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Authors: Elisabeth Wolf

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BOOK: Lulu in Honolulu
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ELECTRICIAN

(thinks a moment)

Actually, less. I wouldn't have to run all the cable. The bulbs would just power up from the sunlight that they'd store during the day.

ALEXIS

(to Electrician)

Then let's do that.

LULU

Lex! I'm really helping! I'm saving the movie money.

SCENE 18: PARTY 411

INT. HARRISONS' ENTRY HALL—SATURDAY, 8 A.M.

Rain pelts the house. Sheets of water slide down the floor-to-ceiling glass
lanai
doors that Lulu can never remember seeing shut. Lulu sits in a poufy vanilla-colored chair and stares outside. She wears orange pajamas. Her hair looks like it was combed with an electric eggbeater. Fiona breezes down the stairs.

LULU

(tired but happy to see her mom)

Good morning, Mom.

Fiona is fully dressed in fitted black pants, a loose white silk tank top, black pointy pumps, and her standard men's gold watch and diamond love bangles. She's wearing a pair of vintage Oliver Peoples sunglasses.

FIONA

(all business)

You're up early, Lulu.

LULU

I'm excited about the
Seas the Day
party tonight. Lex let me work on it. Mom, I wanna help you however I can.

Fiona lets her sunglasses slide down her nose. She looks at Lulu over the dark lenses.

FIONA

Lu, this party is not really a party. It's a way to thank my actors and crew for working so hard. And, most important, I've got Mr. Sanyo coming. Linc and I need to make him feel like a king, got it?

LULU

Got it.

FIONA

And, being British, I have no trouble showing respect for the king, especially one like Mr. Sanyo, who's already paid millions of dollars to let me make
Seas the Day.

Linc bounds down the wide, floating staircase. He appears sporting dark sunglasses, slicked-back wet hair, expensive jeans that look battered, a James Perse black T-shirt, and Gucci flip-flops.

LINC

(calls from the middle of the stairs)

I'm not late yet!

Linc reaches the bottom and gives Lulu a quick kiss.

LINC

Lu, if I were you, I'd still be in bed.

LULU

I want to know if there's anything you guys want me to do for the party tonight.

Fiona crouches down in front of her daughter and flicks her sunglasses to the top of her head.

FIONA

Please, darling. No mischief tonight.

LINC

(looks at Lulu from above Fiona's head)

That means, specifically: lock up your insane dog and don't go near any of the food.

Alexis, in polka-dot pajama bottoms and a gray tank top, perches at the top of the stairs. Her long, mussed ponytail is the first clue that she's just rolled out of bed. She giggles.

LULU

I understand. All Mom's hard-working actors and crew have a super fun time and Mr. Sanyo has so much fun he gives Mom more money.

Linc winks. Fiona stands up.

LULU

My Ohana friends will come dressed and ready to perform and then watch the fireworks with me. We won't even talk to other guests. Right, Lex?

Lulu looks up at her sister.

Almost at the front door, Fiona pauses and shoots Alexis a “what's this?” look.

ALEXIS

Don't worry, Fiona, it'll be fine. They won't be performing their
Hilarious Hula
. Some of Lulu's camp pals are
très
talented.

Fiona and Linc EXIT.

INT. HARRISON ENTRANCE—CONTINUOUS

Lulu leaps from the chair and knocks over a mahogany bowl filled with kiwi. The brown fuzzy balls roll everywhere. Lulu tries to catch them but immediately steps on one and squishes it into the floor.

Maya comes into the entrance.

MAYA

Lulu, this reminds me.

LULU

Maya, I'm sorry. I'll clean up.

Maya takes Lulu's hand and leads her to the stairs.

MAYA

I put a new pair of shoes in your room for you.

LULU

For tonight? Party shoes?

MAYA

Well, let's say they're for everything.

Lulu races up stairs, ducks into her room, and, after a minute, reappears. She holds toddler-sized cream-colored cut-out Mary Janes with orange floral straps.

LULU

You mean these?

Maya's face folds in the usual worn lines as she smiles.

Lulu plows down the stairs and plunks down on the bottom one.

LULU

These won't fit me.

MAYA

Right. They are for little ones when they first learn to walk, but I want you to have them.

Maya sits down next to Lulu. Lulu burrows her head into Maya's arm.

LULU

(muffled)

Why?

MAYA

Because I want you to slow down. Squeaky shoes make a child think about every step she takes. She takes a step. She hears squeak. Makes every step important. She can hear when she slows down or when she speeds up.

LULU

What if, sometimes, the kid doesn't even know what direction to walk?

Maya puts her arm around Lulu. Maya squeezes the tip of the shoe. The SQUEEEAK makes Lulu smile.

MAYA

Then that kid should take a moment to sit quietly.

SCENE 19: WHEN IT RAINS, IT POURS

INT./EXT. HARRISONS' HOUSE—SATURDAY NIGHT

INTERIOR SHOT—Camera pans to a tent full of handsome, fit men and beautiful, slim women. Waiters in Hawaiian shirts pass asparagus wrapped with ham and tofu balls. Fiona, in a long floral-printed wrap dress and spiky heels, floats among party guests. Linc wears his usual slouchy designer jeans with a Turnbull & Asser dress shirt, untucked. He drifts around the tent, slapping guys on the back and hugging women.

Lulu and Alexis poke their heads into the tent. Lulu wears her trademark orange skirt and a clean SURF MOLOKAI T-shirt. For the occasion, her hair has been somewhat tamed into a ponytail that looks like a pom-pom. Alexis wears skintight white jeans and a silver sheath tunic.

LULU

It's going great! And geez peas! The rain's stopped.

Lulu and Alexis both glance up. The gray sky is fading from purple to black. Stars can't be seen but neither can rain clouds or lightning.

ALEXIS

Not exactly great because I still don't see Mr. Sanyo.

LULU

(heading toward the house)

Let's check if he's inside.

Alexis teeters after her sister. Normally perfectly graceful on her heels, Alexis slips a bit on the wet
lanai
. She looks around embarrassed. Fortunately, no one notices.

INT. HARRISONS' KITCHEN—FIVE MINUTES LATER

Lulu and Alexis sneak into the kitchen. WAITERS bustle in and out.

ALEXIS

Seriously, I wonder why Sanyo hasn't showed.

Lulu leans over the counter.

LULU

Is this a chocolate lava cake?

She drags her finger around edge, then sticks it in her mouth.

ALEXIS

Lu! That's disgusting.

Lulu sucks the sweet, sticky chocolate off her finger.

Mr. Sanyo enters kitchen.

MR. SANYO

(booming voice)

Excuse me? Can someone store this for me?

(holds out a jar of peanut butter)

I add this to food for flavor, and this is the only brand I'll use.

Everyone freezes. Lulu, however, bounces over and takes the jar.

LULU

Sure, I love PB—

CRASH. The glass jar shatters on the kitchen floor. It slid through Lulu's saliva-wet fingers.

LULU

I'm sooo sorry. I have another jar here I can share with you.

Mr. Sanyo gives Lulu a hard stare and leaves the kitchen.

EXT.
LANAI
and POOL AREA—THIRTY MINUTES LATER

Guests huddle in near darkness. Lights from inside the house cast shadows on the
lanai
. Small tea-light candles illuminate a path from the
lanai
to the stage floating in the pool.

LULU

(to Fiona and Linc)

How was I supposed to know that the solar lights needed a whole day of sunlight?

LINC

(not at all laid-back and cool)

Why'd YOU even have a say in the lights for this party?

FIONA

(a take-charge calm in her voice)

Forget it. The show must go on!

ALEXIS

Besides, it does look
très
romantic and dramatic.

All the Harrisons look toward the floating stage and the candlelight reflecting in the water around it.

Fiona and Linc walk to the far side of the pool and take the stage.

WIDE SHOT of Fiona and Linc standing in the middle of the floating stage. They look magical in the glimmer of the small candles. Fiona's dress shimmers from the bottom up.

FIONA

I want to thank you all very much for coming by our house tonight.

LINC

(grabbing a microphone from his wife)

And next time, let us know you're coming and we'll turn the lights on!

LAUGHING heard from the guests.

FIONA

I don't want to take much time for speeches. This night is about us finally taking a few moments to relax. We've all been working incredibly long hours.

Lulu, sitting at the edge of the pool, hears a commotion behind her. She turns to see her Ohana pals. Auntie Moana corrals kids in the living room. Lulu stands.

FIONA

There is only one person I'd like to have come up, so I can thank him in front of all of you, and that's Mr. Hiyra Sanyo,
(CLAPPING)
president of Sanyo Studios, who believed in me and in
Seas the Day
becoming a great motion pic—

Lulu takes off toward her friends but keeps turning back to look at her mother.

THUD. THWACK. Mr. Sanyo, in the darkness, BUMPS into Lulu. They both SLIP on the rain-soaked floor. SPLASH. Mr. Sanyo ends up in the pool. Not a sound can be heard except Mr. Sanyo sputtering in the water.

Mr. Sanyo, not a good swimmer, and disoriented by the fall and the darkness, struggles in the water. Lulu, Linc, and Fiona all dive in.

LULU

I'm coming Mr.—

Linc beats Lulu. He smoothly and athletically brings Mr. Sanyo to the side of the pool.

LULU

I'm really—

Alexis appears with towels.

FIONA

(hisses from the pool)

Alexis, get the fireworks going. Distract everyone. NOW!

Alexis kicks off her shoes and dashes to find one of the Pele guys. Meanwhile, the Ohana kids pile onto the
lanai
to see what's happening.

Lulu, wrapped in a towel, squishes toward her friends.

LULU

Geez peas! I almost drowned the head of Mom's studio.

KENNA

That guy could barely doggie-paddle.

KAPONO

That guy's a worse swimmer than Watson.

Ohana kids laugh.

NOELANI

(softly)

Lu, it wasn't your fault.

LULU

(squinting in the darkness)

Hey! Noelani! What are you doing here?! You're supposed to be talking to your mom on her ship.

Noelani is dressed in the most beautiful deep-green ti-leaf hula skirt and wears a yellow hibiscus in her hair.

NOELANI

(whispers)

I'm gonna do it, Lu. Don't worry. I can hula tonight. My mom understands I'm doing this for you and…for me.

FAAAROOOMPH! CRAAAACK! PAAAACHOOOOM!

A screaming firework flies up. It shoots toward the night sky, but jerks down and lands near guests huddled on the
lanai
.

A second firework takes off and fizzles out just above the party tent.

The third explosive smacks into bamboo hedges next to the house. Stalks begin to smolder.

GUESTS and WAITERS

FIRE!!

CAMERA PANS the scene. Alexis and Maxwell run into the house hand in hand. Cast and crew members scramble inside and then out the front door.

Auntie Moana gathers up the Ohana kids and calmly leads them to the beach at the edge of the Harrison's backyard. Uncle Akamu dashes toward the burning, crackling bamboo. He grabs towels from the damp ground and starts whacking yellow-white flames. Lulu approaches and gives him her wet towels. Since everything is damp from rain, the fire begins to sputter out.

UNCLE AKAMU

Mahalo
, Lulu. Now get away from here.

LULU

Considering how many people here want to kill me right now, I think I'm safest by the fire.

ACT III: A HAPPY LANDING
SCENE 1: THE DAWN'S EARLY LIGHT

EXT. INFINITY POOL—SUNDAY, 7 A.M.

CUT!! I have NO idea how I'm gonna get through this day. Anyway, to sum up last night, my parents are furious. Mr. Sanyo is furious. Getting in his car, he told Mom that Sanyo Studios is done with her! Of course, he was saying this while he was dripping wet and couldn't see because his glasses were somewhere at the bottom of our pool, so I'm secretly hoping he didn't really mean it. Rather than helping Mom and Dad, and supporting them as a family member should, I turned everything into a mess that I can't see a way to fix. But first things first. I need to apologize
pronto
. OK, return to: ACTION!!

Birds sing. Soft orangey light slowly glows over the gentle, purple sky. Linc swims laps across the long pool. He's like a machine, rarely taking a breath and never stopping.

LULU

(loudly)

Dad!

Linc doesn't hear. His head isn't above water long enough.

LULU

(hollers)

Daaad!

Linc, without breaking his stroke, gives Lulu a wave.

LULU

I want to apologize.

Lulu, still in pajamas, comes to the pool's edge. She holds two glasses full of white, creamy drinks.

LULU

I've made us coconut smoothies…to ask for your forgiveness.

Without slowing, Linc flashes five fingers.

Unsure if that means five laps, five seconds, or five minutes, Lulu squats at pools edge.

LULU

Daaahhhh…

SPLLLLLAAAASH!!

Lulu and two thick drinks tumble into the crystal-clear pool.

Linc speeds over to her.

Lulu bubbles to the surface. Coconut chunks cling to her hair. She swims to the side. Linc pulls out the two glasses and sets them on the pool's edge.

LINC

(grinning)

I think this pool is a hazard, babe. We should probably fill it in.

LULU

(struggles to look her dad in the eye)

Dad, I've made a mess.

Linc flips his swimming goggles to the top of his head.

LINC

(chuckles)

Yes, you have. My pool water's a little murky and so is my movie career.

Lulu notices a cloud-shaped smoothie floating on the water toward them. She shakes her head.

LULU

So you're not too mad at me? You're not going to send me to Timbuktu or something?

LINC

(more serious tone)

Not Timbuktu. But L.A. maybe.

Linc ducks his head underwater to slick back his thick hair.

(now above the surface)

Fiona and I have to figure out what to do. Your mom will have way more free time after today.

CAMERA FOCUSES ON FIONA. She stands regally a few feet from the pool.

FIONA

(sharp tone)

C'mon, Linc! We need to get to the set. I have to reshoot scenes you messed up yesterday.

Fiona is fully dressed in billowing navy pants and a crisp, white blouse. A blue-and-white-striped silky sweater is draped around her narrow shoulders. Huge sunglasses cover the top half of her face.

LINC

(hard tone)

You're not going to be my boss for too much longer. Let me relax.

FIONA

(cold and stiff)

You can relax when the NEW director takes over.

Linc jumps out of the pool and grabs his towel. Lulu remains in the water.

FIONA

As for you, Lulu…

LULU

Mom, I got up super-looper early to say I was sorry for everything. I…

FIONA

(staring down at Lulu through her sunglasses)

Seas the Day
is over for me. Last night, Mr. Sanyo fired me. Sanyo Studios is hiring a new director.

Lulu looks up at her mother from the pool.

LULU

Mom, I only—

FIONA

It's time I sent you home.

Lulu ducks underwater so her tears mingle with the smoothie-infused pool water. After a few seconds, she comes to the surface.

LULU

Mom? If you're not working on the movie for the rest of the summer, then maybe we can just explore O'ahu together. Find old koa trees? See monk seals at the Honolulu Aquarium? Visit the—

FIONA

For your information, in 1778, Captain James Cook, a British citizen, like me, was the first European to discover the Hawaiian Islands. But guess what he did?

LULU

What?

FIONA

He actually sailed past O'ahu and landed on Kauai. So that's what I'm going to do. Of course, I should have never first landed on O'ahu, but now I'm going to close down everything here and go off to Kauai for a few weeks.

LULU

Mom, can't we all go? That sounds like a real summer vacation.

FIONA

I told you weeks ago. I canceled summer vacation!

CUT!! This is one of those times I've gotta tell you how I feel inside: miserable. I know scripts are supposed to only show, but showing how I feel now would have me drench my mother with pool water and then do somersaults underwater till she changes her mind. Back to: ACTION!!

SCENE 2: BIKINI BRAIN FREEZE

INT. ALEXIS'S ROOM—SUNDAY, 9 A.M.

Mini-mountains of bikinis have sprung up all around Alexis's normally tidy room. Tops and bottoms are piled by color and style. The highest mountain, so far, is red tops.

Lulu enters after a quick knock. If she waits for an answer, she knows she'd be told “go away.”

LULU

(glancing around)

Geez peas! You've got a lot of bikinis.

Alexis ignores her and continues opening drawers, dumping out every bikini inside, and slamming the drawers shut. Then she sorts and stacks bikini tops and bottoms.

LULU

What are you doing? Are you having a bikini garage sale with all these?

Lulu carefully makes her way around hills of yellow tops and lavender bottoms toward Alexis's puffy, white, unmade bed. Lulu accidentally stumbles on flower-print bottoms. They scatter under the bed.

ALEXIS

Lulu, just get out! I've got lots going on here.

LULU

I can see that. You've got a mess-a-rama in here.

ALEXIS

(waves her bony wrist around)

It's not as bad as the mess we made out there last night.

Lulu crawls under the bed and fishes out three skimpy, flowered bottoms.

LULU

It's really clean under your bed.

ALEXIS

(tugs nervously at the ends of her hair)

Good, because I'm thinking of hiding under there till Fiona ships us home. Or maybe I should try swimming to L.A. this afternoon. I wish I knew how far it was.

LULU

It's about two thousand five hundred and fifty miles. More than you could swim in a day, plus you'd have to deal with rip currents, trade winds, rough seas, carnivorous marine life, and—

ALEXIS

That all sounds better than facing Fiona. Not to mention Maxwell.

LULU

Well, I came in here to figure out how we can get Mom hired back to finish the end of the movie.

ALEXIS

What are you talking about?
Seas the Day
will have a new director to finish the movie and shoot the big final scene. And, even worse for Fiona, Linc will be working for the new director.

Alexis pauses to toss a black top on the black-bikini-top mound.

ALEXIS

This family has been busted up for the rest of summer.

LULU

That's exactly why we need to combine our brains and figure out how to weave us all back together.

ALEXIS

Do you have island fever or something? You trying to help might be the single worst thing that happened to this family all summer. The second would be my agreeing to do anything with you.

Alexis pulls out a whole drawer and dumps more trendy bikini pieces on the bed. She starts separating tops from bottoms. Lulu spots an orange bikini in Alexis's new pile.

LULU

(points to it)

You have a bikini in my favorite color?

ALEXIS

(plucks out the suit)

The color of this bikini is called cantaloupe. If I give this to you, will you get out of my room? I'm dealing with a bikini brain freeze!

Alexis tosses the suit toward Lulu.

LULU

What's a “bikini brain freeze”?

Alexis, eyes bulging, sits down on a mound of white bikini bottoms. She draws her knees up to her body and hugs them. She drops her head so her forehead rests on the tops of her knees.

LULU

Are you sick right now from the bikini-brain-freeze thing?

ALEXIS

(lifts her head)

Right now…

(now screaming)

I'm SICK of YOU!

Lulu squeezes her eyes shut.

LULU

I thought we—

ALEXIS

Don't finish any sentence that has the word “
we”
in it. Thanks to you, Maxwell thinks I'm an idiot. Linc and Fiona won't have a movie. And now I'm trapped on an island in the worst summer ever!

LULU

—were a team.

Alexis stands up and gets back to sorting bikinis.

ALEXIS

Well, you've been dropped, traded, fired. Don't talk to me until sometime around Christmas.

Lulu slowly heads toward the door.

LULU

What's bikini brain freeze anyway?

ALEXIS

It's that I can't think about anything except counting and organizing my swimsuits. OK?! It's calming me down. At least, it was working before you came in. NOW GET OUT.

SCENE 3: L.A. CALLING

INT. LULU'S BEDROOM—SUNDAY, 10 A.M.

Lulu lies on the floor of her room, stacking coral. Since the white, hard chunks have textured surfaces and curved edges, Lulu can't get more than three pieces on top of each other before they clatter down.

DO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DOOO-DO-DO-DO-DO-DOOOO.

Hawaii
Five-O
theme music muffles from somewhere in Lulu's closet. She rifles through skirts, surf T-shirts, and checkered Vans on the closet floor.

LULU

(to herself)

Please be my Ohana friends wanting to know if I'm still alive.
Kokoa
, please.

She finds her phone in a shoe. She punches the screen with her forefinger.

(almost breathless)

Aloha
, it's me, Lulu.

Lulu leans back on the floor of her closet.

GIRL'S VOICE THROUGH THE PHONE

Surprise! Lu?

LULU

(checks the number on the phone screen)

Hey? This is a number from Los Angeles! Sophia? You're calling?

SOPHIA

(warm, sweet voice)

It's me.

Lulu can tell that her best friend from home is smiling. She can feel the smile coming through the phone and breaks into a grin of her own as she leans against the closet door.

SOPHIA

Thank you for sending me the video of the Halona Blowhole.

LULU

It's awesome, right? How the water shoots up?

SOPHIA

Loved it. And, well, everyone here keeps watching
Hilarious Hula
.

Lulu's smile disappears. She tilts her head back.

LULU

(sad)

That seems SO long ago.

SOPHIA

(serious)

I sure miss you, Lulu.

LULU

I feel lost, Soph, and I don't know that I've ever felt like this before.

PAUSE. Sound of SLUSHING water.

SOPHIA

What's that noise? Is it raining there?

Lulu listens.

LULU

That's just Watson drinking out of the toilet bowl.

(chuckles)

He's only been drinking toilet water in Hawaii. I think it's because toilet water stays cooler than the water in his bowl. It's so HOT here!

SOPHIA

Hotter than L.A.?

LULU

Different hot.

(pauses)

But I think I'll be back in L.A. hot soon.

SOPHIA

That's why I'm calling.

(voice drops)

Lu, I heard from my mom that your mom isn't finishing her movie.

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