Long Shadows: The Lycanthropy Files, Book 2 (35 page)

“Fair enough. I don’t want to jeopardize your employment here. This is a huge house. Where are the rest of the people? Shouldn’t there be more servants? Administrators?”

She bit her lip for a few seconds before answering, and she spoke carefully. “This is only one of the houses on the island, and magic is helpful when it comes to easing chores. That is all I can say.”

“So this may be headquarters, but others don’t live here full-time. Interesting.”

“They are sensitive to each other, and so they like their privacy.”

I wondered just how much of that privacy was defensive so they couldn’t steal each other’s secrets. “Can you tell me what happened between Carrigan and Henry?”

Saraya shrugged. “I don’t see why not. Master Henry was dabbling in magic he shouldn’t have been, and Master Carrigan told him to leave or stop.”

“When was this?”

“About four and a half years ago, after Mistress Deirdre’s death.”

“Right.”
Perhaps Carrigan knew what Henry was going to do with Deirdre’s body and spirit but didn’t get to him in time.

Today Saraya laid out a plain white gown and sandals. “This is what Master Carrigan said for you to wear. It is an initiation dress. You must be doing well with your studies.”

“I suppose that’s one way to put it. I certainly know more than when I came.”

“And yet you look sad.” She wiped a tear from my cheek. “Do not be afraid. I’ve been told it doesn’t hurt, but it will change you.” She braided my hair in a simple plait down my back and tied it with a white ribbon. A knock on the door told me it was time to go.

“I hope I’m ready for this,” I said to Wolf-Lonna, but she was silent. What I’d feared my first morning there was true—they’d put the antipsychotic in something I ingested to block me from accessing my inner wolf. It seemed to work more quickly than previously, and I worried the stuff might be building up in my system with repeated dosing.

Oh, now they’re really playing dirty. I will find a way to get her back, and I will
not
let Henry win.

Henry blindfolded me and tied my wrists before we left the room. He tugged me along with a rope attached to the wrist ties.

“Just in case you get any ideas of making a run for it. I don’t feel like chasing you. Not that you’d get far,” he sneered.

I only lifted my chin and didn’t dignify him with a response.

He led me to the dungeon, all the while heckling me with comments like he was looking forward to stealing my will and breaking my spirit. My silence seemed to goad him into further revelation like, “And once I have control of you, I’ll be able to manipulate the werewolves, and then I’ll become leader of the wizards. We won’t have any more of this passive standing aside and letting humanity alone. They’ve mucked things up on their own for far too long.”

“Does your father know about your grandiose plan?” I had to ask.

“He’s getting tired and is ready to step down. Once he does, I can do whatever I want, and others will join me.”

I couldn’t answer because I had to focus on not tripping on the slippery steps down to the dungeon. The ties around my wrists hampered my ability to grab my skirt, and I stumbled on the hem and into the wall a couple of times. Finally we made it down the stairs, and I sneezed at the mildew smell.

“Blood is of the earth, and it’s easier for me to conduct my spells down here,” he said. “That’s how Father and I were able to take care of Max’s memories of you.”

“Why didn’t you just do this to begin with? You could’ve spared us all a lot of drama if you’d forced my change while I was unconscious.”

“Father wanted to wait and test you without any of my magic flowing in your veins. That was yesterday’s task. Today, you’re all mine.” He shoved me against the wall and licked my ear. I cringed away from him.

“Remember, I’ll make you want me, and I’ll make Max watch,” he said.

I took a deep breath to calm my fury, or at least compartmentalize it until I needed to use it. “Just get it over with,” I said. “I’m sick of your melodrama.”

A slap across my face made me bump the back of my head against the wall, and I saw stars.

“Henry!” Carrigan’s voice prompted relief in me for the first time. “Don’t abuse her. You’ll only ruin her for later. Fear and anger are stored in deeper parts of her brain.”

“Yes, Father.” He yanked on the rope binding my wrists, and I stumbled forward.

If fear and anger are stored deep, then passion could be as well.

Rough fingers removed my blindfold, and I blinked to clear the stinging tears. Max stood on the other side of a gurney. His skin was almost as pale as the white lab coat he wore, and droplets of sweat spread across his face as he moved with jerky motions.

“He didn’t want to help transform you, my dear, but something is compelling him.” Henry touched the vial on the chain around his neck, and Max doubled over like he’d been punched in the gut.

“Leave him out of this.”

“He betrayed us. This will only be the first part of his punishment.”

Max jerked back up, and his eyes held apology and sadness.

“It’s okay. I know it’s not you,” I said. He only managed a small inclination of his head, but I knew he understood me.

Henry and Carrigan untied my hands and strapped my ankles and wrists to a gurney so I lay flat on my back. I had only glanced at the ceiling before. It hadn’t been painted or tiled, but was left as the natural stone of the cave.

Cave…

The lights spun, and I knew I was on the verge of having a panic attack. I took deep diaphragmatic breaths to stop it, but then Max wheeled over an I.V. stand with a bag of clear fluid.

“This is to make sure I don’t dehydrate you,” Henry said. “Fluid in has to balance fluid out, no?”

“Don’t,” I murmured. Max put on rubber gloves, and my heart pounded in my chest. Both Henry and Carrigan wore lab coats, and I heard something crack, but I wasn’t sure whether it was internal or external.

A laboratory in a cave, strapped to a stretcher.

“No!” I thrashed around, my head and shoulders the only things I could move freely, and those just barely.

“Strap her down,” Henry said. After Max did, Henry commanded, “Maximilian, proceed.”

“Doctor Ragerman, proceed,” the Cabal researcher says. The tall redheaded man puts a needle in the vein in my arm.

Darkness flowed at the edges of my vision, my mind’s attempt to make me faint and not remember the trauma. I barely felt the prick of Max inserting the needle in my arm along with the electricity in his fingertips, even through his rubber gloves.

“She’s going into shock. Hold off on the extraction,” Max said, his hand lightly on my arm.

“Are you sure you’re not just trying to buy her time? I can feel there’s something going on. I can taste her fear and assure you we will proceed as planned.” Henry also rested a hand on my arm, the sensation like a snake poised to strike as it coiled on top of me.

“Killing her won’t do you any good.”

The needle goes in, and the researcher makes a check mark on his clipboard.

“Start the flow,” he says, and liquid fire spreads through my veins.

I looked up at the dungeon ceiling, noticing how it was different from the top of the cave in my memory, which flooded back, superimposed on it. My mind fought to shut the memories down, but then my aunt’s words come back to me.

It is in your moment of greatest peril that you will find your strength if you have the courage to take it.

Joanie had told me what they were doing in the cave, what they did to us, but my mind had lost it. Classic suppression, as Freud would say. I tried to bring the memories to the forefront, but my throat closed in panic. I had to breathe, to push through.
The chemicals they gave us forced us to… To hurt until the screaming made my throat raw.
I thrashed, half in the cave in the dungeon and half in the laboratory in the Ozarks, but I grasped at that little wisp of memory and followed it to the images from my nightmares. What were they doing to us?

“How long until the change in this one?” Ragerman says and steps back, his eyes fearful. “We’ve never done an adult before. I don’t even know if I got the dose right.”

“Just proceed as planned.”

Change? I’m thinking. What change? It’s all I can manage with the burning sensation seeping along my major blood vessels. Then when it hits my heart, I feel it. The tunnel opens up, and I fall through, and—

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Max released his hold on me like I burned him, and he fell to his knees, clutching his head, as did Henry, who moaned, “No, not yet. Don’t let her free, you fool! She wasn’t supposed to change so soon.”

The strap that held me down when I was a human caught my head, but I backed out and freed myself. As much as I wanted to go to Max, I knew I had to take care of Henry first.

“You have never killed a human before,”
Wolf-Lonna said, to my relief.

“He’s not a human, he’s a monster.”

“Still, you need my help, but you have to trust me.”

“It’s time to abort this experiment, Henry,” Carrigan said and released the safety on his gun. The sound echoed through the chamber and lengthened into the howl of the
Benandanti
.

Son of a…
I jumped off the gurney before Carrigan could get a clear shot at me. I relished how much more quickly I could move as a wolf and how lethal I could be.

“You’ve got two wizards with lethal intentions and one body,”
Wolf-Lonna pointed out.
“And the
Padre Superiore
likes their odds.”

“Fine, I accept you and me and all of this. I give you permission to be a full
fylgia
and protect me.”
Warmth seeped through my body, like what Deirdre had tried to do, but with love rather than hate and jealousy. I leapt on Henry, and he covered his face instinctively. I took advantage of his hesitation to rip the chain with Max’s blood off his neck and fling the vial to Max, who caught it.

Henry scooted back, the fear on his face apparent.

“Now who’s the hunted? Who’s going to get taken against their will while someone they love watches?”

A bullet grazed my flank and burned. The howling reached a triumphant note, but I didn’t allow it to distract me from my prey. Max stood and loosed a stream of electricity at Carrigan, who dropped the gun and fell back.

“Lonna, you know I didn’t mean it like that.” Henry held his hands in front of him.

I continued to close in on him and growled low in my throat.

“And how did you mean your promise to rape me, emotionally and physically? Don’t tell me you didn’t intend to hurt me. You don’t threaten and then bitch-slap the people you don’t want to hurt.”

“Lonna,” Max said. “This is like at your aunt’s place. Don’t let your animal side take over. We can seek justice now.”

“You have your memory back!”
I turned to him, and Henry inserted a syringe into my flank.

I spun around before he could depress the plunger. As much as I’m ashamed to say it, I allowed my animal instincts to take over and ripped Henry’s throat out. His skin tore more easily than any animal’s, but it was cold like a corpse’s. I swallowed as little as I could. Silver bullets whizzed by me and looked like little fireballs through my wolf’s eyes. I darted under a table and closed my eyes. Wolf-Lonna’s view took over, and—his bullets whizzing through her—she attacked Carrigan and finished him. The
Benandanti
fell quiet, but my ears still rang.

“Carrigan!” Max cried and went to his side. He closed his mentor’s eyes, and I looked away from the grief-stricken expression on his face. I put my head down on my paws.

“Max…It was self-defense, but I killed your alpha. I am so, so sorry.”

“They tried to kill
you
.” He said and sat beside me. He took the syringe out of my flank and threw it against the wall, where it shattered. “You have nothing to feel bad about, but please don’t be too harsh on Carrigan. Henry’s the one who toyed around with the blood magic and made Deirdre’s spirit stay instead of crossing over. He’s the one who corrupted himself by using it and tried to create a
vargamore
he could control. He’s been hunting you since the beginning, but you were too clever for him.”

“Carrigan helped Henry take your memories and tortured me about it.”

“I see that now. Carrigan worried about me. He didn’t want me falling for someone who he knew would have to go to Henry eventually.”

“For bad magic.”

Max nodded. “I’ll make sure our magic is only used for good from now on. For everyone’s good. Can you change back?”
 

“Give me a moment.”
I did as he asked and crossed my arms against the chill. He found a clean lab coat and gave it to me, and then he took me in his arms.

“I remember everything,” he said.

“I’m glad, although I wish I could take the memory of all this away.”

“No, because our memories are part of who we are like our wizard sides and your wolf side. Sometimes they’re hard to deal with, but they make us whole.” He looked into my eyes, and then he kissed me.