Lonely Souls (6 page)

The smell of stocks, marigolds, and roses began drifting our way. A lot of the neighbors had already planted their boxes for the summer, and they really added something special to our street. My mom and I would probably have done that this weekend too. So many of our coven members lived on our street, and the sense of community was strong until recently. In normal circumstances, it was a lovely place to live.

“So I’m thinking that maybe you and I should work on figuring some of these things out about your mom. Possibly leave my mom and your aunt out of it,” he broke the silence that had been dragging us down from our house.

“You were thinking that too, huh?” I asked, noticing in the sunlight how much purple seemed to be in his blue eyes. It was the brightest blue I had ever seen. I thought he’d grow out of that eye color. Getting frustrated at how distracted I could get lately, I focused on the pavement in front of me, following the cracks with my eyes, thinking about what he said.

He stopped and waited for me to look at him again.

“I feel your mom’s disappearance is suspicious and like you said, if the police aren’t declaring anything, I don’t think we should either. I think my mom is overwhelmed with the loss of your mom, and she can’t handle the possibilities.”

“You know something else, don’t you? Will you tell me?” I asked, cursing myself for not holding his hand when he offered it.

“No, nothing concrete.”

He started walking again.

My phone started buzzing, and I grabbed it out of my pocket.

“It’s Trevor,” I sighed. I stopped walking, and I pushed the speakerphone.

“Hello,” I said, trying to sound upbeat.

“Hey, Triss. How are you doing with everything? I’m so sorry I wasn’t there. I had just landed in Arizona when I found out. I feel like a horrible person,” Trevor’s voice crackled over the speakerphone. He chose to go to ASU and was so sick of the Seattle weather, he already had an apartment rented the week school was out.

“That’s okay. I totally understand. You had no way of knowing,” I replied. “I appreciate the call though.”

I looked over at Logan and he seemed a bit distant. His eyes looked a little pained even. Nah, I’m sure I was exaggerating. He was probably thinking of our plan of attack.

“Did Jenny and Angela make it?” Trevor’s voice was hopeful.

“Uh, no they didn’t.” I started to finally get annoyed at the group of friends I suddenly didn’t seem to have any longer.

Logan looked at me, puzzled.

“Oh, wow. Now I feel even worse. I’m so sorry, hun,” Trevor said.

Hun?
He’s never called me hun before. It’s like I graduated from high school, and I’m suddenly put in this other weird category. I noticed Logan stiffen a little.

“Don’t worry about it. People are moving and getting situated in their college towns. I can’t expect them to drop everything for this,” I mumbled.

“Yah, you should!” Logan’s voice came out of the blue. Looking at him, his eyes were blazing mad. “What kind of friends do you have out here?”

“Who is that?” Trevor asked.

“Oh, he’s just a longtime friend from grade school, actually,” I spurted out, completely caught off guard and confused by the whole thing.

“Apparently the only friend who gives a crap too,” Logan mumbled and continued walking down the hill.

“Well, he’s right, Triss. I should have been there. We all should have been there.” His voice was soft.

“I honestly don’t blame you. I still don’t believe we should have had the memorial. She’s barely been declared missing, and the whole thing seems forced. I still think she’s going to walk through the door.” My voice perked up a little too much on the last word as if I was lying to myself. I wondered why I was making excuses for my friends. High school, in the whole scheme of life, was such a short time, there’s really nothing to tie these people to me. Maybe the friendships were more because of convenience rather than anything else. Oh my word. I’m totally overthinking things. I’m truly screwed up.

“Triss, are you still there?”

“Sorry, yeah! I gotta go. My friend is a lot farther down the street than I am, and you know how I can’t walk and talk on the phone at the same time. I appreciate you calling though.”

“Okay, Triss. I’ll call you soon, but please call me if you need anything.”

“I will.” I pushed the phone back into my pocket and jogged after Logan.

“Hey, wait up!” I yelled, thanking the skies above that I was running downhill and not uphill.

Logan stopped and turned around. He seemed to have calmed down, his hair looked a little more disheveled, like he’d been running his fingers through it in frustration, but he looked less tense.

“So none of your school or coven friends showed up to the memorial?” he asked in disbelief, reaching out to my hand, and this time, I let him grab it.

Suddenly, I realized that the anger in him wasn’t misplaced, but rather what a true friend might feel. I couldn’t afford to lose a friend like Logan.

I shook my head and found my eyes staring at anything but his. They were far too intense.

“I thought maybe because we missed the memorial before the gathering at your house that I had missed seeing your friends. But I had no idea that they just didn’t show,” he said quietly, his face tense.

“Well, a lot of them had plans to be moving or were on their way out of town or were already in another city,” I said, coming to their defense once more.

“I know we haven’t seen each other for years, but I’d never do that to you. I don’t care where I’m at in the world or what I’m doing, I’ll always be here for you, Triss.”

I started getting a little flustered. Are those words that a friend would speak, or was this more? I couldn’t take on anything right now. I couldn’t let him develop feelings, and I certainly shouldn’t either. I looked into his eyes, and I knew the answer. He wasn’t only coming from a place of friendship.

“Thank you,” I mumbled, and dropped my gaze from his. “I would hope I’d do the same for you.”

“I’m not getting my hopes up with your track record,” he laughed, not wanting to push it any farther than I was willing to go. “Once the letters stopped on your end, I knew I’d better make an appearance at least once more to get you to remember me.”

I tried my hardest to push aside the feelings that comment brought crashing down on me, but he had a point. We were stuck together like glue, until he moved away and then the bond completely disappeared, mainly because of me.

“I get it! I get it!” I told him. “But I would never forget you, Logan. I promise, if you write, I’ll write back.”

“Hopefully, I’ll be in the same town, and we’ll alleviate the potential issue in the first place,” he said winking. He squeezed my hand lightly, and the Seattle sunshine bounced off his blue eyes, creating a stir that was undeniable.

“So this is just a friend holding a friend’s hand?” he asked me, catching my reaction.

“Uh-huh. Sounds good to me,” I laughed, as we made it to the park that was packed with people. I was kind of relieved knowing that we wouldn’t be attempting any crazy heavy talks with this many mothers chasing around their toddlers.

But I was wrong.

We found a bench underneath one of the flowering plum trees out far enough where the three-year-olds wouldn’t be screaming directly in front of us. I normally loved kids, but right now, I seemed to need peace. A lot of things were shifting in my world.

“I know with everything going on, you probably haven’t thought about much,” he started. I could feel the warmth of his body begin to reach mine. I wanted to scoot in toward him more, but I scooted away instead.

“Very true,” I confirmed.

“Do you think you might stay in that house for a while?” he asked. I think I knew where he was going, and surprisingly, I was relieved.

“It’s paid off. I know that much. My mom was so excited when she paid our home off last year that we went on a trip to celebrate.” I smiled thinking about us both working out like crazy, getting prepared for a tropical beach trip. My mom’s idea of working out more didn’t involve the gym, just more hiking trips. “It kind of makes sense to stay. I’m sure my aunt wouldn’t agree, but I am eighteen.”

“Almost eighteen.” His smile did wonders for my spirit.

Smiling back at him, I let myself begin to relax a little, only a little, but it felt nice.

“Why do you ask?” I turned to him.

“Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea if we still stuck to the original plan. You know, with me moving in. I could keep an eye on you.” He smiled.

“On me?” I laughed. “More like the other way around. A guy like
you
needs to be watched.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” His eyes were wide with curiosity and dancing a little.

“Oh, please! I bet you’ve left a million girls back at your house ready to chase you down out here,” I teased him, hoping he’d reject the idea.

He never did.

“Speaking of that,” he avoided my feeble attempt at probing, “was that your boyfriend?”

“Who? Trevor? God no!” I shuddered at the thought.

“With the whole hun thing, I just thought—”

I interrupted him.

“That surprised me more than you, I’m sure. I think that’s the case of distance makes the heart grow fonder.” I smiled at him. “I know him too well to let that happen.”

“So you don’t have a boyfriend then?” his voice was a little gruffer than I expected.

“Nope. I’d say I never really have.” A flush began creeping up my face, and I had no idea where it was coming from. And why did I just tell him that?

“Maybe those letters did the trick then?” he said, and I started laughing.

“Doubtful. Now what plan are you busy devising?” I asked, leaning back against the bench, letting the warmth from Seattle’s June weather pierce through my clothes. Hearing the birds’ chirping and the kids’ playing began to make the wall I’d started building around my heart begin to crumble a little.

“Well, until we find your mom, I think you’ve got a lot to take care of, and I’d be more than happy to help however I can.” His blue eyes darkened a bit, and I wasn’t sure what he was thinking beyond the obvious.

I nodded and turned away, looking at anything but him once more. This was probably a really bad idea.

He found my hand that was gripping the edge of the bench and traced it with his finger. I did everything I could to ignore what the sensation provided.

“I’d still like to move in,” he said once more.

I turned to face him, and his eyes were penetrating mine, creating a stir in my belly that I knew I’d have to squash if he moved into my home.

“I think that sounds like a really good idea.” I surprised myself with the words that came tumbling out. “It would be a lot easier to try to track down everything with my mom, too, if you were under the same roof.”

“Aah, total business I see.” His lips pursed a little.

“Yes, total business,” I nodded. The wall around my heart was starting to go back up just how I liked it in recent times. “With that, do you know many protection chants?”

He looked disappointed, but I made myself brush away the guilt. I had too much going on and couldn’t jeopardize my mom’s safe return over a fleeting feeling that probably wouldn’t last more than a summer. Once he started college, he’d be off doing his own thing.

“Actually I do. I became intrigued with that side of things. Scared myself to death, really. Reading about black magic back in the day and its uses really brought things to my attention, so I brushed up on how to combat it.” He squinted at me, trying to gauge my reaction and then turned away.

I knew what he was telling me, without so many words. I was in shock. It didn’t seem possible, but I knew what he was implying, and he’d have no reason to lie about it. In order to fully fight the evil, a witch must learn that side of darkness. Silence was the only thing that filled the air between us. Looking at Logan, I never would have guessed it. He was busy staring down the street. He didn’t want to make eye contact with me either. The only thing that radiated from him was warmth and kindness the moment I laid my eyes on him back at the house. It was almost impossible to wrap my head around what he said.

“Does your mom know?” I finally blurted out.

He turned back to face me.

“What do you think?” he almost growled.

“Guess not,” I nodded. “You don’t—”

“Absolutely not. But I saw a side of things that I never wanted to believe existed.” He grabbed my hand, and this time, I let him.

“I’m sorry,” I replied, attempting to take my hand back, but he wouldn’t let it go.

“Everything you’ve read about is true, and it’s worse than what you’ve read. I guarantee it.” Making his point, he finally let my hand go.

“Well, the unfortunate part is that I haven’t read that much,” I paused. “Is that why you believe my story?”

“Yeah, that’s exactly why I believe it,” he nodded, his face solemn, “and why I want to help get your mom back.”

“So you believe she’s alive too?”

He nodded, his blue eyes searching mine. His lips parted, about to speak, but he stopped himself.

I felt like my world was starting to fall into place. I might not be crazy. My mom might actually be missing, not swallowed by the sea like everyone would love for me to believe. There’s a chance of getting her back. Tears began surfacing again, and I looked down at the grass immediately. After finding out what I did about Logan, I didn’t want him to think the person sitting next to him was a weakling. These tears would be a dead giveaway.

He pulled me to him unexpectedly and didn’t let go. His breath skimmed my neck, creating a shiver throughout my body. The sensation I had been trying to beat down started boiling up again. I hadn’t felt the beginnings of something like this for someone before, except for him years ago, but I knew I couldn’t start now. With every breath that he expelled onto my skin, I did my best to coat an extra layer of concrete around my heart to combat it. This was not a good idea and would never be. But why am I not moving away from him? The tears started to build up again, but I forced them back down. Crying would only confirm that I didn’t believe my mom was alive.