Love to Bear: A Werebear Shifter Romance (13 page)

Franklin shook his head. My hands went limp, tingling
all the way to my heart.

“
I don't understand...you're telling me my father
somehow caused this?”

The Elder nodded sadly. “It took Clara's death to
confirm what Emmerick already suspected. Every human woman dies of
the fever just the same. Always a year, maybe two, after giving
birth. It comes without warning.”

My stomach boiled. I wanted to heave, overwhelmed with
sickly shock.

“
The things we do
aren't meant to keep us scared, held up here, locked away from the
outside world. They're mostly for the human's benefit. We really are
a cursed creature, just like Emmerick says. We can't reproduce
without taking life. The only moral thing to do is let go, live our
lives, and say
no more.
”

I took several steps backward, still shaking. My head
spun. I thought about Sam, wondering if I'd already doomed her.

For a second, I wanted to forget his words, to guess
that this was some complicated scheme crafted by Emmerick to throw us
all off. But the tense emotions written on his old face were too
real.

Way too fucking honest too.

“
Go home and get some rest, Don.” He gently
laid one hand on my shoulder. “Keep your relationship with this
human girl friendly and productive. Nothing more. Anything else will
only hurt you both, and I don't want you to suffer. Emmerick won't
allow it either.”

“
Screw Emmerick!” I turned angrily.

Franklin had done enough for me. At least I'd gotten the
truth. As pissed off as I was, I had no business shifting and clawing
up his cabin, or worse. I ran.

I heard his voice echoing after me as I tore out the
door. My feet prodded the cold autumn soil loudly as I headed
straight for the forest.

Amid the tall trees, I tore off my clothes. No need to
shred yet another pair if I could avoid it.

The cool wind caressed my body, reminding me of Sam's
soothing touch. But it couldn't hold back the bear.

My skin rippled. Fur sprouted, bones cracked, my face
lengthened with leathery nose and sharp teeth.

I stood on my hind legs and roared, staring at the small
crescent sliver in the sky, spilling its cold silvery glow across the
landscape. A walk would clear my senses, or at least drain away some
of the rage.

I passed on through the forest, walking along the ether
veil, half-hoping I'd encounter a hunter or maybe a real grizzly.
Anything to put me out of my misery.

It's all pure, unbroken, hellish misery now. Life
without her is pointless. A future where Sam has to leave forever is
no future at all.

I watched the breath smoking out past my snout. In the
forest's depths, I kicked big branches to the side with my huge paws,
stopping to shred a few.

Feeling the rough wood tearing against my claws always
helped. Calming, if only a little, reminding me of my power.

The moon was high above the mountains by the time I
began to return to the cabin. Bear satisfied, I shifted, feeling my
size and power retreating.

Walking naked to the spot where I'd shifted, I stopped
for my clothes, and dressed when I was only a few yards from home.

The boundary world was gone. A cold fog rolled in from
the mountains, darkening the entire forest, threatening to harden
into frost by morning.

I approached the glowing window in my cabin, heart heavy
as an iron. I knew what I had to do.

Sam looked up with a smile when I pushed inside. I shut
the door and turned to face her. It hurt to see her so happy, so
innocent, so blissfully ignorant.

“
Sit down at the table, Samantha,” I said.
“We need to talk.”

VII: Tangled Confessions
(Sam)

I couldn't believe what he was telling me. My head
pounded.

My mouth went dry and my skin started burning, but it
was nothing like the all consuming fire searing through my heart.

“
It's a trick,” I said weakly. “That
fucker, Emmerick. He must have falsified something and gotten the
others to believe it. Please, Don, you have to go back and tell him
that!”

“
It's no lie. Franklin isn't like Emmerick, and
he's not stupid either. He would've checked everything. He's a man of
science. I won't be responsible for your death, Sam. I love you too
much.”

“
Then why don't you dig deeper instead of taking
these assholes at their word? Thinking I'm going to die just from
having sex with you is preposterous!”

“
I don't care.” His voice was hard. “If
there's even a 1% chance this could happen, I'm not putting you in
danger. I couldn't live with myself if something happened, unlikely
or not. I'm sorry. There's no other choice.”

Without thinking, I threw myself into his arms. His arms
comforted me for a moment, strong and gentle as always, searching for
my happiness. But his embrace began to grow awkward, became a ghost
of the full, muscular warmth I knew he could give me.

I looked up and saw his face tight, horrified, verging
on tears or screams or both.

No, no, no!

In one jerk, I twisted away from him. The cabin suddenly
felt hideously claustrophobic, like a morgue for our dearly departed
love.

I couldn't take it. I pushed past him and ran, throwing
open the door and stepping out into the icy autumn night.

For once, nature cooperated with me. I just wanted to
hide, and the cloudy night gave perfect cover.

I stepped into the thick fog waiting for me at the edge
of the forest, wishing I could disappear into it forever.

If he loved me, he'd be sneaking into the archive
with me right now. We'd be doing everything we could to disprove this
rotten nonsense...

On and on I ran. Dead leaves crunched underfoot. Gnarled
branches snapped.

Something scampered past as I got deeper. Probably a
mouse or a squirrel – too small to be dangerous.

Only a crack in the clouds above gave any light. And
even then, the moonlight was so far, so faint, struggling to shine
through the thickening fog.

Bastards.
They all live on fear here. Fear, hate, and loneliness.
I balled my fists, ready to pound a tree or something as another
question echoed in my brain.

But what if it's true? You've seen him fight to keep
you safe from harm.

If he loves you, he'll keep you safe from everything.
Even if the threat is him.

My eyes blurred with tears. Doubting Don's love was
torture, but knowing he loved me and we couldn't embrace it anymore
was twice as agonizing.

A fallen branch cracked sharply. My next step fell
unevenly, got tangled in wiry roots, and they pulled. Hard.

Next thing I knew, I was on the ground sobbing, folding
my arms tight for comfort. I reached for my sprained foot, rubbing
the sore knot beneath my sock.

The dense forest became dizzying. Wild and scary. I
couldn't have told anyone where I was for all the money in the world.

Maybe
I've passed through the ether,
I thought hopefully.
I
just want to go home. All the way to Kalispell and then Sioux Falls.
I'd rather think about Ryan on my old turf than be reminded of this
bullshit every time I see
the mountains.

More honest pangs shot through my chest. They told me
I'd miss Don horribly, no matter how much he brushed me off, or how
many miles I put between us.

Love was never rational, was it? Let alone easy.

“
I see you've come to your senses.” The
voice I wanted to hear just then rang out behind me.

I spun to see Emmerick and almost fell on my ass a
second time. A fallen tree caught me on the side. I staggered up to
face him, wondering if he was really there or just a hallucination
projecting from my mind.

“
It's okay, female. I'm not here to hurt you.”

I wanted to punch him. If this unassuming old man didn't
have the ability to change himself into a thousand pound grizzly bear
and rip me apart, I would have.

“
What do you want?” The rancor in my voice
surprised even me.

“
I'm here to help you get home.” For the
first time ever, I saw a smile on his thin lips as he stepped
forward. “You're obviously lost out here, and I want to help
return you to your people. It's the best thing for everyone.”

“
You don't want me to keep doing your busy work?”

Emmerick shook his head like I'd asked the dumbest
question in the world. “No. You've given me enough material to
think about for a few years. As far as I'm concerned, your work with
the clan is done.”

“
And I'm supposed to think the rest of the Elders
approved this?”

His smile disappeared. Slowly, he raised a long, bony
finger to his lips. The hiss escaping them sounded like a cat rearing
up to fight.

“
Shhh. Our little secret. The fools on the Council
don't know what's good for them. Neither does Don.”

“
Don't you dare talk about him,” I growled.
“You're the reason I'm out here. You and your records.”

“
Now, who's the liar? Franklin had a little chat
with me this evening. He told me about Don's visit, how he had to
spill the beans about some very unpleasant history...”

Emmerick moved forward, and stopped just short of taking
my hand. If he tried it, I swore I'd scream, and claw, and –

Ah, hell. I don't know what to do. Much as I don't
want to admit it, this monster is my only ticket out of here.

And right now, I'd rather walk with the devil than go
back to Don.

“
Okay. But I don't want to talk to you and I
definitely never want to see you again.”

Emmerick's hand danced out in a flourish, accepting the
evil bargain. And probably my soul too. The gentleman act made me
want to vomit.

Regardless, I walked on, letting him get a little ahead
of me as the forest paths narrowed. Emmerick's tall, cloaked form
moved steadily through the fog, a giant shadow guiding me away from
this nightmare.

I focused on his dark form, trying my best not to think
about Don during the long march. Naturally, it didn't work. I was so
preoccupied trying to forget I didn't see the huge shape closing on
us up ahead.

When the bear stopped a few feet from Emmerick, I held
my breath. Was it another shifter? Or a wild animal?

“
Who's that?” Emmerick sounded like he
shared my surprise and uncertainty. “You're not supposed to be
out here! Go back to the clan. These are human lands.”

The beast took another step toward us. I saw the
lightning in its eyes, the gold flecks, and I knew it wasn't a wild
grizzly.

The bear stood. Shifter or not, the fearsome sight set
my heart racing.

I stumbled backward. Emmerick moved forward, yelling
angrily at the beast and waving his hands. At one point, his fist
darted out, punching the huge bear in the side.

The behemoth looked down, almost in disbelief, and then
swung back. I screamed as the woods were filled with a sound like a
large sheet tearing in two.

Emmerick fell. I scurried past him, keeping my distance
from the bear.

He wasn't wounded. The beast's calculated claw had only
torn his large cloak, but if the claws had been just one inch
longer...

“
You dirty, underhanded, ungrateful little shit!”
Emmerick popped up, smoke practically shooting from his ears. “This
is for your own good. You're just too dumb to know it! This is your
last chance: turn back now.”

The bear charged, jaws stretched wide and spittle
flying. Emmerick fell backward. His bare, wrinkly flesh rippled
beneath the cloak.

Now,
the fabric tore all the way. The shredded cloak fell to the ground as
Emmerick the bear trampled
over
it.

I screamed again, covering my ears. Disturbed birds
fluttered in the darkness, no doubt wondering why their cold,
peaceful forest had suddenly become a battleground.

I jumped behind a giant log, and just in time. The bears
were snarling, throwing fists and jaws, tearing at each other's fur.

Jesus. Why did I have to lose that bear spray on my
first trip here?

I knew I was helpless. All I could do was hide as their
fight raged on, over a ton of raw muscle, teeth, and claws moving
like a roaring tornado.

One of them broke, defeated. The bear took off, much
faster than anything that size should be allowed to run.

The log I was hiding behind rumbled like it was hit with
an earthquake as the bear's huge body smacked into it, groaned, and
then kept going.

I threw myself on the ground like a soldier escaping
bombardment. When I finally looked up, the woods were still, filled
with distant scampering footsteps and very heavy breathing.