Authors: J. R. Ward
Bella was writhing on top of the mattress, tangled in the sheets. When she saw him she cried out, but then she settled down, as if she'd willed herself calm.
"I'm okay." She rolled over onto her stomach, her thighs rubbing together as she pulled the duvet over her body. "I'm… really… It's going to be—"
Another shock wave came out of her, so strong it pushed him back as she jackknifed into a ball.
"Go," she groaned. "Worse… when you're here. Oh…
God
…"
As she let out a ragged curse, Z stumbled back to the door even though his body roared for him to stay.
Getting himself out into the corridor was like hauling a mastiff off a target, and once he shut the door he raced for Phury's.
From all the way down the hall of statues he could smell what his twin and V were lighting up. And when he burst inside the bedroom, the blanket of smoke was already thick as fog.
Vishous and Phury were on the bed, thick blunts between their fingers, mouths tight, bodies straining.
"What the hell are you doing here?" V demanded.
"Give me some," he said, nodding at the mahogany box between them.
"Why have you left her?" V sucked in hard, the handrolled's orange tip glowing bright. "The needing hasn't passed."
"She said it was worse when I was there." Z leaned over his twin and grabbed a blunt. He had trouble lighting the thing because his hands were shaking so badly.
"How's that possible?"
"Do I look like I have any experience with this shit?"
"But it's supposed to get better if a male's with her." V scrubbed his face, then looked over in disbelief. "Wait a minute—you didn't lay with her, did you? Z… ? Z, answer the fucking question."
"No, I didn't," he snapped, aware that Phury was very, very quiet.
"How could you leave that poor female unserved in her condition?"
"She said she was okay."
"Yeah, well, it's just getting started. She's not going to be okay. The only way to relieve the pain is if a male finishes inside of her, you feel me? You
can't
leave her like that. It's cruel."
Z paced over to one of the windows. The shutters were still down for the day, and he thought of the sun, that great, bright jailer. God, he wished he could get out of the house. He felt like a trap was closing in on him, and the urge to run was almost as bad as the lust he was crippled with.
He thought of Phury, who was keeping his eyes down and not saying a word.
Now's your chance
, Z thought.
Just send your twin down the hall to her. Send him in to service her in her need
.
Go on. Tell him to leave this room and go to yours and take off his clothes and cover her with his body.
Oh… God…
Vishous's voice cut through his self-torture, the tone gratingly reasonable. "Zsadist, it's wrong and you know it, true? You can't do this to her, she's—"
"How 'bout you back the fuck off, my brother."
There was a short silence. "Okay, I'll take care of her."
Z's head whipped around just as Vishous stabbed out his hand-rolled and got to his feet. As he hiked up his leathers, his arousal was obvious.
Zsadist launched himself across the room so fast, he didn't even feel his feet. He tackled Vishous down to the floor and clamped his hands around his brother's thick throat. As his fangs shot out of his upper jaw like knives, he bared them with a hiss.
"You go near her and I'll kill you."
There was a mad scramble behind him, no doubt Phury rushing to separate them, but V put the kibosh on any rescue attempt.
"Phury! No!" V dragged some air in. "Between me… and him."
Vishous's diamond eyes were sharp as he looked up, and though he was struggling for breath, his voice was as forceful as always.
"Relax, Zsadist… you dumb fuck…" Deep breath. "I'm going nowhere… Just needed to get your attention. Now loosen… your grip."
Z eased his hold, but didn't get off the brother.
Vishous inhaled with a big suck. A couple of times. "You feel your flow right now, Z? You feel that territorial urge? You've bonded with her."
Z wanted to deny it, but that was tough to do, considering the linebacker routine he'd just pulled. And the fact that he still had his hands around the male's throat.
V's voice dropped to a whisper. "Your path out of hell is waiting for you. She's down that hall, man. Don't be a fool. Go to her. It'll take care of both of you."
Z swung his leg up and dismounted, letting himself roll onto the floor. To avoid thinking about paths out and females and sex, he wondered idly what had happened to the blunt he'd been smoking. Glancing over at the window, he found he'd had the decency to balance it on the sill before he'd launched at Vishous like a rocket.
Well, wasn't he a gentleman.
"She can heal you," V said.
"I'm not looking to be healed. Besides, I don't want to get her pregnant, you feel me? What a fucking mess that would be."
"Is it her first time?"
"I don't know."
"If it is, the chances are practically zero."
" 'Practically' isn't good enough. What else can ease her?"
Phury spoke up from the bed. "You've still got the morphine, right? You know, that syringe I prepared from what Havers left? So use it. I've heard that's what unmated females do."
V sat up, balancing his thick arms on his knees. As he pushed his hair back, the sprawling tattoo at his right temple flashed. "It won't completely take care of the problem, but sure as shit it's better than nothing."
Another shock wave of heat rippled through the air. The three of them groaned and were momentarily incapacitated, their bodies whacking out, straining, wanting to go where they were needed, where they could be used to ease a female's pain.
As soon as Z was able to, he got to his feet. As he left, Vishous was climbing back onto Phury's bed and lighting up again.
When Z was back at the other end of the house, he braced himself before he reentered his room. Opening the door he didn't dare look in her direction as he forced his body over to the bureau.
He found the syringes and picked up the one Phury had filled. Taking a deep breath, he turned around, only to discover that the bed was empty.
"Bella?" He walked over. "Bella, where…"
He found her crumpled on the floor, a pillow between her legs, her body trembling.
She started to sob as he knelt beside her. "It hurts…"
"Oh, God… I know,
nalla
." He brushed her hair out of her eyes. "I'll take care of you."
"Please… it hurts so badly." She rolled over, her breasts tight and bright red at the tips... Beautiful. Irresistible. "It hurts. It hurts so badly. Zsadist, it won't stop. It's getting worse. It h—"
In a massive surge, she undulated wildly, a blast of energy coming out of her body. The strength of the hormones she emitted blinded him, and he got so caught up in his body's beastly response that he didn't feel anything… even as she grabbed his forearm with enough force to bend his bones.
When the peak faded, he wondered if she'd broken his wrist. It wasn't that he cared about the pain; he would take any of that she needed to give him. But if she was hanging onto him that desperately, he could just imagine what she was going through in her insides.
With a wince, he realized she'd bit her lower lip hard enough to make it bleed. He wiped the blood off her mouth with his thumb. Then had to rub the stuff on his pant leg so he didn't lap it up and want more.
"
Nalla
…" He looked at the syringe in his hand.
Do it
, he said to himself.
Drug her. Take the hurt away
.
"Bella, I need to know something."
"What?" she moaned.
"Is this your first time?"
She nodded her head. "I didn't know it would be this bad—Oh,
God
…"
Her body spasmed again, her legs crushing the pillow.
He glanced back at the syringe. Better than nothing was not good enough for her, but his releasing into her seemed like a sacrilege. Goddamn it, his ejaculations were the worse of the two piss-poor options she had, but biologically speaking, he could do more for her than the morphine.
Z reached up and put the needle on the bedside table. Then he stood and kicked off his boots while he peeled his shirt over his head. He unzipped his fly, springing that hideous, aching length, and stepped out of his leathers.
He needed pain to orgasm, but he wasn't worried about that. Hell, he could hurt himself enough to trigger a release. That was why he had fangs, right?
Bella was writhing in misery as he picked her up and laid her out on the bed. She was so magnificent against the pillows, her cheeks flushed, her lips parted, her skin glowing from the needing. But she was in such pain.
"Shhh… easy," he whispered as he got on top of the bed. On top of her.
As their naked skin brushed, she moaned and bit into her lip again. This time he bent down and licked the fresh blood off her mouth. The taste of it, the electric tingle on his tongue, thrilled him. Scared him. Reminded him that he'd been living off weak sustenance for over a century.
With a curse he shoved all his stupid fucking baggage out of the way and focused on Bella. Her legs were sawing underneath him, and he had to force them wide with his hands, then pin them with his thighs. When he touched her core with his hand, he was shocked. She was on fire, drenched, swollen. She cried out, and the orgasm that followed relieved her struggles a little, her arms and legs going still, her breathing getting less harsh.
Maybe this was going to be easier than he thought. Maybe Vishous was wrong about her needing a male inside. In which case, he could just go down on her over and over again. Man, he would
love
to do that for a day. The first time he had put his mouth to her hadn't lasted nearly long enough.
He eyed his clothes. Probably should have kept them on—
The force of energy that came out of her then was so great, he was actually pushed upright from her body, as if invisible hands had punched at his torso. She screamed in misery as he hovered in midair above her. When the surge passed he fell back on top of her. The orgasm had obviously made the situation worse, and now she was weeping so hard tears no longer fell from her eyes. All she had was a case of the dry heaves as she twisted and contorted beneath him.
"Lie still,
nalla
," he said frantically. "Let me put it in you."
But she was too far gone to hear him. He had to muscle her to keep her in place, pushing down on her collarbone with a forearm while he forced one of her legs up and to the side. He tried to position the
it
for penetration by moving his hips, but couldn't manage to get the angle right. Even trapped under his superior strength and weight, she still managed to flail around.
With a nasty curse Z reached between his legs and grabbed the thing he needed to use on her. He guided the bastard to her threshold and then thrust hard, joining them deep. They both yelled.
And then he dropped his head and held on for dear life, getting lost in the sensation of her tight, slick sex. His body took over, his hips moving like pistons, the punishing, grinding rhythm creating a mighty pressure in his balls and a burning in his lower belly.
Oh, God
… A release was coming for him. Just as it had in the bathroom when she'd held on as he pumped. Only hotter. Wilder. Out of control.
"Oh, Jesus!" he hollered.
Their bodies were slapping together and he was mostly blind and he was sweating all over her and the bonding scent was a screaming roar in his nose… And then she called his name and seized up under him. Her core grabbed onto him in spasms that milked him until—
Oh, shit, God, no
—
On reflex he tried to pull out, but the orgasm tackled him from behind, shooting up his spine and nailing him in the back of the head just as he felt the release bullet out of his body into hers. And the damn thing didn't stop. He came in great waves, pouring into her, filling her up. There was nothing he could do to stop the eruptions even though he knew what he was spilling into her.
When the last shudder left him, he lifted his head. Bella's eyes were closed, her breathing even, the deep grooves in her face gone.
Her hands ran up his ribs and onto his shoulders, and she turned her face into his bicep with a sigh. The quiet in the room, in her body, was jarring. So was the fact that he'd ejaculated only because she'd made him feel… good.
Good? No, that didn't go far enough. She'd made him feel… alive. Awakened.
Z touched her hair, spreading the dark waves across a creamy pillow. There had been no pain for him, for his body. Just pleasure. A miracle…
Except then he became aware of the wetness where they were joined.
The implications of what he'd done in her made him twitchy, and he couldn't fight the compulsion to clean her up. He pulled out and quickly headed for the bathroom, where he grabbed a washcloth. When he returned to the bed, though, she'd started to undulate again, the need in her rising. He looked down at himself and watched the thing that hung from his groin grow hard and long in response.
"Zsadist…" she moaned. "It's… back."
He put the washcloth aside and mounted her again, but before he pushed into her he looked at her glassy eyes and had an attack of conscience. How whacked was it that he was greedy for more when the consequences were so ugly for her? Good God, he'd ejaculated into her, and the shit was all over her beautiful parts and the smooth skin of her thighs and—
"I can drug you," he said. "I can make you feel no pain and you won't have me inside you. I can help you without hurting you."
He stared down at her, waiting for her answer, caught between her biology and his reality.
Chapter Thirty-one