Love Takes Time (Christian Romance) (15 page)

“No
Ryder, I don’t.  I know what I want.  But it’s not my place to choose
for you what 
you 
want.  One day if you ever decide that you are
ready to work for something other than your company, then you can give me a
call.  If that day ever comes I promise I will answer.  What I can’t
promise is how I will feel.  Maybe I’ll be waiting for you and maybe I won’t.
 I do think this is for the best right now though.  I love you Ryder.
 Goodbye.”

After
that last statement, she closed the limo door behind her.  Still in shock,
Ryder watched her walk down the street before she flagged down a yellow cab and
got inside.  He realized how ironic the moment was.  They were parked
in almost the same location as the limo was on the day he had first bumped into
her.  

He
smiled.  That day he could not have possibly imagined how much she would throw
his life into turmoil in the best and worst ways.  Yet still just like
that first time, she had gotten out of the car and had run off without him,
only this time he hadn’t yelled after her.  He thought it was for the
best.  It seemed that fate had played a tortuous game with him and when it
had finished, put him right back where he started.   

“To
the airport sir?”

His
respite from the real world was halted by the question from his driver.
 It held a finality that said that once he answered, he would be choosing
the path he was going to take.  He’d be driving away from her and towards
his old life once again.  He paused for a moment, truly considering what
he was about to do.  But he had no choice.   

“Yes,
straight to the airport please.  I’ve got a lot of work to get done.”

***

Chelsea
shut the door behind herself and walked straight into her room.  She
didn’t want Sasha to see her at all.  She sat on the edge of her bed
completely and totally numb.  She’d just broken up with the only guy that
she really had ever seen a future with.  He was the perfect guy in almost
every way except the one that mattered to her the most.  

When
she was younger, she remembered reading a book about the different ways that
people showed and received love.   The book called it a persons’ love
language.  She had previously thought she didn’t fall into any of them.
 Of course that was probably because she really didn’t believe so much in
love back then.  She preferred to call it being happy with someone--enjoying
life with them.  Love was too different for her in the past.  It was
problematic.  Love was too all encompassing.  Too controlling.
 Too rigid, tight, and demanding.  She really didn’t see the major
need for it in her life.  That was until she had met him. When love took
on a whole new definition for her.  As she curled up in fetal position on
her bed, she realized that the most important aspect of love for her was
spending her time with the one she cared for.  Quality time, and lots of
it.    

This
is why I never fell in love before.  It hurts a lot.  

She
turned over on her side.  The one thing she needed from him was what he
wouldn’t be able to promise her--his time.  Without that, she knew that
she’d continue to nag him and he’d continue to work as hard as he did.
 That’s who she was and he was.  Eventually they would have gotten to
an even worse point where neither of them would be able to stand each other and
she didn’t want that. She reasoned that to herself over and over again but none
of the validity of that logic made it hurt any less.  

The
worst thing was that he didn’t even fight for her.  He didn’t seem to
understand that in that final look, she was giving him one more chance to
choose her.  She wished he would have stopped her.  That he would
have told her that there was nothing in the world more important to him than
her.  Anything would have been better than that stoic look that he had as
she got out of the car.  Calm even in the face of her pain.  She was
hurt but as she remembered the look on his face, she was more convinced than
ever that they weren’t right for each other.  Her phone started to ring
and after being startled for a second, she rushed to grab it, hoping he had
thrown caution to the wind.  She read the ID and was deflated.

“Hi
mom.”

“Hi
sweetheart.  Are you busy?”

She
wiped the tears that she did not know had been forming in her eyes.  

“Not
at all mom.  What’s up?”

“Oh
nothing at all honey.  You ran across my mind just now and I felt like
calling you.  Probably because I’m cooking your favorite dessert right
now.”

That
caused Chelsea to perk up a bit.  Nothing like food to make a bad day
better.

“Peach
cobbler with a pecan crumble crust!?”

“You
don’t know your favorite dessert?”

“Oh
I do.  I just hope that you are making me one on the side.”

“On
the side, of course honey.  But I was hoping you’d come by for dinner
tonight.  I’m cooking all the things you like; glazed ham, mashed
potatoes, extra cheesy macaroni and cheese, and corn on the cob.  Your
father and I wanted to throw you a little congratulatory celebration on going
back to school.  You deserve it so we are behind you all the way.”

“Wow
mom, thanks.  Now if you throw in a little vanilla bean ice cream with
that cobbler, you just might get me to move back home.”

“Alright
then sweetie, I was running by the store later so I will get the ice cream
then, but you know your old room has been turned into your fathers ‘man cave’
so you couldn’t move back in here even if I wanted you to.  Are you going
to bring your boyfriend with you?”

Ryder
had met her parents one time before and they got along so well.  She
wasn’t ready to tell them that they had broken up just yet.  It had
happened so recently that she didn’t even really believe it herself.  She
definitely wasn’t ready to share the painful truth with anyone. 

“No
mom. He had to go out of town.... again.”

“Goodness
gracious that man travels a lot.  Well, I guess that’s the cost of being
as successful as he is.”

“True.
 Hey mom, I
gotta
take care of some things
before tonight.  See you later, ok.”

She
hung up with her mother, figuring that she would tell her parents about her and
Ryder either after dinner or later in the week.  No sense in ruining a
good meal.  Her parents were big fans of Ryder since meeting him.  It
made sense seeing that they probably blamed him for some of the more proactive
decisions she had been making in her life. The biggest of which was of course
her returning to school.  

It was
true that she and Ryder were done.  He was good for a season in her life.
 She realized that she never even had the chance to tell him about her
going back to school.  Not dance school, but college. She had wanted to
keep it a secret from him until that day, when she had actually made the
payment for the tuition for the upcoming semester.  Being around him had
made her realize that a little more direction and structure in her life
wouldn’t have necessarily been a bad thing.

Her parents had been ecstatic when she told them
she was going back to school and they even promised to give her the monies that
they had saved up for her in order to pay for it.  She was astonished to
find out that they had saved more for her than she’d realized.  Enough to
cover almost four years of classes as well as living expenses.  The dance
lessons she taught would just be for extra money.  The funniest thing was
that she’d be going back for business.  She knew that Ryder would laugh at
that if he were there. 

Thinking about his laugh
caused fresh tears to appear.  It was times like these that she talked to
God the most.  Especially when she was confused. 

God, why did you have to
make this so hard?  I know that you know what you’re doing but this isn’t
fun.

She had more to pray. 
More to ask but for some reason, she just felt like everything was going to be
okay.  Like things were happening just like they were supposed to. 
She breathed a deep sigh to catch her breath and stop the tears that had rolled
down her cheeks.  Everything would be alright.  That she knew.
 Things were going to be a little bit different for her from here on out.
 She wouldn’t forget who she was, but she wasn’t a child anymore and she
was ready to grow up.  As hurt as she was by Ryder, she silently thanked
him before drifting into a much needed nap.

It
had been a few months since the day that Chelsea last spoke to Ryder and she
had decided to spend part of the day at the park.  She hadn’t dated anyone
else in that time; No one had caught her attention like he did.  He was
one of a kind.  She was proud of herself for how well she was doing in
school and thought she had a real chance of making the dean’s list, which was
what led to her major study session that week.  Finals were approaching
and she wanted to do as well as possible.

It
was a good thing for her that she didn’t have to work full time anymore because
she really needed the time to study.   Looking at the equation in front of
her, she scribbled down her answer, crossed her fingers, and turned to the back
of the book to see if her answer was correct.

“Yes!
 
Finally
.”

Chelsea
placed the large book on her lap and rubbed her temples with her hand.
 Going back to school had been harder than she remembered but she was
happy she had done so because it showed how much she had really changed as a
person.   A year ago, she would have never imagined the detours that
her life had taken but now she was in the midst of doing all the things that
she should have done years ago.  She figured an alternate route on a
journey can be just as fulfilling as the straight path so she wasn’t upset with
her past decisions either.  Well maybe except for losing Ryder.  That
one still stung some days. 

She
looked upwards and closed her eyes, letting the sun shine on her face before
looking around.  She was sitting on one of the wooden benches at the park.
 She liked going there to study.  Something about the hustle and
bustle of people moving and going made her feel like she was a part of everyday
life, yet the birds, green grass and, hopefully, sunny days helped her relax.
 As she surveyed the area around her, to her left about a hundred
feet--she saw him.  It was Ryder.  

At
first she didn’t recognize him.  He was wearing shorts and a casual shirt.
 He looked attractive even in that.  In fact, he looked younger.
 That was one of two things that made it hard for her to recognize him at
first--until he looked in her direction and their eyes met.  The other
thing that made her overlook him was the dog.  He was at the park, in
shorts, playing with a dog.  No way was that the Ryder who she knew.
 She smiled as he walked in her direction, the small dog running around
his legs in circles trying to figure out why his game of catch had ended.  

“Chelsea.
 Hi there.”

That
was the voice that she remembered so well.  He was still every bit as
handsome and charismatic as ever.  Her pulse felt rushed just talking to
him again.  

“Ryder.
 I never imagined I’d see you here.  At the park.”  

She motioned
at the animal looking up into his face for directions.  

“And
with a dog no less.”

He
laughed softly, and slowly took his eyes off her to kneel down and rub the dog
behind his ears.  

“Oh
him.  This little guy here is Eddie.”

“Eddie?
 What kind of nerd names a dog Eddie?”  She chuckled, teasing him
already.

“Hey,
that happens to be the name of the dog on one of my favorite TV shows thank
you.  I figured it was a nice name and since he’s my dog, that’s his name.
 So that’s that.”

He
looked back to Eddie, cooing.  

“And
you like it, don’t you boy?  
Yes
you do.
 Now fetch.”

Ryder
threw the ball and the dog yelped before running after it.  

“So
this is 
your 
dog?”

“Of
course.  And why do you say it like that?  Am I not capable of caring
for another creature?”

He
wasn’t serious, she knew that.  But she answered him seriously still.  

“That’s
not what I meant.  I just never really saw you as a dog person.  Or an
animal person at all for that matter, but definitely not a dog person. They
just require so much attention and time.  I just
kinda
figured it was...your girlfriend’s dog or something.”

She
looked at him as she asked her silent question.

“Girlfriend.
 Ha.  No girlfriend for me right now Chelsea.  My last one was
more than enough to help me realize I needed to make some changes in my life so
I decided before I dated again, that I needed to re-evaluate things in my life.
 Find out what was important, you know.”

Chelsea
was relieved when he said that he was still single.  Not that she was
planning to put moves on him.  He and she were definitely old news.
 She reasoned to herself that it was because she hadn’t seen him in so
long but she knew that wasn’t the whole story.  If she was being honest
with herself, the whole time that they had been apart, she still considered him
to be hers.    

“And
did you?”  

She
quizzed, looking into his eyes.  

“Did
you find what you needed to?”

He
paused, looking hard at her before responding.  

“Yes
I did.  So Eddie here is one of the things about me that has changed in
the past few months.  You know Chelsea, when I last saw you I was on my
way back to Japan where I was able to smooth things over and save the client
relationship but I left the company afterwards.”

Her
breath caught in her throat upon hearing what he had just said.  She’d
never imagined in a million years that he would step away from the business
that generations of his family built.

“You
left your family’s company?  I can’t believe that you would do something
like that.”

He
took the ball from Eddie, throwing it again before continuing.

“That
day I told you I needed time to figure out what was right.  I needed to
take a break, but not just from you.  From everything.  I needed to
find out who I was, really, and what I wanted.  The only reason I went to
Japan that day is because no one else could close the deal but me.  When
it was all done, I didn’t even fly straight back.  I took two weeks just
for myself.  To clear my head, you know.  The last thing I expected
was that I would walk away from it ready to leave my father’s side but the more
I thought about it, the more it just felt like the right thing to do.  I
don’t think in all my years that I ever gave myself a chance to be me.
 Except when I was with you.”

She
looked at him as the last statement trailed from his lips. Seeing how much he
had changed in the short time period was astounding to her.  He had
embraced a lot of changes since they had been together and he looked happy.
 That made her feel good at least.  Listening to him talk, it felt
like old times.  Like she had never stopped loving him, and it was
completely possible that she hadn’t.

“Did
you hear me Chelsea?”

She hadn’t.
 She only realized just then that he had asked her a question.  She
smiled at him sheepishly.

“I’m
sorry.  I was thinking about something.  What were you saying?”

“I
was asking how you’ve been.   Catching up on some reading today?
 Not a bad day for it if I do say so myself.”

“Yeah,
just doing a little 
light
 reading.  Today’s topic is…”  

Chelsea
picked up the book and smiled, showing him the cover.  

“Calculus.
 Can you believe that you’re looking at Ms. College here?  You caught
me studying for finals now actually, thank you very much.”

Ryder
stepped back for a moment, looking at her sideways.

“Okay
now you have me spooked.  You, Chelsea Warner, are in college doing
calculus?”

“What?
 Don’t look at me like I’m lying. You aren’t the only one that can grow
you know.  Besides, this started when we were together.  Remember the
day that we broke up and I told you I wanted to talk?”

“Of
course.  I could never forget that day.”

“Good.
 I wouldn’t want you to…  Anyway, I was going to tell you that day
that I had signed up to attend the university.  I had just finalized
everything when you dropped the bomb on me.”

“C’mon
Chelsea, with all due respect, I think we dropped the bomb on each other.”

“Maybe,
but that’s not what my friends think.  If you ever see any of them, then
you’ll know what the looks are for.  Regardless of what happened, I can
say that being around you with all your drive and determination made me take a
look at my life.  Although I didn’t agree with you nearly at all on
throwing 
all
 of your time and life at work and the future, I
realized that it was important to plan and to have a goal… a dream even.
 When we finished things, I almost decided not to go just out of spite.
 Like me holding myself back was going to somehow hurt my ex-boyfriend’s
feelings.  I was about to respond out of my own anger when I realized then
that I actually did want to go back and that I was taking that step for myself
and not just to impress my cute boyfriend.  Make no mistake about it, I
did want to impress you at the time I decided to go to school though.
 Just don’t let it go to that big head of yours.”

They
smiled at each other for a few seconds before Chelsea tore her gaze away from
his, staring off into the distance and thinking.  Ryder broke the silence.

“Amazing
isn’t it Chelsea?”  

“What?”

“Just
how much the two of us have changed.”

“Yeah,
I guess we both have, haven’t we?”

“Do
you ever think what could have happened had we stayed together?”

She
wanted to say of course she had--that the minute she had walked out of the car
she wished she’d turned around and found a way to do things differently.
 Instead she just nodded her head in agreement as he continued.

“I
mean, I wanted to call you.  I really did.  You might be surprised to
hear this but my family even tried to make me call you a few times when they
saw me moping around the place.  Of course if you know my dad, you know he
tried to use it to his advantage, trying to incite me to come back and work for
him again at the company.  His exact words to me were ‘Son, if you are
going to be miserable, you might as well do it working for me.  Otherwise,
be a man and call that girl.’  I didn’t go back to work for him, but as
you know I never called you either.”

Chelsea
felt good to hear that his parents wanted to keep her around but she didn’t
understand the rest of his enigmatic actions regarding her.  She didn’t
change her number or tell him never to call.  If he wanted to talk to her
all he really had to do was just pick up the phone and dial the number.
   

“Why
not Ryder?  Why didn’t you call if you wanted to so much?  You could
have just picked up the phone and done so.  It’s not like you ever had a
problem using a telephone in the past.”

Ryder
grabbed his stomach and bent over a bit, as if in pain.  

“Ouch!
 That was a low blow Chelsea.”

When
she realized that he wasn’t in real physical pain, she laughed.

“You’re
right.  That was completely below the belt from me but I just couldn’t
help myself.  You know you really should have called Ryder.  If you
cared.”

“I
did care Chelsea.  And I promise you that I wrestled with calling you
often, one time even dialing your number and letting the phone ring before
hanging up quickly.’

“I remember
that because I saw your number on the caller ID.   When my phone only
rang once, I figured it was a mistake and that if you really were trying to
call, you’d just pick your phone right up and do so again.  Actually, I
was hoping that you would.  So what stopped you from doing it if you went
so far?”