Lord of the Shadows (49 page)

Kirsh turned on Dirk angrily. “I've spent just about every waking moment since your eclipse never happened beating back unarmed innocents with swords and cavalry charges, Dirk! Don't you dare sit there looking blameless and talk to me about hurting innocents.”

“There
are
no innocents, Kirsh. Those people you've been riding down in the streets of Bollow and Talenburg are the same people who merrily fronted up to Landfall every year. The same ones who cheered and shouted while someone burned alive. The same people who willingly took the Milk of
the Goddess so they could do things at the Landfall orgy that any other day of the year they would be ashamed to admit they were capable of.”

“You keep telling yourself that, Dirk,” Kirsh sneered. “I suppose that way you can live with what
you've
done.”

“I can live just fine with what I've done, Kirsh,” Dirk told him. “Because what I
did
was do something about putting an end to it.”

ryk was at something of a loose end once Dirk left in such a hurry for Avacas, and in the weeks that followed he fretted constantly, fearful something might happen to change Kirsh's mind again. Caterina told him not to worry about it, but Eryk couldn't help himself. He had little in the way of duties with Dirk gone, and that left him plenty of time to imagine all sorts of dreadful things that might happen to his master. He didn't understand what was going on, but then hardly anybody seemed to know. The uncertainty of the people around him did little to ease his concern.

The Lord of the Suns' palace was still full of strangers. Lord Rees hadn't left yet, because Lady Faralan was so close to having her baby he feared the journey home to Elcast might precipitate the birth. Eryk had always liked Faralan, but she was obviously unhappy. He thought it must be because she was so uncomfortable, but he'd overheard her arguing with Lord Rees on several occasions. He didn't know what the fights were about, although Dirk's name had been mentioned once. All Eryk knew was their raised voices had been filled with anger and bitterness. It never used to be like that. Back on Elcast, when Faralan came to visit each year, she had been a happy, gentle soul and Lord Rees had really cared for her. Now they were separated by a gulf of hostility. Maybe things would get
better once the baby was born. Until then, Eryk resolved to stay out of Rees's way.

Claudio Varell eventually got fed up with Eryk moping around the palace and sent him to work in the kennels. Eryk liked the dogs and the handlers treated him with a degree of deference he was unused to. In the palace of the Lord of the Suns, Dirk Provin wasn't despised the way he had been in Mil after he left the pirates and went back to Avacas. Here in Bollow, among the Sundancers at least, Dirk was revered as the man who had exposed the Shadowdancers (although exactly
what
he'd exposed was beyond Eryk's comprehension) and they treated his loyal servant accordingly.

Nikolai, the kennel master, let him help care for an orphaned litter of puppies being hand-raised in the kennels. Eryk got to feed them and pet them and talk to them. But he was still lonely and feeling more than a little bit lost. He was in a strange country, surrounded by foreigners and not certain from one day to the next how his future would unfold. Eryk was never good at dealing with uncertainty so he spent a lot of time sitting on the floor of the kennels amid the pungent smell of the dogs, talking through his troubles with the puppies, who listened to him without complaint and nudged him affectionately whenever he seemed to need reassurance.

Caterina found him there, several weeks after Dirk left Bollow, explaining to a small speckled puppy about how things were always going wrong, ever since the mess he'd made of things with Mellie.

“Who's Mellie?” Caterina asked curiously, leaning on the fence with a quizzical expression. Eryk jumped with fright and then reddened with embarrassment, wondering how long she had been standing there listening to him. “Is she your girlfriend?”

“Not really. I wanted her to be, but she didn't …” He shrugged uncomfortably. “I made a mess of it.”

“Have you ever had a girlfriend, Eryk?”

He shook his head self-consciously. “Girls don't like halfwits. Not the nice girls, anyway.”

“I like you and I'm a nice girl.”

“But you're my friend. I'm talking about other girls. They think I'm dumb.”

“You shouldn't think that,” she scolded. “You're not so stupid. In fact, you have a great deal to recommend you.”

“Like what?” he asked skeptically.

“Well … for one thing, you're not cruel, Eryk. I had a friend in Tolace who married the best-looking boy in town and every time she did something he didn't like, he punched her in the face. I know which one I'd pick if had a choice between a handsome husband who liked giving me a black eye and someone who wasn't so pretty but cared for me. And you have a very good position—you're the Lord of the Suns' personal servant. Lots of girls would find that attractive.”

“Maybe,” he said doubtfully. “But I don't think it will make much difference to Mellie. She's a princess.”

“Then it's probably not her fault she doesn't love you, Eryk,” Caterina told him sympathetically. “The highborn aren't like
real
people. They get married to do deals and seal treaties and stuff. They don't even talk to each other properly. Look at Lord Dirk and Lady Jacinta! If they were like you and me, they'd be rollicking around in the hayshed by now. But they're highborn so they dance around each other all the time, being all polite and cagy. They never say what they really think, or what they really want. I feel sorry for them, actually.”

“I suppose,” Eryk agreed, not entirely convinced. “I just wish …”

“You're a good boy, Eryk. If I can see it, so will some other nice girl, someday.”

“But you wouldn't be my girlfriend, would you?”

Caterina smiled. “Are you asking me to be your girlfriend or just inquiring about the possibility?”

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing really,” she shrugged. “Come on. Brush that hay off your bum and tidy yourself up a bit. I came to fetch you back to the house. Prince Kirshov just arrived from Avacas and he wants to see you.”

Kirsh was in the morning room talking to Lord Rees when Caterina led him back into the house. The summons to meet Prince Kirsh worried Eryk a little. He knew things were tense between the prince and Lord Dirk and he was afraid Kirsh had come to deliver the news he'd changed his mind and had Dirk arrested again.

But Kirsh smiled when he saw Eryk. Caterina closed the door on her way out.

“Well, you seem none the worse for wear,” Rees remarked as he looked him up and down. “Still hanging off Dirk's every word and deed, I suppose?”

Eryk looked at Rees worriedly, not sure what he meant. His tone was anything but friendly. “Lord Rees?”

“Never mind.”

“Is something wrong, Prince Kirsh?” he asked, turning to the prince.

“Not that you need concern yourself with,” Kirsh assured him. “Dirk just asked me to check on you on my way through to Omaxin. He was afraid you'd think he's abandoned you.”

“Are you still mad at him?”

“A little bit.”

“You're not going to arrest him again, are you?”

Kirsh smiled but he didn't seem happy. Just … resigned. “Probably not. Things have changed a bit since we left Bollow. Misha's back.”

The news cheered Eryk considerably. “I like Prince Misha. He used to get really annoyed 'cause Dirk beat him at chess all the time, but he knew some really good stories and he didn't mind explaining things to me.”

“That sounds like Misha.”

“Are you going to stay for a while, Prince Kirsh?” he asked hopefully. “I could be your servant if you do. I haven't got much else to do with Lord Dirk away.”

“Only tonight, I'm afraid, Eryk. We just stopped in here to get fresh horses. I'm on my way to Omaxin to see my father and Marqel.”

“I miss Marqel,” he admitted. “She's one of my best friends.”

Kirsh seemed amused. “She's very fond of you, too, I'm sure.”

“Are you sure you don't need me to help, Prince Kirsh?” he asked eagerly. “I could, you know. I could even go with you.”

“To Omaxin?”

“Why not? There's nothing here for me to do. And if Lord Rees is going with you then I could be his servant, too, until you get back to Avacas.”

“I don't think so, Eryk,” Kirsh said doubtfully.

“
Please
, Prince Kirsh? Please, can I come with you? I'll be really good. I promise.”

Kirsh glanced at Rees. “What do you think, Rees?”

“I think he's Dirk's servant and he shouldn't abandon his post here without Dirk's permission,” the young duke replied.

“But he wouldn't mind, Lord Rees,” Eryk assured him. “Not if it was for you and Prince Kirsh. And it's not as if Lord Dirk needs me at the moment. Not while he's in Avacas doing… stuff.”

Kirsh smiled thinly. “Doing
stuff
? And what sort of
stuff
do you think Lord Dirk is doing?”

“I dunno.” He shrugged. “But it must be good.”

“Why must it be good?” Rees asked.

“ 'Cause Lord Dirk wouldn't do anything bad, would he, Prince Kirsh? I mean, I know what Tia said about him and all, but she was just mad at him for going back to Avacas.”

The prince looked at him with an odd expression and then glanced at Lord Rees. “Maybe I will let him come.”

“Why, for pity's sake?”

“At the very least, I'd be interested in hearing what Tia Veran and the Baenlanders had to say about Dirk after he left them.”

“Leave him here, Kirsh,” Rees advised. “You don't need the added burden.”

“I don't think Eryk will be a burden. He may even be useful.”

“Do you mean it?” Eryk asked excitedly. “I can go with you?”

“Sure,” Kirsh said. “Why not? I'm sure Dirk wouldn't
mind. In fact, if you prove yourself too good a manservant, young man, Lord Dirk may have to fight me to get you back, once we return to Avacas.”

Eryk frowned. “I hate it when you and Lord Dirk fight over stuff, Prince Kirsh.”

Kirsh's smiled faded. “Sometimes it can't be helped, Eryk.”

“But he's your friend.”

“Even friends don't agree on everything.” “But they should forgive each other,” Eryk told him sagely. “Lady Morna used to say friends were like brothers and they should always forgive each other because like brothers, when you lose a friend, he's not so easily replaced. Isn't that right, Lord Rees?” Eryk was proud of himself for remembering that little pearl of wisdom. He'd heard Lady Morna give that lecture to two of the grooms she caught in a fistfight. The boys had slunk away feeling very chastened by the time she was through with them.

Kirsh didn't seem impressed, though. “Did she also say friends shouldn't lie to each other?”

“No… but Lady Lexie said something.” Eryk smiled. He was rather warming to the idea he had a quote for every occasion. “She said it takes two people for a lie to work. One to tell it and one to believe it.”

Now Kirsh looked confused. “Who is Lady Lexie?”

“Mellie's mama.”

“And who is Mellie?”

“Mellie Thorn. She lived in Mil.”

Kirsh stared at him for a moment, clearly shocked. “Mellie
Thorn
? Johan Thorn had a daughter?”

“I suppose. Her papa was dead, so I never met him. But Lady Lexie was her mother. She was really nice. I don't know what happened to her after Mil was destroyed, though. I hope she's all right. I think Mellie must be safe, though, 'cause she left with Tia and Prince Misha before you got to Mil … Is something wrong, Prince Kirsh?”

The prince shook his head. “No. Nothing's the matter, Eryk. I'm just surprised, that's all.”

Rees looked at Kirsh with concern. “Dirk never mentioned Johan had another child?”

Kirsh shook his head. “Misha never mentioned it, either.”

“Can I really come to Omaxin with you, Prince Kirsh?”

Kirsh nodded distractedly. “Why don't you run along, Eryk, and get your gear packed. We're leaving before second sunrise tomorrow.”

“You won't be sorry you let me come, Prince Kirsh,” Eryk promised.

“I'm sure I won't be,” Kirsh agreed.

Eryk sketched a hasty bow and fled the room excitedly. He couldn't wait to tell Caterina he was going to Omaxin with Prince Kirsh and Lord Rees; he couldn't wait to see Marqel again.