Let Go (16 page)

Continuous
pounding through his head as if a jack hammer is inside, wakes
Greylan. He squints at the uncovered windows and curses himself for
not buying any blinds yet. He rolls over to warmth instead of cool
crisp sheets as he was expecting. Alarm rings through his fuzzy
thoughts. ‘Shit, did I bring someone home with me last night?’ A
small arm drapes over his chest causing him to jump up. He glances
over to Christina who has one eye open with amusement across her
face at his reaction. His body loosens for a moment at the
realization that it’s only Christina and not some random chick he
brought home with him.

“Relax Grey,
nothing happened. I’m guessing you don’t remember anything, do
you?”

He shakes his
head and tries to recall the events from the night before. He
remembers leaving Juno’s and driving to Mark’s Bar down the road.
The last thing that floats through his thoughts are the shots
lining the bar in salute to his fight. Shit, his fight.

He pops off
the bed, the movement causing him to wince with pain as his head
continuously pounds, “Fuck, what time is it? Jax is gonna kill
me.”

Christina
rolls over spreading her arms out wide across the bed, “No worries
Grey, he won’t kill you today, it’s your big fight. I’m sure it
means as much to him as it does to you. By the way, I think I like
this bed.”

Greylan looks
over with a smirk on his face, “Does Jonathan know you slept
over?”

“Nothing
happened Grey.” She pushes the blanket down from her body, “See
fully clothed. You on the other hand, you wanted to strip for me,
luckily you passed out before you made it to your underwear.”

Greylan looks
down at his almost naked figure and back up to Christina.

“Don’t get me
wrong, I’m definitely not complaining Grey, you are very nice on
the eyes. Just not my type, I like a little exotic in my diet.”

“That’s not
what you said before.”

“Um, I was
experimenting before I got the real thing.”

He shakes his
head and heads for the shower. Christina calls out behind him, “By
the way, I think the alcohol helped, you didn’t have any
nightmares, did you?” He turns back to face her, confusion with an
unasked question in his expression.

“You didn’t
forget I’ve had sleep overs with you before, did you?”

“No, I…”

“Grey, we all
have things that haunt us, it’s how we deal with them that makes
them bearable. You have to find what works for you and I’m not
recommending alcohol, you are a shitty drunk.”

She adds, “See
you tonight at the fight. Juno got both of our shifts covered.”

He nods before
continuing to the bathroom and closing the door. As he steps into
the pounding water, he tries to relax and clear his mind. But his
demons pop up. Meyer’s easy going attitude from last night as if
time hasn’t passed. Years with no contact and he shows up ready to
pick up where they left off. He shakes his head trying to lose the
anger that is surfacing. Anger at Meyer for showing back up in his
life and bringing Mollie who he can’t seem to stop thinking about,
hammer through his head, probably more than the remnants of any
hangover.

His phone
starts ringing relentlessly as he steps out of the shower. Two
rounds echo through the apartment before he decides to answer it. A
number he doesn’t recognize flashes across the screen.

“Hello?”

“Hey Grey,
It’s Jimmy T.”

He should have
known Jimmy would be all over it soon. This is his last fight
before going pro, the same exact situation as that day more than
five years ago.

“Hey Jimmy,
How’s it going?”

“Great buddy,
I heard you’re on the up and up. Looking for a manager yet?”

Guilt embeds
itself into his chest for a moment for leaving Jimmy in a lurch but
Jackson’s words repeat through his mind, “Jimmy rode on your
coattails even after you left.”

“Ah, not sure
Jimmy. So far I haven’t needed one. Jackson’s done a great job
getting me fights.”

“Yeah, but
Jackson doesn’t have the connections I do Grey. Think about it and
let me know. I’ll do you right, I promise.”

“No doubt,
Jimmy, I’ll think on it. Are you coming to the fight tonight?”

Jimmy seems to
hesitate before answering, “Um, I’ll try to make it buddy, been
real busy around here.” He rushes to get off the phone, “Gotta go.
Think on the offer Greylan, I’ll get you some big fights if you
give it a chance.”

The phone goes
dead before Greylan has a chance to say anything else. Jimmy’s
behavior isn’t completely out of the ordinary for him, just a
little more strange than usual. But Greylan doesn’t have a chance
to dwell on it before his phone starts going off again. He glances
at the screen and he’s greeted with his sister’s smiling face.

“Hey, Kid, how
are you?”

He can hear
the smile in her voice, “Hi Grey. When were you going to tell me
about your fight tonight?”

And already
any kind of good mood he was in is squashed. It’s not surprising
that Parker is keeping up with his fighting but it still pisses him
off.

He spits out,
“I knew your boy would tell you.”

“Greylan Pace,
we are family and a phone call from you every once in a while would
be nice. Didn’t you promise mom…” She had to pull the guilt
card.

“Shit Trin,
sorry, I’ve just been busy.”

“Greylan, I
know how you feel about Parker. It’s obvious. We’ve had this
conversation though. He is the person who I’ve chosen. Please don’t
alienate me just because you don’t like him.”

Her words hit
him right where it counts. The guilt over his sister is continuous.
So he relents once again, “I know Trin, like I said before, I’ll
try.”

“No Grey,
trying isn’t good enough anymore, you’re
not
trying. Just
call me once in a while and I’ll be happy with that.”

“I will
Trinity.” At this point he’ll do whatever she asks. Disappointing
his sister isn’t something he ever wants to do again.

She finishes,
“I’ll see you tonight then.”

“See you
tonight.”

He ends the
call and feels miserable, first hammered from Jimmy and now
Trinity. Hopefully the day will shape up. He must win the fight
tonight to move on. He tells himself to focus on only that one
thought but a pretty red head pops into his thoughts and anger
propels him out the door ready to hit something.

The gym is
quiet when Greylan walks in just after noon. Jackson is missing
from his usual perch. Greylan walks through aware that various
stares are diverted his way as he passes. He meets the threshold of
the office and a smooth smile on Jackson’s face. He asks, “You
ready for tonight?”

Reluctantly,
Greylan tries to meet his enthusiasm and answers, “Yeah, guess
so.”

“Don’t guess
boy, be sure. That guy in the cage tonight isn’t gonna guess he’ll
be ready to beat your ass, he’s gonna know.”

“Okay Jax, I
just need to get a couple of hours in with the bag.”

Jackson stands
up and pulls Greylan over in a loose headlock. He states close to
Greylan’s cheek, “Whatever you have to do. Clear that head, get rid
of it all. Tonight is your only shot.”

Greylan nods
in his arm before Jackson loosens it allowing Greylan to pull away.
This is exactly why he came here today, to clear his head.

He leaves
Jackson behind in the office without another word and heads
straight for the punching bags. His feet maneuver on their own, in
a dance with an imaginary opponent. He pushes it all away
concentrating only on hitting the bag and kicking it
systematically. But as has happened half a dozen times since the
night before, the beautiful woman accompanying Meyer last night
flashes through his vision. He wonders what her story is. Why she
looks so haunted. Her eyes that he felt could see every demon he
harbors with just one glance. She was so beautiful it was hard for
him to draw his eyes away. He hits and kicks harder repeating over
and over to himself that she’s off limits, she’s Meyer’s girl.

A couple of
hours later Jackson kicks him out. He still has pent up energy but
Jackson tells him to save the rest for tonight. Greylan considers
going home to take a nap but he knows he would never be able to
turn his head off. He heads for Mill Pond Park. As he turns into
the drive memories flood his mind. He and Meyer on their bikes with
fishing poles and buckets of bait balanced precariously so they
didn’t crash. In middle school the park was just starting to
expand. Back then the pond was the draw so it was mostly deserted.
Now as he makes the short drive down the lane he notices the
playgrounds that have been put in and billboards advertising
concerts in the park. As Greylan gets out of the truck he looks
around noting how much the park really has changed. A boat launch
is now present a few yards down the pond.

Back with
Meyer, when they were only so high, they thought the pond was huge.
Now through different eyes, the size of it hits him as small, like
his life that keeps stepping back over the past. He shakes it away
momentarily again cursing himself for the torture he is forcing on
himself. He walks along the edge of the lake to a makeshift
waterfall. A wooden wall disappears into the murky water below. He
sinks to the edge, dangling his legs over the side trying to let
the sound of the pouring water drown out his thoughts that are
screaming at him.

A short while
later a smooth voice that he recognizes all too well overpowers the
sound of the water. He turns as she approaches. She steps forward,
her hands on her hips staring at him for a full minute. When he
doesn’t say anything she gestures to the spot beside him. She is
dressed in jeans that disappear into high brown boots. Her black
short sleeved shirt contrasts with her milky white skin dotted with
freckles. As she lowers to the edge of the wall next to him, he has
to remind himself to breathe. Her bright red hair is pulled back at
the nape of her neck. Her lips turn up as her steady voice
explains, “Meyer thought you might be here.”

Her smile
knocks the breath out of him. He looks forward, frowning, trying to
focus on the constant patter of the water to gather his thoughts.
What exactly does this chick know about him and why would she
bother searching him out if she’s here with Meyer? And if she sits
there any longer he doesn’t know if he’ll be able to keep his hands
off of her. Fuck, why is he thinking these things? He doesn’t even
know her. The breeze blows forcing a sweet scent to caress his nose
and he thinks he might die right here. His hands clench at his
sides and for once he focuses on his anger. It’s something he can
act on. His blood pumps faster as he thinks about Meyer sitting so
easily with his arm around her last night. As if he doesn’t have a
care in the world.

She looks to
the water and admits, “Last night when we came to the bar, you
weren’t what I was expecting.” Her musical voice brings him out of
his thoughts. The anger seems to float away as she speaks. He wants
to reach out and grab it.

Greylan turns
to her unsure of her meaning, his expression blank. He doesn’t
trust his voice to question her though. He looks back to the water
wanting her to leave and stay all at the same time.

She continues,
“I’m so sorry about…what happened. I’ve felt terrible about it all
of this time. And Meyer feels awful. He believes he is wholly
responsible. I thought you’d be hard and angry from being there for
so long. The way Meyer described you before, as thoughtful and
putting others before yourself, I didn’t think you’d still be like
that.” She seems to hesitate and adds softly, “I’ve known people,
um, I just know you change when you go away like that.”

He looks back
to her, meeting those incredible eyes. They seem stormy today, not
quite as clear as last night. But he can still see flecks of gold
and all he wants to do is lean into them and get lost. He feels as
if she can see every thought going through his mind, which at this
point he can’t keep one clear idea. He looks away afraid she can
see more than he wants her to. He reminds himself that she is here
with Meyer who hasn’t been around in years. There must be an
ulterior motive behind all of this. He concentrates on that thought
willing his anger to rise again. Any other feeling except this
reaction to her that he doesn’t want, is too foreign and against
the rules.

He sighs,
“Apparently you know all about me, what about you? Why are you here
looking for me?”

She takes a
deep breath as if readying herself. This causes Greylan to glance
over at her again. His eyes narrow in a glare trying like hell to
keep his guard up.

“Like I said,
last night I was pleasantly surprised. You aren’t what I
expected.”

He frowns at
her vagueness and realizes that this is the last thing he needs at
this moment. Her being here will only mess with his head even more.
He stands abruptly not commenting on her statement. Instead he
looks down at her and almost falters in his words.
God, is she
gorgeous.
But he takes a small breath and explains quietly, “I
have a big fight tonight. I need to go and get ready.”

She nods and
follows him with her gaze all the way to his truck. He can feel her
stare on his back where he feels warmer than any other place on his
body. His tells himself that he needs to stay away from her but his
body tells him other things. He has never been so turned on by just
a look from a woman before. As he climbs into the truck he glances
back and meets her still stare. She smiles and waves. He nods,
closing the door, silently yelling at himself not to look at her
tonight. It will totally screw with his game.