Love's Vengeance (56 page)

“But he no longer exists in your life!”

“It wouldn’t work! I can’t forget! I love him and I carry his child!”

“Love me. Consider it my child.” He pleaded.

“Oh you are impossible! I will refuse you admittance to my home and my company if you don’t stop!” She slapped his leg, dropping the subject.

Rene’ fell back onto the grass with a heavy sigh, looking to the clouds above, “This is not good for my pride.” he breathed. He recovered quickly though, grasping her arm, “Lay down.”

“What?”

“Lay down.” he repeated, “Here on my arm.”

Desiree laughed at him but complied slowly, “You shall have to help me up now, you know. Now I am like a turtle, stranded upon its back!” She lay in the crook of his arm and made a comical expression, looking up at him with her eyes crossed.

“Stop that! And stop laughing you little fool.” He scolded good-naturedly. He lowered his mouth to hers gently.

Desiree wrapped her fingers through his soft brown hair, returning his kiss, trying desperately to feel what he was attempting to arouse but she was unable.

He pulled back with a grin, “Do you feel anything for me yet? Just try—think about how much I have meant to you over the years…” he winced, shaking his head, “No don’t think that—you’ll only think of me as a brother again…Think of me—as just a man—a man that you met only recently and who has courted you passionately and adores you and pretend you adore me.”

“But I
do
adore you silly!” she giggled, “No need to pretend.”

As he leaned down once more and his lips possessed hers, Desiree tried to imagine what it might be like to be loved by him. She touched the hard muscle of his lean ribs and along his waist, feeling the solid strength there. It was no use though. No use at all.

Rene’ pulled back once more and sighed, “I don’t know about you but I’m convinced—marry me!” With a silly expression he kissed her again and Desiree giggled against his lips, “Please Rene’,” she managed, “Stop!”

He gently caressed her belly, his amber eyes full of mischief, “And if I don’t?”

“I shall tell Antoine and Honore’ and they shall kill you!”

Rene’ scowled darkly and then chuckled, “You are right.” He stood and gently helped Desiree to her feet and they continued their walk slowly across the meadow with arms about one another and Rene’ stated, “You can’t hold on to a memory forever Desiree.”

“Maybe not but for now I plan on having and caring for my baby—alone. I don’t wish to marry and Rene’—I don’t want you to be hurt. If you don’t stop this, you may end up hating me and I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you over this. I love you too much.” She leaned against him, laying her head upon his chest.

“That shall never happen. We have more than this between us. No matter what, you shall have my undying devotion forever.”

***

Desiree sat upon her bed, allowing Bridgett to remove her shoes and stockings, then lay back upon the pillows to rest. “Rene’ asked me to marry him again today.” she sighed heavily.

“And? What did you say?” Bridgett asked excitedly, taking a seat beside her.

“No of course. I will not marry him.”

Bridgett patted her hand comfortingly, “It’s early yet. You need time to forget Captain Colter.”

Desiree stared at her in amazement, “Forget him?” she questioned, “Bridgett tell me—how am I to do that? Please tell me—how am I to forget? I love him still! I would welcome him with open arms if he walked through that door today. I have a part of him that shall be with me for the rest of my life, God willing—a constant reminder! It shall never be over and I shall never forget Bridgett. I thought once, that leaving him would end it, as though the distance would wipe him from my mind but time and distance have only served to enhance my pain.” She confessed miserably.

“I understand sweet. Rene’ is very determined though. I have never seen him so set on something. He loves you very much and would love the baby.”

Bridgett spoke as though she hadn’t heard a word she had just said. She didn’t understand—not in the least, “I know all of that.
Mon Dieu
I wish I could love him. Just forget everything and feel the way he does but…” she stopped mid-sentence. She was so tired—tired from defending her feelings throughout the afternoon with Rene’, “Maybe someday—I don’t know.” She sighed, to Bridgett’s pleasure.

“Well you rest now sweet. I am sorry to have upset you.” Bridgett kissed her brow and took her leave.

Desiree turned to her side, facing the windows and massaged her belly; feeling a tiny limb pushing out against her hand, “Perhaps you need a father little one.” She said aloud, “And he is such a good man. Perhaps I could grow to love him as I loved your father. Perhaps I could love him better, without hurting him.”

Desiree thought of Rene’s kiss and imagined the lean frame above her, loving her—she felt nothing. Then she thought of Stephen, his kiss, his touch and the fusing of their bodies in ecstasy. She could see the dark brown eyes, the strikingly handsome face. She could remember the feel of his muscular body possessing her and his voice, deep and rich urging her on, whispering tender endearments as they plunged upon the roaring tide of fulfillment, clinging tightly to one another and she felt her desire flare. She wanted him—only him, even now.

She dismissed thoughts of Rene’. For now, she could not even consider marriage to him. She closed her eyes and her mind was filled with past images, glimpses of reality that had occurred with Stephen. Then imaginings of how it might have been had she been wise, and she drifted into a dream—feeling him, hearing his voice and she knew it would never be the same with any other man.

Chapter Forty-Six

Desiree lifted her crystal water goblet to join the others filled with wine and Francois Roche’ gazed into her eyes warmly, “To Desiree. May your nineteenth year be filled with happiness.”

“Here—Here!” echoed the table of guests.

“
Merci
Francois.” Desiree said, smiling softly and touching her goblet with a soft clink to each of her well wishers.

Her nineteenth year, she thought, just one month from this day would be a year she had been without her parents. In two months, she would become a mother and would have, at long last, that small treasure that made its presence known to her often throughout her days. She was growing impatient to behold Stephen’s child. She wondered if she would bear a son or a daughter—if Stephen would be evident in its features and she prayed so. She prayed for a son, with blond curls and velvety brown eyes to forever remind her of his father. So that as years passed and the memory of Stephen began to fade, she would have a likeness of him to enhance the memory.

Francois rose from his seat, holding his wife’s chair as she joined him and they rounded the table to place a kiss upon Desiree’s cheek, “Sweet we must be off—the evening is growing late. Happy Birthday.”

Bridgett and Jacques also rose, excusing themselves for the evening, leaving Desiree and her friends to reminisce over their years of comradery, which had become a tradition between the five of them. Each one’s birthday was a time to recall their shared experiences and between the five, there was never a lack.

***

With a peal of laughter, Desiree questioned, “Now who might this have been?” she lowered her voice to a pitch, well below what was normal and frowned thoughtfully, “My breeches may be on inside out but a fortnight from now, it shall be all the rage—mark my words!”

All eyes turned to Rene’ and he raised a hand, claiming responsibility as a roar of laughter went up. It had been a formal affair, at the grand ballroom in Rouen, when Rene’ had arrived late, having been out carousing for hours and was more than a little
foxed
. As he explained it, he had dressed in the carriage en route to arrive on time and somehow had managed to don his breeches inside out, fastened haphazardly and looking absolutely comical. All had noticed by the time he had and he had shrugged it off in typical Rene’ fashion, with that remark, bringing the crowd to tears with laughter. He had continued to be the center of attention all evening, for he had worn them so, his entire stay.

Antoine tapped his goblet with a spoon calling for order, “My turn.” he chuckled, “Now which of us might have said this. “
What? You mean this—this is Bartholomew?
”

Desiree covered her eyes with her hands, shaking her head, “How was I to know that my lamb I took such care of was to become a feast. I was devastated and you—” she waved an accusing finger at Honore’, “With your
Baa
—
Baa
, each bite you consumed! And speaking to my dinner plate in gentle tones as I fought to keep from bursting into tears!” she giggled as the others broke into laughter, “I must have been seven—eight?” she wondered, pausing thoughtfully, “I have been blessed to have found so many loyal friends to enhance my years.” she sighed, gazing at them lovingly.

“No more than we.” Philippe stated, lifting his glass to her in salute, “Happy Birthday Desiree!”

Happy Birthday!” echoed the other three.

***

Stephen could hardly contain the anguish as the ship made its way to the dock at Somerset and he looked at the large schooner, anchored in the harbor. He barked orders to the men and as soon as the ship ground to a halt, he was over the side, shimming down a line and leaping to the dock. He stopped the first man he met, motioning to the vessel, “Where is the captain of that ship?” he barked.

“At your home Stephen,” the young seaman replied hastily, seeing the concern on his face. Stephen headed up the dock at a jog, as the sailor watched him go, frowning quizzically at his receding back.

Stephen headed through the jungle and along the covered path to the back of the house, then around the side to the front door. He burst into the house, slamming the door soundly behind him.

“Stephen Colter!” Bessie barked, turning from the stairs she was about to climb, “Don’t you ever…”

“Where is the pirate captain Bess?” he interrupted anxiously.

Bess pointed toward the drawing room, “With your father—Lord I think you startled me out of ten years of my life! Why must you men always slam doors?”

Stephen hurried past her, ignoring her remarks, “They have been waiting for days!” she added grumbling as she mounted the stairs, for the second floor.

Stephen strode through the door, to find Red and his first mate reclining in chairs as his father stood at the bar pouring drinks.

“Captain Colter!” Red announced, and stood as Macintosh also came to his feet, “We had almost given up on seein’ ye.”

“She is gone Captain Greaves—Desiree left months ago.” Stephen announced lamely.

“Aye we been told all of that.” Red frowned and nodded solemnly, “We be ‘bout to set sail for France ourselves. We got the goods on the culprit.”

“Who?” Stephen asked softly.

“Do the name Jacques Monet mean anything to ye?” Red asked with a shrug of his shoulders, “I can na’ place the name meself. Never heard of the man but it be ‘em.” He assured with confidence, “We also got the name of a man, name of Jones what ‘ad been ‘hired to tamper wit’ a carriage and the same bloke burned the ‘house, all under orders from this Monet.”

Stephen paced the room, deep in thought—running the name over and over within his mind. He knew the name, he was sure of it—and then—it dawned on him, the conversations he had shared with Desiree so long ago on his ship, about her house and business and Jacques Monet living in her home, seeing to its completion.

He turned to Red abruptly, “Oh dear God—he is in her very home! He resides there!” Stephen rasped weakly.

“Sweet Jesus!” Macintosh breathed.

“I must go—now!” Stephen whispered, turning to his father.

“Of course Stephen but…” Michael Colter began and Stephen nodded.

“With your permission father I shall take the
Venture
and any crew I can collect. I will leave the
Windward
, she is loaded to the beams and will take days to make ready.” Stephen turned back to the huge pirate, extending his hand, “Sorry to rush off but I want to be under way by nightfall. Thank you for your help and God willing I shall be in time.”

“Stephen!” Red called and Stephen turned back at the door, “Godspeed lad.”

***

By nightfall Stephen was off, with his own crew, aboard his father’s ship. All his own men had been out for close to three months but insisted on coming and Stephen was thankful, for they all worked as one, knowing their duties and were the most experienced crew a captain could ask for. They were under full sail and would remain so as the weather permitted, making the most of every breath of wind available.

Stephen roamed about the unfamiliar cabin that first night as his mind punished him unmercifully, churning up past words and deeds done to Desiree. He remembered a warm night in September when Desiree had voiced her fears of taking his seed. He remembered his grand speech, declaring she would not have been alone, that he would not have deserted her.

He remembered the next night when she had come to him, trusting him and giving of herself to him in spite of how it went against everything that was her nature. Why hadn’t he seen it then? She wasn’t simply taking him to her for pleasure’s sake; she had loved him, even then. Why hadn’t he voiced his love for her? Instead, he had allowed her fears to fester—fear of his intent, his devotion, until she had recalled all, trying to regain respect for herself; trying to regain her innocence.

She had been in France nearly three months now, living in the same house with the man who meant to see her dead or had the deed been done? What of his child—did it exist? At best he would arrive in early May and Desiree would be in her eight month—or would she? He slammed his fist into his hand, cursing the uncertainty of it all—the urgency and the inability to do more than simply make time as best he knew how.

Chapter Forty-Seven