Little Disquietude (18 page)

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Authors: C. E. Case

Tags: #lesbian, #theatre, #broadway

BOOK: Little Disquietude
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Sophia squirmed. She tugged at Leah's dress,
leaving nail marks on her skin. Leah found her mouth again. Sophia
arched back, giving more of herself to Leah's kiss. Leah settled
against shifting body, wanting to pin Sophia down and keep her
still enough to kiss each part of her face.

She hadn't expected Sophia to be like this;
to yearn for her touch. To pull her close with strength that could
not be undone. To make such high-pitched, keening sounds Leah could
feel vibrating in her throat. She kissed Sophia's neck, trying to
provoke more of Sophia's desire.

Doubts pressed Leah's mind. Only one night of
this might tear her to pieces. And trying to build a life from it
might be worse. She couldn't tell what was in her own heart beyond
lust. She was afraid to look past herself to Sophia. She assessed.
Sophia was lying on her back. Her eyes were closed and her lips
were parted.

Leah's heart told her it would be stupid to
turn away. Stupid to ask questions or to pretend, as she had with
Grace, that it wasn't really happening; stupid to try and get it
over with. There were moments on stage in
Poe
when she'd
felt a rush of arousal go through her. That heat carried thoughts
of Sophia and she'd let Ward touch her, caress her and brush kisses
along the curve of her ear. She'd sought to extend the moment into
something real. But she'd feel nothing from him. The embers of
arousal would diminish and gust away.

Sophia cupped her cheek, urging her up,
trying to meet her eyes.

Leah blinked, and focused on her face.

"Hey," Sophia said. "Stop thinking."

"I'm not thinking." She was feeling
everything at once, unsure which instinct to follow; to mate, to
fight, to flee. She said, "I'm afraid--"

"I'm not afraid." Sophia playfully rotated
her hips under Leah's.

Leah grasped her wrist and nipped at Sophia's
thumb. At Sophia's intake of breath, at the widening of her eyes,
Leah drew it into her mouth and sucked.

Sophia stopped breathing. Her lips remained
parted, her eyes focused on Leah's face. Leah met her eyes and felt
for the first time, they were linked. They were together in this.
She ran her tongue along the underside of Sophia's thumb.

Sophia twitched.

Leah moved Sophia's wrist and nuzzled along
fine blue veins.

Sophia shuddered. Leah moved to the hollow of
Sophia's elbow and Sophia let out a shuddering breath. So
responsive, and they were just beginning. "Just beginning," she
said out loud. Sophia closed her eyes.

Leah wondered how many others had made love
to Sophia. Were they gentle? Rough? Did they take or give? Had
Sophia had enough experience to know what she wanted from Leah? Did
she have enough boldness to tell her? Leah draped Sophia's arm
behind her neck and kissed her. Sophia responded eagerly, squirming
to get a better connection with her mouth, using her arm like a
weight to hold Leah against her.

Leigh wanted to ravish her, but found herself
constricted by clothes. She could take Sophia and complete their
passion in a matter of seconds, but not fully clothed.

Not even partially clothed. They were meant
to be naked.

She left the bed. Sophia reached out for her
blindly and then opened her eyes. Leah winked.

"Is it over?" Sophia asked. Her lips twitched
into a smile. She tucked her hands behind her head.

"Oh, you'll know."

Sophia smiled with teeth.

Leah reached behind herself to work the
zipper.

"I could--" Sophia offered.

"No," Leah said. Sophia raised her eyebrows.
"No, lie just like that."

Sophia blushed but settled back on the
pillows, the gown riding up to reveal her calf and her ankle and
the high-heeled pump she still wore. She kicked it off. Leah lost
all focus on the zipper. Her hands trembled. She turned away from
Sophia, needing a moment to concentrate. She wanted so badly that
she was tangling herself up. She got the zipper down below her
waist.

Sophia exhaled audibly.

Leah looked back. Sophia was lying in the
same position. Smiling. Leah met her eyes. Sophia licked her lips
and dipped her head to give Leah a practiced sexy, smoldering look,
which nearly undid her. She turned around again. She pulled the
straps off. Her bare back, slightly sore and already marked with
Sophia's fingernails, was still guarded by the thin white band of
her bra.

"You can do that part," She said, and then
held her breath.

Fingers danced down her arms. She shivered.
"Tickles." The fingers dug into her arms instead, massaging.

"Better?"

Leah nodded.

Sophia kissed her neck. Leah hissed. When
Sophia was on the bed, a few feet away from her, it had been
possible to keep her thoughts in order. Now Sophia's fingers and
tickling lips robbed her of thoughts and order both. Mercifully,
Sophia unclasped the bra and let it fall. Then she pressed herself
against Leah's back, slipping her arms around Leah's stomach.

Leah pushed her away. "Not done yet." She
felt like she was on fire.

"Clearly." Fingertips stroked Leah's
abdomen.

Exposed to the air, Leah's nipples felt as
hard as diamonds, tight and demanding more direct stimulation. Leah
wanted Sophia's touch on her breast. The slightest brush would be a
relief, and it would undo her.

"When I turn around," Leah said, "I want to
see you on the bed."

Sophia's caress left her. The bed creaked.
Leah bit her lip until it hurt to hold back a squeak from the sound
alone. She turned around, baring herself to Sophia, whose dress
rode up even further, exposing a knee.

Sophia gave a lingering look to her chest,
and then her gaze traveled to Leah's face, not changing expression,
taking her in. Leah ached to be closer to her. She pushed her dress
off her hips. The thong went with it, pooling on the floor. Her
face burned with the shame of the wetness on her thighs. She let
Sophia look at her, at the trimmed patch of hair at the crux of her
hips, at her belly, at her breasts, which felt swollen. Her nipples
were straining for contact and were connected to the pulse between
her legs.

She knelt on the bed, and took the hem of
Sophia's dress in her hand. "I think I gave up on the tearing too
soon."

Sophia slid her foot along Leah's arm. Leah
grabbed the arch and kissed Sophia's ankle, reveling as Sophia
twitched. Her legs were open and Leah could see the shadowed
promise beyond her knees.

She bit into Sophia's calf. Sophia yelped.
Leah looked up at her face, worried. But Sophia's expression only
showed lust. No shock, no fear.

Leah was naked, but she didn't feel exposed.
She felt powerful and limber, crawling up between Sophia's legs,
pushing the dress up. Sophia, languid, teasing, stayed mostly
still. Leah pressed a kiss to Sophia's knee, and said, "If we had
scissors, I could cut it off."

Sophia trembled but didn't break her
gaze.

"Would you trust me? Pressing the blade
against your skin?"

"Yes," Sophia said, and inhaled sharply.

"Tearing," Leah said.

Sophia didn't speak, just swallowed, her
throat rising and falling.

Leah slid her hand under Sophia's dress. She
found heat and pressed harder. Being this close to Sophia was
intoxicating. She needed to kiss her. She needed to feel more.
Sophia's hand covered hers and squeezed. Leah moved up Sophia's
body to kiss her. Sophia kissed her back, making keening sounds
against her mouth. Leah kept her hand still. Sophia moved against
it urgently.

"You're not naked," Leah said.

"Are you a fucking nudist?"

Leah withdrew her hand. She slipped her arms
under Sophia and managed to unbutton the four buttons holding
Sophia's dress together. Sophia met her eyes and smiled.

"Am I heavy?" Leah asked.

"Hardly."

Leah peeled the dress off Sophia's upper
torso. Sophia's breasts made her nearly lose her resolve. She sank
down and took Sophia's mouth in a crushing, hungry kiss. Her
breasts rubbed against Sophia's. Her nipples tingled as they
pressed into skin.

"God," Sophia said.

Leah kissed Sophia's neck sucking, wanting
the taste of Sophia in her mouth. Sophia's harsh panting filled her
ears. Becoming words.

She lifted her head. "What?"

"Mercy."

Leah brushed hair out of her face.

"I need--" Sophia said, and lost her breath
again.

"What?"

"To be naked."

Leah grinned. "Told you."

"Mercy," Sophia pleaded.

Though she was so aroused she felt heavy,
saturated with desire that compelled her to push into Sophia, to
forget about elegant form, to take her, Sophia had asked for mercy.
Leah sat up and pulled Sophia up with her to sit side-by-side. Leah
held her hands. Sophia squeezed them, and then lifted them to her
mouth and kissed each knuckle. Sophia's dress, half-off, was not
torn, but rumpled and twisted around her waist. Leah studied the
remnants of the black fabric instead of Sophia's breasts. Sophia
sucked at her skin between the first finger knuckle and the thumb.
Leah met her eyes. Sophia bit her hand.

Leah stopped breathing.

Sophia bit harder. A surge of fear went
through Leah, cancelling and then stoking her arousal. She couldn't
wrest her hand away without Sophia mangling her. Sophia's teeth
weren't hurting but they transmitted the promise of pain. Leah
leaned forward, careful not to push too hard against Sophia's lips,
and whispered in her ear, "Mercy."

Sophia held her in her grip. Leah kissed her
ear, and then whispered again. Sophia released her. Leah covered
Sophia's mouth with her whole hand. She stroked Sophia's cheeks
with her fingertips, and then on her jaw and her neck. Sophia
arched her neck.

Leah reluctantly pulled back and stood up.
Another twinge of fear went through her at being naked. But she was
beginning to like the prickling, shivering feeling. She urged
Sophia to her feet. The dress, bunched at her waist, did not slide
invitingly to the floor as Sophia stepped into her embrace. Leah
sighed, hugged her close, and then knelt to pull the dress
down.

She kissed Sophia's hip. Sophia touched her
hair. They stayed like that, Leah soaking in the intimacy, and then
she helped Sophia step out of her dress. She looked up to drink
Sophia in. Sophia had smooth and richly tanned skin. Naked, her
hips were wider than Leah had noticed in the dress, and her waist
was petite. Leah stood carefully, sliding up the side of Sophia's
body. Her apple-shaped breasts ended in dark areola and jutting
nipples. Leah covered them with her hands.

Sophia's dark and watery eyes met Leah's.
Leah couldn't remember why she'd thought Sophia wrong for the
classic stage. She was born for Macbeth, for tragedy. Leah wrapped
her arms around Sophia and held her close, tucking herself into
Sophia's neck and closing her eyes. Sophia settled against her
back, and they were together, pushing against each other, toes
curling, arches rubbing, as close as they could get and still
stand. Sexual energy smoldered and filled the room. There was no
space for old lovers. This was neutral territory, a gap between
universes, Leah's in New York, and Sophia's in North Carolina.
Everything beyond them evaporated. Leah, filled with wondrous joy,
wanted to laugh. Her throat closed. Her jaw tightened. She gripped
Sophia more tightly.

"I'm not sure where to begin," Leah said.

"Haven't you done this before?"

"It kind of feels like 'no.'"

"Yeah."

Leah rubbed her back and worked her thigh
between Sophia's. "Any suggestions?"

"Think of it like a new show. Start at the
end, and work backwards." There was something in her voice that
revealed to Leah, along with the way Sophia was moving against her
thigh, Sophia's desperation. There would be no more pleas for
mercy. Leah could have what she wanted. But it wasn't a show. There
was no director, no cast. No worrying about compromise. No need to
negotiate, to modulate her voice to the seconds someone ticked off
for her, no need to change her expression based on command.

Leah stepped back. Her body protested leaving
the embrace, wanting her to fall back into Sophia's arms. For a
moment she could only walk backward, one step at a time, until she
was sufficiently free from Sophia's aura. She was still trembling
but she walked around the bed, knowing Sophia watched. She tried
not to be self-conscious about how her ass looked, or her breasts,
dangling as she bent down and pulled back the covers on the bed.
Sophia helped her on the other side. Once the comforter was dumped
on the floor, Sophia quirked a brow at her.

"What?"

"I can't help but notice this seems to be
starting at the beginning," Sophia said.

"Technicalities." Leah knelt on the bed and
extended her hand. Sophia knelt, too, matching her posture. They
came together and kissed. No more waiting. Leah's desire flooded
through her, warming her, seeking out Sophia. She ached almost
wantonly as she covered Sophia's body with her own, pushing her
into the bed. Her knee settled between Sophia's legs. This was just
the beginning. Her heart pounded. She kissed Sophia, letting
Sophia's need for her wash through her, until Sophia's grip on her
started to hurt. Leah felt a step behind as Sophia writhed under
her, seeking completion. She untangled herself from Sophia's legs,
which prompted a cry of protest.

"Don't stop now," Sophia said, just as Leah's
mouth settled over her breast. Sophia said no more, just cradled
Leah's head in her hands and pushed herself against Leah's lips,
trying to find the contact she'd so briefly, satisfyingly had. Leah
suckled and the nipple, already swollen, firmed against her
flicking tongue. She left it, angry and glistening with saliva, and
captured the other one.

Sophia's head arched back. Her eyes closed.
She breathed hard, almost panting. Her chest heaved. Leah knew she
felt the same way. Ready. Too ready.

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