Love Engineered (22 page)

“Yes. And they are together again now.” She swallowed a sob.

“Do you think we shall ever love anyone in that way?” he asked.

Jane hesitated.

“What is it?”

“I . . . I do love someone that way, Charles.”

“Boyd?” He breathed out.

Jane dipped her head a little.

“It's no great surprise,” Charles said. “I see I shall have to have words with him. When will he ask you to marry him?”

“He already has. We are engaged. We have been for the last few months. He asked me the night before mother died, and of course, during this time of mourning he couldn't speak to you to ask your permission, even if it's only a formality.”

“He has done the right thing. He honours mother by not speaking to me before now.”

“When shall I tell him to speak to you?”

“Tell him to come tomorrow. But I'm not sure I shall give my permission,” he said with a smile. “I shall have to find out if his work prospects are good enough for you.”

This small attempt at humour lifted the previous heaviness they shared and shortly afterwards they left their mother's room. But before they parted to go to their respective chambers, Jane suddenly said, “Mother always denied it but you were her favourite. She always had high hopes for you.”

“I think I exceeded her expectations with the work I have done.”

“Not just that, she hoped you would marry well too.”

A querying look made Jane continue. “She said once that she hoped you would marry Miss Thomas. But we both know that will never happen. Well, good night.”

“Good night,” he said, closing the door to his bedroom and sitting on the bed.

Jane's words explained much of his mother's behaviour on the few occasions they had all been together with Miss Thomas. His mother had often tried to pull him into conversations she was having with her, and then there was the time at the assembly. He had noticed them talking and looking at him and, though he couldn't hear what they said, he wondered if his mother had encouraged Miss Thomas in her affections. Or led her to believe that he felt something for her in return.

No. It was absurd. His mother would never interfere in that way. All the time leading up to their argument, he had stated many times to his mother that he didn't like Miss Thomas in that way. He was sure he had.

But now, after all this time, he found he didn't dislike her. He would be happy to see her again when she was next in town. He wondered why she didn't come. She corresponded with Jane frequently, yet Jane didn't ask to visit her in Devon.

His earlier slumber in front of the fire had refreshed him and he no longer found himself able to sleep. He had been troubled by some of the words written in the letter by his father. “You're all I think of,” it had said. Well, if thinking of someone all the time meant you were in love, then he was most assuredly in love. He denied it, suppressed it, his mother's death delayed his admission. But Louise's words read out by Jane had touched him. He could imagine her voice speaking them. The crumbs that Jane provided only served to make him want to know more of what she wrote. Had she mentioned him? Was she well? When was she next to visit London? He started off downstairs intending to see if Jane had left the letter there, but then halfway down stopped and scolded himself for even thinking about reading someone else's letter. He returned to his room. The woman was making him act in an irrational way.

Sitting alone, he now realised he couldn't bear to go through life without her. So, this was what it was like to love, to passionately love someone. He wished Jane and Boyd well. She deserved happiness. Could he have his own?

But all he could think of now were her words that night at dinner: “If I ever fell in love and was rejected thus, I would quickly forget the gentleman and look to the future with the support of true friends.”

And any hope that she still loved him was utterly and completely extinguished.

News of the engagement between Jane and Boyd reached Devon quickly. Jane hadn't told anyone of her betrothal before now. She thought it inappropriate to tell even her closest friends until Charles had been spoken to. But with her brother’s permission, she announced it to all her friends and acquaintances. Louise, although not surprised at the match, decided she must forgive Mr Boyd for any previous offence for Jane's sake. They would make a handsome pair. Besides, Mr Boyd was still occasionally sending her anonymous gifts to make up for his error. That was admirable.

Edward was happy to see his sister suitably matched, and welcomed his future brother-in-law into the family. Jane didn't want to wait any longer than necessary for the marriage to take place. She was painfully aware, amidst all of the fuss that inevitably surrounded such an event, of Charles's sadness at parting with his sister so soon after the loss of his mother. However, she was mistaken that her brother's recent melancholy was due to her departure to another household. For although he would miss his sister, there was another reason. One he didn't speak about to anyone.

In the two months that led up to the wedding, he had fallen more in love with Louise Thomas than he would have ever thought possible, and all without seeing her once. His silent moods and sometimes fractious temperament had been sparked by the frustration of knowing not only that he had squandered the chance of marrying the woman he now loved so dearly, but that he had caused her so much pain.

He often found himself thinking about the time he had spoken so offensively, and the pain only subsided when he thought about those few seconds during which she took his hand in hers and declared her love. Then how forgiving she was afterwards. How he wanted to turn the clock back and have that time over again; how differently he would behave now!

He only wished there was a way he could make amends for everything he had said. His only prospect was that she was to attend Jane's wedding. All his hopes must hang on the short time he would have then. To do what, he didn't know. For he wasn't the sort of man who knew how to court a lady's attention. Famous engineer that he was, underneath that skill was just a man who couldn't fathom the opposite sex.

Any time that he found himself in a social situation, he would watch and listen to how gentlemen spoke to and courted ladies. Several times he observed suave, smooth speaking men as they deftly complimented their female companions. The response was usually fluttering eyelashes and giggles. But he wondered how he could ever contrive to say such things. It just wasn't in his nature.

Would Miss Thomas respond like that? No, she was more subtle and sensible. But he would hope he could provoke some sort of response from her.

. . .

Louise looked across the table at Mr Brunel. They were seated in the lounge area of the Institution of Civil Engineers. There was no one about, it being the weekend. Louise perched on the edge of her chair. Brunel sat back, relaxed and totally at ease. He removed the cigar from his mouth.

“It's clear to me you must replace your tenants’ roofs with lead instead of thatch. That will stop the fires, or at least stop many of them. There are other materials available, but they are more expensive than lead -”

Louise interrupted him. “I'm assured that the walls of most of the houses will not take the weight of the lead. But more importantly, the master thatchers will get very upset.”

Brunel shook his head. “Of course they don't want their livelihood taken away. Understandable. But change comes and they must learn to adapt. You're their mistress, they are your tenants. They are your houses. You must do what you consider to be best and they must live with it.”

“It seems to be an impossible situation.”

Brunel put the cigar back in his mouth and raised his eyebrows. “Indeed.”

They said nothing for a few moments until Louise broke the silence. “Thank you for seeing me today, I shall think about your advice and do what I can to follow it.”

He nodded. “Write to me again if you need further help.”

“I will. You know me well enough to know I will.”

Louise heard footsteps on the polished wooden floor behind but took no notice. Then she heard someone call her name.

“Miss Thomas?”

They both looked up. A familiar face looked back at her. He wore an inquisitive frown on his face. With her back to the entrance, she hadn't seen him arrive.

It was Charles Lucas.

She had of course prepared herself for this inevitable meeting, now that she was in London once again, but she was a little taken aback that he was so suddenly in front of her after all this time. She hadn't expected to see him for another few days – not until Jane's wedding. She composed herself, however, and let him take her hand in his outstretched one for a few moments.

“Mr Lucas. How unexpected. You know Mr Brunel?”

The two engineers acknowledged each other with a curt nod.

“It's I who should say it's unexpected to see you. But I suppose you being here is not so unlikely. Are you well, Miss Thomas?”

“Yes, very well. Thank you.”

“I'm glad.” He looked down at her. His face was serious. “Have you seen Jane yet?”

“No. But I will see her this afternoon. She is coming to tea and I'm eager to see her,” she replied, with an air of forced coolness.

“She is longing to see you too, and glad you're here for her wedding. You do her a great honour by attending.”

“Thank you.”

“When did you arrive in London?”

“Yesterday.”

“It was an easy journey?”

“Yes.”

Brunel coughed and they both looked over at him. “If you have no other questions for me, Louise, I will leave you two alone.”

“Of course,” she said.

Brunel heaved himself out of the chair, kissed Louise's hand and left. They watched him go, and then Charles turned to Louise.

“You were here to meet with him?”

“Yes. He has been helping me with some estate matters.”

“Really?”

“Yes, roofing materials in the main, and some other things.”

Charles's face darkened. “I'm sure his advice was excellent, but I would have been more than happy to assist you and answer any questions you may have had. I'm disappointed you didn't think of coming to me.”

Louise looked away for a moment, then said boldly, “I did think of coming to you, but I thought you might find it petty.”

His shoulders dropped. “Yes, I suppose you would think that, wouldn't you? But you do me an injustice – since seeing Glazebrook firsthand I now understand your worry over it. Besides, I thought that day we agreed to start afresh.”

“Yes we did, but I didn't realise that also meant your views on estate matters had changed.”

“They have.”

“Oh,” Louise said.

“Will you promise to come to me, and not Brunel, the next time you need advice?”

His gaze was fixed on her face and she felt a little odd. Brunel had helped her family for years. But this was him.

Before Louise could answer, she glimpsed Lord Philip by the doorway. “Are you ready Louise? I'm eager to get going,” he said.

“Excuse me Mr Lucas, I must be going.”

“Of course.”

She took her leave and Lord Philip offered his arm. “You seem to have kept your composure while meeting that gentleman again. Wasn't he the one who caused you much trouble last year?” Philip asked once they were outside.

“Yes. But he has apologised and I have forgiven him. It's his sister whose wedding I'm attending.”

“Ah. Of course. Nothing like a wedding to get the gossips talking about another. I try and avoid them myself these days – get too fed up with people asking me when I'm going to tie the knot.”

“When are you going to marry, Philip?” she asked with a smile.

“Why, the day you accept me, Louise. And not a day sooner,” he replied in jest.

“It looks like we're both going to remain unmarried then.”

. . .

That evening, as soon as he arrived home, Charles enquired after Jane's afternoon visit to Miss Thomas.

Jane's face was animated. “It was wonderful to see her again. She looked so well. The Devon air seems to bring out a wonderful glow in her complexion. I'm sure she looks younger than I have ever seen her.”

Charles couldn't help thinking the same. Louise was more beautiful than he remembered. “So your friendship is as strong as ever?”

“Yes. We talked for hours, I hardly know what about. But that is the great joy, time flies when I'm with her!”

“You should invite her to dinner before the wedding. There is still two weeks.”

“I already did. But she does not have an evening free the whole time. I was disappointed, but she has promised to see me during the day whenever I choose.”

“You do not think it's because she wants to avoid Boyd?”

Jane paused for a moment. “No, no. I'm sure it's not that. He told me about his error. I spoke to her about it, and she was adamant that she wasn't offended and he didn't mean to be malicious. She simply said she had previous engagements that couldn't be cancelled. I didn't ask with whom; it would have been rude. Besides, it's none of my business. She told me they were all formed well before she arrived in London. If I had known I would have asked her before but I'm a little upset she didn't think about keeping an evening free for me.”

Charles knew that she had been offended by Boyd's remarks, and couldn't blame her for wishing to avoid him, but it was inconvenient. For him at least. He wanted to see her too, to spend time with her. He wanted to show her how he felt about her. If earlier in the day was anything to go by, he had much work to do.

He was finding it increasingly difficult to think of anything else but her. It was unlikely that he could he see her during the day as his work kept him busy, and with the wedding approaching there were more things to occupy him in the evening.

The wedding day arrived and all the last minute details were arranged. However, it wasn't the bride who was to be the most admired, by one set of eyes at least. As Charles walked into the church with his sister, all gazes fell on Jane. Charles, who never usually took much note of a woman's gown, thought Jane was resplendent in her white satin (without too much frippery) and he was proud to lead her up the aisle. At the first chance, as he led his sister up the aisle, he surveyed the congregation, and his gaze locked onto Miss Thomas. There she was, on the left, the bride’s side of the church. He could only see the back of her head, until she turned to see the bride, and her full beauty was once more for an instant shown to him. He dared not look at her for more than an instant, but it was long enough for him to wish that a different wedding was taking place.