Least of Evils (2 page)

He fought hard to control his excitement as he pocketed a diamond necklace, matching earrings, some sort of tiara with what he thought must be emeralds. There were five rings; diamonds again, plus sapphires and rubies. A double string of pearls and another necklace, which flashed bright-green emeralds as he laid it across his wrist. Should be in a safe, not lying loose in a drawer, these things – more money than sense, some people. There were silver hairbrushes on the surface of the dressing table, but he resisted them: too clumsy to carry and not worth a fraction of what he already had weighing down his pockets.

His torch caught two enamelled miniatures on the surface above the drawers. He hesitated a moment, then slid both of them swiftly into his pocket on top of the jewellery. He'd no idea whether they were worth thousands or worth peanuts, but they were things of exquisite beauty and he coveted them. He knew even as he did it that he was being self-indulgent. Successful thieves weren't swayed by aesthetic impulses, which got in the way of efficiency.

His hyperactive ear caught the first noise he had heard since he had entered the mansion. It was small and a long way away; several rooms at least, his experience told him. But it was a reminder that he should not linger here; he wouldn't wait for a second one. He shut the drawer carefully; you could delay the moment of discovery by several hours, by a whole day if you were lucky, so long as you took care to cover your traces.

He kept his torch on now as he moved to the landing, located the top of the narrow staircase, and left by the route he had chosen so carefully to climb to his killing. It was good information the woman had given him. Perhaps he'd give her a little extra, when he'd disposed of the stuff. He'd see what he got for it first.

There was a moment of panic when he located what he thought was the door to the old library and found himself peering into a much smaller room. He felt his heart pounding, realized how much on edge he was. No bad thing, that. You needed to be hypersensitive to danger when you were bringing off jobs like this. He was in the big league now.

He found the big room at the second attempt. He kept his torch turned downwards upon the carpet and moved carefully past the desk and the armchairs. He was controlling the urge to rush headlong into the near-darkness beyond the window. That was always the urge when you'd almost completed a job. But haste could lead to mistakes; you had to keep your brain working steadily; you were like a car cruising easily in top gear but with bends still to negotiate.

He had pulled the damaged window roughly shut after his work with the jemmy had allowed his entry. He had a moment of panic now, when the shattered wood seemed to have set itself firmly against the undamaged timber of the frame and trapped him within the house. But when he tried pulling from a different angle, the wood eased upwards with the straining groan of a wounded animal. It left a foot of space, through which the cool air flowed into the room as a refreshing draught. His lithe, small-boned body was through the gap in an instant, where bulkier men would have needed more space and made more noise. He was built for this game, body as well as mind.

It was perhaps that moment of fear and the relief which followed hard upon it which upset his concentration now. As he slid horizontally through the aperture and into the coldness outside, he looked back into the house whence he had come, instead of into the new challenge of the wider world outside it.

There was very little light left now. But it was enough to undermine him. He had scarcely registered the cold of the January night when a harsh challenge rang out and chilled his blood. Fifty yards away to his left, from the long shadows beneath the new part of the house.

For a split second, his limbs seemed to be frozen with fright. Then he was away, feet flying over the route he had trodden so carefully twenty minutes earlier. Past the rhododendrons, past the tall firs which had provided such welcome cover as he had crept cautiously towards the house. No caution now, yet the wall he had scaled to enter seemed suddenly impossibly far away.

There were shouts from behind him, a torrent of oaths as he was bidden to stop. But all from one voice, he thought; that must be his comfort. Yet the human brain rarely operates as its owner thinks it should. It now thrust the totally irrelevant thought into the felon's head that it was as well he had left all the bulky items behind in that bedroom, when he should have been thinking only of the route to freedom. He tried to keep the vegetation between him and retribution as he ran.

The wall came at last into welcome view as he rounded the final fir. His very impetus was a help. He had no time to search for crevices in the mortar, but he flung himself upwards with a thrust born of desperation. His hands clutched the top of the wall, his scrambling trainers caught a minimal gap between the bricks. It was all he needed. He thrust with a mighty effort to reach the point of balance atop the wall, then flung one leg over it. Now gravity would ensure that his slight frame dropped clear and triumphant on to the ground outside and the lane which led to freedom.

It was at that point that the first bullet came. He felt the sharp pain against his shin before his ears registered the noise of the shot. For a moment, he thought he had been hit. Then he realized that the bullet had hit the wall beneath him, flinging a fragment of shattered brick against him, but nothing worse.

He hit the ground more heavily in his haste than he had intended, landing with his face in the mould of rotting leaves, forcing the breath from his lungs with the impact. But with the knowledge that the pursuer was armed, fear thrust down every other sensation and took over his being. He scrambled to his feet and was away, his feet beating swiftly upon the welcome tarmac of the lane. He could outrun all pursuit. For no reason at all, he saw the unseen presence behind him as heavier and slower than he was.

The feeling was reinforced by another outburst of obscenities as the man scaled the wall behind him. The odds were with the intruder now. He could surely outdistance this toiling and breathless opponent.

Except that the invisible enemy was armed.

The intruder did not look back, did not see the heavy figure drop on to one knee and take aim at his flying target. The first shot hit the road beside him sparking unnaturally bright with the impact, flinging grit into his panting face. The second hit his arm, but he scarcely felt pain through his fear.

He was sprinting flat out now. And he was right, he was quicker than his pursuer. Without the weapon, he would have escaped. But the third bullet hit his thigh and brought him down. His right leg was useless, even as the left tried to race on with a momentum of its own. He fell in a crumbling heap upon the road, the sudden agony of the flesh tearing from his palm even fiercer than that of the greater wound beneath him.

Things slowed down abruptly. He was groaning when the man with the firearm arrived, his leg clutched to his chest, the blood flooding through his fingers from the ragged hole in his jeans. The man stood breathing heavily above him for a moment, then began to kick his ribs and his head methodically.

Neither victim or attacker was sure of the moment when the figure on the road became unconscious.

TWO

I
t was a hard winter in East Lancashire, the second in succession. There had been snow on the top of Pendle Hill and the higher mountains of Ingleborough and Pen-y-Ghent to the north of Brunton for seven weeks now. The golf course fairways where former cricketer Detective Chief Inspector ‘Percy' Peach now took his exercise had been frozen hard for the whole of January.

It was the last day of that month and it had been a sunny one. But DCI Peach, climbing the staircase to the penthouse office of Chief Superintendent Thomas Bulstrode Tucker, could see no grounds for optimism. Another clear night to come, another hard frost. And before that, another fruitless meeting with the beacon of inefficiency known throughout the Brunton CID section as Tommy Bloody Tucker.

He pressed the button beside the ‘Head of CID' sign and watched a succession of lights beside it flash before a despairing voice barked, ‘Come!'

Tucker's desk was uncharacteristically strewn with sheets of paper. ‘I can come back later if you're busy, sir,' said Percy hopefully.

‘No need for that, Percy,' said Tucker affably.

Peach noted the use of his first name: always the warning of some Tucker scheme. ‘But I can see you're weighed down with the cares and responsibility of office, sir.' Peach gestured with a wide sweep of his arm at the sheets on the huge desk.

‘Nothing that can't be set aside for my Chief Inspector. Do please take a seat, Percy.'

Something shitty was plainly in the offing. Percy lowered his buttocks to the seat in front of the desk as gingerly as a virgin in a rugby club. ‘Thank you, sir.'

‘And how is the world treating you, Percy? How is married life treating my favourite protégé?'

It seemed to have finally been stored in Tucker's elusive memory bank that Peach had married his former detective sergeant, Lucy Blake, an event which had brought alongside connubial bliss the unwelcome fact that they could no longer work together. ‘Married life suits me down to the ground, sir. I find I am now enjoying a more balanced diet, as well as the multiple and varied delights of the bedroom.' Percy allowed a euphoric smile to accompany his dreamy stare into the middle distance.

‘Yes. Yes, I see. Well it's early days yet, isn't it?' Tucker appeared to find the idea of happiness in marriage a difficult concept to handle, which was hardly surprising in view of his own spouse, the formidable battleaxe Peach had christened Brunnhilde Barbara.

‘Not so early, sir. Six months now. And it don't seem a day too long, as dear old Albert Chevalier used to say.'

Tommy Bloody Tucker looked pleasingly vacant; the history of the music hall was not one of his interests. ‘Didn't he sing, “Thank heaven for little girls”? I hope you're not becoming a paedophile, Percy!' The head of CID was overcome by a sudden burst of hilarity at the wit of his suggestion.

Peach produced the sickliest of his vast range of smiles. ‘That was
Maurice
Chevalier, sir. Different sort of cove altogether.'

‘I see. Well, it's always a pleasure to exchange pleasantries with you, Percy, but we must get down to business. I want to run one or two things past you. One or two initiatives which I'm sure you'll welcome.'

He didn't look at all sure, and initiative was not a word Percy associated with Tommy Bloody Tucker. He said with heavy irony, ‘Your overview of the wider crime scene and the society in which we operate gives you a perspective unavailable to the rest of us, sir.'

Irony was as usual wasted on T.B. Tucker. He said earnestly, ‘It is part of my job to keep up standards in the CID section, you know. And I have to say that they seem to me to have been slipping lately.'

‘In what respect, sir? We have kept the overtime budget strictly within the limits you defined for us before Christmas. Our clear-up rates are—'

‘Dress, Peach, dress. Standards of dress are not what they were.'

‘Ah!' At least the bee in the Tucker bonnet seemed relatively harmless this time.

‘I have drafted a directive which I intend to circulate among the CID section. I wanted to run it past you before I issued it. If the Chief Constable approves, we could circulate it among the uniformed staff also. I have noticed a most reprehensible sloppiness among some of our younger officers.' The chief superintendent pushed a typewritten sheet across the desk to his junior.

Percy read the piece diligently and found himself struggling to prevent genuine mirth from bursting unbidden into his shining round face – a sensation he could never recall before in this room. ‘It's – well, it's not quite what I was expecting, sir.'

Tucker took the sheet back and read aloud with some pride: ‘“It has come to my notice that the standards of dress which should be automatic and universally recognized among police personnel are not always being observed. Officers should remember that they represent the service and present a smart appearance at all times, except for those rare occasions when they are operating under cover. In particular, underwear should be of an appropriate colour, so as to be inconspicuous beneath whatever outer wear is adopted.”'

He looked very satisfied with himself. Peach allowed the pause to develop towards the pregnant before he said with exquisite timing, ‘Our girls been flashing their knickers on the main streets of Brunton, have they, sir?'

‘What?' Tucker wore the bewildered goldfish expression which Percy always regarded as a mark of success. He said sternly, ‘I wasn't thinking about women officers, Peach.'

Percy noted the welcome return of his surname. ‘Fifty per cent of our younger officers are female, sir. They will take this as a direct reference to their breeks.'

‘Breeks?'

‘Panties, sir? Perhaps Mrs Tucker prefers that term? Unless of course she favours the thong.' An awesome picture-postcard version of the Wagnerian rear of Brunnhilde Barbara in a thong soared into Peach's vision and refused to be banished.

‘You don't think it a good idea to circulate this?' Tucker's fifty-three-year-old features dissolved into the dismay of a child.

‘I think our younger officers might treat it with derision, sir. The female ones might even react with defiance. They might choose to wear no underwear at all.' The vision of Brunnhilde Barbara disappeared at last with the advent of this vivid and wholly more delightful picture.

‘I am the Head of Brunton CID, Peach, and not a man to be trifled with. They would disobey my directive at their peril.'

‘Indeed, sir. But how would you ensure that it was obeyed? Would you hold regular inspections of underwear? I would of course offer you my personal support and assistance in the implementation of such a policy. But it might be tricky.'