jeep, since the car seat is in there already and if we decide to both drink, Rylee can drive the Jeep home. The truck’s too big for her.”

His truck is an awesome Dodge Laramie Longhorn 3500 black with chrome, the color just like his bike. It’s big. It’s beautiful. It’s
badass!

“Anytime, Zane. Anytime,” Rylee eagerly agrees.

She’s allowed to drive my Jeep only when I need a ride home, which is hardly ever when I have the girls with me and I just recently started going out again. So, anytime she gets to drive it, she’s more than willing. I’d be too if I was her age; my Jeep is freaking
awesome!

Rylee and I head to the kitchen to grab the food we made for the party: cupcakes, cookies, buffalo chicken dip, and rice (all Josilyn’s favorites), while Zane buckles Skylar into her seat. We head out the door, load everything up, climb in, buckle, and set out to meet Zane’s family.

The whole way there I’m giving myself pep talks. I seriously hope his mother doesn’t have anything against me or against my girls. Regardless of what she thinks, Zane and I are together, but it makes it so much easier if I have her approval. And his sisters . . . oh crap, please let them be agreeable and nice. The only one I know is Jackie.