Letting Go (Vista Falls #3) (2 page)

“I don’t know.” That was the problem. He still didn’t know if he had it in him to be the man Gabby needed, but for the very first time, he was willing to at least try. He just wasn’t sure if that would be enough for her.

“You don’t know?” She rested her head in her upturned palm as she looked at him sideways. “So you come back into my life, destroy the first real relationship I’ve had in a long time, and for what? Because you want to sleep with me again?” She stood, looking angry as she pointed up at one of the cabins. “Rush said you were staying here tonight. In the same cabin we had last time?”

Before he could grab her, she’d kicked off her high heels and started trudging back up the hill. She looked amazing in a black strapless dress that dipped low in the back, showing off her ridiculous curves, but Colt tried not to focus on her body as he struggled to figure out what she was planning.

“Gabby, be careful. It’s dark. Where the hell are you going?” She’d veered off in the opposite direction of the inn, toward the cabins, as he jogged to catch up with her. “Stop! Talk to me. Where are you—”

She reached into his pants pocket. “Where’s the key?”

His body reacted immediately, as though she’d been making a grab for him instead of the key. “Why do you want that?”

“You said you want me, right? Well, this is your chance.” She extracted the key and walked to the same cabin where they’d made love less than a year ago.

A part of him wanted to take her, no questions asked, but his brain knew she was only offering because she was hurt and angry and thought having sex with him again would somehow prove that she was over him.

“We’re not doing this tonight,” he said, reaching for her hand when she stuck the key in the lock.

“What’s wrong? You don’t want me?” She reached around to unzip her dress, and his eyes widened when it fell away, revealing only black lace panties.

“Are you crazy?” He stepped behind her to shield her from anyone who might be walking along the path while his arms curled around her to unlock the door. “Get inside.”

She tossed her heels on the wood floor in the small foyer before stepping inside… and out of her dress. She turned to face him. “You said you want me.” She spread her arms. “So take me.”

He closed his eyes, fighting the desire to do just that. “I do want you, but not like this. Not when you’re hurt and angry and questioning whether you can trust me.”

“I can’t trust you!”

He knew he had that coming, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. “I know it may seem that way, but I told you, I’m here to stay this time.” A flash of pain crossed her face, and it killed him to know he was the cause.

“You were the first guy I loved,” she said, her voice quiet and slightly shaky as she fixated on his chest. “The first one I slept with. And you didn’t even have the decency to have a real conversation with me before you left town when we were kids. You wrote me a letter.” Her eyes finally met his, and her light green eyes were bright with rage. “A goddamn letter! You didn’t think I deserved to hear all that from you?”

“I did, but…” Remembering how to speak when she was standing in front of him nearly naked was proving to be one of the hardest things he’d ever had to do. “Fine, you want the truth?” He raked a trembling hand through his hair. If there’d ever been a time for full disclosure, this was it. “I knew if I saw you one more time, I wouldn’t be able to leave. That’s why I wrote the letter instead of telling you face-to-face.” He leaned over to pick up her dress before thrusting it into her hands. “Now will you please put this on?”

“And staying would have been so terrible?” she asked, gripping the dress.

“For me it would have.” He had no way to make her understand what he’d been going through back then, but he had to try. “For me, you and Wes were the only good things about Vista Falls. Since he was leaving—”

“And I wasn’t reason enough to stay?” She shook her head. “You sure know how to make a girl feel special, Colt.”

He stepped closer, knowing that was a bad idea. His body reacted immediately, thinking
it
was getting in on the action. “You were special,” he said, wiping a trace of mascara from below her eye. “You know that. I’d never felt about anyone the way I did about you.”
Before or since.
“But I always associated this town with my old man, and that meant I’d never be able to find happiness here.”

“Then why come back?”

Her question was legitimate but not an easy one for him to answer. “I guess I got tired of running away. It made me feel like a coward, and that’s what he always accused me of being. I couldn’t let him be right.”

“I don’t know why you always believed that shit he told you,” she said, sounding disgusted. “Everyone knew he was a whack job.”

He chuckled at her apt description of his father, but it didn’t make his old taunts hurt any less. “When you’re a kid, you believe what your parents tell you. You don’t know any better. So when he told me I was a worthless piece of shit, I believed him. I figured, why would my own father lie to me, right?”

She stepped closer, her bare breasts brushing his white dress shirt. “He didn’t know you. He may have lived in the same house, eaten at the same table, but he didn’t know what was in here”—she touched his chest, where his heart beat—“or what was in here.” She tapped her index finger against his temple.

He could barely breathe when she touched him… even when the touch was intended to be an innocent, gentle reminder that he was more than the names that plagued him.

“You were brilliant, Colt.” She smiled. “I’m not surprised you got all those scholarship offers. What school wouldn’t want you?”

“Yeah, but according to my old man, I screwed that up too, dropping out after my first year to start Backwoods Outdoors with Wes.”

She threw her head back laughing, and he curled his hand into a fist to resist the urge to grab her and kiss the smooth, sweetly scented column of her neck.

“Your dad called you a failure?” Her lips twitched, and her eyes sparkled with amusement. “That’s rich. You’ve built one of the most successful companies in your sector. What’s he done with his life? Aside from bullying everyone who crosses his path?”

His father was living in a nice assisted living facility outside of town, which Colt foot the bill for since the man had never held a job long enough to draw a decent pension.

“Put some clothes on,” he whispered, closing his eyes before they could dip lower. “Please. I can’t have this conversation with you… like that.” His eyes were still closed, but he heard rustling and the sound of a zipper.

“The Colt I remember would have taken me any way he could get me. What happened to that guy?”

He opened his eyes in time to see her pulling pins from her hair and shaking the long, wavy blond strands until they spilled around her shoulders.

“That guy grew up.” He cleared his throat. “I don’t expect you to believe me. Lord knows you haven’t seen any evidence of it yet. But you will.” Last time he’d been alone with her in this cabin, he had taken advantage of her feelings for him, and he’d spent every day since hating himself for that.

“I can’t take another chance on you.” Her eyes were downcast as she bit her lip. “The first time you left, I was heartbroken. But I was just a kid then. I told myself that first loves aren’t meant to last forever. But when you came back the last time and we…” She shook her head. “I’m not going to lie, that’s been harder to get over.”

He curled his hands around her bare shoulders, knowing immediately that touching her was a mistake. “Look at me.” She did as he asked, but he could tell it cost her. “I’m not over it either. I thought about you every day after I left.”

“Then why didn’t you call, text, email… something?”

He should have, but opening the lines of communication would have meant opening his heart to her, and he hadn’t been ready to do that. Until he’d realized that keeping his distance hurt even more. “I didn’t know what to say. I knew any apology I offered would sound hollow, and honestly, I believed you deserved more than that. You deserved to have me standing in front of you like I am now, promising you that I can be a better man.”

She inhaled deeply before releasing a slow, shaky breath. “I’d be crazy to believe anything you have to say. You know that, don’t you?”

“I do.” But that didn’t mean he wasn’t holding out hope she’d at least give him a chance to prove himself. “But think about the alternative—we both spend the rest of our lives wondering if maybe, just maybe, we could have been great together.”

“You don’t think I’ve wasted enough time thinking about that?” She stepped back and bent to pick up her discarded shoes. “I spent the better part of my marriage wondering that.”

He was shocked to learn he’d crossed her mind while she was married. The Gabby he knew had been faithful to a fault, giving him all of herself even when he didn’t deserve it. “You did?”

She shook her head, looking frustrated as she pushed past him. “You really are clueless, Atkins.”

Gabby returned to the inn’s dining room, where they’d held the wedding reception because of the threat of rain, only to find her best friend having a heated discussion with her new husband. She didn’t want to intrude, but she couldn’t help being concerned. Sage had waited years to marry the love of her life. What could they possibly have to argue about on their wedding night?

“Hey, you guys,” she said, approaching. “Everything okay?”

“There you are!” Sage hugged her with a sigh of relief. “Where were you? I was worried sick after Dave told me what happened.”

Gabby looked around. There were half as many guests as there had been when she left, and Dave was nowhere to be seen. “Speaking of Dave, where is he?”

“He left,” Sage said, curling her hand around Gabby’s wrist. “He said since you have a room here tonight, there was no reason for him to stick around.”

She felt guilty that Dave had probably witnessed her leading Colt outside. “I’m sorry if that caused problems for you. I’ll try to talk to him tomorrow and apologize for the way things went down tonight.” She knew Dave wasn’t the type to hold a grudge, but since they lived in the same small town, she didn’t want things to be awkward the next time their paths crossed. “But what’s going on with you two?” Gabby gestured between the bride and groom. “Looks like you were pretty upset about something.”

“I am upset!” Sage said, sounding almost hysterical. “I was just telling Wes that Colt can’t just waltz back into your life and turn it upside down again! He doesn’t get to do that!”

Gabby hugged her friend, touched that Sage would waste time being concerned about her problems on the most important day of
her
life. She knew if Sage found out about her little rage-fueled striptease, she’d never believe Gabby was done with Colt though.

“He’s not going to do that,” Gabby assured her, smiling. “I was just telling him that, so you can relax.”

Sage sank against her husband when Wes put his arm around her, kissing the top of her head. “See, babe, I told you there was nothing to worry about. Gabby can take care of herself.”

Sage looked over Gabby’s shoulder, her eyes narrowing as she beckoned someone closer with her index finger.

Uh oh.
The look on Sage’s face meant it could only be one person. Colt.

“Hey, guys,” Colt said, straightening his silver tie when he stood beside Gabby. “What’s up?”

“You know I love you, right?” Sage asked Colt. “You’re like a brother to Wes, which means I consider you family too.”

Colt frowned, looking at Wes for some explanation. “Uh, yeah, sure. But why—”

“This”—she gestured between Colt and Gabby—“is not going to happen, so you can just forget about it.”

Colt looked more amused than concerned by Sage’s warning as he slipped a hand into the pocket of his black dress pants and rocked back on his heels. “Is that right? And you get to decide this?”

“Yes! Well, no, but…” Sage glared at Colt, poking a finger in Colt’s chest. “I won’t let you hurt her again. I don’t care what you say, you’re not going to get another chance to break her heart.”

Colt inclined his head toward his best friend. “You gave this guy another chance. And I know for a fact he’ll never make you sorry you did.”

“That’s different,” Sage said, crossing her arms. “Wes didn’t bail on me twice.” She held up two fingers to emphasize her point. “Without a word of explanation.”

“I’ve apologized to Gabby for that,” Colt said, slipping an arm around Gabby’s waist. “And I’ve tried to explain, but I don’t expect either one of you to take anything I say at face value. I know I’ll have to prove myself to you.” He smirked. “To both of you, apparently.”

Gabby stepped just out of his reach to make a point. He didn’t get to touch her as though he had the right, sending a clear message to every other man in the room that they were a couple or something.

“Gabby’s not the only one you bailed on the last time,” Sage said, hooking her thumb at her husband. “You bailed on Wes too. You just woke up one morning and decided that you were leaving even though you two had agreed you were going to move the business back here and work at it together.”

“I’ve apologized to Wes for the way that went down,” Colt said, sounding remarkably patient. “And I’ve told him it won’t happen again.”

“Why should he believe you?” Sage demanded.

Gabby looked up in time to see Colt’s eyes darken with annoyance, and she knew the gloves were about to come off. He was done playing nice.

“Because he, of all people, knows that I’d never let him down.” He looked Wes in the eye, still speaking to Sage when he said, “I’ve always had his back, and I always will. Our friendship comes before business for me. Always.”

When Sage would have responded, Colt walked away, heading for the bar.

“Honey,” Wes said to Sage, “I know you’re worried about Gabby, but you had no right to go off on him like that. Prior to this past year, I spent the past fifteen working side by side with Colt, and I know better than anyone that when he commits to something, like our business, he’s all in.”