Little Black Break (Little Black Book #2) (13 page)

I HADN’T HEARD A PEEP from our little mystery writer. Part of me hoped the reason I hadn’t heard from him was because he got what he wanted. Part of me hoped that he was gone for good, but my darkness within knew that wasn’t the case. With the exception of Clive coming into my life and Rosslyn turning my world inside out, my luck had never been that great.

In the light of day, I knew exactly what I was going to do with our strange situation. My night with Rosslyn had opened up my eyes and made me realize I wasn’t going to let some faceless, nameless fuck run my life. No one told me what to do. No one directed the way I lived my life.

It didn’t matter if he sent another letter. It didn’t matter what that possible letter said. I was done giving this son of a bitch the upper hand.

Until Mac could locate the piece of shit so I could destroy him, I was taking Rosslyn away. There were white sandy beaches and fruity drinks in our future. There were privacy and sunlight.

We could finish planning the wedding on an island in the middle of nowhere. Someplace warm and light—someplace where I could relax and stop worrying about every fucking thing in the world crashing in around me and taking away the happiness I’d obtained.

It was the only way I could make sure Rosslyn was one hundred percent safe. Taking her out of harm’s way made sense to me.  Even though I hadn’t had much sleep and I was fucking exhausted, I was still wide awake. My brain was running a million miles a minute. I ended up waking her in the middle of the night after the idea hit me.

It took her a few minutes to comprehend what I was telling her since she was still half-asleep, but when it finally sunk in, she laughed and thought I was crazy. She’d become accustomed to my impromptu vacations, so it didn’t seem entirely too bizarre to her. Since the beginning of our relationship, we’d visited quite a few places.

Still, she’d called me nuts, and I didn’t blame her. I’m sure I looked and sounded psychotic. She was clueless about the letters, and I wanted to keep it that way. Let her think what she wanted about me. All that mattered was her safety.

We spent the rest of the night making plans and fell asleep in each other’s arms when the sun was peeking in through the massive windows looking out over New York City.

I WAS IN THE PROCESS of getting everything in order for Mike, the club manager, to make things easier on him. I didn’t want to be disturbed while we were away on our little getaway, and I knew if I didn’t have things perfectly under control before we left, Mike would call with questions. I’d left him in charge before, and it wasn’t an easy thing for me to do since I was a control freak, but I knew he was the man for the job.

This time, though, it was different. Usually, we had a timeline and Mike knew exactly what to expect. This time, I wasn’t sure how long we’d be gone, so I needed to make sure everything was going to be taken care of.

I sighed when I came across the plans for the restaurant. I had a huge surprise for Rosslyn, but all of that was going to have to wait for now, including the grand opening. I hated that I was going to have to put it on hold, but I was done playing the waiting game.

Mac came in and I looked up briefly, taking in his strong stance and dark suit. As usual, he was bringing in the mail. We hadn’t gotten another letter in the last six days. Not since I’d given over the twenty grand, and I didn’t really expect anything today. Every day that went by without another letter made me breathe a little easier.

Rosslyn was busy with cramming in last-minute wedding plans. She was working on the few things we couldn’t do from the comfort of our own island in the middle of nowhere. While she was out, I’d made sure Mac was with her every second she was away.

I hated to do it since we’d just gotten over an argument about lies, but I lied to her. I didn’t want to give her a reason to question me. So when she asked why Mac was suddenly her new addition, I told her I’d already given Martin the time off since we were leaving. She seemed to believe that, and suddenly, it made sense to have Mac driving her around from place to place.

“But I can drive myself,” she’d argued.

Again, I’d lied.

“I almost forgot to tell you, sweets. I sent the Honda in to have it serviced.”

With that, she didn’t have much of a choice. She had to let Mac drive her around town.

“Almost finished,” I told him. “Oh, and Rosslyn has an appointment tomorrow for a fitting or something for her wedding dress that can’t wait until after we get back. Her appointment is set for eleven, so if you can be here by ten thirty.”

He didn’t respond and I looked up to make sure he was listening to me. He stood there, looking stiff and grim, and I knew what he was about to tell me.

“Give it to me,” I demanded, sticking my hand out.

My heart was beating a hundred times faster than it should as I waited for him to hand it over. Still, he stood there holding the fucking envelope that I knew would screw up our newly set plans. “Mac …” I warned.

He sighed and handed it to me. Wasting no time, I ripped open the damn thing and then taking a much-needed breath, I flipped open the paper.

I felt like the world had shifted on its axel and at any moment I was going to be thrown from the Earth and lost in a black hole of nothingness. Sweat beaded on my forehead, and suddenly, I felt like the very life was being sucked from my being.

“Black? What does it say?”

Mac sounded a million miles away, his voice an echo bouncing off the walls and slamming against the invisible wall that went up around me.

Without thinking, I threw the letter down.

“Fuck!” I growled, slamming my fist on my desk.

Mac wasted no time in picking it up, his eyes skimming the same words I’d just finished reading. I opened the drawer and lifted the last letter and read it over and over again.

Might. Might. Might. Might.

That was the only word that stuck out at me. It was what I’d missed, what I had overlooked. He had no intention of accepting the money and backing off. I’d paid it. I’d given him exactly what he wanted, and now, he knew he had my balls in his hand.

He’d already broken into Rosslyn’s car—he’d already gone too far as far as I was concerned. He’d been inches from her—touched her sweet skin—held a knife to her. Although he hadn’t intended to hurt her at the time, the next time would be different.

He was playing a game.

He was fucking with me.

“A life for a life?” Mac asked, confused. He looked up at me, his eyes suddenly suspicious. “What the hell does that mean?”

Who the fuck knew what that meant?

This was obviously personal, but I had no idea how it was personal or how to make it go away. I could take Rosslyn away, I could keep her safe for now, but I couldn’t keep her hidden away forever.

Worrying about her was making me a runner. I’d never been the type of man to run from any fucking thing. It was time this son of a bitch understood that.

“It means that motherfucker’s a dead man.” I stood, straightening my suit and adjusting my tie. “If you can’t find him, fine. But it’s high time the old Sebastian came back. He doesn’t know who he’s fucking with. I’ll find him, and when I do, he’ll wish he was still a swimmer in his daddy’s nut sack.”

I knew what I had to do.

He’d win, if for only a little while.

I’d do whatever it took to keep Rosslyn safe. Even if that meant stepping away from her.

Even the thought of it made my stomach twist in pain. He’d said in the letter.

It was going to kill me—break me and bend me—but I had to leave her alone. I had to stay away from her, and she had to remain clueless about the letters. She’d never stay away from me because of a letter. I had to do this for her—for us. It was going to destroy me—turn me blacker than I’d ever been before—but Rosslyn was the only thing that mattered.

She was my light.

My love.

My world.

Without her, I’d cease to exist. Because of that, I had to cut all ties with her.

“SO EVERYTHING’S GOOD
AND NOW
you’re going on an amazing vacation to some fucking island where you’ll be surrounded by unlimited fruity drinks and sunshine?” Trish asked, flipping the magazine of bridesmaid’s dresses closed and popping her gum loudly. “God, you’re so fucking lucky. I can’t get Brice to even suck my clit, much less take me on a vacation.”

I laughed. Trish had no filter, as usual.

She’d spend most of the morning telling me about how busy her new boyfriend was and how he wasn’t very great in bed. I’d spent most of the morning regaling her with the epic argument between Sebastian and me that had taken place almost a week ago. Everything was fine now, but I hadn’t gotten to talk to Trish about everything until now. So much had happened in the last week including the spontaneous getaway Sebastian had sprung on me the night before.

“Yes, everything’s good now,” I answered. “I think,” I added.

I was sure that eventually we’d have everything worked out, but for a minute there, the unknown future terrified me. I’d been furious with Sebastian for demanding I quit my job and treating me like nothing more than a piece of furniture he owned.

No one owned me, and I wasn’t going to start letting any man, not even Sebastian Black, tell me when and what I could and couldn’t do. Work included.

As angry and as hurt as I was with Sebastian, I knew he wasn’t totally at fault for our situation. I felt terrible that I’d lied and held things back from him. I’d hurt him, and for the three days that followed our fight in the kitchen, we barely spoke a word to each other. Still, as much as I knew he’d deny it, I could see how badly I’d hurt him every time he looked at me.

His eyes had been darker—shadowed in doubt—full of pain and insecurities. Even now, after we’d moved past our argument, my deception, and his demands, he no longer fully trusted me, and that bothered me. I was trustworthy, dammit. Sure, I’d lied, but it was not like he gave me much of a choice. I was terrified of losing Sebastian.

I felt myself giving in to him, and I knew I was only going to give him the cold shoulder for another day or so. I hated the tension in our relationship even more than I hated his demands. But before I could fold, he beat me to it. And when he started to cry, I couldn’t hold back from him anymore. He needed me to comfort him as much as I needed him to comfort me

“What do you mean, you think?” Trish asked, bringing me out of my thoughts.

She was wearing a frown of confusion as she lifted the champagne flute to her lips and waited for me to answer her. It took me a second to respond because I wasn’t even exactly sure what I’d meant. My mind wandered to the night before, and even though it was probably the best night I’d ever spent with Sebastian, it left me with an odd, almost sad, feeling.

“He seemed off last night. He was upset about something. Not angry upset but something was really bothering him.”

“Did you ask him?”

“Of course, I did but …”

But he was Sebastian Black and as much as he’d grown since I’d met him, he still struggled to share the burden of his problems with me.

“But he’s a man and, therefore, wasn’t cracking.” She finished my sentence for me.

“Pretty much. We leave tomorrow, and I don’t want to ruin our trip, but I also don’t want him to deal with this alone.”

She shrugged. “Maybe it’s nothing.”

“Maybe …”

I just wished I could make my heart believe that as easily as Trish did.

“Ms. Black?”

The sales woman called the name, and the sound of it sent shivers down my spine. In a few short months, I was officially going to be
Mrs. Rosslyn Black.

At my expression, the sales lady looked down at the paper in her hand to check and looked up with a smile.

“I’m so sorry, Ms. Harris. You’re not quite Mrs. Black yet, now are you?”

I giggled, and it sounded embarrassing to my own ears. “Not quite.”

Her smiled was warm and excited, and I couldn’t help but match her enthusiasm.

“We have your dress ready.”

I looked down at Trish, and her smile was as big as mine was. “Go!” she shouted and pointed her finger in the direction of the saleswoman. “I can’t wait to see you in your beautiful dress that cost more than my parents’ house.”

I laughed.

I wasn’t usually an extravagant woman, but the second I’d seen the dress, I knew it was the one. I almost walked out when I saw the price tag, but after mentioning it to Sebastian, he insisted I buy the dress and even threatened to buy it himself. It was a tradition. I couldn’t have him seeing my dress before the big day.

“Dressing room is right over here. Please follow me.”

“Okay.”

I was suddenly nervous, and my palms felt sweaty as I followed her to the room.

“I’m right behind you,” Trish announced, setting her empty champagne glass on the table beside the plush, white sofa she’d been sitting on.

Two saleswomen and fifteen minutes were what it took to get me into what would be the dress I wore on one of the most important days of my life.

“You look absolutely stunning,” the younger of the two saleswomen said.

“We’ll give you a few minutes,” the other said, and they opened the door and left me alone in the overly decorated space.

I stood there staring at myself in the tall mirror, and I hardly recognized the woman staring back at me. It was hard to believe this was my life now. I was going to marry the man who I loved more than anything—the man who’d swooped into my life like a proverbial knight in shining armor. Although Sebastian would disagree with him being anyone’s savior, he really had changed my life and the life of my brother for the better.

Still, that was just a bonus. I could live without the money. He—my dark knight—was who I couldn’t live without, and in just a few short months, he’d be all mine.

I didn’t think it was possible, but I was sublimely happy. Things were perfect, and in a way, that scared me.

The amount of contentment that filled me almost seemed criminal, as if I’d stolen the happiness of hundreds out of the universe and kept it for myself. It seemed wrong for one person to possess so much delight.

I never wanted to have another fight with Sebastian, and I vowed at that moment, as I stood in front of a mirror draped in thousands of dollars, that no matter how afraid I was—no matter how upset I knew I’d make him—I was never going to lie to him again.

I would be an amazing wife to him, and more importantly, I would make sure my soon-to-be husband would never cry the way he had the night before. Thinking of Sebastian and the sad tears that had dripped over his perfectly sculpted chin left me feeling a little insecure. I wasn’t sure I could handle that kind of sadness from him, and making a promise to myself that I’d always keep him happy was a big job.

I shook myself.

Standing in the mirror, wearing something so beautiful, I had to stop thinking such negative things. I wasn’t about to curse my dress with unhappy thoughts.

Turning to the side, I smiled to myself. The dress was gorgeous. The sweetheart neckline made my cleavage look amazing, and without straps, it displayed my shoulders nicely. My waist looked tiny and my hips curvy as the fabric followed the natural curves of my body before going tight around my knees and flaring at the bottom. It was sophisticated yet sexy, and I knew as I let my eyes move over the expensive fabric that Sebastian was going to love it.

“Are you going to come out today? I’m dying out here,” Trish called from the other side of the door.

I’d almost forgotten she was with me. My cheeks heated and I grinned to myself.

It really was the dress. I’d found it.

“I’m coming,” I called out.

Lifting the fabric of my dress, I stepped down from the low pedestal. “Are you ready?” I taunted, peeking through a crack in the dressing room door.

“Oh my God, yes! Get your ass out here already!”

I laughed, pulling open the door and stepping out of the dressing room. The look on Trish’s face sent a jolt of excitement through my system.

“Holy shit, Rosslyn. You look … I can’t even … you look beautiful.” Tears shimmered in her eyes, and I found my own eyes watering.

“Don’t cry,” I begged. “If you cry, I will.”

“I can’t help it.” She sniffled. “You’re practically glowing.”

“Thank you.” Heat warmed my cheeks.

“How do you feel?”

I smoothed my hands over my hips and shrugged. “I feel amazing. I never want to take the dress off.”

“So this is the one, yes?” She clapped in excitement making me laugh once again.

“This is definitely the one.”

She squealed. “You’re going to make an amazing bride, Roz. I’m so freaking happy for you.”

“Thank you. I couldn’t imagine not having you or Kyle there.”

Even in my happiness, sadness moved in.

My parents.

Deep inside, it hurt that they wouldn’t be there. That my father wouldn’t give me away and that my mother wouldn’t be standing to the side dabbing her eyes with a tissue.

I had it all, but then again, I didn’t.

Whatever I was feeling must have shown in my expression because Trish’s smile dropped and she touched my arm.

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

I blinked away my tears and shook my head. “Nothing. I just wish my parents were going to be there, too.”

I fought hard to hold back the tears as I smoothed out the non-existent wrinkles down the front of my dress.

“Oh, Roz …” She didn’t know what to say, and that was okay because there wasn’t really anything to say.

“It’s okay. I just can’t help but think of them and how much I wish my mother would be there to help me get ready or my father there to walk me down the aisle and give me away.”

“I know you do, babe. I wish they could be here, too.” She wrapped her arm around me, and I rested my head on her shoulder. “I know it’s not even remotely close, but I’ll definitely be there to help you get ready, and I think Kyle is the perfect person to give you away.”

I smiled through the tears and nodded in agreement. I could hardly wait to see my baby brother in his tux. He was handsome, and I missed him like crazy. Since it had always been Kyle and me against the world, it made sense to have him give me away. He was the only family I had left in the world, and he was the best brother a girl could ask for. 

“Rosslyn? What’s wrong?” Sebastian’s deep voice sounded from behind me.

I gasped and turned around, the fabric of my dress wrapping around my legs in my rush. I was positive my ears were playing a trick on me, but when I saw him standing there, I knew I wasn’t seeing things.

“Sebastian! What are you doing here?”

It was too late to cover up or run back into the dressing room as his eyes moved down my body, taking in the dress—ruining the surprise and breaking tradition. The look on his face was full of mixed emotions, and I was having a hard time pinpointing each one.

“I …” He stuttered over the one word as he tried to put together a sentence. “You look …”

His eyes were wide when they met mine, and I could see everything he couldn’t say swimming in their depths.

I smiled. “Thank you, but you’re not supposed to see me in my dress before the wedding. It’s bad luck,” I joked.

Trish giggled, but he didn’t even smile.

“Why are you crying?” His brows pulled down in worry.

“We were talking about her parents,” Trish so graciously chimed in.

Sebastian cringed. I silently wished I had beaten Trish at responding, but I couldn’t be mad at her. It wasn’t as if she knew the situation. She’d never understand why Sebastian felt guilty for the loss of my parents, and I wasn’t about to explain and make her understand. Our business was ours. Our past and our secrets also ours.

Sebastian nodded. “Can I talk to you? Alone,” he added for Trish, even though his eyes never left mine.

Something in his tone triggered worry, and I suddenly felt cold inside. I wanted to clutch Trish to me and force her to stay.