Loki (15 page)

“Nevin, surely you do not still hold Loki’s parentage against him, do you?”

He turned to face Lady Madeline, his gaze on the rushes on the floor. “My lady, I have naught against young Loki, he appears to be a nice lad. But my wife made me promise to marry the girls to either noblemen or to members of Clan Grant, that is, lads born into the clan. I only try to do as my dear wife requested.”

“I think you should get past that. If your dear Bessie stood in front of me today, you know she would agree with me and allow the marriage.”

Bella tried to keep her tears inside, not wanting anyone to see how much her sire’s rejection hurt.

“Nay, my lady. I must disagree with you. On this, my Bessie was adamant.”

“Surely, you cannot hold Bella’s feelings against her. She’s a young lass.”

He refused to lift his gaze to either of them, but continued. “I do not mean to be cruel to Bella, but she works in your kitchens now. She can sleep there. I’m sure I can take care of myself, so I am no longer in need of her. I’m sure she’ll be of benefit to your Cook.”

Bella hung her head and left, not wanting to hear the rest of the conversation. She’d never be with her husband. Never.

***

After hearing how poorly Bella’s meeting had gone with her sire, Loki decided there was no sense in waiting. Now that Bella was no longer living with the man, mayhap he would agree to bless the marriage. After all, the man had practically disowned her, though he hadn’t used those words. Loki had discussed the mattered with his father and they had agreed to pay a visit to Nevin.

Once they had been admitted, Nevin scowled at both of them. “I assume this is about the same issue? Must we continue to talk about my daughter? Please do not belabor this. She made her decision to not abide by my rules, so now she is living in the kitchens.”

Brodie didn’t bother to explain that Bella was sleeping in Loki’s old chamber while he slept with the guards. They had discussed this on their way down the hill, and they’d decided it would be best not to anger Nevin by revealing the details of their arrangement.

Loki cleared his throat. “If I may, I’d like to once again request that you allow Arabella to be my wife. I promise to protect her and treat her kindly.”

Nevin glared at Loki for a moment, clearly wanting to make an impression before he spoke. “Nay, you’ll not be marrying my daughter.”

Brodie replied, “And what is it about my son that you find objectionable, Nevin? We’ve known each other a long time. I stand in front of you asking you to honor my son’s request. Arabella and Loki care for each other, and they will make a good pair.”

Loki stood to the side, not having seen a temper in his sire often.

“You know why, Brodie. He’s not a Grant. If he were your true son, I’d be honored to have Bella marry him.” Nevin’s lips set in a grim line over clenched teeth. “I’ve told all of your family about Bessie’s request. I must honor her.”

Brodie opened and closed his fists three times before he spoke again. “He’s my son and his name is Loki Grant.”

“You adopted him. I understand that, and I have no trouble with the lad living with our clan, but he’s not a blood Grant. If my Arabella is to marry, it will be to a man of noble blood. I’ve explained it before. Now why must you continue to question me?”

“Nevin, you are fully aware our laird can order the marriage if he pleases.”

“Aye, but if he was planning to do that, he would have done it by now. My laird honors the relationship between my sire and yours. They were the best of friends, and I do no’ think he will act against my wishes.” Nevin returned to his chair and turned his head away. “Leave me be.”

“And your daughter’s happiness means naught to you? Because she prefers my son.”

Nevin’s expression did not change.

Brodie’s face reddened and he looked as if he were about to punch someone, but he controlled himself. “Nevin, this will never be forgotten.” He turned to Loki. “Son, let’s take our leave. We’re talking to a fool, an auld fool.”

Loki stared at the rafters and sighed. It was not to be just yet.

Chapter Sixteen

Loki jerked up in his pallet, panting. His gaze searched the room, but there was nothing amiss. The rest of the guards were sleeping. Finally, the memories settled in. He had been dreaming…again…another horrific dream of his childhood. He rubbed his face to try to erase the awful sensations coursing through his body, but they did not fade so easily.

After grabbing his plaid, his sword, and his boots, he headed outside. He paced in circles under the starless night and then made his way over to the loch. Standing there, he stared down at the glassy surface as if something could rise out of the cold water and tell him he had imagined every bit of it.

But it didn’t happen. This was the third night in a row that memories of his life as a wee one had kept him awake. One night he had dreamed of his mother, another night about his father. But this night’s dream had been the worst…

Hamish. He’d dreamed of Hamish. He sat down on a cold rock and relived all that he’d just experienced. There was no choice but to suffer through it again, for he believed it was all true.

This dream had been different from the others. While the dreams of his mother had been fleeting images and thoughts, sometimes just a smell, the nightmare of Hamish had been as detailed as if he had lived it.

He was quite sure he had. He’d just discovered why he could not recall how he had made it to Ayr.

The nightmare began in a small hut. The cottage had two rooms in it, and he was alone in one with Hamish. He could hear his father yelling at his fair-haired mother, but the only thing he recalled about his mother was that she was sobbing and saying “Please, Edward” over and over again.

He had no idea what she wanted, and he could not recall anything his father said, but what he did remember was that he ran through the door and told his father to stay away from his mother.

His father punched him in the face, his mother cried out, “Nay, Edward!”, and the next memory he had was riding in a cart. He woke up under a large blanket, the wheels of the cart hitting rocks and stones, bouncing him up and down. He peeked out from beneath the blanket to see where he was going. Hamish was riding the horse that pulled the cart, and he could see the moon overhead, the stars twinkling in the dead of night. When the cart finally stopped, he sat up and uncovered himself, only realizing his eye was swollen after he tried to brush the sleep from them. Poking his face in other spots, he realized his father’s fist had bruised him this time.

This time. Loki put his face in his hands trying to grapple with his thoughts. Had his father beaten him frequently at a young age? Never had Brodie Grant once raised a hand to him, and his uncles had never beaten their bairns either.

Loki forced himself to recall the details from the rest of the dream.

Hamish had pulled the horse into a clearing in the woods. After dismounting, he stalked to the back of the cart, grabbed Loki by the neck, and hoisted him out of the cart.

“Finally, I’ll do what I’ve always wanted to do with you, you wee wise arse.”

Loki didn’t say a word, but just stared at this man he hated.

“Your sire has finally had enough of your wise remarks and told me to do as I please with you.” He grinned at him. “You opened your mouth a few too many times, and you think you’re smarter that everyone else, do you not?”

Loki couldn’t help himself. He knew he shouldn’t say aught, but for some reason, he wanted the last word with this cruel man.

“‘Tis not hard being smarter than you, you piece of shite.”

It felt good to curse this man—so good that he smiled. He saw a familiar look in Hamish’s eyes—the blind fury that usually preceded his fist. The big man lifted Loki out of the cart and pummeled him, throwing him a good distance through the air. When he landed, Hamish stalked to his side, leaned over him, and whispered, “Your sire never wants to see you again, so I thought I’d enjoy taking your last breath, lad, but instead I’d rather have the animals feed on you.”

Then he strode away and left him there to die.

Aye, this dream was real—he knew it without a doubt. Tears streamed down his face. The memories were brutal, but it explained why Hamish and the earl had treated him so horribly. They’d always hated him, apparently threatened by the acuity of his mind. His own father had sent him off with a brute, and the brute had left him to die. For some unknown reason, his mind had protected itself from the painful memory for years.

After he brushed the tears from his face, he did the only thing he could do. He raced to the keep and made his way to his parents’ chamber. He sneaked inside, not wanting to wake his brother and sisters, for he had to see his Bella.

She was in his chamber, asleep, but as soon as entered the room, she rolled over and held her arms out to him. Loki climbed under the covers, and she gave him a questioning look, as if she suspected he’d been crying.

He placed his hand over her mouth and said, “Please, Bella. Can we not talk? I just need you desperately. Will you have me, my beautiful Bella?”

Bella nodded and he closed his eyes, sighing with pleasure as he helped her remove her gown. He kissed her deeply, stroking her tongue with his, trying to let her know how much she meant to him. Trailing his lips down her neck and across her chest, he took her nipple in his mouth and suckled her. She moaned and spread her legs for him as he reached down to the vee between her curls, only to find she was slick with need for him. He sighed as he sank into her sweet flesh.

“Bella, I love you. Promise me you’ll never leave me?”

“I promise, Loki. I love you, too. I was just dreaming about you.”

He moved inside her, a slow rhythmic tease that he wished would last forever. He slid all the way out before driving into her as far as he could, earning a guttural moan of delight from his wife—a sound that sparked him like no other. He so loved her passion. This time he watched her as he slipped out of her sweet passage and plunged deep inside her again. Her legs spread wide as she tried to take him in deeper, building a yearning inside him that threatened to explode.

“Faster,” she whispered, her breathing ragged as he reached underneath to clutch her sweet bottom and pull her closer. He caressed the softness of her cheeks until she groaned, then pulled out again and plundered her again, this time finally crossing the point of no return. He drove into her again and again, stroking her to a frenzy he’d never seen in her before. He gripped her hips and thrust into her until he felt her insides squeeze him, the sign she was about to go over the edge. He reached down and caressed her nub and she screamed, but he covered her lips with his, keeping her sounds from echoing into the night. As she tumbled into bliss, he followed her, just barely managing to keep from shouting for all to hear as he buried his seed inside her.

He loved Bella like no other.

Loki leaned his head against her cheek as he fought to level his breathing, feeling her hands as they rubbed his back.

“Loki?” she panted.

“Aye?”

“Are you all right?”

He paused to inhale the scent of her hair, her skin, his Bella. “Never better, love, never better.”

***

Bella wiped the sweat from her brow as she worked the bread dough in the kitchens. They’d been back a sennight, and she was still forced to live apart from her husband. She tired of the separation. The night he had crept into her bed had been one of their most special moments. He’d slipped out before dawn to make sure his sisters didn’t hear him, and the bed had seemed so huge and cold without him.

Once finished, she set the dough on the table, then made her way to the sink to wash some of the dishes. Nola, a lass much taller than Bella, started her usual taunting.

“Where’s your lad now, Miss Bella? I have not seen Loki sniffing your skirts in a while.”

“‘Tis none of your concern, Nola. Find someone else to tease.”

Nola grinned and her face lit up. “A wee bit sensitive about Loki Grant, are you?”

Bella set her hands on her hips, but reminded herself how often Nola played this same game. She loved to get someone’s goat about anything, and today Bella was her target. Determined to ignore the fool, she continued with her work, humming a tune that had been played by the last minstrel to visit the keep, refusing to make eye contact with the witch.

“I see he’s sleeping with the guards. I’ve heard he’s been dallying with lots of lassies.”

Bella did her best to ignore Nola. She could hear a couple of other kitchen maids snickering behind her. “Nola, I’m not interested in hearing about anyone’s whoring ways.”

“Nay, but we all know you’re in love with the lad. I heard you years ago when you promised to love him forever.” She chuckled and leaned against the broom she had, placing one hand on a generous hip. “Did you really believe that the laird’s nephew would lower himself so much as to marry a lass who works in the kitchens? You are a bit addled if you did.”

Bella closed her eyes, summoning the strength to ignore the lass. The other maids had started to gather around to watch the scene. Unfortunately, she had few friends in the kitchens, and the other maids tended to follow Nola around. Cook had gone to visit someone, so they were without supervision for the moment. Bella vowed to continue her work in silence.

“I heard he’s got one that hangs like a horse. What say you about that, whore? You’ve had it in your mouth, have you not? We all want to know.” Nola moved in so close that she stood within an arm’s reach of her.

There was a chorus of laughter and gasps from the other gathered maids, but Bella ignored them.

“Since you are no longer interested in the laird’s nephew,” Nola leaned down to whisper in Bella’s ear. “Mayhap I’ll swive him myself and show him what a real lass is like.”

That was the comment that toppled Bella over the edge. She moved so fast that Nola could not possibly have guessed what she had in mind. Bella leaned over as if to pick something up off the floor, but instead grabbed Nola’s left leg and swung it up in the air, forcing her to lose her balance and land flat on her arse. Suddenly, quiet descended on the kitchens as the other maids waited to see what would happen next.

Once Nola toppled to the ground, Bella fell on her and twisted her arm to hold her in place.

“You’ll mind your own business, do your work, and leave everyone else alone, especially my Loki.”

Nola whimpered as she stared up at Bella, moving nary a muscle. “Aye, I’ll stop, just as soon as you let me go.”

“I’m not ready to do that yet.”

“You’re hurting me, Bella. I’m going to tell Cook when she returns.”

“You sound like a wee lassie of five summers all of a sudden, Nola. Why the change?”

“You have my arm twisted and I cannot move. Leave me be.” Nola’s hands tried to release Bella’s grip, but she wasn’t able to budge her.

Nola had gone too far this time. Bella looked at the others, all of them staring at her as if she’d grown a pair of wings on her back. “You must promise to stop taunting others. We’re all here to work; we do not need your bossy ways.”

Nola nodded, gasping, “I promise.”

Cook came into the room and stopped short. “Bella? What in hellfire has happened here?”

Bella released Nola’s arm. “Naught, Cook. We just needed to settle something, and I believe we did.”

“Is that right, Nola?” Cook asked.

“Aye. All is settled,” she ground out. She took her time returning to a standing position and then she stomped away, rubbing her neck.

“Bella, why do you not go home for a couple of hours?”

Bella opened her mouth to argue, but then decided against it. Cook knew how the other lasses all taunted her because of her small size, and she’d been dealing with their torment for a while. Mayhap it would be best if she got away for a wee bit. Nola had upset her terribly.

The thought of loose women slipping into the guards’ sleeping chamber made her quite ill. She’d heard of others going after lads that way, but she trusted Loki, didn’t she?