“Dad didn’t help.” She looked away, and he looked at her, really looked at her. “You look like Mom. Not exactly, but enough to know you’re her daughter. I never noticed that before. But then it’s been a long time since I’ve had a chance to look at you.” He smiled when she turned to him again. And he could see his dad there too, the set of her chin, the way her hair seemed to be in the proper place all the time. He didn’t tell her that, of course, but kept that bit of news to himself. He thought he’d live longer.
“Too long, I’m thinking.” He smiled at her again. “Dad called me at Mr. Emerson’s house. He said that he’s coming here, for both of us. He told me that I owed him and that you did as well. What do you suppose he means by that? Not that I have anything for him right now, but he did say that.”
“I don’t know.” A nurse came in and told him they were going to take him down to x-ray in a bit then left them again. “Will you stay? I mean, I know you have lots of things to do, and—”
“What am I going to do as a wolf?” Allen started to tell her she was alive but she spoke first. “I’m a dog, Allen. A big one with huge teeth. And no matter what I do, for the rest of my life, this thing is going to be inside of me. I can feel her. Moving inside of me like something monstrous. What am I supposed to do?”
“Live.” She shook her head. “Jack, you had to live. If not for you, then for me. When Luke told me that you’d been hurt and that you might not make it, all I could think about was all the things I never got to tell you. All the wonderful things I didn’t know about in your life. I wanted to thank you for what you did. Tell you that no matter what, you washing your hands of me was the best thing that could have happened to me.”
“But I left you there.” Allen nodded. “I didn’t even answer any of your cards, never once acknowledged you in any way. I…I was so afraid you’d hurt me again.”
“I wouldn’t have. I never will again. I promise.” He reached for her hand, and she took his. “I love you, Jack. You’re my sister, all the family…all the family that I want or need. And I do need you to live for us so we can be there for each other.”
They sat there until the nurse came back and she asked Jack if she wanted to go with him. Allen wanted her there. He was terrified that she’d just leave him again. And when she said she’d go, he squeezed her hand as they made their way down the hall. Luke was waiting near the x-ray room when they got there. He didn’t look all that happy, and Allen glared at him as best he could with a swollen face.
“I know she’s your mate and all.” Luke nodded and frowned. “And you have to know that I respect you more than any man I’ve ever known. But if you hurt her, even to make her cry, I’ll kill you.”
Luke only stared at him for several seconds before he looked at Jack. Allen saw the change almost immediately and it occurred to him, just like that, that Luke Emerson loved his sister. Before either of them said anything else, he was pushed into the room to be examined. And for the first time in a very long time, Allen thought that things were going to be looking up. Not perfect, but certainly looking up.
By the time he was put back on the gurney, Allen was sweating. He’d never been twisted into so many shapes in his life. And he was pretty sure that he’d screamed at one point. Looking for his sister as soon as he came out, he was nearly sobbing with disappointment at her not being there. But Luke was.
“She had to go to the bathroom. I told her that I’d make sure you knew, first thing.” Allan nodded and reached for the man’s hand. He wasn’t really surprised when he took it, but he was at the strength of his hold. “You’re going to be all right, Allen. I promise you this.”
“I hurt.” Luke nodded and he could see his sister coming toward them. “You love her, don’t you? Love her very much?”
“I do.” Allen closed his eyes and felt the weight of the world slide off his shoulders. And it was weight that he’d not realized he’d been holding until then. “I won’t hurt her. I know you think I was upset, but not at her. My brother hugged her. Wolves are very possessive of their mate.”
“I understand.” He didn’t really, but it hurt too much to think. “Do you think you could hit me? Really hard. Right now I hurt badly enough that I’d let your wolf hit me if it made the pain go away.”
Luke laughed and he said something to a nurse. It was that voice again, the one he’d used to get the other one to move Jack here. Allen knew in a few minutes, if not sooner, he’d be sliding away on some drugs. As much as he didn’t like them anymore, he knew that if he didn’t get some soon, he was going to be sick. And throwing up with broken ribs wasn’t fun at all.
He was taken to the same emergency room cubical, but this time he wasn’t put onto the bed, but told that he was being transferred to a real one. The thought of moving again nearly had him begging to be left alone, but a nurse came in and told him she was going to give him something for pain. Jack moved out of her way but didn’t leave him. He wasn’t sure if he wanted her to see him cry, because he was going to. And soon if the drugs didn’t kick in.
“I love you.” The nurse grinned at him and he wondered if she’d let him hug her. But instead making a fool of himself, he held onto his sister’s hand while the nurse worked on his other side.
“Tell him.” Jack looked around and Allen knew that she was afraid for Luke to hear. “Tell him what Dad did to you. He has a right to know.”
“No one does. And you should forget it too.” Allen felt the drugs taking their toll on him and he wanted to tell them to stop, that the familiar high was going to be his undoing. But he looked at Jack hard.
“He does. He’s a good man. You’ve no reason to fear him.” Jack shook her head and he could see her tears. It broke at Allen and he wanted to tell her to forget it, but it was important to them both, her and Luke. “Tell him for me. If you never do another thing for me, please tell him.”
“Please don’t do this.” He nodded and closed his eyes. He had to work very hard at getting them opened again, and he stared at his sister, trying to get her to come into focus again.
“If you don’t, then I will have to. Dad is coming and you know what he’ll do.” He felt his eyes drifting shut and got one of them opened as he tried again. “He deserves to know. You did the best you could and now you need him to help you.”
Allen drifted off. His body betrayed him and he felt it sliding away from him before he could beg Jack again. Luke would protect her, because he certainly couldn’t. Not that he’d ever tried, but his father had a way about him that would make most men, human men, run for cover. He was a mean and horribly terrifying person. As his fingers lost their ability to hold onto her hand any longer, Allen tried again, but he wasn’t sure his words even came out right. All he could think about was their dad was coming and he was going to ruin everything again.
Allen slipped into his happy place. A place where no one would bother him, no one could hit him. It was the reason he’d done so many drugs as a kid, then as an adult. No one could get to him here. It was a place all his own that he’d created to escape. But Allen had a feeling that there was going to be no escape this time, no matter how many drugs he might take. And this time, even where he was, he decided that he wasn’t going to go away and let Jack take all the blame, all the hurt. This time he was going to be there for her even if it got him killed.
Chapter 7
Luke had heard them. Jack didn’t want to tell him something, and Allen said he would if she didn’t. Luke had no idea what it was, but he wanted her to tell him. He didn’t like that Allen had to threaten her, but if she told him, he’d forgive the man just about anything. But the way she was sitting in the chair made him believe that he’d turn to stone before she said anything.
“He’ll be all right.” She nodded but said nothing more. “I talked to my brothers. I guess you’re a big hit with them. Ellis said that you were going to make him famous.”
“It wasn’t that much.” Luke nodded and smiled. She looked like she was going to tell him something else, but she only got up to walk around the room. Allen had been sleeping for nearly two hours now and the doctors said it would be another couple before he was awake. They had given him something more after they’d read the film. He shivered when he thought of what the doctor had told them.
“I don’t know how that young man was up and about. He has eleven broken ribs and one of them was all the way through his lung.” The doctor cursed a little under his breath. “And his leg. It looks like someone kicked him with a steel-toed boot. There is enough muscle damage done to him that I’m going to cast it to keep him off it. Whoever did this to him needs to be horsewhipped.”
“I agree.” Luke had already sent Lee to Allen’s room, then his apartment, to look for anything that might have a scent on it. He knew one name and it was going to give him a great deal of pleasure showing the man just what he did to those who dared hurt his family. Ellis was keeping an eye on Danny of Osborne Construction as of right now. And Hunter was keeping a look out for Hank Granger.
Hank Granger was the chief of police, and the sooner he was taken care of, the sooner life could go on at a normal pace. Luke wanted normal. He wanted it almost as badly as he did his mate.
“Can I borrow some money?” Luke looked at Jack when she spoke. “I don’t need a lot…well, I’m not really sure how much I need, but I want to get some paper and some pens and stuff. I need to…I told your brother that I’d do his logo. I don’t have the proper equipment.”
“You can have whatever you want.” She shook her head. “I know you still don’t want to be my mate, but I want to see that you have anything and everything you need.”
“I don’t know what I need.” He had a feeling she was talking about more than just paper and such. “I was wondering if you’d ask Mr. Emerson if I could use a room. There’s this one in the back of his house that has a lot of windows. I don’t think he’s using it right now.”
Luke knew the room. His dad had said it would make a great studio and had even asked Slone what she’d used it for. She said that mostly she used the room as a green house in the winter months. It was one of the reasons that her and his dad had started on their own greenhouse. The two of them were having a blast.
“I’m sure that he won’t mind.” She nodded. “Jack, could you come with me tonight to find a house? I have three in mind, and I’d very much like to have you look at them with me.”
“I don’t know anything about houses. I’ve never even lived in one.” He was surprised by that but didn’t comment as she continued. “After my mom died, we lived in a trailer with my father. We had…I guess they’d be called houses, but it was really just two apartments built in the same building. Before that it was a townhouse that was in a high income neighborhood. But in the trailer, our neighbors were so close to us when one of them had a cold, we caught it.”
“I thought your family had money.” She said her dad did, not them. “I don’t understand the difference. If he had it, wouldn’t you have had some as well?”
“No. He was very creative in the way he kept it from us. When Mom passed away he was getting a check each month to care for Allen. Then there was Mom’s insurance. He said he had invested it in our futures. So far as I could ever see, all it did was make him a pompous tight ass.” She looked at him. “I asked him for a pen set once, to draw. He told me that as my mother’s child, I would have to earn the right for them. I never understood that, so I did chores for the neighbors and earned the money for them. He said that I was ungrateful. I told him he was a prick.”
He laughed and she smiled at him. It was the first one he’d seen on her since he’d met her. Getting up, he moved to her slowly, wanting more than anything to simply hold her. When she didn’t back away, he reached out and touched his finger gently to her cheek.
“You’re very beautiful. And I’m so glad that you’re in my life.” Jack just stared at him and when she licked her lips, he decided that he needed just a taste of her. A small one. “Can I kiss you, love? Will you let me hold you to my body and kiss you?”
“I’m afraid.” He nodded but lowered his head to her mouth. “You’re going to find out things about me that are going to sicken you. You’ll hate me when you do.”
“Never.” He touched his mouth to her and felt the slick warmth that was all hers. Taking her lower lip into his mouth, he nibbled gently on it as he watched her eyes. They darkened and he could see her desire. Deepening the kiss, he pulled her body to his and wrapped her into his arms as his tongue and hers danced.
Luke wanted her. Not just for sex, even though the thought of taking her to the wall and pounding into her was appealing, but he wanted her in his life. He needed her to be his companion, as stupid as that sounded. He wanted to laugh with her, work with her, and more than anything, he wanted her to love him. Lifting his head from hers, he held her but watched her face as she tried to cover her need.
“Come with me tonight. We need a home of our own. Somewhere I can take you on the kitchen table, feast on you without anyone interrupting us. I want you to have your own studio, a place you can work, play, or even read a book should you want.” She nodded and he felt as if he’d been given a gift. “We’ll go as soon as I can arrange with the realtor.”
“I will pay half.” He started to tell her no she wouldn’t, that he was the provider, but only nodded. She could pay the entire mortgage if she would stay with him there. Not that it was going to happen, but he would do what she needed. “And if you don’t mind, I’d like to have a garden too. Not like your sister’s, but something smaller. Way smaller. There are some herbs I’d like to grow that I can use.”
“You can cook?” She nodded and told him she did, but didn’t get to much because of her apartment being so small. “Okay, then we’ll get something with a huge kitchen. Something…shit, I don’t know, something you like in that department. Because if you can boil water, you have one up on me.”
She laughed and he pulled her tighter to him. He had no idea why the sound of her laughter made him all soft inside, but it did. Pulling her with him, he sat in the chair she’d been in and pulled her into his lap. She didn’t fight with him but snuggled up under his chin as she sat there. It was on the tip of his tongue to ask her about the conversation she’d had with Allen, but he decided to wait. Whatever it was, he’d find out soon, he knew it.
It was another hour before Allen stirred. He told them to go away that he was fine, but Jack told him she wanted to stay with him. He told her to go home and leave him to his misery. Finally she said she’d go.
“Jack?” She turned back to Allen just as they were set to go. “Will you do me a favor? Tell them no more drugs. I don’t want to get into that again. Please, just tell them something over the counter. This felt really good, but I don’t…I don’t want to get back there again.”
She told him that she would and kissed him on the cheek. Luke felt his wolf stir, but he didn’t make too much of a fuss. The sooner he talked to Jack about this the better. But as they were going toward the elevator, he decided that he wouldn’t. He wanted her to get all the comfort she could get. Luke groaned when his dad stepped out of the yawning opening and laughed. It was going to be a long night.
~~~
They’d been to three houses. Jack had liked the first one okay, but the second and third were simply ugly. She was pretty sure that the second one had a dead body in the basement, and she told Luke that as they drove to the third one. He told her he’d smelled it as well. His dad said he thought there had been a cat in the place too. Cash said he could smell the cat piss as soon as they got out of the car.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you.” She tensed up and waited for his dad. Jack was so afraid that he’d ask her for something she’d never be able to give him, and she liked the older man enough that she’d get it at all costs. “When you found out you were a wolf, you seemed to take it pretty good. Damned good as a matter of fact. Like you knew about us long before then. Did you? Know about weres, I mean?”
Jack glanced at Luke but he kept his eyes on the road. She wanted to avoid the question, because questions always led to more questions, and she wasn’t ready to go into a great many things just yet.
“Do you know a man by the name of Dan Rogers? He said that he’d worked for Luke’s brother, Ellis. I know his dad. He…I was hurt one night and he saved me. By becoming a wolf. He always told me that I was just seeing things, but…. A few weeks later, after the incident, I was working late, again, and I pulled up the security video. I watched it seven times before I finally put it away.”
“Max is a good man. He brought you something.” Luke asked his dad to hand him the box that was lying on the back seat. “I meant to give it to you the other day, but you kept making me forget.”
She took the little box and stared at it for several seconds before she opened it. It was her cards, all of them that Allen had sent her. When the second item was handed to her, much bigger than the box, she looked at both men and burst into tears. It was the things she’d wanted from her desk.
“My mom bought me this.” She pulled out the little vase that was chipped a long time ago when she’d been moved to another floor at work. She ran her fingers over the lovely little vase. The little angel wasn’t expensive, but it meant the world to her. “She said it would watch over me as I worked. It never did…I’m pretty sure she got one that said to turn her back on me, but I love it.”
There were other things in the box. Her pens and brushes. Pads of papers that she’d been keeping notes in for herself. There were cheap colored pencils that she’d gotten last month, and her sketch pads she’d had since high school. Jack thumbed through them as they drove to the last house for the night.
“He said that when he heard about your place going up he went there that night and cleaned out your desk. Said that he had to hide it all too. Because he knew that they’d toss it out if it was left for them to care for.” Jack nodded at Cash, too overwhelmed to speak yet. “I think he’s got something else for you too. Though I’ve no idea what it could be.”
“Your car.” She looked at Luke. “He had Dan come for a short visit and they drove it back. Said you’d left it in the street that day and they impounded it. After they talked to the police there, Max was able to get it for you and bring it here. He said that the man was a wolf of good standing and understood what you were going through.”
“I don’t know what to say.” She looked at her things, all the stuff she had of her own in the world, and held them to her breast. Jack started to ask if she could talk to Max, but they were pulling into the drive of the final house before she could. The house…if that’s what they called castles this big around here…was magnificent.
“This is lovely.” It was also an understatement, but she nodded to Cash. “You think that barn goes with it? Sure would make a nice place to store the tractor if you got yourself one.”
“Or a studio.” Jack moved up the walkway toward the house as if in a trance as Luke continued talking to his dad. The realtor met them at the door, but she walked by him to go into the house. It was perfect. The entrance hall was something she’d dreamed of her entire life. Running her hands over the chair board, she moved out of the hall into a large open space. And there she fell in love.
The wide staircase nearly filled all the space where she stood. At the top, there was a stain-glassed window that looked to be about ten feet wide and at least five feet high. The stair case split there and moved up onto the landings above her, and she could just make out doors that were all open right now. It looked like five on each side. Luke put his hands on her shoulders and she leaned back into him. He nipped at her ear lobe before speaking softly to her.
“I’m assuming you like this one.” She nodded and pulled away to follow the agent. He took them into a sunken living room that had a fireplace in it as big as her entire apartment had been. She wondered if anyone had roasted a beef in it and just caught herself giggling.
The walls were covered in large shelves. Not the kind that would be just for books but for decorations. Fuf-fuf things, she called them. Things that had no value but to the person who sat them on the deep shelves.
The next room they entered was a library. The entire room was surrounded with more shelves. A ladder was stationed on either side of the large windows that looked out over an expansive yard. There was a covered pool there as well as a pool house. And next to it was the barn. She stared at it as she filled the big building with her art supplies in her mind. And a drawing table.
The dining room was across the hallway from the living room. As they entered it, she touched the built in cabinets and the large table. There were enough chairs around it that they could eat at a different place for a week. Eighteen chairs, eight on each side as well as one on each end.