Love Me Always (28 page)

“No, no, young lady. Don’t be telling me stories. You are in your tenth and fourth year, so don’t think you are going to pull my leg with your fibs.”

Nick tugged on her arm and motioned with his head for her to come to the corner of the room with him. She followed. When they were far enough away from Grant, Nick shook his head.

“I think he’s lost his mind. When he talked to me earlier this morning, he talked as if I were still a young boy. Kitty, I think this illness has made him lose some of his memory.”

She sighed heavily. “I’ve noticed this lately, too, but then he’d come back to the present and everything would be all right.” She paused, then asked, “Now what do we do?”

His arms slid around her shoulders, bringing her closer to him for a hug, but only a loose one. “We’ll have to play along. There’s nothing else we can do.”

Her heart quickened, but she couldn’t let this comforting hug get out of control. Reluctantly, she pulled away. “All right. I’ll do it.”

For the rest of the day, Grant floated in and out of his memories of yesteryear, and everyone in the household went along. It was especially hard for Gregg and Ian and they left the room quite a few times with eyes filled with tears. Nick had tears, also, but bore it with his head held high.

Catherine only had a hard time when guilt overrode her feelings, which was quite a bit. Why couldn’t she have shown Grant more love? She’d promised Nick to make his uncle happy, but she’d failed because of her selfishness.

She took breaks during the day to rest or just to be by herself, riding her horse around the estate. She wasn’t the only one who needed this private time because she saw Gregg and Ian out at different times during the day as well, but Nick would not leave his uncle’s side.

After the dinner meal, she decided it was time to go upstairs and force Nick to take a few moments to be by himself. Gregg and Ian told her they weren’t planning on visiting with their uncle yet, so she decided to make Nick leave for a while.

She entered the room quietly and walked toward Nick. He still sat in the chair beside the bed, still in the same position he was earlier. The only thing different was his body shook with silent sobs. Standing in front of him, she touched his shoulder. He didn’t look up, but wrapped his arms around her waist, burying his face against her as he cried.

She threaded her fingers through his long, raven black hair as she held his head. He held her tighter. Tears formed in her eyes and a lump grew in her throat.

“Nick?” she whispered in a tight voice. “You really need to be by yourself for a while.”

When his crying ceased, he pulled away and looked up at her. “He’s now back to when my father was still alive.”

“Oh Nick, no.” She caressed the side of his face lovingly, wiping away the tears from his cheeks.

“He thinks I’m a young boy, and he wants to talk to my father. I don’t know what to tell him.”

“Are you going to be all right?”

He took a deep breath and released it before nodding. “Yes. It’s just hard to see him this way.”

“I know. That’s why I want you to get away for a little while. It will do you a world of good. I promise.”

He stood closely in front of her. His hands had been around her waist but he moved them up over her arms, her shoulders and neck to the sides of her head as his thumbs gently stroked her skin. “You’re the only thing I need right now.” He bent his head and brushed his lips gently across hers in a soft kiss, then pulled away slightly. “But I do need a few minutes to be by myself. I won’t be very long, I promise.”

His words and the kiss enchanted her...and may the Lord strike her down, because she wanted more because of it. “No, really Nick. Take all the time you need.”

He kissed her once more, making this one slightly longer. She leaned into him and participated fully. Before she could enjoy it too much, he stepped away.

“I won’t be able to go very long without wanting to be near you again.”

“All right. I’ll be here.”

He gazed into her eyes for a few more minutes, then finally turned and left the bedroom.

She loved him so much. How could she leave him after Grant died? But she’d been selfish for too long. Nick needed a wealthy woman of nobility. She wasn’t that woman and never would be.

Chapter Sixteen

Grant slept the whole time Nick was gone. Sitting in the same chair Nick had been in, Catherine stared at the man who’d been her parents’ best friend for as long as she could remember, and her heart cried for him. Why did death have to be so hard? True, he’d meet his maker a different way than her mother had, but the heartache was still very real. She wished he’d open his eyes so she could give him a proper farewell. Not as the woman he’d wanted to marry, but the girl who’d adored him for many years.

When the bedroom door clicked open, she wiped away a stray tear. Nick walked in wearing a fresh shirt and pressed trousers. He came to her and pulled her out of the chair. Wrapping his arms around her, he gave her a tender hug.

“I missed you.”

She laughed lightly. “Oh, Nick. You weren’t even gone for a whole hour.”

He pulled back slightly and gazed into her face. “No, I mean I have missed you these past few days.” He stroked her cheek. “I know you missed me, too. Tell me, Kitty. Admit it.”

“Indeed, I have, but—”

“Shhh,” he hushed her as his finger touched her lips. “There are no buts. Not anymore.”

“This cannot be right between us, Nick.”

“Maybe not now. But soon.”

“We shouldn’t think that way.”

“Why? I believe he wants to die now. I believe he’s giving up on his life now so we can be together – the right way.”

Catherine couldn’t believe what he was saying. Her heart burst with happiness, yet at the same time she worried it was too soon to feel such joy. After all, she wasn’t the woman he should marry. She could never offer him a large dowry, and she certainly didn’t come from a family of wealth.

“Kitty? Why are you so quiet? Don’t you love me any longer?”

Her heart melted as she gazed into his narrowed eyes. She should let him know she loved him, but love wasn’t enough. Not this time. When she went to speak, the bedroom door opened and in walked Gregg and Ian, startling her and making her jump out of Nick’s arms.

Ian acted like he didn’t notice the two embracing, but Gregg’s gaze shot daggers at Nick, and Gregg barely looked at her.

“How is our uncle doing?” Gregg snipped.

Nick stepped to the bed and looked at Grant. “He hasn’t changed, except for the fact that every time he wakes up, he’s a little further back in time.”

Gregg and Ian walked to the side of the bed and sat beside their uncle. “How long did the doctor say until he dies?” Ian asked, in a choked voice.

“The doctor gave no indication, but did say it would be soon,” Nick answered. “The disease in our uncle’s body is taking over fast.”

Catherine stood back away from the brothers. Shame and guilt crept through her. She’d been caught in Nick’s arms while the man she was supposed to marry lay dying. Gregg had noticed the look of love on her face a moment ago. Yet he knew how she felt, so why did he scowl so?

She still didn’t feel part of this family, especially now. Perhaps, she’d leave the brothers to be alone with their dying relative. As she turned to leave, Nick grasped her arm. His eyes pleaded with her to stay, and she couldn’t turn him down.

He pulled on her hand and she moved by his side. Sliding his arm around her, he held her in a friendly embrace, which made her feel a little better. She relaxed slightly and leaned against him as her arm slipped around his waist for support.

There was nothing said after that and the room remained quiet, except for the few times Grant moaned in pain. Nick comforted her more than anyone could, and now as she watched Grant die, she was happy for the support from the man she loved.

* * * *

Catherine awoke the next morning feeling cramped, yet she was in somebody’s arms and didn’t want to move on the heavily cushioned sofa. As she lifted her head, she opened her eyes. Nick snuggled against her. Across the room, Grant lay in bed. She glanced around the room, and luckily, Gregg and Ian were not present.

Looking back at the handsome man beside her, she smiled at his sleeping face. He was such a brave, strong, wonderful man, and she was so happy to be in love with him. Last night he didn’t let her out of his reach the whole time Gregg and Ian were in the room. He kept asking her if she were all right or if she needed anything. He was so caring and it made her fall deeper in love with him. She shouldn’t have allowed it but couldn’t stop it from happening.

She stayed awake last night until after the two brothers left to retire for the night, and weariness had taken her over. Nick had taken her over to the sofa and sat beside her, and within time they fell asleep.

It was so nice to wake up in his arms, and she’d cherish this moment forever – even after he married another woman and went on with his life. Slipping out of his arms as not to wake him, she stood and stretched her aching body before going over to check on Grant. He was deathly pale. Her heart dropped and she rushed to his side. His chest rose and fell in a ragged rhythm. She let out the air she
hadn’t realized she’d been holding.

She sat next to him and softly touched his cheek. He jerked, which in turn made her jump also. His eyes fluttered open, but she knew he couldn’t see anything anyway.

“Catherine? Is that you?”

Her heart sped up. This was the first time he’d known who she was since his attack. “Yes, Grant. It is I.”

He smiled. “How long have you been here?”

“Since yesterday morning.” She continued to caress his frail face. “How do you feel?”

His smile disappeared. “I’m in a tremendous amount of pain. Is the doctor here? I need him to give me some more laudanum.”

“He’s probably still asleep. I shall fetch him. I put him in one of the extra bedrooms for the night.” She moved to leave, but his hand grasped hers, stopping her.

“Catherine, my dear? Stay one minute longer. I want to remember the feel of your touch before I die.”

“Oh, Grant.” Her voice broke. “Don’t say things like that. I don’t want you to die.”

“Now, now, my precious darling, don’t fret. I have lived a good life and I’m ready to meet my maker in peace. I want to let you know that even though our engagement was very short, I was extremely happy the whole time, especially lately.”

“Please forgive me for not loving you the way you wanted.” Her voice shook.

“There’s nothing to forgive. I just hope after I die, you’ll be able to put all of your anger and hurt feelings aside and start a new life. I hope you’ll forgive me for all I’ve done.”

“But, Grant, there is nothing to forgive.”

He squeezed his eyes shut and held his breath. His body stiffened as if another wave of pain washed over him. A minute passed by before he was able to breathe normal again. “Catherine, fetch the doctor for me.”

“Yes, Grant.” She hurried out of the room, her heart a little lighter than before, knowing he held no ill feelings against her.

* * * *

When the bedroom door clicked close, Nick awoke with a start. He jumped up and looked around. Catherine wasn’t here, so he assumed she’d been the one to leave. He glanced at his uncle’s bed. A painful expression creased his aged face. He rushed to him. “Uncle Grant?”

Grant breathed slower. “Nick, is that you?”

“Yes. Are you all right?”

“I’m as well as could be expected for a dying man, I suppose.”

Nick thanked God his uncle had returned to the present time. Nick almost cried out in relief, but the knot in his throat stopped him. “Did Catherine leave to get the doctor?”

“Yes.” Grant blindly reached out his hand and felt around for Nick’s,
touching it, then grabbing onto it tightly. “Nick? Before they get here, I want to tell you something.”

“What?”

“First, I want to thank you for all you’ve helped me with. I know some of the things I have asked of you have been despicable and you probably think I was half-insane for asking, but because you’re a good nephew, you have done them obediently. But before I die, there’s just one more thing I want you to do for me.”

“Anything, Uncle Grant.”

“I know how much you care about Catherine. I know you’re in love with her, although you don’t want to admit it to me. I also know she’s in love with you.” He chuckled lightly. “I may be blind, but I can still see. I want you to take Catherine as your wife after I die. Don’t make the same mistake I made and marry the wrong woman just because she’s wealthy. I want you to marry the woman you love.”

Tears gathered in Nick’s eyes, the lump in his throat thickening. His heart burst with happiness and he wanted to cry aloud. “You are giving me your blessing?”

“Yes. I know you two will be happy together. Hopefully, within time you and Catherine will be able to forgive me for keeping you apart for so long. I know society will disapprove, but they don’t matter. You don’t need to live a lonely life like I did. Follow your heart Nick, and marry Catherine.”