Like Lightning (9 page)

Maddie nodded. “A bit overwhelmed. That was…”

“Incredible?”

She looked deeply into his eyes as soft light glimmered into the cab. “More than that, Trey. It was much more than incredible.”

Trey's breathing began to slow and his brain finally kicked into gear. A slow uneasy tremor coursed through his body.

He'd given in to his desire.

He'd made love to Maddie.

Now, she cast him a look filled with hope and expectation.

The two things Trey didn't have to offer.

 

Maddie sat in the passenger side of the truck in front of the ranch house, watching Trey shut down the engine. After they'd made love, they'd dressed quickly, quietly and rode home in silence, Trey's expression growing dimmer each second.

Maddie's emotions had been on a rollercoaster ride for much of the evening. First the fright with Storm, being tossed off the stallion and left alone in bad weather and then experiencing great relief at having Trey rescue her. Confined in the truck and filled with
strong desire, they'd made love. For Maddie, there weren't sufficient words to describe making love to Trey—a dream come true, her fantasy in the flesh. She'd ridden a high she'd never known, discovered sensations she never knew existed and now this—Trey's silent withdrawal, his distant body language.

“Trey?” she asked finally. He hadn't made a move to get out of the truck. He just sat there, running a hand down his face, seeming to do battle with something going on in his head. “I need to know where we go from here?”

Trey turned to face her, a look of deep regret and anguish crossing his features. The look alone frightened her and she almost couldn't bear to hear what he had to say. But Maddie had never been a wilting willow—she fought her battles head on.

“That's just it, honey. There's nowhere to go from here.”

Stunned, Maddie sat there silently for a moment, letting his words sink in. He couldn't possibly mean that it was over before it began. He couldn't possibly mean that tonight meant nothing to him. Nothing but…sex. Maddie tried not to spit the words out bitterly, “So that's it? A one-night stand?”

“No,” he said adamantly. “You could never be a one-night stand.”

“Then, what are you saying?” Maddie fought tears, barely keeping her emotions in check and waiting patiently for Trey's explanation.

Trey sighed deeply and peered out the truck's windshield. “I never meant for any of this to happen, Maddie. I tried keeping to our business agreement. Things got out of control.”

Maddie held her chin high. “We made love and it was wonderful, Trey. But apparently, it didn't mean anything to you.”

“It meant something to me,” he rushed out. “That much is more than true.”

“Just great sex?”

“The best sex of my life, Maddie. I won't deny that. But it was more.”

Maddie closed her eyes. She believed him and should have been elated at Trey's admission but instead she experienced great anguish. She knew a brush-off when she encountered one. She feared what was coming, but didn't understand why.

He scrubbed his jaw and took a deep breath. “I don't want to hurt you.”

“Then don't.”

He cast her a solemn look. “I'm trying not to, Maddie. I'm trying damn hard to protect you.”

“Protect me? From who? From…you?”

“Well, yeah.”

Trey paused and Maddie waited.

“I'm no good with commitment,” he said finally. “I've failed too many times in the past. I have a bad track record with women. And the trait goes back generations. It's like a curse.”

“Trey, I don't recall asking you for a commitment.”

Trey shook his head fiercely. “No way, Maddie. I may not know a whole lot about women, but I do know one thing. You are definitely not a one-night, one-week or one-month stand. You're a keeper. You're the kind of woman that settles a man. I wish I was the settling kind, but I know I'm not. I don't commit. I tried that once. Did you know I was once engaged?”

Maddie shook her head. She whispered, “No.”

His lips curled up in a self-deprecating smile. “Yeah. I left my fiancée just before the wedding. I ran off like a stupid fool and hurt her real bad. Left her to make all the explanations, left her to deal with a broken heart. It really tore her up. I knew then that my fate was sealed. I'm just like my father and his father before him. They took what they wanted with no regard for the women who would get hurt. My father wasn't a bad man. He just didn't come to recognize his faults, until it was too late—five wives too late. The days of Will Walker are long gone. My great-great-grandfather was loyal. He had clarity. He knew what he wanted and went after it. He toughed it out and didn't give up. He had what I lack, Maddie.
Staying power.
”

Maddie's heart ached, yet she found herself wanting to know more. Maybe it was the healer in her, or maybe it was just morbid curiosity, but she wanted to learn about Trey's one-time engagement. “How long ago were you engaged?”

“I was twenty-one. Ten years ago, give or take.”

“You were young, Trey. You weren't ready.”

She thought about her good friend, Caroline, and what she'd been through because of a man who hadn't been ready. He'd abandoned his wife and child, yet Maddie had a hard time comparing the two men. Trey was too good a man to abandon his family, but it was clear that he believed he would, and right now, that's all that mattered—what Trey believed about himself.

“I was ready enough to ask her to marry me. I was ready enough to set a wedding date. I was ready enough to make plans for a future. Only thing I wasn't ready for was following through on my promises. Like I said, no staying power.”

“And you think you'll break my heart?”

Trey closed his eyes briefly, letting go a long sigh then he stared deeply into her eyes. “Yeah, I'll break your heart.”

She threw caution and all good sense to the wind. Her pride flew out as well. “Maybe I'm willing to take that chance.”

Trey shook his head. “I can't let you do that. You deserve better than me. You deserve someone who has everything to offer you. Someone steady.”

“Like Nick Spencer?” Maddie didn't know exactly why she'd brought Nick's name up, but she had and now she wanted to see Trey's reaction. She and Nick were friends, period. But somehow she doubted Trey believed that and a small part of her had rejoiced when she'd thought he'd been jealous of Nick.

Trey became quiet and long moments ticked by. Then he finally nodded, “Yeah, if he makes you happy.”

Maddie wanted to scream. Trey was the one who made her happy. He's the one she'd wanted since the day she stepped foot in Hope Wells. He's the one who had just made earth-shattering, mind-blowing, heart-stopping love to her.

She decided to lay it all on the line, to let him know the truth about Nick's proposal. If Trey cared for her at all, she'd find out right now. “Nick's part of a new clinic being developed in Denver and he wants me to work alongside him there. The clinic will have all the latest state-of-the-art equipment and we'd be on the ground floor of many new techniques in veterinary medicine. It would mean leaving my practice. It would mean saying goodbye to Hope Wells for good.”

Trey's expression faltered for a moment, and she
witnessed deep regret in his eyes. He spoke so quietly that Maddie had a hard time hearing him. “Maybe you should go.”

A sharp slap in the face couldn't have stung more. Tonight, they'd shared something powerful, something special, something
beautiful.
They'd made love like there was no tomorrow, like their lives depended on it. And now, Trey had dismissed her. Easily. Without much debate or thought. He'd simply decided what was best for her. He wouldn't even give them a chance. He didn't care enough to try.

The pain went deep. Tears flowed then, a few drops that she couldn't hold back any longer. She reached for the door handle and turned away from Trey. “Yeah, maybe I should.”

Maddie pulled the door open and when her feet hit the ground, she strode quickly to the house. Once inside her bedroom, angry, bitter tears spilled out and she sobbed silently.

Her heart had never ached like this before. She'd never known so much anguish. But Maddie allowed her tears for only a few minutes, before inhaling deeply and trying to come to terms with the events of the evening. She realized while her tears would subside, the sadness she felt tonight would linger for a long time.

She stood by her bedroom window and peered out into the night. A shadow of a figure emerged through the darkness. She recognized Trey, pulling a lead rope, with Storm on the other end. Storm kicked up a fuss, but Trey held firm and instead of retiring the stallion in his corral, he led him to the stables. Trey would probably stay with Storm throughout the night, making sure the horse settled down, keeping a vigil until Storm calmed.

Maddie had always thought Trey was so like Storm. Two wild spirits, two untamed souls who didn't know how to trust. She'd been with both tonight, optimistically thinking the two had been ready and hoping the bond she'd developed with each had been enough. Maddie had tested the waters and had nearly drowned. And she'd come to realize one distinct difference between Storm and his master. While Storm couldn't trust in others, Trey couldn't trust in himself.

But Maddie saw Trey so differently than he saw himself.

He claimed he had no staying power, but Maddie knew better. She knew him to be a man of worth and even if she decided to leave the ranch, Hope Wells and Trey Walker, she hoped to help him learn the truth about himself.

She figured she didn't have anything to lose.

Her heart was already broken.

 

Dawn forced its way through dark clouds, shedding dismal light and bringing a frosty chill to the air. Maddie showered quickly and dressed in her usual attire, jeans and a button-down blouse, then quickly headed to the barn where Storm was stabled. She had to make amends with the stallion. She'd pushed him too far last night and even though he'd responded to her more than any other person on the ranch, he still had a long way to go.

She wrapped her arms around her middle and entered the damp barn, realizing that while Trey had the means to heat the barn for the animals, he didn't have the funds. Only extreme temperatures warranted going to that expense.

Maddie recalled the first conversation she'd had with
her friend, Caroline regarding this unpredictable climate. “If you don't like the weather in Texas,” she'd said with a grin, “just wait about five minutes.”

This week had gone from warm sunny days to gusty dust storms and cold temperatures. She wondered about Denver and how well she would adjust to the climate there. In truth, she'd stayed up most of the night considering Nick's proposal, thinking about moving and wondering if leaving Hope Wells might be best for her.

Maddie put that thought out of her head as she walked up to Storm's stall. The horse rested on his side, lying down on a bed of wheat straw that was piled up high around the edges. With Storm's restless nature, a good bank of bedding against the walls insured the animal's safety. Trey had always put his animals first, whenever he could. It was probably the first trait that had attracted Maddie to him—his willingness to protect his livestock.

“Morning.”

Maddie whirled around and stared into the dark eyes of a rumpled Trey. His morning appearance, including an unshaven face and disheveled hair, reminded her that if things had turned out differently last night, she would have been waking up to that look today.

“He's all right,” he said, gesturing to Storm. “Took some time to get him settled, but we managed.”

Maddie nodded. “You stayed with him all night?”

“Most of it. Didn't get much sleep.”

Trey scratched his head, then ran a hand through his hair, attempting to straighten it, but only making stray strands stick up even more. His plaid shirt hung loosely over jeans that were smattered with dirt stains and sticky straw. Maddie wondered how a man could ap
pear incredibly vulnerable and downright sexy, all at the same time.

She ached inside, seeing him and knowing that what they shared would never be again. The pain went deep and Maddie struggled to keep her composure.

“Actually, I'm glad you're here,” he said quietly, and she wondered if his lack of sleep had anything to do with his dismissal of her last night. She wondered if he ached inside the way that she did. “I was planning on checking on you. How are you feeling this morning?”

Did he want to know her heart had broken?

“You took a fall and…well after, when we—”

“I'm fine, Trey.” She couldn't bear to discuss their lovemaking from last night. She couldn't speak to him casually about something that had meant so much to her. He'd made his feelings clear, rejecting even the thought of a relationship with her. Yes, she'd been terribly hurt, but not from the fall.

Trey swallowed and looked away.

Maddie turned to leave. It seemed there wasn't much else to say. She came to check on Storm and the poor animal looked exhausted. Apparently it had been a tumultuous night for all three of them. She promised herself to return later to make amends with the stallion.

“Maddie?”

She turned around. “Yes?”

Trey's gaze held her immobile. “You might not believe this, but I don't regret last night.”

She did believe him. Didn't he say he'd never had better sex. At least she had that to cling to on lonely nights. “Neither do I,” she replied honestly.

She walked to the barn door and then turned once again to find Trey's dark captivating eyes on her. “You
know, it was a lucky day for Storm when you brought him to 2 Hope. You've stuck by him all along, believing in that feisty headstrong stallion, even when others gave up on him. There aren't too many men who would have spent half the night in a cold dreary barn worrying over him. He
does
belong to you, Trey. Just like you belong to him.”