Lovestruck Forever (20 page)

“I
really have to go,” I told her, forcing my hands to unclench.
“Thanks for the heads up, Lola. You’re a real
sweetheart.”

Though
I put as much sarcasm into the words as possible, she still smiled at
me as if we were bestest friends. “Keep your chin up, Lizzie.”

I
turned away before I could do something I would regret, reminding
myself to take calm, measured steps. There was no way I would give
her the satisfaction of knowing that she had upset me.

It
was bad enough knowing it myself.

Because
as much as I knew that Thomas and I were happy, that he would no
sooner kill a puppy than cheat on me, there was still a sharp little
pain at the mention of Franny’s name. They had been close at
one point, or at least he believed they were. He had loved her. If he
had indeed seen her somewhere, whether by accident or on purpose, I
knew it hadn’t been for any kind of nefarious reason.

But
he didn’t tell me,
I thought to myself, my heart sinking. Even if he had just randomly
run into her, why hadn’t he mentioned it to me?

I
reached the doors to the lobby and there was Thomas, directly ahead
of me, at the bar with Jenner and one of the other executives. He
looked gorgeous in his tux. He was more tan than the last time he’d
worn one, his hair slightly longer in a way that suited his natural
curls. I had the strongest urge to go to him, to run my fingers
through those curls, to smell his familiar cologne and hold onto him
until any trace of hurt or doubt edged away.

He
looked up at me, as if sensing I was there. His entire face lit up at
the sight of me, his eyes quickly flicking down my dress in an
appreciative way that made my stomach flip. If I were a stranger
observing him, if I had watched his face change that way without any
knowledge of the situation, I would have known that I was looking at
a man in love.

And
that’s for you
,
I told myself.
All for
you
.

My
face was already breaking into a smile of its own volition, and I
realized I was walking toward him, drawn to him in that nameless way
I had always been. As I crossed the room to his waiting arms, I left
every fear and doubt that Lola had instilled behind me. There was no
room for them under the weight of that much love.

***

My
phone woke me up the next morning. I fumbled for it on the
nightstand, cursing whoever was calling me so early. “Hello?”

“Lizzie?
Have you seen the papers?”

I
squinted at the alarm clock, shocked to see it was after ten. We had
stayed out quite late at the party and had both stopped keeping track
of our champagne consumption before too long. I looked over at
Thomas’s side of the bed to see that he was sound asleep and
snoring, his hair mussed against the pillow, his mouth wide open.

“Lizzie?”
Callie asked, louder this time. “Are you there?”

“I
just woke up, Cal,” I whispered, pulling myself into a sitting
position. “It’s only ten in the morning here and we were
out all night.”

“Sorry,”
she said quickly, not sounding very sorry at all. “So I take it
you haven’t seen the news?”

“No.”
I felt a little flicker of fear. “Why?”

“Because
you’re everywhere this morning.”

I
frowned at the phone. “What are you talking about?”

“Your
engagement, silly. It’s all over the place. Apparently the
morning shows were all talking about you. And it’s all over the
Internet—all the entertainment sites have pictures of you and
Thomas in San Diego. Someone got a shot of your ring and everyone is
quoting sources saying that you’re planning a fall wedding.”

So
it was out then. I wasn’t surprised; we’d been expecting
the news to leak eventually. I knew Thomas would rather we avoid
having the attention for as long as possible, but it was getting to
be too hard to remember to take my ring off in public. Like last
night.

I
climbed out of bed and padded over to the attached living room so as
not to wake Thomas. “Are the pictures any good?” I asked,
figuring I may as well accept this part of my life. It wasn’t
like there was anything I could do to change it. So long as I was
with Thomas, I was going to be in the papers occasionally. I may as
well make sure I looked half way decent.

“You
look fantastic,” Callie assured me. “Everyone is running
a shot of you guys walking down Rodeo Drive, laughing. You’re
in that blue sundress, the one with the chevron pattern? And then
there are the pictures of the red carpet at that party last night, of
course. That dress is hot, by the way. Where’d you get it?”

“Thanks.
Lorenzo made it for me.”

She
sighed loudly. “I have such fond memories of your first dress
from Lorenzo. And here you are, going to another big fancy movie
party. I wonder if I’ll ever get to rub shoulders with the rich
and famous again.” She stopped short, as if something had just
occurred to her. “Hey, do you think Jackson Coles is still
single?”

“Callie,”
I cried, not sure if I should laugh or be offended. “You’re
dating Charlie.”

We
hung up a few minutes later. I would have liked to climb back into
bed, but I knew Thomas needed to be up for the
Darkness
panel in a few hours. Instead, I pulled on my robe and flicked
through the room service menu. He was going to be annoyed when he
found out about the press leak—the least I could do was to make
sure he had some food in him to take the edge off the grumpiness.

Before
the food arrived, Thomas’s phone rang loudly on his nightstand.
“Hello?” I heard him grumble a moment later. Thomas hated
being woken up in the morning, and it typically took him several
minutes of complaining and tossing and turning until he was able to
face the world.

“What
do you mean it’s all over the papers?” he snarled, his
voice loud. “Why in the hell didn’t you know this was
going to hit today?”

There
was a long pause. Finally I heard him say a terse, “Fine. I’ll
talk to you later.”

I
braced myself for his bad mood, but when he appeared in the living
room, he just looked tired—and really attractive, with his
tousled hair and bare chest. “I take it that was Heidi?”
I asked, scrunching up my face in sympathy.

“You
know already?”

I
held up my phone. “Callie just called.”

He
collapsed onto the couch, pulling me into his side. “Sorry,
love. I was hoping to spare you some of this attention.”

“I
think it’s my fault.” I held up my hand, showing him the
ring. “I keep forgetting to take it off when we go out or when
the press is going to be around. I wore it all last night. I’m
sorry.”

“It’s
not your fault. I like that you don’t want to take it off.
We’ll just have to deal with this now, I guess.”

He
sounded so despondent about it, I couldn’t help but bristle a
little. “If I didn’t know any better, I might think that
you’re embarrassed for people to know about me.”

He
moved on the couch so he was looking at me. “Are you kidding
me?”

I
shrugged. “You seem unnecessarily upset by people finding out.”

Without
responding, he stood up and walked to the bedroom. I stared after
him, wondering what in the hell he was so worked up about that he
would leave in the middle of a conversation. Before I could call out
that very question, he returned with his laptop. He sat again, not
quite so close this time, and opened the lid.

“Thomas—”

“Hang
on.”

I
watched as he typed something onto the keyboard. After a pause, he
turned the laptop so I could see the screen. “This is what I
wanted to avoid.”

It
was some entertainment gossip site. In the center of the page was a
huge picture of the two of us. Just as Callie had said, we were
strolling up Rodeo Drive, laughing at something, my ring glinting
clearly in the bright Californian sun.

I
swallowed. “It’s not the first time I’ve had my
picture taken, Thomas.”

“This
is just the first site I thought to open. How many websites do you
think are running this picture?” Before I could respond, he
typed something else. The screen changed as the new site loaded. This
time it was a shot of just me, standing on the red carpet the night
before in my black dress.
Lizzie’s
Cinderella Wedding
,
the caption read.

I
was starting to feel a little bit sick. But Thomas wasn’t done
yet. He pulled the laptop back around to face him as he changed pages
again. “We’re trending on Twitter. Half the posts on the
official
Darkness
page are about us. Shall I check Tumblr, too? How about Facebook?”

“Okay,
I get it.”

“You
don’t. I didn’t keep us a secret because
I
didn’t want people to know. For God’s sake, Heidi has
been bitching at me to do a big announcement for ages. Thinks it will
be good for my publicity. I kept this a secret for
you
.
Because I know how you feel about all of this.”

I
had a sudden flash of the fear in his eyes the night I’d had my
first paparazzi run in. He’d begged me to stay with him that
night, even sending a driver over to get Callie when I expressed a
desire to spend the evening with her. He’d been terrified that
I was going to leave him now that his career had taken off. I’d
made it very clear to him that I had no interest in being in the
spotlight, that I was uncomfortable with attention.

Before
I could respond, he was continuing. “Do you know how much
creepy mail I get? Every day people send me letters—most of
them are harmless, silly girls being silly. But sometimes… You
think I’m crazy about them mentioning you? Knowing about you?
Following
you?”

I
felt a little sick at the thought. Of course, I didn’t want any
of that, either. But what could we do about it now? The news was
going to get out eventually, and now it had. I took a deep breath.

“Thomas,
I’d be lying if I said I was crazy about all of this.” I
took the laptop from him and set it on the table in front of us.
“It’s not my favorite part of your career. But I can deal
with it a lot better than I used to. I’m a big girl.”

He
ran his hands through his messy hair. “What if you decide
you’ve had enough of all of it?”

“That’s
not going to happen. Besides, how often is it an issue for me? You’re
the one that has to deal with it all the time.”

“Yeah,
but I chose this path.”

“And
I chose you.”

His
face was hard to read for once—I couldn’t tell if that
sentiment comforted him or made him feel worse. “Look.” I
swung my leg over his so that I was sitting on his lap and brought my
arms up around his neck. “I’m okay with it, I really am.
I’m getting more used to it every time someone takes my
picture.”

“You
saw how crazy it got in London,” he said, his voice rough.

“London
tabloids are worse than anywhere else,” I said. “It’s
not like that everywhere.”

He
laughed without humor. “That hardly makes me feel better
considering the fact that we’re moving to London.”

I
smiled sheepishly, realizing he had a point. “So we’ll
hire me a bodyguard or something.” I widened my eyes, making my
expression as hopeful as I could manage. “Ooh, we could get me
someone really cute and sexy. Like a big blond Scandinavian dude that
will protect me with his giant Nordic muscles.”

“You
are in so much trouble,” he said, his eyes flashing. But he was
smiling, and that was all I cared about at that moment. Just as I
moved in to kiss him, there was a knock on the door.

“Who
the bloody hell is that?” he muttered. “It’s
practically the middle of the night.”

“It’s
after ten, dearest.” I kissed his nose. “I ordered you
room service.”

“You’re
trying to get back on my good side through my stomach?” he
asked, eyebrow raised. “Fine, I’ll eat the food, mainly
because I’m starving. But don’t think I’m going to
forget about the Scandinavian hottie.”

I
jumped up from his lap, laughing as I went to the door. “Oh, I
have no plans to forget about him either.”

I
felt like I had barely gotten home before it was time to leave for
New York. Ciara’s assistant had called me with my travel
itinerary before I left San Diego. I was due in New York less than
two weeks from the day I returned home.

I
spent several days in a near state of panic over the trip. The media
attention since the engagement news broke had been unlike anything I
had experienced to that point. Photographers and cameramen camped
outside of our hotel in San Diego. Though Heidi responded to the
situation by hiring additional security, the paparazzi still followed
us everywhere we went, swarming so badly at the airport that we both
missed our flights. The police had to be called to get them off the
property. I had expected things to relax at home, and while it was
nowhere near as bad, it was still very creepy and off-putting to get
calls from reporters at my parents’ house.

“What
if it’s like this in New York?” I asked Thomas over the
phone, doing my best to keep the fear from my voice. “I mean,
it’s one thing for me to move freely through Detroit without
attracting attention, but there are actually paparazzi in New York.
What if they find out I’m there?”

“I’ll
have Heidi’s office coordinate with Ciara.” He, too,
seemed to be struggling to keep his voice steady. I could hear the
stress behind his words. “They’ll do everything they can
to hide the fact that you’re there.”

“How?”

“By
planting stories that you’re somewhere else,” he
explained. “It’s a common tactic. And Heidi’s
office will be on alert in case anything does happen and will make
sure you’re provided with security immediately.” He
paused. “Maybe you should have someone, regardless.”