Lily and the Beast (Lily and the Beast #1) (11 page)

Michael was handsome and smart, from a good family.  A graduate student, well on his way to a promising career, and I respected his drive and ambition.  While he worked hard, he had a romantic side to him too, often taking a study break to show up at my dorm room with flowers or Chinese take-out.  He was everything a girl looked for in a guy. 

I’d been so humiliated at having to sign Aidan’s contract, I hadn’t told him much when I left – only that I had to go away for a year, and I’d understand if he didn’t want to wait for me.  Too chicken to talk to him face to face, I’d done it via email, which I still felt ashamed about.  I figured he’d be angry at the way I’d blown him off and move on.  It never occurred to me that he’d still be pining for me weeks later.

To tell the truth, my feelings for Michael had cooled, partly because of the way he’d forced me into talking to him in exchange for news about my dad, and partly because of Aidan.  I knew it was only sex, but what I shared with Aidan made me feel alive in a way I’d never felt with Michael.  It was as if my eyes had been opened, and I could finally see clearly – which was pretty ironic, considering I’d spent my time blindfolded.  But maybe he had the right idea there.  Maybe without my eyes, I’d been open to feel things on a whole new level?  Or maybe it was just hot as fuck to do a guy I’d never seen before. 

Either way, my feelings for Michael had settled at a lukewarm at best.  I resolved not to text him again.  All it did was upset us both, and I couldn’t risk making Aidan angry.  Maybe I was some kind of masochist, but I needed his approval, and I didn’t think I could bear his coldness again.  What we had now wasn’t enough, but I couldn’t help the glimmer of hope that he’d thaw again.  After all, he’d sent a nurse to take care of my father – that had to be about pleasing me just a little, wasn’t it?

The nights we’d spent in lazy conversation as I’d lain in his arms had been some of the most peaceful times of my life.  His gentle, languid touch had satisfied me on a completely different level than when he made me scream his name in total ecstasy.  Both were good, and equally important, and I missed that level of intimacy with him. 

I didn’t go inside right away, enjoying the crisp air and the sounds of spring as I thought about what Mrs. Fisk had told me.  I had so many questions, trying to understand the man who commanded me with a single touch.   

Shit
.  I was falling for Aidan Pierce and he didn’t give a fuck about me.  I shouldn’t give a damn about snuggle time with him.  I should just show up for the sex-olympics and go back to my room, counting off the days until I could return to my regular life.  But there I was pining for the feel of his strong arms around me, and the way he kissed my hair and murmured
good girl
– like I was his pet.  It was obvious he didn’t care about me in any way, since he kept brushing me off and keeping me at arm’s length. 

What the hell was wrong with me that I blew off a good man like Michael and sat there mooning over a guy I’d never even seen?  In disgust, I walked back to my room, shoving my phone away between the mattresses, and set off to find something to occupy myself until the master called again and it was time for me to dance to his tune. 

Aidan knew he’d been hard on Lily for the past few days and it wasn’t her fault.  Not that he’d hurt her in the playroom, that wasn’t his kink, but he’d known what he was doing when he treated her like one of the others.  His regular girls expected it.  They were paid to perform a duty, and they did it.  He was a good master, seeing to it that they were paid in more than money; it was a matter of pride to him that he could make any woman come.  But he didn’t owe it to them.  He certainly didn’t owe it to
her
. 

He didn’t want her to know him better, he didn’t want her to see.

Lily already saw far too much, worming her way into his life far beyond the playroom.  It was getting so he couldn’t focus on work or even sleep without his mind drifting to the way her hair shone in the firelight, and wondering what it would look like in the sun.  He’d be working on cost analysis spreadsheets and find himself thinking about that fucking freckle on the back of her neck and be overcome with such a strong desire to suck on it, that he’d go rock hard in an instant. 

It didn’t matter how many times he jerked off, or how many times he fucked her, he couldn’t get enough of her.  And it was driving him fucking insane.  So he cut himself off from her whenever he could, trying desperately to compartmentalize what they did together, so he could get his life back. 

But it hadn’t worked. 

At all. 

Not one fucking bit.   

And the worst thing was, he felt like a complete asshole for making her suffer through his mood swings, because he could see in the way her face crumpled when he hurt her.  The girl made no effort to conceal her emotions from him.  It was fascinating to watch when he brought her to the peak of orgasm, but devastating when he saw how swiftly his words cut her to the quick.  He could only imagine what it would do to him to see her without the blindfold. 

Aidan dreamed about the color of her eyes.  Sure, he’d seen them in pictures, he knew their shape, but what would they look like gazing at him?  Not the monster he’d become, but how he used to be, when he was healthy and whole.  What would it be like to see her gazing up at him with love?  

And then he’d known just how fucked up he was, even thinking about Lily loving a beast like him.  No, it was best to keep that wall up between them, but he was sorry about making Lily suffer in the process for his own fucked up issues. 

He hadn’t called for her that night, his own form of self-punishment.  But late, when the entire house was asleep, he’d gone down to her room, thirsty for the sight of her, desperate to fill that need.  Lily was no sleeping beauty, lying pristine atop the covers with a bouquet of flowers primly clasped in her hands.  She sprawled, her ass in the air and face buried in the pillow with one leg out of the covers.  She was even more appealing to him though, and he drank in her beauty, standing next to her bed like some kind of stalker, a single red rose in hand. 

For a few moments, he allowed himself the fantasy of waking her with a touch of the flower.  It was dark, there was a chance she wouldn’t see him before he ordered her to close her eyes.  Or if he kept his head tilted just so, he could rely on the cover of darkness to hide his true nature from her.  What would it be like to take her on the pristine white sheets, with nothing between them but a whisper and a moan?

Fuck
.  He was losing it again, descending into foolish romanticism.  Setting the rose down on the bedside table so she’d be sure to see it when she woke, his gaze caught on a dark stain on the bed. Aidan bent closer, peering in the darkness to see it wasn’t a stain at all, it was something wedged under the mattress, and he pulled it free.  It wasn’t anger that rolled through him when he realized it was her cell phone in his hand, but amusement. 
The sly little minx, breaking the rules
.  He’d have to punish her later.  His cock twitched just thinking about it. 

Tucking the phone into his pocket, so he could confront her with it later, Aidan forgot all about it until he was getting undressed and the phone tumbled onto the floor.  He couldn’t really blame her for wanting to stay in touch with her family, though he still thought they didn’t deserve her.  When he’d called Gray to make arrangements for a private nurse, the bastard hadn’t even asked him how Lily was doing.  At the time it’d pissed him off, but maybe it was because they were already chatting on a daily basis. 

Flipping the phone open, he expected to see a call logged to her home phone number.  Instead the last call was placed to a Michael Barnes.  Who the fuck was Michael?  She’d called him earlier that same day, and there were several missed calls from him, at all hours of the day and night.  Digging into the message function, the last two texts popped up on the tiny screen. 

[
Just call me, Lil.  I miss you.  I need to hear your voice again
.]

[
Give me what I want, and I’ll give you what you want
.]

What the fuck was this?  Her photo album showed several pictures of the same man, a real pretty boy, with thick, wavy, dark hair and a soft, almost feminine bone structure.  Lily smiled up at the guy at various hangouts on campus followed by one shot of him with his shirt off, hovering above her like he was about to fuck her. 

Was this Michael prick her boyfriend or something?  Was she calling him up to cry about all the sick shit Aidan made her do?  Or to tell him how much she missed him and couldn’t wait to see him again?  He’d known on some level that she couldn’t have any real feelings for him, but confronted with the fact that she was keeping a guy on the side while she fucked him, Aidan’s blood turned cold. 

He’d underestimated her.  What a perfect actress she was.  All those innocent gasps and tremulous lips when he thought he was hurting her feelings, and she was playing him this whole time.  Well, he could play too.  She was about to find out just how well. 

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I felt it the instant he noticed me there, his sharp intake of breath telling me I’d managed to surprise him, but I couldn’t judge if he was happy or angry to see me.

My chest rose as I sucked in a breath, little more than a whisper escaping me as I broke the silence, but I knew he heard my words.  “I’m ready for my punishment, Aidan.”

There was a creak on the bed and the snap of a book being closed, and my heart leapt as I felt him come closer, but his voice was cold when he spoke.  “Get up.  I didn’t ask you to do this.”

“But you want me to.”  I could feel his need radiating off of him in waves, drawing him closer.

“You think you know me?”  The sneer came through loud and clear in his tone, but I didn’t let it shake me.  I knew the truth.

“I know you,” I insisted softly, and he didn’t contradict me this time. The silence stretched between us, and I felt the heat of his fingers a microsecond before they touched my cheek.  I nuzzled into that touch, craving it more than I’d ever wanted anything before. 

“You don’t have to do this,” he said, his voice pleading – was it for me to say yes or no?  As I felt him kneel behind me, my heart beat faster, anticipation crackling over my skin like electricity. 

“I want to.”  I wanted to reach out and touch him, but I understood that he needed to feel in control for this to work.  Eyes still tightly shut, I kept my head down, my head tilting to one side.  “Blindfold me if you have to, but I want this.  I want you, Aidan.”

Long seconds ticked by, and I started to wonder if I’d been wrong.  Maybe he couldn’t get past this?  Maybe he didn’t want me the way I wanted him?  And then his mouth closed over that spot on my neck and his tongue swirled against my skin, sucking lightly.  My lips parted in relief even as desire shot through me from that single point of contact.  Aidan laid worship to that one spot with his lips and tongue and the scrape of teeth until I ached to feel the rest of his body pressed against mine. 

Unable to stop myself, I swayed and leaned back, rewarded by the press of his cock against my spine, already hard and straining for release against his soft, stretchy pants.  His mouth released my neck, hot breath fanning over my moist skin as his lips dragged up to my ear. 

“Keep your eyes closed,” he whispered, teeth catching my earlobe for a single, sharp bite. 

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A quick word of thanks to my proof reading team, rock on!  And special thanks to Laveda Kasch of Rock Out with Sweet Reads for putting together such a cool release day blitz.  Thanks so much for helping me get the word out!

Copyright © 2015 Amelia Jayne, all rights reserved.

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