Lessons of the Past (14 page)

“You definitely surprised me. Why are you in such a good mood?” He made his way around his desk and sat.

“I stopped by Lane’s and talked to him. Turns out, he didn’t go see that girl last night. And he wants to be with Courtney.”

He nodded and started tapping on his keyboard. I realized at that point I had completely interrupted his work time. “I’m sorry. I should go—you’re at work.”

“Wait,” he said. “Emily graded your latest assignment. You got an eighty-two.”

“What?” I yelled. “Are you kidding me? Holy shit, I might pass your class!”

Javier chuckled. “I thought you’d like that. Just make sure you keep it up.”

“Yes, sir.” I was seriously happy. I sank down in the chair in front of him as he grinned at me. “This is great news. I need to celebrate.”

“How do you want to celebrate?”

“I don’t know. Maybe we can this weekend?”

“Sure.” He glanced at his phone, then placed it back on the desk. “I really need to get back to work.”

“Yeah. Sorry,” I said, noticing the energy change between us. I couldn’t help the feeling of being brushed off in the same way as the other girl. I grabbed my things and stood while he continued staring at the papers on his desk. “Hope you have a good day. I’ll see you later.”

He didn’t reply, and my good mood melted. He was dismissing me as if he barely knew me. I realized he was at work and had things to do, but he didn’t even say goodbye. He didn’t even look up as I walked away.

What the hell just happened?

My cell phone beeped as I exited the building, and I thought maybe he was going to say something, but it wasn’t him. It was Courtney, and I couldn’t help the small burst of laughter.

Courtney: Holy shit! Lane just asked me out on a real date. A real fucking date!

Reading her text, I forgot about Javier’s odd behavior and grew excited for my friend.

Me: That is awesome! I can’t wait to hear the details!

Instead of putting my phone away, I decided to text Javier. I needed to know why he had dismissed me in that way. We were in a relationship and he needed to talk to me if something was bothering him.

Me: Do you want to explain what happened in your office?

I found a bench and sank down, staring at my phone. He didn’t text me back for several minutes.

Javier: I believe you blew me.

I rolled my eyes at his deflecting.

Me: Don’t be crude. And don’t act stupid. You know exactly what I’m asking about. Which is made that much worse by the fact that I “blew you” just before being kicked out.

I hated to admit it, but his behavior hurt. It made me feel cheap.

Javier: Don’t. I just have a lot on my mind. I’m sorry.

Me: Why don’t you talk to me about it? I know it probably has to do with me anyway.

Javier: Have a good day, Alexandria.

Had he seriously just dismissed me again? Forget hurt—now, I was pissed. I didn’t care that he was at work. Marching back into the math building, my anger grew at a rapid pace.

I knocked on Javier’s open door and walked in. He glanced up, irritated, and I shut the door.

“I just have one thing to say,” I said. “You can go fuck yourself! I will not be dismissed like that again.” Then, I opened the door and left.

It wasn’t until my phone began ringing that I noticed a text I’d gotten a few seconds after his last one.

Javier: I love you.

Damn it.

Courtney and I were lounged out on her bed, a homemade face mask covering her face. I had come over to hear all about her and Lane before my Tuesday evening class.

“I just can’t believe it, you know? I’ve had a teenage crush on him for the last two years,” she said.

“I’m so happy for you. He’s such a great guy.” I brushed red nail polish over my toenail. “I can’t tell you how many times he’s been there for me over the years. I’m so glad he’s finally getting someone great.”

“Aww, you’re too sweet.”

I swiped one last nail and capped the polish. “He told me that he stayed away from you because he didn’t want to make me mad. I guess he was worried I’d feel like a third wheel or something.”

Courtney tried to smile under her hardening mask. “I’m glad you set him straight. He’s…he’s just fucking great. And hot. Oh my gosh, his abs—very lickable.”
You should see my boyfriend’s abs.

I giggled at her dreamy comment and glazed eyes. “I agree, he’s very attractive. It was hard being his best friend in high school. The girls threw themselves at him and hated me.”

“Don’t tell me. I don’t wanna know. But I bet it had to be the same for him. Having a beautiful girl with sexy curves as a best friend.”

I ignored her comment. I hated talking about my looks. “Oh, change of subject,” I said. “My sister called today and she is driving up next weekend. The four of us will have to do something fun.” I paused. “Unless you and Lane want some alone time. I’d totally understand if you do.”

Courtney got up and walked to the bathroom. “I think we can manage to spend some time with you and Rebecca. We aren’t rabbits.”

“I don’t know, from what you told me, y’all were awful busy this morning,” I called out, laughing.

The water began running and I heard a muffled, “Shut up.”

I laughed and checked the time. It was time for me to get to my class. I gathered up my stuff as she entered the room, and said, “I have to go, but I’m so freakin’ happy for you.”

“Thanks. It’s still a little surreal.”

I laughed and kissed her cheek on my way out. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

“Oh, hey, how’s it going with the guy from your class?”

I stopped. “Huh?” I asked, lost. Then I remembered my lie. “Oh, him, it’s going. Nothing new.”

Narrowing her eyes, Courtney asked, “And you’re okay with that?”

“Yeah. I’m not really in a place to take it any further.” It technically wasn’t a lie. Javier and I couldn’t take our relationship to another level for a couple reasons.

“As long as you are happy.”

“I am,” I assured her. “I promise.”

“Okay.”

“Bye, Court. Love you.”

***

After my last class, I settled on my couch with a glass of wine and reruns of
Friends
. It had been a great day as far as seeing my two best friends happy, but an irritating day as far as my own love life. My anger for Javier had dissipated, but hadn’t fully gone away. How dare he treat me like that? You can’t rudely dismiss someone in person
and
text, then follow it up with “I love you” and expect everything to be peachy.

The lock of my door rattled before Javier walked in. He slammed the door and tossed his keys on the coffee table. His face was pure anger. “I can go fuck myself?”

Muting the TV, I took a sip of wine, then replied, “Yes. I believe that’s what I said.”

Javier rolled his eyes and stalked to the kitchen. He retrieved a glass and poured himself some wine. “You do realize you are acting like an immature bitch, right? Some of us have adult responsibilities.”

What the hell?
“Is that so? I had no idea. Why don’t you enjoy that wine then get back to your adult responsibilities at your own home.”

He emptied the wine. “Don’t,” he warned, but I didn’t care.

“I’m going to take a shower. When I get out, I expect you to be gone. I’m not putting up with your shit tonight. You don’t get to treat me however you want then expect me to forgive you by telling me you love me.”

“At least I fucking say it!”

I narrowed my eyes, but couldn’t think of anything to say. He was being a complete asshole, but he did have a point. I hadn’t told him I loved him. I couldn’t though, I had to guard my heart. In one swift second, he strode toward me and slammed his lips on mine. I could almost taste his anger.

Javier pulled back, his hands on my cheeks. “I’m sorry, okay? Yes, I was an ass to you today. It’s just hard to be sitting there with the girl who just gave me a mind-blowing orgasm, who also happens to be my student, and get a text from my boss.” He leaned his forehead against mine. “What we are doing has a lot of risks. If we get caught, you could be kicked out of SUBC, I could be fired. I can’t do that to Caroline.”

“Javier…what did the text say?” My mind began to race at the possibilities. I hadn’t just worked my ass off for the last three years to be kicked out of school. “Does he know about us?”

“No. It was about a stupid meeting. But it was enough to make me realize how risky this is.” He kissed me again. “But I can’t stay away from you either. God, from the moment I laid eyes on you, I wanted you. And now, I love you.”

My anger melted with his words, along with my fear. It was easy to forget our relationship was against the rules when he so easily consumed me. “I’m sorry.”

“How about instead of fucking myself, I fuck you?” Javier whispered, kissing down my face, and finally in the sensitive spot below my ear.

“Mmm, that sounds…okay.”

He flicked my nipple through my thin shirt. “Okay? I may just have to spank you for that.”

I bit my lip in reply. I actually liked the sound of that. His eyebrow arched and he placed a hard kiss to my lips. He tore my shirt over my head and placed one more kiss on my lips before shoving my shorts and panties down my legs. Then, he tossed me on the couch, my chest landing on the armrest.

Javier stepped in front of me, his face a mix of love and lust. Slowly, he undid his jeans and shoved them down. His hard cock was visible through his boxer briefs. I reached out and stroked him. “Baby…” he moaned, then pushed his underwear down, exposing his large, hard dick. I licked my lips at the sight of him. “Open that sexy mouth.” I complied and he plunged his cock down my throat.

Immediately, I wrapped my lips around him and sucked. I could taste his arousal, which added to my own. My breasts became full, my nipples perked, and a deep need rested in my sex. “Fuck, baby, that’s it. Suck my cock.”

Javier pushed harder, teaching me a lesson, and I couldn’t get enough. I wanted him in all ways, wanted to feel his skin against mine. Reaching behind him, I grabbed his ass. It was perfectly contoured and silky smooth. I racked my fingernails down his ass, then kneaded each cheek as he continued to pump inside my mouth.

I let my hands roam over his backside, and with one final thrust, he came down my throat. “You suck so good,” Javier breathed and pulled out.

He moved behind me and cracked his hand against my ass. “Oh…” I cried out.

“You like that, baby?” he asked as he repeated the act. Before I could reply, his hand came around my front, flicking my clit. “I’m going to fuck that bitchiness out of you, but first, I’m going to make you feel really good.” Then, he pushed me down further against the armrest and his tongue was on my nub.

“Yes,” I cried. “Yes, baby.”

His tongue was relentless, working me into a frenzy. He licked, sucked, and bit, fucking me with that tongue. One hand reached up and pinched my nipple, and I cried out, my body quivering. My orgasm rocked through my body, but he didn’t stop. He kept milking my clit until I finally collapsed into a heap over the cushion.

He reached around, letting his fingers run over my cleft. “I can’t touch you enough. It’ll never be enough,” he rasped, slamming into me from behind. With his free hand, he grabbed my hair and pulled back.

Javier’s fingers traveled up to my chest and back down, touching just enough to set my body ablaze.

His fingers moved to my already sensitive clit, and I whispered, “No,” but it was half-hearted. My nub felt raw, but with his touch, I craved more. His other hand was rolling my nipple between his finger, his dick slamming into me at a relentless pace, and his mouth was on my neck. He was everywhere, possessing me inside and out.

“Baby,” I shouted, my vision blurring as I came. I closed my eyes, letting the sensation consume me—letting him consume me.

In the back of my consciousness, I could feel Javier pick up his pace, his lips moving over my shoulder, nipping occasionally. I had no idea how it was possible, but when both his hands covered my breasts and pulled my nipples, I came again and he followed.

“See what you do to me?” he questioned, panting.

I nodded, but didn’t say anything. I didn’t have the energy.

He pulled out. “I need a shower. Join me?”

I grabbed his proffered hand and he helped me stand. Once in the bathroom, he turned the water on and kissed my forehead. The water heated and he helped me inside before joining me, wrapping his arms around me.

His eyes shined as he we gazed at each other, and I knew mine were doing the same. I hadn’t told him, but I loved him with all my heart. In that moment, I knew I’d do anything for this man.

“Javier?”

He placed a kiss on my lips. “Yeah?”

“I’m sorry for…”

“Being a bitch?” He chuckled. “I’m sorry for being an ass. I just got that text and you were there…”

I rubbed his cheek. “It’s okay. I understand.”

He grabbed the shampoo and we washed each other’s hair in silence. I had no idea why, but it felt like we had reached a turning point. Like we had actually fucked all of our doubts and anger out on my couch.

After rinsing the shampoo, he conditioned my hair and then grabbed my sponge. His movements were slow, worshipping my body with each caress. His lips touched each place his hands had traveled, and I closed my eyes, soaking in the sensation.

“God, I can’t wait to spend the weekend with you. Loving you like this.”

I smiled. “Me neither.”

“And I really want to make love to you.”

“Again?” I questioned.

He nodded. “I need to be inside of you. Feel you again.”

How could I say no to that?

After a long week, Friday finally came around and I couldn’t help the butterflies swirling in my stomach. I was very excited to spend the entire weekend with Javier, but more than anything, I was nervous. I was spending two days in a house he shared with someone else.

I packed a few sexy bras and panties, and comfy clothes. I didn’t figure I’d need anything else besides a toothbrush and face wash. With that, I zipped up my overnight bag, tossed it over my shoulder, and grabbed my purse.