Lily's List (5 page)

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Authors: N. J. Walters

Tags: #small town, #trust, #sexual fantasies, #steamy romance, #florist, #younger man older woman

BOOK: Lily's List
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She shuddered and moaned.

“Talk to me.” She could hear the growing
desperation in his voice and knew he was as close to the edge as
she was. That alone gave her the courage to continue.

“My hand is poised just above my pubic
hair.”

“Curly or straight? Or do you shave?”

Perspiration dotted her forehead as she
sifted her fingers through the thatch of hair. “Curly and
thick.”

Carson groaned. “You’re killing me here.”

“Pump your hand faster.” It was a turn-on to
know Carson was playing with his erection while she was touching
herself.

“I will if you spread your legs and touch
yourself.” His heavy breathing came through the line. “You’ve got
to talk to me. Tell me what you’re doing.”

Lily’s entire body felt more alive than it
had in years. The comforter touching the backs of her legs, bottom
and the long line of her spine was like a sensual caress. She
cupped one breast and tweaked her nipple as she raised her knees
and spread her legs. “I’ve got my legs parted and I’m touching my
breast, fingering my nipple. It feels so good.”

“Say my name as you touch yourself.
Please.”

“Carson,” she moaned as she skimmed her
fingers over her sex. “I’m slick and so wet and it’s all for
you.”

“Put your fingers inside yourself.”

She slowly slid one finger inside, arching
her hips to meet it. “I wish it were your fingers. They’re longer.
Thicker too.”

Carson was panting harder now. “God, Lily. I
wish it were my fingers too. I’d push them in one at a time,
stretching you, until I could get two or three inside you. Then I’d
fuck you with them, brushing my thumb over your clit until you
came.”

She inserted a second finger. Shifting her
hand from her breast, she spread the folds of her labia wide and
brushed her swollen clit with her middle finger. She tilted her
head back on the pillow, rocking her hips forward on each thrust.
“Two fingers. I’m using two,” she gasped. Her hips were pumping
hard, her entire being focused on the sensations coursing through
her body.

“I’m using both hands now. My balls are so
damn tight.” She could hear his groans getting more frequent.
“Harder, Lily. Harder.” She wasn’t sure if he meant for her to do
herself harder or if he was imagining that it was her hands
squeezing him harder while pumping faster. It didn’t matter. They
were both on the edge of oblivion.

The roots of the hair on her head began to
tingle. She pressed down hard on her clit and pushed her fingers
inside one final time. “Carson!” She screamed his name as she came,
barely registering when he yelled her name in return. Her hips
jerked as spasms rocked her. Heat washed over her, leaving pleasure
and exhaustion in its wake. When she finally came back to her
senses, she was sprawled on her bed with her hands still buried
between her thighs.

She shivered as the cool air began to dry the
light sheen of perspiration that covered her from head to toe.
Biting back a groan, she carefully removed her fingers from her
core and let her legs fall back flat onto the mattress. Grabbing
one end of the comforter, she flung it over herself. It didn’t
cover her totally, but it was the best she could do at the
moment.

She felt totally wrung out and slightly
embarrassed now that all her senses were returning. Her cheeks felt
warm and she knew if she looked in the mirror they’d be red. Was
Carson still on the line? She had no idea how much time had passed.
She licked her dry lips as she picked up the phone and held it
close to her ear. “Carson?”

“Yeah, I’m still here. That was
. . . that was incredible.” He sighed deeply. “The only
thing that could be better would be having you right here beside
me.”

Lily couldn’t suppress the thrill his words
brought her or the flash of heat it sent spiraling through her. But
she wasn’t sure what to say. Phone sex was crazy enough without
adding real sex to the mix.

“You don’t need to say anything.” His soft
voice and words of understanding had tears welling in her eyes. “I
know you’re probably not ready for us to have sex. But, Lily?” He
paused and took a deep breath. “I’m going to do my best to make you
ready.”

There was no doubting the sincerity in his
voice, and that made her extremely nervous. “I’m not sure I’ll ever
be ready.” It was one thing to have phone sex. They weren’t in the
same room together. Carson didn’t have to see her naked. She
wouldn’t mind seeing him naked, though.

“If you’re not, you’re not. I can accept
that. In the meantime, you have other things on your list we can
explore. I’ve got an idea or two of my own if you’re
interested.”

She shivered, but this time it wasn’t from
cold. She’d just had an incredible orgasm and yet her body felt hot
and prickly and needy. “We . . .” She cleared her throat
and tried again. “We can talk. In a day or two.” Lily figured she’d
need that much time to get over tonight so she didn’t break out in
a blush when she finally saw him.

“A day or two? Are you okay?” Concern was
ripe in his voice. She wished she could see his face, but that
might only make things even more awkward.

“Yes. No. I don’t know.” She didn’t feel like
herself at all. Where was the staid, responsible woman she’d known
all her adult life? It was as if Carson brought out a side of her
that she’d ruthlessly suppressed for more than twenty years. That
last time she’d allowed her wild side out she’d ended up pregnant
and married.

The difference now was that she was a woman,
not a young girl. She could handle this. At least that’s what she
told herself. She hoped she was right.

If she remained in control, then nothing
would go wrong. They could both have a few thrills, she’d get her
research done and no one would be hurt. Her sensible side told her
she was headed for trouble. But the part of her that had been
suppressed for so long, the sexual, sensual woman, urged her to
step outside her safe box and play.

What could it hurt?

Lily was afraid to answer that question.

“Two days, Lily. Then I want to see you even
if it’s just for a cup of coffee to talk.” She could hear the
determination in his voice and knew she wouldn’t be able to hold
him off for any longer than that.

“Friday. I’ll call you on Friday.”

“Do you have my number?”

She tried to think, but with all the emotions
rushing through her it was impossible. “Yes.” She had his business
card tucked in her address book. “You obviously have mine.” She
hadn’t even thought to ask him about that earlier.

Carson chuckled. “You were listed as Ethan’s
contact number.”

Of course, he would know her number because
of her son. Her mind really wasn’t working on all cylinders.

“If you don’t call me, I’ll call you. Don’t
worry so much, Lily. This is between us. The only rule is that
you’re comfortable with whatever we do. Okay?”

She couldn’t figure out why Carson was being
so kind and giving, but she wasn’t about to look a gift horse in
the mouth, not until she decided for sure what she wanted to do.
“Friday,” she reiterated. “Thank you, Carson.”

“My pleasure,” his deep voice rumbled.

“Good night,” she sighed, not wanting to
break the contact but knowing she had to.

“Sweet dreams, Lily. Think of me.” She heard
the click and then he was gone. Disconnecting, she tossed the phone
on her nightstand and curled her legs up to her chest. Her body was
still tingling everywhere and she groaned. She really needed to go
and clean herself up, and she would, just as soon as her skin
wasn’t quite so sensitive.

She wanted to think about what she should do
and what she should say on Friday, but her mind wouldn’t cooperate.
Instead, images of Carson filled her brain, each one more erotic
than the last.

She still couldn’t process the fact she’d
actually touched herself, made herself come while she’d been on the
phone with him. And he’d done the same. She’d heard his guttural
yell above her own cries of pleasure. She wondered what he looked
like when he came. He’d be all hot and sweaty and mussed.

Lily shivered and closed her eyes. Best not
to think about that. She’d rest for a bit longer and then she’d get
up. Hugging her arms tight around herself, she gave into the
fatigue nipping at her and drifted off to sleep.

Chapter Four

 

Late Friday afternoon, Lily stared at the
phone for what seemed like the hundredth time. The bell over the
shop door rang and she sighed with relief. She knew she had to call
Carson, but she still hadn’t figured out what to say to him.

True to his word, he’d stayed away yesterday,
but she knew that today was his limit. If she didn’t call him, she
expected to see him outside her door when she closed the store at
six o’clock. She glanced at her watch. That gave her less than half
an hour to figure out what to do.

It wasn’t like her to be this indecisive.
Running a small business and raising a child on her own, she’d had
to be clear-thinking and deliberate. Carson, however, left her
feeling shaken, emotionally and physically.

She couldn’t even call her two best friends,
Annabelle and Emma, to ask their opinions. What exactly would she
say to them?
I’ve had phone sex with Carson
Granger and now I want to do even more things with him, and not
just for research!
Then she’d have to explain why she needed
to research sex. They didn’t even know about her secret career. It
wasn’t something she was comfortable talking about, but she had a
feeling that was going to have to change in the near future. She
couldn’t keep her son and her best friends in the dark forever.

Just thinking about it was giving her a
headache. Forcing a smile on her face, she greeted her customer,
and fifteen minutes later the gentleman left with a bouquet of
wildflowers for his wife.

There was no one else around, so Lily did
something that she had never done before—she closed early. She
defiantly turned the sign over on the door and then locked it. The
metal clunk sounded overly loud. It was harder than she’d thought
it would be to head back to her cash register, tally the day’s
sales and start to fill out her deposit slip for the bank. She felt
guilty for shutting her doors early, even if it was only by a few
minutes.

A sharp rap on the door made her jump,
causing her to drag her pen across the deposit book. She swore
under her breath. Now she’d have to fill out another slip. Sighing,
she raised her head, resigned to dealing with an impatient
customer.

Instead, pale blue eyes filled with concern
met hers. Carson. Her eyes flew to the clock on the wall and back
to him. It was ten minutes to six. Knowing she couldn’t put off the
inevitable, she strode to the door. Ignoring her sweaty palms, she
turned the lock and let him in.

“I need to finish closing.”

Carson stared at her as if he were trying to
see inside her. She could have told him it wouldn’t do any good.
All he’d see was a jumble of emotions. “Take your time. There’s no
hurry.”

No hurry. Fine for him to say that. Time was
running out and she still hadn’t decided what she was going to say
to him. Putting off that decision for another few minutes, she went
back to the counter and filled out a fresh deposit slip. When she
was done, she placed her deposit in the night drop bag and carried
it back to her small office to tuck it in her purse. She’d drop it
off at the bank on her way home.

There were a dozen things that needed her
attention at the store. She needed to enter her sales figures in
her daily journal. It was the middle of the month and she needed to
pay the bills that had come in. She needed to inventory her supply
of decorative pots and vases. And she was coming up with a million
excuses to avoid Carson. Placing her hands on her small desk, she
lowered her head and took a deep breath.

“Lily?” He said her name and nothing more. He
didn’t have to. She knew what he was asking. She could feel his
presence as he moved closer to her. The fine hairs on her nape
stood on end and gooseflesh covered her arms and legs.

She raised her head and met his worried gaze.
“I’m not sure, Carson.”

He nodded. “That’s okay.” He wrapped his
hands over her shoulders, the heat seeping through the thin layer
of her dress. “You don’t have to decide anything right now. How
about we have some dinner and just talk?”

Just like that, he defused her tension. Like
a balloon suddenly deflating, she felt empty inside. At the same
time, she couldn’t discount the sense of relief she felt as well.
He began to massage her neck and shoulders, his strong fingers
finding the tight muscles and working the stress from them.

She tilted her head to one side, barely
suppressing a groan of pleasure. He was very good at this. Better
than good. What had she been thinking about? Oh, yes. Dinner. She
could do dinner.

“Okay. Dinner would be nice.” As soon as she
agreed, another worry nagged at her. She didn’t want to go to a
public place. The last thing she wanted was the good folk of
Summersville speculating about their relationship—such as it
was.

As if he understood her concerns, he leaned
down and kissed the curve of her ear. “Your place or mine?”

“Mine.” She’d feel more secure in her own
home, among her own belongings.

He nodded, his long, silky hair brushing the
curve of her neck. She shivered. She didn’t have to look down to
know that her nipples were visible against the thin fabric of her
dress. Her only saving grace was that the patterned material made
it harder to see them.

His hands came around her sides, resting on
her stomach just below the swell of her breasts. She sucked in a
breath, her nipples puckering tighter as his hands hovered there.
Finally, he heaved a sigh and took a step away from her. She wasn’t
sure if she was relieved or disappointed.

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