Love Realized (38 page)

She wondered how quickly the firemen swept the floors to clear it for fire? She was on the second floor, so they only had to methodically sweep the first floor, and then they would get to her. Thinking that wouldn’t take too long was comforting, but how much blood could she lose before it affected the baby.

“Shit!” she declared as she rolled to her right side, putting her left shoulder higher and above her heart in an attempt to stop, or at least slow, the bleeding. The movement caused pain to shoot through her shoulder and down her left arm, once again taking her breath away with its severity.
Come on Gillian, you need to get up, and sit your ass up against the wall! You need to get the wound above your heart to slow the bleeding.

Her mental pep talk had her moving. Using her right hand, she pushed on the floor. This allowed her to get herself up onto her hands and knees, which only helped her see how much blood she had lost. Just the site of the amount of blood she had lost zapped a little more of her energy.

“This isn’t good,” she said out loud to herself as if hearing herself talk was going to help. But strangely it did. She began to talk out loud to herself, encouraging herself to move, to get up, to survive. “Just get your ass against that wall, Gillian!” she growled to herself as she plopped her butt down on the ground. She couldn’t risk trying to stand up because if she moved too quickly, with her blood pressure likely being very low, she would be at risk for passing out completely, and then she would definitely bleed out.

In this upward position, she felt a bit lightheaded and knew she needed to get to the wall for support. The only way to accomplish this was to push herself with her feet toward the wall, scooting on her bottom. The first push had her sliding across the puddle of her own blood. The wetness was still warm and gave her a disturbing feeling as she accepted the fact that there was a lot of blood on the floor.

“Good, this will work.” Once again cheering herself along, she repeated the movement with her feet over and over, which brought her closer and closer to the wall. All the while she tried to assess what she needed to do next. As she continued to push herself across the floor, she noticed the warm wetness of blood trailing down her back from the exertion. There was blood on both her front and her back. She had expected this on the front, but hadn’t expected it on the back. “The bullet must have gone straight through then,” she mused out loud as she paused for a moment before pushing again. This was good because there was no bullet just hanging out inside her body causing trouble. And it was bad because that meant she had to try and apply pressure to both wounds. “Fuck!”

The wall. She really needed to get to that wall. If she could lean against it, and apply pressure from the front, that should be sufficient to stop the bleeding. She pushed with her feet one last time when she felt her back hit the wall. She made a straining and painful attempt to move her left shoulder against the wall, which in turn, took her breath away. Trying to slow her breathing down because she was getting even more lightheaded, she made an attempt to apply pressure to the front of her shoulder and push it back into the wall. “Fuck!” she yelled again into the empty corridor.

She could feel the wetness of her scrubs and the sting of the wound itself as she pressed her shoulder completely back. Raising her right hand again to the wound in the front of her shoulder, she pushed it back in to the wall as hard as she possibly could. It was certainly becoming more of a challenge since her limbs were starting to get heavy and take on a resemblance to gelatin.

“Now what do I do?” she again asked herself out loud. Maybe the firemen weren’t too far from where she was. “Help! Is anyone there?” she called out in hopes that maybe someone would be nearby. Could tell which fire alarm was pulled? If they knew which one was pulled, they could just go directly to it. Logic would tell you that if an alarm was pulled, the fire had to be in sight of that particular alarm, didn’t it? All she could do now was wait. With her right hand applying pressure to her left shoulder, she made the painful attempt to get her left hand into her lap. Crying out loud as the pain once again shot through her shoulder and down her arm, she got her left hand up and cradled it around her stomach. This helped take some of the strain off of her shoulder.

Gillian looked down at her left arm across her lap and noticed how it was cradling her abdomen from one side to the other. It looked like the position an arm would be in to hold a baby. As the tears began to well up in her eyes, she thought to herself that she
was
holding a baby. She was holding her and Jake’s baby. The tears started to overflow from her eyes, and she whispered, “I'm sorry, little one... I'm so sorry.” She closed her eyes and leaned her head back against the wall to wait, holding her abdomen as tightly as she possibly could with her weak useless arm.

Jake was sitting on the bench outside the entrance to the hospital waiting for the boys to come down with Gillian. He hated that she seemed upset or distracted by something last night. He couldn’t be one hundred percent sure what was the cause of it, but he only hoped that it wasn’t him. Being around a woman like Gillian could be equal parts funny and frustrating as he tried to figure out what was wrong with his girl and attempt to not be the cause of it. Clearly, Gillian was upset about something and while he didn’t know what it was, he was going to do whatever he could to make her happy until he could figure it out. He had thought about asking Allie about it since he knew she was over yesterday, but he felt that was almost like cheating. It was his job to make her happy, and he wasn’t about to take a short cut. Not yet at least.

The thought of that little blue bag, which contained that infamous little blue box with the ribbon around it that was stuffed inside his sock drawer made him smile. Maybe he should just propose sooner rather than later. No, he wanted to plan it out, and he wanted to wait and do it in a memorable way. It would mean more to the both of them that way. He wanted to propose, was going to propose, and he wasn’t going to take no for an answer, but he wanted the memory of it to be a powerful one. A big smile spread across his face as he thought about Gillian as his wife.

His thoughts were suddenly interrupted by the sound of the fire alarm going off. He reflexively jumped to his feet and was met by the crowds of people making their way out of the building to escape whatever it was that set the alarm off. Jake knew for a fact that these alarms go off frequently, but a sinking feeling overtook him, sending him on high alert. He could hear the sirens of the trucks coming and was slightly relieved they were close by. He started to move, trying to make his way in through the doors that everyone was filing out of to see if he could help. Fortunately, the crowds of people appeared to be well controlled, and the scene didn’t present itself as one of chaos like you might think—probably because this was routine for them. Hospital personnel, medical professionals, and patients who were mobile made their way out of the building, guided by those who were instructed on evacuation procedures.

The boys crossed his mind, but he was comforted by the fact that they were with Gillian, and she would make sure they got out safe if there really was a fire. He heard the fire truck pull up, but then he heard the police cruisers pull up, as well. He turned to see Gillian’s brother Sean get out of a car with a radio to his mouth talking as he took in the scene around him. Well, that many officers showing up for a fire alarm wasn’t normal procedure. He was turning to go talk to Sean when he heard Ryan call out to him, “Dad! Dad!” Both boys suddenly accosted him, looking a little on edge by what was going on around them. Of course they were freaked out. They may think it cool later, but at the moment, it was a lot to take in.

Right about that time he heard Sean call out to him, “Jake! Get the boys out of there now!”

Jake immediately concluded that there was more going on in there. He ushered the boys over to where Sean was standing and asked, “What the hell is going on, Sean?” The boys were trying to talk to him, but he was looking at Sean when he heard him say, “We got a report of shots fired in the building just when the fire alarm went off! Now get the boys out of here!”

Then it hit him—the boys were here, but Gillian was not. He looked at the boys and demanded, “Where is your mom, Dylan? Did you see her?”

Dylan nodded and said, “Yes! We were on the second floor, holding the elevator doors for her, and waiting.” He had to come up for air because he was breathing so fast. He continued, “She said I love you, and then she pulled the fire alarm thing on the wall. Then the elevator doors closed and brought us down here.”

Sean, who was next to them, dropped to his knees in front of his nephew and asked, “Did you say your mom pulled the alarm?” Dylan nodded. Sean pressed on, “Did you see a fire? Or any smoke?” Dylan shook his head. “Was your mommy alone?”

Dylan shook his head no and said, “She said she had to see Adam before we went to lunch. She was standing there talking, but then pulled on the red box on the wall.”

The child pulled in a deep breath and looked at his uncle Sean and asked, “Is Mommy gonna get in trouble for setting off that alarm if there is no fire?”

Sean smiled at his nephew, who looked a lot like his sister and said, “Don’t you worry about Mommy getting in trouble. I’ll take care of it.” He then stood and looked to Jake and said, “Get the boys out of here, Jake.” As he started talking into his radio, motioning to another police officer near him, his hand perched on the gun holstered at his side. Sean was on high alert, and Jake didn’t like that Gillian had pulled that alarm. He had to get in there to her.

Just then Jake saw one of Gillian’s coworkers stroll past him, and he reached out to her. “Marsha?”

She turned and looked at Jake, then at the boys next to him, and smiled. “Hey there boys, where’s Gillian?”

Jake was relieved when the woman recognized him and asked her, “Could you please watch the boys for me? I need to find her.” The desperation on his face was enough for the older woman to instantly see, so she grabbed each of the boys’ hands as she continued with the crowd heading out of the building. Jake knew that Gilly spoke highly of the woman and would trust the boys with her. Right now, he needed to find Gillian because that sinking feeling in his gut was now like a ten-ton weight pulling him down.

Jake caught up with Sean near the elevators as he saw some familiar faces pass him by, but none of them were Gillian. “Sean, I have to get up to the second floor!”

Sean turned to Jake and barked at him, “Get your ass out of here, Jake!”

“Bullshit!
I'm not going anywhere! The boys said Gillian pulled the alarm, and you said there was a report of shots fired! We have to get to where she was on the second floor. I know my way around the building! She had to be near x-ray because that is right where the elevators are.” Sean just stared at Jake, obviously trying to figure out if getting Jake to leave was a battle worth fighting.

He saw the resolve spread across Sean’s face when he decided he didn’t care about procedure. Finding his sister was top priority. Sean nodded at Jake and then motioned for another officer to follow them. They made their way through the door to the stairwell that came out near the elevators. Jake stayed behind them and let them do their thing, making sure everything was safe and secure—not moving in a new direction without making sure all was clear. They got up the stairwell and looked through the window, but the fire doors were still closed so they couldn’t see anything. They were going to have to go open them. As Sean opened the door from the stairwell, they could immediately detect the lingering scent of gunpowder. This is where the gun was fired. Shit! This is where the boys had last seen Gillian. Only years of working as a paramedic helped Jake control the panic that was starting to rise at the thought of anything happening to Gillian.

As Sean and the other officer made their way toward the fire door, Jake heard something. Was that someone crying? He rushed forward, touched Sean on the shoulder, and put his finger up to his mouth. He then pointed to his ear, gesturing for him to be quiet and listen. That was when they heard it—there was someone on the other side of that fire door, and they were crying. Placing his hand on the fire door to feel for heat, Sean then shoved the door slowly forward. As he pushed forward, the blood was the first thing that jumped up and grabbed Jake’s attention. The puddle was in front of the door and the movement of the door just moved the blood with it. Until the door hit something, and they all froze. Was the gunman behind the door? This wasn’t good.

Sean motioned for Jake to step back, which he did. He motioned for the other officer to cover him as he counted backward from three with his fingers in the air. Three … Two … One, and swung himself behind the door with his gun drawn and pointing at whatever it was that was there. Jake didn’t realize he was holding his breath until he suddenly released it when he heard Sean curse and drop to his knees while holstering his weapon. “Get a damn medic up here! A doctor!
Someone!” Sean yelled at the officer as if Jake wasn’t even standing there. Jake was a medic—why was Sean asking for one when Jake was capable of helping. Unless … Jake sprinted forward around the officer calling for help to see Sean hovering over Gillian. His first thought was
thank God they found her
. Then he really took in the scene before him as he noticed all of the blood. All of the blood covering the floor and covering Gillian.

Her eyes were open, and she was trying to tell Sean something, but Jake couldn’t hear it. Sean’s jaw clenched as he reached for his radio. “The suspect’s name is Adam Wallace! He is an employee of the hospital! He was last seen exiting the second floor approximately five minutes ago. He is armed and dangerous! I repeat, he is armed and dangerous!” Jake blinked and thought to himself,
Adam? Adam did this?
He saw that bastard walk right out of here like he was part of the crowd. Damn! He was responsible for all of this blood? Gillian’s blood?